(1)
"Are we allowed to wear makeup?" I asked Yun in surprise.
"The school never said we couldn't," she replied without even glancing up at me. She stayed focused on the small mirror in her hand, casually adding a few more strokes of pale pink eyeshadow on top of what already looked, in my opinion, pretty heavy. "Do you need some?" As she spoke, she lifted the brush in front of my face.
I shook my head fiercely and said, "I'm good. Thanks."
That day, the countdown on the blackboard showed only 29 days left until the college entrance exam. Strangely enough, when the countdown was still in the triple digits, every passing day made me even more anxious. But once it dropped to double digits, it felt like I just wanted the day to come already. I was sick of the endless cycle of doing practice questions, checking rankings, and listening to lectures.
To help us relax a bit, the school had arranged a graduation photo shoot, with less than a month left before the exam. What made everyone even more excited was that there were no classes scheduled for this afternoon. In a rare act of mercy, the school allowed the third-year students to spend the entire afternoon outside. They chose a beautiful city park about ten-something kilometers from the school as our destination. Lili even brought a frisbee especially for the outing.
At the moment, we were lined up on the track field, waiting for our turn to go up the steps in front of the main building to take our class graduation photo.
"I think I saw a few of the guys even bringing fishing gear," Lili said softly from behind me while we waited in line.
"Fishing?" I turned around to ask her. "You can do that in the park?"
"What, are you saying if you had known earlier, you would've brought fishing gear too?" Lili teased, her tone a little sarcastic. "Come play frisbee with me instead. I asked a few people just now, but they all said they don't like it."
"I'm not that into it either," I replied.
"But fishing sounds like something old people would enjoy," Lili said, loud enough that if her voice had been just a bit louder, those fishing enthusiasts might have heard her.
"Alright, let's talk about it later, it's our turn to go up," I said, noticing the line ahead of us starting to move. I quickly picked up my pace to follow.
I had to admit, the school really knew how to pick a good time for photos. The sunlight right now made everything look beautiful. But standing on the steps with the sun directly in our faces, I didn't even want to imagine how twisted our expressions must look in the photo.
While the photographer was still adjusting a few people' positions, I suddenly heard someone nearby say, "Hey? Chenhui? Are you going to take pictures with us?"
Hearing that long-unheard name at school, I instinctively turned my head toward the voice, a little surprised.
Near the photographer, standing under the shade of a tree, I spotted that familiar figure.
"Nope! I'm not wearing my uniform," Chenhui said, waving a hand at us.
Then his eyes met mine, and he raised his eyebrows playfully at me.
Even though we still occasionally grabbed a meal or watched a movie together on weekends, seeing him at school again was a real surprise – a mixture of joy and relief. That familiar feeling of comfort from having him around came rushing back all at once.
After the photo session ended and we were dismissed, Lili and I walked over to meet him under the tree. "How come you're here?" Lili asked him, looking a little surprised.
"Our school just happened to give us a day off today, so I thought I'd come by and check it out," Chenhui said.
"Are you coming with us this afternoon?" Lili asked.
"Sure, why not?"
"Great! You'll play frisbee with us! Hahaha," Lili laughed triumphantly, like her plan had just succeeded. "I'm gonna go pack up first, you two talk," she said before dashing off.
"Your school is strict. How do you even get a day off?" I asked Chenhui, puzzled.
"You just know it too well! I actually faked a sick day today. Don't tell anyone though, my mom has no idea," Chenhui said easily.
"You came all the way here just to watch us take pictures?" I asked, still confused. "And how did you even get past the guards at the gate? You're not wearing a uniform either."
"I climbed over the wall. It's not my first time," he said, pointing toward the spot where he snuck in. "And today, I did it without even worrying. Mr. Zhang can't do anything to me now anyway!"
"You took such a big risk just to come here. Was it really necessary?" Though I said that, I couldn't deny that it was his presence that made me look forward to this afternoon's outing a lot more.
"Of course. What, you're saying I'm not welcome anymore?"
"I'm just worried your teachers will find out."
"I'm not worried. Why should you be?" he said, then gently pushed me toward the main building. "Come on, let's go pack up."
(2)
The afternoon turned a bit cloudy, which was actually nice, as it meant it wouldn't be too hot when we went out. On the school bus arranged to take us to the park, Yun was still complaining about forgetting her sunscreen.
Lili hadn't lied to me – playing frisbee was actually pretty fun. Plus, since I hadn't had PE class in ages, I thought it was a good chance to loosen up a little and stretch my body.
And just like she said, those who chose to go fishing were pretty much surrounded by old men who looked like they were in their sixties or seventies.
"Look what snacks I've brought here." Lili dumped everything out of her backpack onto the picnic blanket I had just spread out on the grass.
"Oh my god. I don't think I'll need dinner tonight." Yun immediately threw herself at the pile, picking out her favorite beef jerky and jelly. "Chenhui, come eat too," Yun said, chewing on her beef jerky while pointing at the snack heap.
"Okay." Chenhui took off his shoes and sat cross-legged on the blanket.
"So, how's your new school? Is it any fun?" Yun asked casually.
Chenhui let out a sigh and grabbed a package of soda crackers, tearing it open. "Don't even get me started. It's a nightmare. I can't even finish my homework, and the exam rankings get sent straight to my mom's phone…"
"Jeez. If our school publicly posted rankings like that, my mom would probably have cut me off by now," Yun said, her eyes wide. "Why'd you mom transfer you there anyway? Sounds super stressful."
"No choice. She wants me to get into a good college."
"But you already have good grades. What does she want you to do, rule Asia after graduation?" Yun pulled a pack of tissues from her pocket, wiped her hands with one, then went over and sat down next to Chenhui, tossing the rest of the pack in front of him.
"So what about yourself? What do you want to do after you graduate?" Lili asked Chenhui.
"I don't really know. Just taking it one step at a time," He shrugged at her.
"I feel like you should probably think a little more seriously about your future," Yun said. "Unlike me – I already know what I want to do."
Lili and I both looked at her curiously, because she had never mentioned anything about her future plans before.
"What are you planning to do?" I asked Yun.
"Get married," She answered without even thinking.
Lili and I exchanged a silent look.
"What? Is that so bad?" Yun asked, a little puzzled. "My parents got married really young. They're still doing great now. My mom switched jobs a few times after getting married too, but whenever there was something important, she had my dad to talk it through with. Isn't that nice?"
"Well, it's not like you don't have a point," I said. After all, every family's situation was different, and now that we were technically adults, it was pretty normal to have different ideas about the future. "What about you?" I turned to Lili.
"I haven't figured out exactly what I want to do, but I already know what I definitely won't do," Lili said firmly.
"Oh? Which is…?" I leaned in, kind of intrigued.
"I am never, ever doing a job where I have to clock in and out every day. Having to show up at school on time and leave on time has already drained me enough. I'm not about to spend the rest of my life repeating that crap."
Her answer made Yun and Chenhui snicker, because truth be told, everyone knew that Lili had been punished with standing outside the classroom more times than we could count for being late to morning classes. While she always went along with it without arguing, you could totally tell from the look on her face while she stood by the door that, in her mind, she had probably cursed out the homeroom teacher's family for at least three generations.
"And what about you? What's your plan?" Lili shot the question back at me.
"I have no clue. I don't even know what major to pick in college," I answered honestly.
"Alright. Let's sum up everyone's future plans real quick," Lili said, raising her voice and purposely mimicking the way teachers would when they were wrapping up a lesson. "Basically, aside from the one who's dead set on getting married, the rest of us are just straight-up lost."
Everyone ended up laughing at Lili's expression.
But while I laughed along with them, a tiny bit of sadness crept into my heart. In a future where none of us were really sure what would happen, would we still have chances like that day – to sit on the grass in a park on a lazy afternoon, with nothing to do, just eating snacks and talking about life?
Maybe this would be the only thing I'd ever really miss about high school –
having them by my side –
having him by my side.
Maybe someday in the future, perhaps at Yun's wedding, we would sit together just like that day, eating and chatting away. By then, we definitely wouldn't be having snacks anymore. Instead, on the Lazy Susan in front of us, there would be all kinds of delicate cold dishes, beautifully presented plates of chicken, duck, and fish, and of course, wedding candies.
By that time, Lili might have already owned a career that didn't require clocking in and out. Knowing her, with her love for writing, she might even become a columnist or a blogger. Lying on her own couch, typing away on a keyboard – that kind of life sounded pretty good.
As for Yun, since it would be her wedding day, she would have her hair done nicely, her makeup perfectly applied, maybe wearing a traditional red qipao. She would probably still speak as sharply as ever, and her husband, hopefully someone who would be able to defeat her in a discussion, could help me take my revenge.
In my imagination, however, the picture of Chenhui and me remained blurry and unclear for some reason. I couldn't see what we looked like, nor could I tell what we were to each other.
(3)
After stuffing ourselves with snacks and regaining some energy, we played a few more rounds of frisbee on the grass.
By the time someone came over to call us back to the school bus, the sky had already begun to darken. After all, we couldn't stay out too late that day because we still had a full day of classes waiting for us the following day.
When we got on the bus, the lights had already been turned on, casting a soft glow that highlighted the tiredness on everyone's faces.
On the way here, the bus had been filled with laughter and chatter. But now, even those who had spent the whole afternoon sitting there and fishing simply tossed their fishing gear onto the overhead racks and slumped into their seats, quickly nodding off.
Chenhui and I sat in the very back row, leaning against the window. Yun and Lili sat next to us, arms linked, whispering about something I couldn't quite catch.
When the bus started moving, the lights were turned off. Besides the occasional snoring from the people in front, the only sound I could hear was the soft purr of cars passing by on the road.
Since we were far from the city center, the scenery along the way, bathed in the warm hues of sunset, looked surprisingly beautiful. The breeze, squeezing through the window I had cracked open, refreshed the heavy air inside, making it feel a little less muggy, so I stretched out my hand slightly and turned off the overhead air-conditioner.
In the dimness of the bus, I quietly rested my head on Chenhui's shoulder. Gently, he slid his hand around my back and onto my shoulder, pulling me closer.
I did feel a little drowsy, but I tried my best to keep my eyes open, refusing to fall asleep. Because I knew that in no more than an hour, we would arrive, the lights would come back on, and I would have to pull myself upright again, pretending I had been sitting up straight all along.
How I wished that hour could last longer, and the evening could grow even darker – so dark that the only thing I could see was him, right beside me.
If darkness could bring moments like this, maybe there were times when light didn't have to be everything.