"You damn bastard!"
Bound and restrained, Black Zetsu couldn't hold back his fury. "What the hell did that brat Yuto promise you idiots to make you serve him so loyally?"
"Dignity and equality," the spiral-faced White Zetsu replied with a light chuckle. "Things you could never offer."
"???"
Black Zetsu was stunned. "Have you all lost your minds?! You're not even human! Why would you care about that?!"
"We may not be human, but we're people," White Zetsu No. 007 said coolly, standing beside the spiral-faced one. "Unlike you rabid dogs, born only to destroy."
"Huh?!"
Black Zetsu's yellow eyes bulged in disbelief.
"R-Rabid dogs?!"
After a thousand years of tireless effort to revive his mother, this was how he was described? And by a lowly White Zetsu clone, no less!
Unbelievable!
This thing was just a mass of split cells from the original White Zetsu, while he was his mother's own flesh and blood! How dare it?!
"You seem real salty, Black Zetsu," White Zetsu No. 007 sneered, grinning wide. "Why don't you call your mommy over and see if our boss doesn't wipe the floor with her?"
"I don't think the boss would bother," the spiral-faced White Zetsu mused, pausing mid-step. "If she starts crying, it'd just ruin his reputation."
"Yeah, yeah! That's right!" the other White Zetsus chimed in.
"You motherf—"
Black Zetsu was so furious he could feel his (nonexistent) lungs bursting. Since when did these clones develop such a talent for pissing people off?!
"Ooooh, he's mad!"
"HAHAHA! Look at him fume!"
"This is entertaining as hell!"
The White Zetsus cackled in a chorus of mockery, making Black Zetsu's head spin.
"Alright, we're here."
The spiral-faced White Zetsu stopped in front of a cell and swung the door open. "Hope you get along with your new roommate~"
Black Zetsu immediately sensed danger, but before he could protest, the swarm of White Zetsus had already vanished into the prison shadows.
"I've been waiting for you, Zetsu."
A chillingly familiar voice echoed from the darkness. Black Zetsu stiffly turned his head—only to see Obito's twisted, furious face.
"Will Black Zetsu survive this?"
Back in the office, Kushina watched the scene unfold with glee.
"Hard to say. That thing's made of Yin-Yang Release. Killing it isn't easy," Yuto replied calmly. "Unless Obito spontaneously awakens the Rinnegan that is."
"If he still hasn't unlocked it after all this psychological torture, then he's just talentless," Mikoto remarked with exaggerated sarcasm.
"Speaking of torture, you're the real mastermind!" Kushina grinned, nudging her bestie. "Making your son's ex wear a maid outfit and a collar? Brilliant! I never would've thought of that!"
"Just a spur-of-the-moment idea. I thought Izumi would refuse," Mikoto sighed, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "Our family owes her too much."
"Fugaku's parenting was questionable, but your boy's the real problem," Kushina snorted. "Should've taken him to a therapist years ago."
"Oh please, since when does the shinobi world have therapists?" Mikoto rolled her eyes.
Yuto stayed silent, focused on tending to a potted plant on the windowsill.
"You've been fussing over that sapling for two hours now," Kushina whined, draping herself over his shoulders. "You touch it more tenderly than you touch me!"
"PFFT— Kushina, what kind of comparison is that?!" Mikoto nearly spat out her drink.
Yuto's eye twitched. "Sis, that's not a comparison you wanna make. This World Tree (life tree) needs daily care to grow properly."
"So what's it even do?" Kushina poked at the leaves.
"Enhances physical constitution and chakra absorption for everyone in its range," Yuto smirked. "If it matures, every citizen of Wave Country could become a genius."
"Damn, that is a big deal." Kushina nodded sagely. "Fine, I'll generously allow you to take some of my cuddle time and give it to the tree."
Yuto's face went blank. 'This woman…'
Mikoto sighed. "Such magnanimity! But it's a plant, not a new concubine."
"Who knows?" Kushina winked. "If tailed beasts can wear maid outfits, maybe this tree'll join the family too?"
"…Are you talking about White Zetsu now?" Mikoto's jaw dropped.
'What the hell kind of logic is that?!'
Yuto decided it was time to intervene—until a golden prompt suddenly flashed before him.
[CHOOSE.]
[1. Use "Enlightenment" on the World Tree (life tree) and propose to it on the spot!]
[2. Let Kushina write "Fourth Hokage's Wife Was Here" on your pristine, untouched buttocks.]
[3. Gift Obito a very "special" recording of you getting cozy with Rin.]
'What kind of cursed options are these?!'
Option 1—propose to a tree? What if it actually turns into a plant girl?
Option 2—absolutely not. That'd be a permanent mark of shame!
Option 3—instantly rejected. He wouldn't ruin Rin's reputation like that.
After a long pause, Yuto reluctantly chose Option 1.
'Might as well see if this tree really can become a plant girl.'
Taking a deep breath, he activated "Enlightenment".
A radiant glow enveloped the sapling.
Kushina and Mikoto blinked in confusion. "What are you doing?"
After a tense silence… nothing happened. No plant girl emerged.
Relieved, Yuto solemnly lifted a leaf. "Miss World Tree… will you marry me?"
"???"
The two women stared, dumbfounded.
[Congratulations! You've obtained a Mysterious Communicator!]
Yuto looked at the object in his hand—a smartphone.
'You've got to be kidding me.'
Sure, it was "mysterious" in the shinobi world, but in his past life, these were everywhere! Was the system mocking him?!
"Alright, time to go," Yuto announced, opening a dark portal.
"Hold on—what was that just now?!"
"If our ghostly forms aren't enough for you, must you resort to flora?!"
"It's a curse, I swear!"
Amid the chaos, the portal closed behind them.
Yet, moments after they left… the World Tree's branches twitched.
A crimson eye opened on its bark.
"My name isn't 'Miss World Tree,' husband…"
A hauntingly ethereal voice echoed through the empty office.
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