I was filled with terror at the thought of what awaited me behind the doors of the Main Hall. Looking back, perhaps I was being a little dramatic.
It has been three months since that day, and I can now say with certainty that the one waiting for me was not an assassin.
He was a monk. A Sanskrit monk, to be specific, one who had come to China to study Buddhism.
My relationship with Lianyu had deepened ever since she gifted me the hairpin, but discovering that she had been searching for someone like Ariya, someone who could teach me the language, perhaps just to speak with me one day... it stirred something unfamiliar inside me.
Maybe it was the feeling of receiving affection, something I hadn't felt since my mother. Or maybe it was the joy of finally feeling like I belonged somewhere, like I was worth caring for.
Whatever it was, it felt wonderful.
At first, I had assumed the worst. It wouldn't have been strange to think the monk had come to harm me or the others. After all, many masks look like real faces.
His name is Ariya, and he looked just like me. When I entered the Main Hall, it felt as though I had returned home, and standing before me was a long-lost brother.
He wore a robe patched together with pieces of fabric, the most dominant color being orange. It reminded me of an egg yolk before cooking, vivid and warm. A single cloth was draped over one shoulder, covering part of his chest.
He smiled gently, though I didn't trust it at first. He was older, with wrinkles stretching across his forehead, but his eyes sparkled when he looked at me. He seemed kind, but trust never came easily to me.
For three months, I studied Chinese with him every day.
I don't know why I was so eager, maybe because I wanted to finally talk to Lianyu and Yichen, or maybe because I wanted to understand what the nobleman was always whispering behind my back.
Now, I can carry a conversation for a few minutes, and I speak to Lianyu daily. I tease Yichen often.
He reminds me of my younger brother, the one I used to annoy endlessly back in Bharat.
Being able to talk to them feels like an accomplishment, something I would've thought of as a punishment just months ago.
It has now been a full year since I first met the monk. I no longer fear him.
I understand the nobleman's insults and the bitterness in his tone when he talks about my looks or my broken Chinese. It hurt to hear, but Lianyu always defended me. I will always be grateful for that.
"Do you know what it means to give someone a hairpin?" Yichen asked one morning after I finished studying with Ariya.
"No. How come you still haven't told me?" I replied.
"Well, I don't really know how to explain it—"
"In China," Ariya interrupted calmly, "a woman often gives a hairpin to someone she treasures. It means they are special to her, and she will always stay by their side."
I didn't know how to respond. It could have been just a simple gift, right? Nothing more.
But something inside me doubted that. Could Lianyu really have meant it as a symbol of our closeness?
It has been nearly two years since I came to live in this mansion.
In that time, Lianyu and I have eaten together, talked endlessly, shared pieces of our lives. She had no one else, only me, Yichen, and perhaps Ariya, whom she also spoke to often.
The maids rarely spoke to her, and her husband only raised his voice in constant arguments, usually about me... and now, about the monk.
I pitied her.
Her life seemed lonely.
Maybe the hairpin was more than just a beautiful ornament. Maybe it was a token of the bond we had built.
I knew her life before her marriage, how she danced, sang, and played chess with devotion.
And she knew mine, back in Bharat, how I braided my mother's hair, sparred with my brothers, and danced for the suitors my father summoned.
We were close. I knew that in my heart.
Lianyu was grace itself. Even as a few gray hairs began to appear, hairs her husband mocked, I saw only beauty when I looked at her.
"Ohh, she must really like you then!" Yichen suddenly blurted out, dragging me from my thoughts.
I blinked and realized I was still standing in the Main Hall.
The monk looked at me curiously, probably wondering why I had been staring off for so long.