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Eldritch Horror? No, I'm A Doctor
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The screaming finally stopped.
Ren pulled his palm away from the Colonel's eye socket, the needle thin tongues retracting back into the mouth before it sealed shut. His hand looked completely normal again, just regular skin and fingers. He pulled his glove back on with efficiency.
Colonel Steven Bright lay on the examination table, chest heaving. His breathing came in ragged gasps, each one sounding like he'd just finished sprinting a marathon. Sweat covered his face, dripping down his temples and soaking into the collar of his uniform.
"Okay, done with the diagnosis," Ren said, his voice matter of fact through the black mask. He stepped back from the table and crossed his arms.
"You have a missing eye with thick scar tissue, a broken ankle, some broken ribs, and various minor injuries."
"Hah... hah... hah..." The Colonel was still panting, his good eye unfocused and staring at the ceiling.
"The cost of getting a new eye will be..." Ren paused, considering.
Hmm, how much should I ask for? he thought.
The System's response came immediately in his mind, appearing as text rather than voice.
Whatever you want, but don't set it too low. Professional treatment requires proper payment.
From now on, I'll charge one million dollars per limb, so...
"The total is 1.1 million dollars," Ren announced.
"Hah... hah... hah..." The Colonel's breathing was still heavy, his chest rising and falling rapidly.
"What the fuck was that?" Colonel Steven finally managed to speak between gasps. His voice was hoarse from all the screaming.
"That was so fucking unsettling. I can still feel it crawling under my skin."
"That's the standard diagnosis process," Ren replied calmly, as if people reacted this way all the time.
The Colonel's face turned bright red. Not from exertion, but from pure shame. The flush started at his neck and spread upward, covering his cheeks and forehead until he looked like he'd been sunburned.
After I acted all cool about understanding how his horror appearance makes him feel like an odd one out, I just fucking screamed at him, the Colonel thought miserably.
Fuck. I want to dig a hole and bury myself.
He covered his face with both hands, trying to hide the embarrassment. His shoulders hunched forward, making him look smaller on the examination table.
Ren watched this display with mild interest. The tough military officer was now hiding his face like a schoolboy who'd been caught doing something embarrassing.
"Well," Ren said, "I can probably cure your eye. But do you want to experience something else?"
The Colonel's hands lowered slightly, revealing one eye peeking through his fingers.
"What is it?"
His interest was clearly piqued despite the lingering embarrassment. Ren could see the shift in his posture, the way he leaned forward slightly.
"If I have the right ingredient, I can make you stronger."
"What?" The Colonel's hands dropped completely, sitting up straighter on the table.
"Is it real?"
"If it's not real, why would I tell you?" Ren's tone carried a hint of exasperation.
"Do you have the power to increase hunter rank?"
"No, it's not that." Ren shook his head, the black beak of his mask moving side to side.
"But I think I can add a new skill to your arsenal."
The Colonel went very still. His single eye widened, and his whole body tensed like a wire pulled taut.
For hunters, rank was everything. And in the Azareth Empire, rank meant position. If your power was proven, you could move up in rank. Although the merit system still existed, it only counted for about thirty percent. Most of the high ranking officers were from the younger generation because of awakened ranks and the grueling process required to advance.
For a middle aged hunter like him, if he advanced to S rank now, the process of Second Awakening would have a ninety eight percent chance of killing him. His body was too old, too set in its ways. The transformation would tear him apart from the inside.
But a new skill? That could change everything. Skills were power. Skills were survival. Skills were the difference between life and death in high rank gates.
"How much?" The Colonel's voice was intense, urgent. He leaned forward on the table, his whole body radiating desperation. "I'm willing to pay anything. Everything!"
His eye was full of something that looked almost like madness. The desperation of a soldier who'd seen too many comrades die and knew his own time was running out.
Ren felt a chill run down his spine. The intensity was unsettling, even for someone used to dealing with desperate patients.
"First, let me say it like this," Ren held up one hand, trying to calm the situation.
"I can transplant and modify your body with materials that have supernatural qualities. Like monster parts, items, and so on."
The Colonel's eye became dim. The light that had been burning there a moment ago faded, replaced by disappointment and something that looked like bitter recognition. His shoulders sagged.
"Huh. So just like those alchemist bastards bragging," the Colonel muttered. He leaned back on the table, his posture deflating.
"Look, if you're gonna scam me, just stop. I guess I looked at you the wrong way. I thought you'd be better."
Ren tilted his head, confused. "What's that supposed to mean? What does this have to do with alchemists?"
"Huh?" The Colonel looked at the strange doctor wearing the black plague doctor mask. His expression showed genuine surprise.
"You really don't know?"
"Yes. Am I supposed to know? Is it a common thing?"
"Well, it's not that common knowledge, I suppose." The Colonel rubbed his face with one hand, suddenly looking much older.
"But a couple of groups know about it."
He sat up again, his posture more guarded now. His voice took on a lecturing tone, like he was explaining something obvious to a recruit.
"The normal monster infusion is a normal technique. The Chimera Alchemists use it like human experimentation. Most of their research results will be in the form of downgraded humans."
Ren leaned against the counter, crossing his arms. "Downgraded how?"
The Colonel's expression darkened. "They lose their intelligence. Their humanity. Some can only speak one word, maybe two if you're lucky." He paused, his jaw clenching. His hand gripped the edge of the examination table.
"There was this girl. Young, maybe five. Her family was desperate for money, so they sold her to the alchemists for experimentation."
Ren stayed quiet, listening. He could see the tension in the Colonel's body, the way his fingers were turning white from gripping the table.
"They fused her with a wolf type monster. High quality fusion, they said. She'd gain enhanced senses, strength, speed. Everything a hunter needed." The Colonel's voice was bitter now, carrying years of anger.
"You know what she got instead?"
"What?"
"She can only say one word now. Just one." The Colonel's hand clenched into a fist on his lap.
"Ed...win. Ed...win." His voice cracked slightly on the name.
"That's her best friend's name. The boy who tried to stop the procedure. She just keeps saying his name over and over, like her brain got stuck on that one memory."
"What the fuck?" Ren's voice came out quiet, genuine horror seeping through despite the mask.
"That's disturbing."
"Yeah." The Colonel nodded slowly, his eye distant. "That's the alchemists' reputation when it comes to monsters. They promise power and deliver monsters. Not the good kind. The kind that makes you wish you'd just stayed weak." He looked back at Ren.
"So you'll forgive me for being skeptical when you offer the same thing."
Ren pushed off from the counter and walked closer to the table.
"Well, let me reassure you."
The Colonel looked up at him, skeptical but listening. His posture was still guarded, defensive.
"First, my skill is nothing like that." Ren's voice was firm, confident.
"My skill is a bit special, you see. And I can make the appearance not too noticeable too. I can say for certain that your intelligence will remain intact. You'll still be yourself."
"Hmm." The Colonel seemed to be in deep contemplation. His eye studied Ren's masked face, trying to determine if he was telling the truth.
"And how can you guarantee that?"
"Because my skill operates on a completely different principle," Ren explained.
"I'm not mixing your DNA with a monster's. I'm grafting specific parts with specific functions while maintaining your core self. Think of it like... replacing a car part. The car is still the same car, just with a better component."
The Colonel's eye narrowed. "That's a very simplified explanation."
"Would you prefer the technical version?" Ren asked.
"Because I can go into detail about spiritual foundation preservation, consciousness anchoring, and identity matrix stabilization if you want."
"No." The Colonel held up his hand.
"I get the point. You're saying it's surgical integration rather than genetic fusion."
"Exactly."
"If you're not that confident," Ren offered,
"I can start with something small. Like your hand. But the appearance will change quite a bit. It'll still resemble a human hand if the ingredient is right."
"No." The Colonel shook his head firmly.
"How about my eye instead? The one that's missing. If you can create an artificial one and connect it to my optic nerve, it'll be good. If something goes wrong, I can just gouge it out again." He touched the empty socket briefly.
"I won't lose anything I didn't already lose."
Huh. This old man is the real tough man, huh? Ren thought, impressed despite himself. The logic was sound. The Colonel was willing to gamble, but he was choosing the safest gamble available.
"If the ingredient is right, I think I can do it." Ren nodded.
"Do you have a monster part on you?"
The Colonel smiled. It was the first genuine smile Ren had seen from him since he'd entered the clinic. He reached into his inventory, and there was a flash of light.
The Skinless King's head materialized on the examination table.
Ren looked at it. The skull was still intact, bleached white bone with empty eye sockets. Frost clung to the surface, not melting despite the room temperature. The teeth were still sharp, still formed from ice.
"The boss from earlier," the Colonel said.
"Figured if anything's going to give me power, it should be this bastard."
"Hmm. It doesn't have eyeballs though," Ren observed, circling around to look at the skull from different angles.
"Can you work with it?" The Colonel asked.
He closed his eyes, reaching into the knowledge the Grotesque Gospel of Grafted Evolution had implanted in his head. Information flooded through him, techniques and methods he hadn't known moments ago. His consciousness sifted through the data, searching for specific procedures.
Images flashed through his mind. Ways to extract essence from bone. Methods to craft organs from elemental material. Techniques for binding artificial constructs to living nerves. The knowledge was there, complete and detailed.
Huh. There really is a method to create artificial organs.
Ren opened his eyes.
"Okay. Now it's two million dollars. You can pay after the operation. Cash or card, both are okay."
"Why has it gotten more expensive?" The Colonel's eyebrow raised, his tone suspicious.
"Because the transplant and artificial organ crafting have been added." Ren held up two fingers.
"Normally, I plan to charge two million per modification. But you're my first patient for this, so I'll discount it to 900,000 dollars."
The Colonel felt like he was being ripped off. His eye narrowed, and he could feel his wallet crying somewhere in the distance. But what choice did he have? This was his one chance at gaining real power without risking death through Second Awakening.
"Ah, fuck it." The Colonel waved his hand in resignation. "What would I have to lose? I've lived long enough."
Ren felt offended. Did this guy think I'll kill him or something? How rude.
Before he could voice his irritation, a System window opened in his vision.
╔═══════════════════════════════════════╗
║ SYSTEM NOTIFICATION
╠═══════════════════════════════════════╣
║
║ Would you like to spend
║ $1,000,000 to open a new area?
║
║ Currently Suggested:
║ ▸ GRAFTING ROOM
║
║ [YES] [NO]
╚═══════════════════════════════════════╝
What new area? Ren thought. All conversations with the System happened in his mind, invisible to the Colonel who was still lying on the examination table.
Another window appeared with more details.
╔═══════════════════════════════════════╗
║ GRAFTING ROOM
╠═══════════════════════════════════════╣
║
║ EFFECTS:
║ • Reduce grafting failure by 50%
║ • Sterile environment optimized
║ for eldritch reconstruction
║ 30% chance of acquire a skill 1 rank above the Item
║ • Automatic material preservation
║ • Enhanced surgical precision +20%
║ • Patient stabilization field
║
║ COST: $1,000,000
╚═══════════════════════════════════════╝
You and your timing, Ren thought bitterly. I just got the money. Now I have to spend it.
Would you prefer a more failure rate on your first grafting procedure? The Colonel seems like such a nice man. It would be a shame if his head exploded.
That's not funny.
I thought it was hilarious. Imagine the splash. Comedic gold.
You're terrible human being. No should I say terrible machine?
I prefer "pragmatic." Besides, you need this room. Unless you want to explain to the military why their Colonel returned as a vegetable.
Fine. But this better be worth it.
Oh, it will be. Trust me.
I don't trust you at all.
And yet you're still going to buy it. Funny how that works.
Fuck it. Ren mentally pressed the upgrade button with more force than necessary, as if pressing harder would make his irritation more clear to the System.
Done. The new area has opened. The door is at the far end of that dark hallway. Enjoy the view!
What's that supposed to mean?
You'll see.
"Wait here for a moment," Ren said to the Colonel, his voice perhaps more strained than before.
"I need to check something."
"Sure," the Colonel replied, still lying on the examination table.
"Take your time. I'm not going anywhere."
Ren walked to the operating room door and stepped out into the main hallway. He turned left, and his steps slowed immediately.
There was a new hallway. One that definitely hadn't been there before.
It stretched into darkness, the black walls seeming to absorb what little light reached them. The air felt different here, colder somehow. At the far end, barely visible through the shadows, something glowed with a faint red light.
What the fuck?
Ren took a few more steps forward, his footsteps echoing in the oppressive silence. The further he walked, the more details became visible.
The glow resolved into a door.
A deep crimson red door, the color of fresh blood. Not paint red. Blood red. The kind of red that made your brain immediately register danger. Red mist curled out from underneath it, spreading across the floor like something alive. The walls around it were stained with darker patches that looked disturbingly organic, as if the hallway itself was bleeding. A single light fixture hung above, casting everything in a red glow that would make any horror movie director weep with joy.
Ren stopped walking. He just stood there, staring down the hallway at the door.
That can't be real.
He blinked.
The door was still there. Still looking like the entrance to a serial killer's basement.
He blinked again, harder this time, squeezing his eyes shut for a full second.
The door remained. Completely unchanged. Mocking him with its existence.
You've got to be kidding me.
What? It's very professional.
Professional for WHAT? A horror movie set?
I prefer to think of it as "atmospheric." It sets the right mood for the procedure.
The right mood for WHAT? Traumatizing patients before they even enter?
They're already traumatized. You stuck your palm mouth thingy in their eye socket. The door is the least of their concerns.
There's RED MIST coming from under it!
Climate control. Very important for grafting procedures. The room needs specific humidity levels to prevent tissue rejection.
The walls look like they're BLEEDING!
Artistic texturing. Very avant-garde. I consulted several interior design databases.
You consulted with who a fucking HORROR MOVIE director!
Potato, potato. Same difference.
Those words are pronounced the same!
Are they? Huh. Anyway, the door is perfectly functional.
Ren closed his eyes, took a deep breath through his mask's filters, and opened them again.
The door was still there.
Red and Still shrouded in mist that moved like it was alive.
Still the most horror movie thing he'd ever seen in his life, and he'd fought the Avatar of a Skin God.
This came straight out of a horror movie. Like, shot for shot. I'm half expecting a jump scare.
Would you like me to add one? I could program something to leap out when you open the door. Maybe a skeleton? Or tentacles? I could do tentacles. You seem to like tentacles.
NO.
Your loss. It would have been very entertaining.
For WHO?
For me, obviously. Do you know how boring it is being a disembodied system consciousness? This is the most fun I've had in... well, ever, actually.
You've only existed for like a month or two.
Exactly. A very long, boring month. Let me have this.
Ren stared at the door, his mind trying to process what he was seeing. The red glow seemed to pulse slightly, like a heartbeat. The mist swirled in patterns that were almost hypnotic.
Is it supposed to pulse like that?
Probably not. But it adds to the ambiance, don't you think?
No!
Agree to disagree.
Can I at least get a normal colored door?
No refunds. No exchanges. All sales final.
I hate everything about this.
But you're still going to use it. Because you need that 50% failure reduction. And you know it.
Ren did know it. The Colonel was his first grafting patient. The procedure was experimental. Without that reduced failure rate, there was a very real chance something could go wrong. Horribly wrong. Exploding head wrong.
Fine. But I'm filing a complaint.
With who? Yourself? I'm part of you. This is your system.
Then I'm filing a complaint with corporate.
You ARE corporate. You're the entire company. CEO, employee, and janitor all in one.
Then I'm quitting.
You can't quit. We're soul bound. Till death do us part. Or beyond death, actually. The contract is very thorough.
Ren wanted to argue more, but what was the point? The door existed. It was horrifying. And he was going to use it anyway because the alternative was potentially killing a patient.
I am fucked.
Yep! Welcome to your new life! Enjoy the red door!