Five
Extract: Chiefs and the Rest, Act 6 scene 3 & 4 (unpublished)
Seme - crown Prince
Khumo/Mr. Fox - Seme's younger brother, pimp, Mafia boss
Thabiso - Seme's bodyguard, Charlie's secret friend
Charlie/Bera (Bear) - Khumo's bodyguard, right-hand man, Thabiso's secret friend
Nanette/Anita - Seme's chambermaid with a hidden face and secret identity
Pula - Botswana currency (100$ = approximately P1,600 #I suck at math)
SCENE
The Prodigal Son Empire… 8:57 PM.
Khumo: I need to find a way to get back at that bastard for taking my nine million.
Charlie: (Blinks in confusion) But, Sir. I thought you were past the whole thing.
Khumo: (Peevishly) Damn it, Bera! You know I never get over anything! (Pushes Sesame off and stands up from the couch) He cost me millions from my Empire, I can't just let that go.
Charlie: (Sighs deeply) Right… (Swallows) Yeah, about those packages you sent…
Khumo: (Suddenly brightens) The packages! Oh, Bera, how did that go? Did my friends Radebe, Harrison and Sogotlo get their goods?
Charlie: Uh, yes, Sir. Mr. Radebe received ninety kilos of cocaine and twelve-hundred grams of Khat. Mr. Sogotlo got his eighty kilos of crack and seventy-eight kilos of marijuana. Mr. Harrison got himself his six hundred packs of Yuroyuki CPF3.
Khumo: (Beams) Good, Bera. That's incredibly good. (Settles back down on the couch and gets enveloped by the five bikini wearing girls) Business… is booming.
Charlie: (Hesitates) …You sure it was a wise idea to give Harrison that much amount of the new stuff, Sir?
Khumo: (Grins) Peter Harrison is my favorite of the three douche bags. I trust he will handle them out like a professional… (Smirks) Well, I mean I don't trust him – or any of those a-holes but he is a smart man. He can handle it. Don't worry your pretty face, Bera. (Turns to Sesame) Be a good girl and play with your sisters for me. (Pushes all the girls off the couch)
Sesame: (Looking a bit caught off guard) Okay… (Suddenly smiles and bites her lower lip)
The five girls, all wearing bras and G-string panties come to stand in front of the large square table. Khumo orders the guards move the rest of the couches to the sides and make more space for them. They start entertaining the men. They caress each other's bodies on the floor, kissing and moaning. They slap each other's buttocks and squeal in delight. They even squeeze each other's breasts and gasp erotically. The other four guards start swallowing in lust and desire.
Khumo whistles at the five girls and gestures to his men. The girls break up their pack and each choose a guard to seduce.
Girl: (Grabs guard by the collar) Come here, tiger.
The guard smiles impishly as the girl pushes him onto the couch and sits on his lap.
Khumo: (Smirks) Give my boys some snacks. They deserve it.
The rest of the guards are apprehended by the half-naked women who start squirming and moaning and… stuff… only the guard Charlie is left facing Sesame.
Sesame: (Playfully) Let's play, cutie. (Calls him with a finger, another one running down her chest)
Charlie solemnly shakes his head.
Khumo: What's wrong, Bera? You don't want some food?
Charlie: No. (Clears his throat) I'm good. (Looks away from the prince)
Khumo: (Frowns) Well! (To Sesame) Come to papa, sweet cheeks.
Sesame catwalks to Khumo and sits on his lap the way a child would on their parent's lap and pouts.
Khumo: You sure you don't want this ass, Bera? (Grabs Sesame's buttock) Because it sure wants you.
Sesame giggles.
Charlie uncomfortably scratches his forehead and swallows before straightening.
Khumo: (Disappointed) Well. Suit yourself, bruh. (Turns to the guards) Make sure you tip them right.
The guards instantly brighten. They jump to their feet with the girls in their hands and carry them off to the Kitty Box.
Khumo: (To Sesame) Go put on some clothes. Bera says you're repulsive. (Pushes Sesame off and smacks her bare butt cheek)
The girl comes to stare up at Charlie who nonchalantly stares down at her with his masked face aimed forward, and then walks out of the room. Only Khumo and Charlie are now left.
Khumo: (Pats the couch) Sit your ass down.
Charlie obediently comes and settles at the other end of the red couch, eyes lowered.
Charlie: Sir?
Khumo: What's with you? I give you my girl and you refuse her. What are you – saving yourself for marriage?
Charlie: No, Sir.
Khumo: You didn't like her ass? Or do you perhaps prefer a dude's ass? (Bursts out laughing and slaps a knee)
Charlie gives him a horrified look.
Khumo: (Stops laughing) Come on! I'm joking. (Prods Charlie's shoulder) You don't have to be so rigid all the time. (Wraps his arm around Charlie's shoulder) So, who is the lucky – or should I say – unlucky girl?
Charlie: (Frowns) Sir!
Khumo: Hey, I'm simply curious as to why you're refusing my girls when you know they're the best around. Is your girl better?
Charlie opens his mouth to say something before his phone buzzes in his pocket. He takes it out, looks at the screen and his eyes widen.
Charlie: (Whispers) Crap!
Khumo: Ooh! Is that a text from your girlfriend? Lemme see.
Charlie: (Springs to his feet) Uh, it's nothing, Sir!
Message from Thabiso: [Hey, dude! Yo, dude?! Bro! Ey! Ayo, chump!]
Charlie ignores it and sighs, rolling his eyes.
Another message alert pops in, followed by another and another and another.
Khumo: Hm! Persistent. I like.
Charlie: (Walks off with wide eyes) Shit! Crap, crap, crap!
The phone rings. Charlie freezes.
Khumo: (Takes out his own phone) Are you gonna get that?
Charlie: Eventually, Sir. (Swipes the screen and puts the phone to his ear) What!? (Clears his throat)
Thabiso'svoice: (Sounding slightly shocked) Who pissed in your boots?
Charlie: (Hisses) What's with the million texts, huh? I'm at work!
Thabiso'svoice: Sorry. It's Fortnite night. When are you knocking off tonight? Or did you forget our regular plans?
Charlie: No I didn't forget our regular plans! (Glances at Khumo) In an hour, possibly.
Thabiso'svoice: I'll come pick you up then.
Charlie: (Eyes widening) No, no! I'll come to you. I'm at work.
Thabiso'svoice: Right. Is Prince Khumo with you?
Charlie: (Looking up) Yeah. Where's your burden?
Thabiso'svoice: (Sounding carefree) Oh, Prince Seme is moping in his room. Went to bed early. I'm bored. Get your ass here.
Charlie: (Wipes a hand down his face) Hey, you know how hectic my job is.
Khumo: (Sniggering) She's an unpleasant one.
Thabiso'svoice: Was that your prince?
Charlie: Yep!
Thabiso: Why didn't you take the call outside?
Charlie: Not allowed. Okay, listen. I'll meet you in an hour. Then we'll play.
Thabiso'svoice: You're buying the data.
Charlie: No, c'mon! I paid for last time! Ugh, fine. Later. (Hangs up. Locks the phone and turns to Prince Khumo) I'm done!
Khumo: Good! Then you're dismissed.
Charlie: (Startled) Sir?
Khumo: Go and hook up with your girl, Charlie. How often do you have sex with her?
Charlie: (Blushes awkwardly) Not often… Sir.
Khumo: Tell you what? You go take your girl to dinner as she wants now, and I'll stay here in the empire all night. It's okay. Go, enjoy your night. You deserve it. (Grins)
Charlie: (Hesitates) All right, Sir. (Turns around, smirks, and walks off)
On his way out of the private room, he meets and passes by Sesame who wears a pink mask, a loose black vest and short blue jeans.
Sesame: Where's he off to in a hurry?
Khumo: Booty call.
Sesame: Wow! Bera has a girlfriend?
Khumo: (Snorts) And he's complaining about paying for dinner.
Sesame: Like, really?
Khumo: Yeah. It's funny I never took him for a relationship kind of guy. I always thought he liked the hit-and-run game!
Sesame: (Sits on Khumo's lap, facing him) Well, can we have our own party too?
Khumo: You know it. (Kisses her)
They start vigorously kissing on the couch, Khumo squeezing her breasts. She tries to take off his mask.
Khumo: (Snatches her wrists) Sorry, baby girl. That's a million pula face that's gotten many killed.
Sesame: (Pouts) Oh…
SCENE 2
Seme's bedroom. 05:40 AM.
Seme rolls over to his side under the covers and opens his eyes to see Nanette's big eyes a few centimeters from him.
Seme: (Yells) Ah! What are you doing here?
Nanette: (Flinches back) My Lord… you scared me…
Seme: (Scrambles to sit up) What?! You're the one getting up in my face with your creepy masked face!
Nanette: (Bows her head in pain) That hurts my feelings…
Seme: (Bluntly) What do I care? (Stubbornly looks away)
Nanette: (Bites her trembling lower lip) His Majesty was having a bad dream. I just… wanted to see if you were okay… (Pulls her bonnet over her eyebrows)
Seme: (Frowns at her for a second. Blinks) Yeah… I was having a bad dream. (Blushes angrily) But it was just a dream!
He throws the blankets off and rises from the bed in grey three-quarter pajama shorts, morning wood furious.
Seme: (Walking past Nanette) Is my water ready?
Nanette: (Hesitates) …Yes – but it's not your bath time yet.
Seme: (Stops. Glares) Excuse me, is this you telling me what to do?
Nanette: (Flinches and bows) No, Sir. I… I spoke out of turn. (Trembles)
Seme: (Narrows his eyes before rolling them) Ugh, Nanette. I'm already awake. What's the harm in me bathing now?
The girl hugs herself and shakes her head. This drives a somewhat guilty needle into Seme's heart. He grits his teeth, approaches her, takes her by the shoulders and tightly hugs her from behind.
Nanette: (Squeals in terror) What are you doing?
Seme: (Feeling awkward) I'm making my chambermaid feel better. (Hugs her even tighter)
Nanette: (Feels his morning boner) Leave me!
She slips out of his weird embrace and shoots him an outraged look.
Seme: (Embarrassed and pretending to be insulted) Well, then! Fine! Be miserable. See if I care. (Walks to the bathroom)
He enters before banging the door closed. A second later, he opens the door and leans out looking foolish.
Seme: (Darting his eyes around) By the way… happy birthday, Nanette. (Clenches his jaws and shuts the door behind him)
Nanette: (Wide-eyed) What?
How did she forget that today was her birthday? No, more importantly, how did Prince Lekau-Seme know it was her birthday? Did he read that from her diary? If so, what else did he read?
A few torturous minutes later, the handsome, tall, and dark prince comes out of the bathroom in a white gown, white polyester underpants holding him tightly. The morning wood is gone but Nanette keeps her sights lowered just in case. She is subconscious of him moving around her. She sits kneeling at her floor table, eyes wide and trembling. He comes to the wardrobe beside her and picks out a comb from the jillions of them and thrusts it in his short wet hair. Putting his hand inside a drawer, he comes out with a black, mathematical set sized box and hands it to her.
She cautiously receives it, eying it with interest and trepidation then sets it on her lap.
Seme: (Almost awkwardly) It's your birthday gift. You can open it now or later if you want – I don't care.
But the look on his face makes her suspect he does. She looks at the box for a second, imagining what could be held inside this smart little case. Finally, she pushes the case's insides out like how you would a matchbox then almost gets a heart attack. There, glinting on a black cushion, a pair of teardrop shaped diamond earrings and a teardrop diamond necklace stare back at her.
Nanette: (Shoots her face up to him) What are these?!
Seme: (Points to his neck and ears) For you when you finally decide to remove that thing on your face. (Fights back a smile) I'm sure you don't look that bad.
Nanette: (In innocent awe) These must be… worth thousands.
Seme: (Sheepishly) Hundreds of thousands, actually. (Frowns) 700K…
Nanette: (Gawps at him) Why would you use that much to buy me a present, Sir?
Seme: (Wrinkles his nose and bites down on the comb) Do I need a reason to be generous? You're right, then. I did waste my money. Fine. Give them back since you don't want them—
Nanette: No! (Freezes and blushes. Meekly) Thank you… (Bows her head)
Seme: (Coughs dryly) It was nothing. I'm rich.
Nanette: (Inside her head) Yes, you are… so amazing… (Stares at the earrings and necklace, sniffles and eventually cries) Nyeee...
Seme: (Shocked) Wh-what are you doing? Crying again?
Nanette: (Splutters) I… I… I have never been given a gift before. (Cries out loud) Wahhh!
Seme: Whoa, hey! Stop that before you wake the whole palace. Don't you have a button to stop yourself from crying all the time?
Far from this, inside Thabiso's room…
It's been almost fifteen minutes since Thabiso and Charlie started playing Mortal Kombat. Thabiso wins another round.
Charlie: (Sighs and scratches himself inside his tracksuit) This is ridiculous.
Thabiso: I win again. You owe me fifty pula, son.
Charlie: What? I don't owe you fifty pula!
Thabiso: (Calmly) We played four more games before this and you lost each. We'd a bet of ten pula on each round and all those plus this one is equal to fifty pula.
Charlie: No! You cheated on those other rounds.
Thabiso: (Scoffs) Cheated? More like you're weak combatant.
Charlie: (Stands up and tosses the pad aside) You take that back! My combat skills are pretty decent.
Thabiso: (Mutters) Pretty decent? More like pretty sad. (Looks up to see Charlie glaring at him) What?
Charlie: You're a bad sport.
Thabiso: What?
Charlie: And you're a bad friend. I should just snitch on you right now. (Stands in the middle of the room and starts yelling) BAD FRIEND ALERT!!
Thabiso: Shut the hell up and act your age! (Grabs Charlie's pants and pulls him down)
Charlie: (Slouches and cringes) Argh! You grabbed my fucking dick!
Thabiso: (Startled) No the fuck I didn't! (Looks over cautiously)
Charlie: (Buries his face in the side of the bed and groans) First you cheat, insult my combat skills, now you grab my pride and joy – you're just taking advantage of my friendship, man. I might as well moan like a girl for you. (Moans lewdly) Ahh…
Thabiso: (Panics) Wait—shut up, idiot!
They both shoot to their feet.
Charlie: (Laughs) Is this how you want me, Thabi? As a submissive bitch? I'll spread my legs for ya and moan, ah… ah, fuck! Too deep! Ah, Thabi! Ah!
Thabiso jumps and tackles Charlie and they fall onto the bed.
Thabiso: Shut up, shut up, shut up! (Covers Charlie's mouth) What if someone outside hears you making those damn sounds, you asshole?!
Charlie: (Laughing through Thabiso's hand. Wiggles his mouth free) Then they'll hear me say, ah… Ah! Thabi! Just like that! Harder!
Outside the door, a dozen guards are passing by when they hear male voices clashing.
Charlie'svoice: Yes! Oh, fuck! More! More, daddy! More! Ah!
Thabiso'svoice: Don't shout so loud!
The guard in the front signals to the others and they all run back the way they came.
In the room, Thabiso turns Charlie onto his belly and pulls his arm back, threatening to break it.
Thabiso: Quit shouting shit, jackass!
Charlie: (Cackling) Oh, now we're talking! I love back shots! Whoo!
Thabiso, left with nothing to do, lets go of Charlie's arm and pushes him off the bed. Charlie falls with a loud thud onto the floor.
Charlie: (Stops laughing and holds his elbow) Ah, shit! Damnit! (Rubs his shoulder) Ouch…
Thabiso: (Clucks his tongue and sits down) You asshole. You owe me two hundred for that.
Charlie: (Frowns) You didn't have to push me off the bed, y'know.
Thabiso: I hate you.
Charlie: I hate you too.
They pout.