Leon had been wandering outside for quite a while.
By the time he got back to the castle, it was already dinnertime.
At the Gryffindor table, Leon ran into Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan.
He thought he'd finally get a chance to chat with his fellow Irishman.
But Dean, well, he could talk.
Probably because he'd finally found another West Ham United fan at Hogwarts.
Once he started on football, there was no stopping him.
"This is our year! Ever since Coach Bonds took over, the Hammers have been smashing it! We're definitely getting promoted to the Premier League by the end of the season!"
Dean's passionate speech finally hit a pause.
Leon played along enthusiastically:
"Give it a few days, and I'll have my family send me some West Ham news. We can go over it together."
Seamus, sitting nearby, chimed in:
"I mean, I know a bit about Muggle stuff—my dad's a Muggle, you know. But football? No thanks. Leon, how do you find it fun watching twenty people chase one ball? And they're not even allowed to fly!"
"Hey!" Dean shot back, clearly offended.
Leon quickly played peacemaker:
"Football and Quidditch are both great, yeah? Each has its own charm!"
Out of nowhere, Colin Creevey popped up beside Leon, as he often did, and asked curiously:
"Leon, are you a half-blood? How do you, er…"
How was he both a wealthy wizard and so clued in about Muggle stuff?
Colin fumbled his words, but Leon got the gist.
Leon pinned the wealth on his mum, Maeve, explaining she was a rich witch, too busy with work to raise him properly.
Since they lived in a Muggle town and blended in as Muggles, Leon had gone to a Muggle primary school. He even had a graduation certificate to prove it.
As they chatted, the table filled up with dinner.
The Great Hall got busier, with more people coming in to eat and others leaving after finishing.
Leon spotted Harry, Ron, and Hermione arriving late.
"Hey! Harry! Ron! Hermione! Over here!" Leon called them over.
As they got closer, he noticed they looked absolutely wrecked.
Hair a mess, robes filthy, expressions dazed and exhausted.
"Whoa, what happened to you lot? Been wrestling a troll or something?" Leon asked, resisting the urge to cast a cleaning charm on them.
"Don't ask," Ron muttered weakly, slumping down and grabbing a chicken leg, shoving it in his mouth like he hadn't eaten in days.
Harry looked just as bad, managing only one word—"Lockhart"—before diving into the food.
Hermione was in slightly better shape but still prioritized eating before explaining.
"There was a bit of an… incident in Defense Against the Dark Arts this afternoon. Everyone else bolted, but Professor Lockhart gave the three of us a chance to get some 'practical experience.'"
Ron lifted his head from his soup, indignant.
"Practical experience? Lockhart didn't teach us a thing! He just left us to deal with a bunch of chaos-causing critters, as bad as Peeves!"
Seamus, overhearing, gaped.
"What? You three didn't escape? And you got stuck cleaning up his mess?"
Leon leaned in, curious. "What happened? Spill the details!"
Seamus and Dean exchanged a glance and burst out laughing.
Once they calmed down, Dean explained with a sneer:
"Lockhart's a complete fraud. In Defense Against the Dark Arts today, he didn't teach us anything proper—not even the word 'magic.' First, he made us fill out a ridiculous quiz about his favorite color or whatever. Then he let loose a cage of Cornish Pixies. Total chaos. Loads of people got hurt—Neville ended up dangling from the chandelier! Lockhart didn't cast a single spell. The pixies snatched his wand and chucked it out the window. Even Quirrell last year was more competent."
Ron added, "All those amazing stories in his books? It's just him talking. No one can prove he actually did any of it."
Harry was kinder but still critical. "Whatever the case, he shouldn't have run off, leaving the pixies and injured students behind."
Hermione, now too annoyed to eat, jumped to Lockhart's defense.
"That's not fair! You lot haven't even read his books properly. If you did, you wouldn't say that. How could he write such vivid stories without real experiences?"
"I've got an idea!" Leon interjected suddenly.
All eyes turned to him.
"I've got a way to find out if Lockhart's got any real skill."
"Tell us! What's the plan?" they urged.
Leon didn't beat around the bush.
"We get Snape and Lockhart to duel."
The group exchanged looks, then turned back to Leon, waiting for more.
Leon didn't sugarcoat it:
"I'm picking Snape because the other professors are too classy—they'd never stoop to brawling with a colleague. Snape, though? He won't hold back. If they fight, we'll see exactly what Lockhart's capable of."
Brilliant!
It was like Mrs. Norris tackling Professor McGonagall—pure genius!
Everyone except Hermione cheered the idea.
The only problem? Pulling it off would be tricky.
"How do we make them fight?" they all wondered, almost in unison.
Their eyes landed back on Leon, who looked smug, clearly already cooking up a plan.
They pressed him to spill.
Channeling his inner Slytherin cunning, Leon broke it down:
"Gilderoy Lockhart is a textbook narcissist. He's obsessed with his appearance—hair always shiny, teeth sparkling, skin glowing, and he never wears the same outfit twice. So, he's likely got expertise in beauty, haircare, dental care, or fashion. And judging by his popularity, his taste isn't half bad. Plus, he's shameless enough to make all his books required reading to boost sales. That screams greed."
Leon raised a hand to stop Hermione, who was itching to argue, and continued.
"Combine those traits, and I'd bet he's launched some kind of beauty or haircare product, maybe even a clothing or dental brand."
He turned to Hermione, who'd been trying to cut in.
"With Lockhart's style, he's probably mentioned his brand in his books a ton. Hermione, you've got a great memory—what is it?"
Before she could answer, the others were already marveling.
"Blimey, Leon, you're a genius! How'd you figure that out?"
"Yeah, he did mention something in class today."
"Wasn't it a haircare brand?"
Hermione, clearly annoyed, gave the precise answer: "It's his namesake line of haircare potions."
She quickly added, "But that's just his personal interest! It doesn't mean Professor Lockhart isn't capable!"
Leon, thrilled with the confirmation, ignored her mood.
"Perfect! Haircare products will work even better for this!"
But he noticed more and more eyes in the Great Hall turning their way.
"This plotting session's got to wrap up," he said. "We can't say too much here, but I promise I'll make this happen by the end of the week. Stay tuned for the show!"