When Lu Zeyan walked into the office the next morning, he half expected security to say she'd run off.
But the first thing he saw was… her.
Xu Yinyin.
Sitting at his assistant's desk.
Wearing a bright yellow hoodie under her blazer.
With a bubble tea cup labeled: "For the CEO's cold, dead soul ❤️."
"Morning, Boss!" she grinned.
His eye twitched.
"You actually came back."
"I would've come earlier, but I got into a fight with the vending machine on floor 3. It ate my money and my dignity."
He blinked. "...And you still came up here?"
"I never give up when I'm broke."
Inside his office, Lu Zeyan flipped open his tablet. "You'll be managing my schedule, preparing meeting briefs, and filtering emails. Think you can handle that?"
"I once organized a surprise wedding for a couple who weren't even dating. I got this."
He paused. "...Excuse me?"
"Long story. Do you want your morning coffee now, or after I destroy your calendar?"
He narrowed his eyes. "Black, no sugar."
She saluted. "Got it. One mood-matching beverage, coming up."
Ten minutes later, she returned with… a venti vanilla latte with a smiley face sticker.
"I said black," he said, staring at the overly cheerful cup.
"But this one's happier," she said. "Drink it. Let it bless your aura."
"I don't have an aura."
"You do. It's just… murderous."
She was a walking HR complaint.
She sang while typing.
She talked to the potted plants.
She decorated her desk with a pink llama pencil holder and named it "Vice President Fluffy."
But worst of all?
She was efficient.
Her chaotic typing actually translated into accurate minutes. She reorganized the meeting files by color. And when a manager panicked over a missing document, she found it in under 30 seconds—by checking the trash folder.
"I always check the trash first," she said proudly. "That's where my dreams usually go."
Later that day, Lu Zeyan stood by the window, looking down at the city skyline.
Behind him, Xu Yinyin placed a small cactus on his desk.
"What's that?"
"A plant. Duh."
"I don't want plants."
"But you need friends."
"It's a cactus."
"It's low maintenance. Like you. I named it Lu Jr."
He turned slowly. "You named a cactus after me?"
"Only because I couldn't find one colder."
He didn't smile. Of course not. That would be impossible.
Right?
But when she wasn't looking, something about the way she talked to the cactus like it was a VIP client…
It made one side of his mouth twitch.
Just a little.