Chapter Five:
The night air hit me like a slap.
Cold. Sharp. Real.
I stepped out of the bar like I'd just escaped a fire, and maybe I had. My lips still burned, traitors that they were, and my heart hadn't stopped racing since I slammed that lounge door shut.
I kept walking. Fast. Head down. Like if I moved quickly enough, the memories wouldn't catch up.
But they always do.
They followed me across the street, around the corner, into the dark silence of my apartment. They waited patiently until I was alone. Until the lights were off. Until the mask slipped.
Then they whispered.
You kissed him.
I threw my purse on the couch and pressed my palms against my face.
"Stupid, stupid, stupid."
I'd spent two years building walls, crafting distance, learning how to breathe without him. And with one kiss, he'd wrecked all of it.
No—I had let him.
Because the truth was, I never really stopped loving Jace.
I just got better at hiding it.
My phone buzzed on the counter. I didn't need to look to know it was him. I stared at it anyway, like it might explode. Like his name would bring back the feeling of his lips on mine.
It buzzed again.
Jace: Are you home safe?Jace: Can we talk?
No.No, we cannot talk.Because if we talk, I'll see those eyes again. Hear that voice again. And I might not walk away a second time.
I turned my phone face-down and walked to my bedroom, kicking off my heels like they were reminders of my mistake.
But the worst part wasn't the kiss.It wasn't even that I let it happen.
It was the voice in the back of my mind asking a question I didn't want to answer:
"What if he meant it this time?"