Mike's death affected me. Even though he wasn't someone particularly close to me, I couldn't avoid feeling guilty about what happened to him. These things happen, right? In the military, you can come across death at any moment, can't you? Maybe I was just trying to ease the guilt… but I couldn't.
It's been several days since that incursion. Since then, I've felt different.
Is this maturity... or trauma?
This year, I've lived through more than in my entire life before.
Suddenly, I got a call.
—"Who could it be?"
I looked at the screen. It was Kraf. I answered.
—"Traytros, how are you?"
—"Well… I guess I'm okay."
—"Perfect. Can you come to my office?"
—"Alright. I'll be there in a few minutes."
I hung up. It caught me off guard. It was probably for a mission or an assignment.
When I arrived at the office, I saw him talking with Thomas. I greeted them, and they nodded back.
Kraf got straight to the point:
—"Good thing you came! Do you remember the samples we recovered? We also retrieved files on how the experiments were done. After some testing, we've finalized an upgrade for the genetic evolution machine."
—"What? I don't get it."
—"In simple terms: are you ready for your upgrade?"
Apparently, they had optimized the machine that enhances First Class soldiers. I was curious… but also scared.
What if something went wrong?
I pushed those thoughts aside and focused. If it worked, I'd be able to help even more.
—"Alright. Let's do it."
We arrived at the lab. There was a capsule of some kind.
—"Welcome to the Defense Building's lab. The most advanced in the world so far," said Kraf.
He pointed at the capsule.
—"See that machine? I need you to step inside. I'll hook you up."
It looked like one of those sci-fi pods where they put aliens—water, wires, isolation.
I got in. Kraf and another scientist started attaching an oxygen mask, pulse sensors, respiration, temperature monitors…
The other scientist spoke:
—"Perfect. This subject is ideal to definitively test the machine. If you survive, I'll run some tests on you… hehehe."
I stared at him seriously.
"If I survive?"
There was no turning back now. Knowing Thomas had already gone through this gave me some peace.
Once everything was in place, Kraf sealed the capsule. The liquid started filling the tank.
—"It's normal to feel sleepy," Kraf said. "The upgrade will accelerate your metabolism. In short: you'll become a superhuman. Your heart and breathing will spike before you pass out. You'll be in there for at least a day."
A whole day!?
The liquid was green.
—"Is it radioactive?"
—"Yes, but controlled," Kraf answered.
Once it was full, I began to float. My heart was pounding. My breathing quickened. It felt like I was boiling from the inside.
—"Relax, this is normal," said Kraf.
Normal? I feel like I'm about to explode…
The other scientist jumped in:
—"Kraf, he's exceeding normal levels."
—"What? Are you sure, Makiavelo?"
—"Yes. Every second it rises more and more. His heart is on the brink."
Pain surged through my entire body—muscles, skin, bones. I screamed in agony.
—"Please, Traytros, hang in there," Kraf said with a serious face.
Thomas stepped in:
—"Kraf, you should stop this. His body's not ready."
—"We can't," said Makiavelo. "He's already inside. If we stop, he might die."
Thomas frowned.
—"I don't think so…" Makiavelo said. "Every second, his vitals exceed human limits. Even more than Thomas or Leonidas. He should be dead already."
—"What do you mean, old man?"
—"I mean Traytros could die at any moment."
An alarm went off.
—"Warning. Danger. Warning. Danger."
Thomas shouted:
—"Kraf! What's happening!?"
—"It's getting out of control," Kraf yelled, running alongside Makiavelo to stabilize the machine.
—"It's no use," Makiavelo responded. "There's nothing we can do."
Everything blurred. My chest felt like it would burst. Nausea. Dizziness. Then deep sleep.
Thomas aimed his weapon at the capsule.
Before closing my eyes, I saw Makiavelo leaping at him.
Darkness.
I woke up with a start.
—"What happened!? Where am I!?"
I was in an infirmary. Lying down. Alive.
I tried to get up, but the moment I stepped down, I fell.
—"AH! Why do I feel so weak!?"
A nurse came in.
—"Sir, are you alright? You're not cleared to get up yet."
She helped me sit on the bed.
—"What am I doing here? Who brought me?"
—"You were brought in from the lab. They'll come see you shortly."
—"Who?"
—"Probably Dr. Kraf."
She left. I lay back down. I was sleepy. I could barely move. Completely drained.
A while later, Kraf and Thomas arrived.
—"Looks like you're awake. I'm glad," Kraf said.
Thomas approached.
—"How do you feel?"
—"Okay… but why am I here?"
Kraf paused.
—"Well… it didn't go as expected. We thought you were going to die. Your vitals were through the roof. But surprisingly, you're fine. No side effects. In fact, you came out quite well."
—"I can't even move. Everything hurts. I'm exhausted."
—"That's normal. You'll feel even more drained for now. But based on the stats, your potential surpasses even Thomas or Leonidas. We're not sure by how much yet. Time will tell."
Happy to be alive? So… nobody knew if I would make it.
Thomas smiled.
—"Congratulations. You'll become better than all of us."
Kraf added:
—"Oh, I almost forgot. The president is coming to see you. He wants to meet his new great success."
A few minutes later, the president walked in, flanked by several guards.
—"How's the future commander of the Elite Forces doing?"
I smiled.
—"I'm doing well, sir. Thanks for coming."
I looked at the escorts. They were from Section 0. Their uniforms gave it away. I scanned for Herlin...
She wasn't there.
—"It's normal to feel tired. But once you recover, I have something special for you. So hurry up and get well."
Something important?
—"Well, everything seems fine here. I'll be off. Good job, Dr. Kraf. See you soon."
As they left, two more escorts followed. Among them...
Herlin.
She turned around. Stared directly at me. She froze for a moment.
Did she know she'd see me?
I smiled. She smiled back… and left.
I was exhausted. I fell back asleep.
Days later, I was still tired. But Kraf said I was clear to leave. Time to start moving again.
Thomas came for me.
—"Looks like Makiavelo wants to begin tests soon. But you're not at 100% yet."
—"I can move. That's what matters."
Thomas smiled.
—"Oh, by the way. Looks like you've got fans. Someone left you a letter."
—"A letter? Who?"
—"They just told me to give it to you. Said you'd know who it was."
He dropped me off at my room.
—"You've got the day off. Rest or go out. Tomorrow you're back in action. Enjoy it."
—"Thanks, Thomas."
I sat on the bed. Opened the letter carefully. It read:
"I saw you were in the infirmary. I didn't know why, but I was worried, so I did some digging. Looks like you're a superhuman now. I'm glad it wasn't serious. You're discharged today, so I probably know where you'll be. See you."
To: Traytros
I suppose it was Herlin. Seems nothing escapes her.
But...
Will she come to my room?
Hours later, I was lying down reading a book about World War II.
From what I've read, it was all about personal interests. Hitler twisted his words to sway the people.
"One person alone can't win a war."
Then, a knock at the door.
—"Who could it be?"
I opened the door, and as I did, I saw a familiar silhouette.
—"Herlin?"
Herlin came to visit.
—"Can I come in?" she asked.
I was caught off guard. A bit nervous.
—"Yes, of course. Come in."
She stepped in and began observing my room carefully.
—"Looks like you're comfortable here."
—"Well, it's cozy. Have a seat."
She sat on the table and asked:
—"How are you? Feeling any better?"
My body still ached, but I replied:
—"Yes, I'm fine. I feel both light and heavy at the same time."
—"I think that's part of the process. Your body has to adapt to your new condition."
—"Do you know anything about this?"
—"Yeah. I try to know everything. It's not just about being promoted—you have to survive the incubator."
—"Incubator?"
—"Yes. That's how First Class soldiers are born—or die. If they survive, there's a ceremony. What surprised me is that yours happened beforehand, as if they were sure you'd make it."
I paused. What would've happened if I hadn't survived?
She changed the subject:
—"So, how was your trip to Aroa?"
No use asking how she knew. She finds out everything.
—"Truth is, I didn't really see Aroa. Just the outskirts."
—"I thought you went to the main sectors."
—"We stayed outside. There was an area, like two hours by bike. A mountain, once a lab. Bombed at the war's start. Mostly destroyed."
—"And why did you go there?"
—"We were looking for samples to improve the machine. But that's where it all happened. We found half-eaten corpses. Mutated creatures from the radiation. A soldier died. I didn't know him, but seeing his friend cry… I felt guilty for not saving him. We completed the mission, but days later was his funeral. I couldn't take it. I went and apologized… sorry for bringing this up."
She stood from the table, came closer, and placed her hand on my cheek, looking at me.
—"It's not your fault… these things aren't under our control. It's painful, but that's life. And it makes you human. Not just someone who kills, but someone who wants to help… that's what matters."
Her words made me think of Leonidas. Is that the average soldier's mindset?
—"Thank you. I accepted this upgrade because I hoped to help others."
We fell silent, staring at each other for a few seconds.
I remembered she was going to tell me something last time, but we were interrupted.
—"Herlin, last time we met… you were going to tell me something. What was it?"
She took her hand off my cheek and paced in circles.
—"Oh, that… well…"
She paused and continued:
—"That day I saw you… wasn't the first time. I've been watching you for a while. At first, I thought you were an idiot. I wondered how someone like you was in the Rangers. But after the attack, I saw you were different. You didn't kill for the sake of killing. You only did what was necessary."
She was at the attack too?!
—"We were assigned to protect the president. I was going to intervene when you let that bandit go, but he escaped us too. I acted like I didn't see. When I saw you in the lower city, I confirmed my suspicions."
—"So… you think I'm special?"
—"Mmm… I don't know. But beneath all that armor, you're still human. And in this world… that makes you special, Traytros."
How did we reach a point where being normal is now a miracle? Values have crumbled along with the world. Maybe there's no going back.
—"Herlin, do you want to keep doing what you do?"
She paused.
—"No… but I don't know what else to do."
—"Then why do you keep doing it? Who are you helping? Do you like it? I don't think it's just because it's the only thing you know."
—"And what do you know? Not everyone was born with your privileges. A peaceful zone, support, people who love you… Not all of us had your chance!"
She continued:
—"You don't know what it's like to live without options. The only person who supported you—gone. No choice over your life. People like you think everyone lives the same. The upper class doesn't care who rules; they're always fine."
Ashamed, I apologized:
—"Herlin, I didn't mean… I'm sorry. I didn't know."
I saw a tear roll down her cheek. She was about to cry. I didn't know what to do. So I did what a human would do:
I hugged her.
Pressed her face to my chest and said:
—"It's going to be okay."
She sobbed:
—"Why, Traytros? Why is life so unfair? I just wanted a normal life like other kids… Parents who loved me. Friends. Going out with a boy… If God exists, why does He allow all this…?"
Her crying was intense. It pierced my chest. I wanted to understand her—but I couldn't. I hadn't lived her reality. I had no right to judge.
We sat on the bed. She rested her head on my shoulder.
—"I'm tired. I hadn't had a day for myself in years."
—"You have the day off?"
—"No. I snuck out. But… it was worth it."
I started stroking her head. She fell asleep.
—"Wow… and I was the one who was tired."
All jokes aside, I started thinking. How many stories like Herlin's exist? Many join the military hoping for a better life—or simply because they don't know what else to do.
Whether under communism or capitalism, lives will never be truly equal. That's a fact. But we can make them better.
So many lives like Maikel's are daily bread too.
God… if you really exist… give me a sign of what I should do now.
It was nighttime. I didn't want to wake her. I grabbed a blanket, covered her, and we slept all night.
The next morning, a message came in. I grabbed the phone and read it:
"Hi Traytros. Come to the simulation room. See you there."