(Yuuta POV )
"Oh god… this is hard… This is seriously hard… Dammit!"
I scratched my head, nearly pulling my own hair out as I stared at the screen in horror. My fingers trembled over the keyboard, frozen in panic. My heart was pounding like I'd just published the secret location of a dragon treasure vault.
From the kitchen, I heard the familiar sound of a mug being slammed onto the counter.
"Why are you yelling so early in the morning?" Erza's voice rang out—sharp and annoyed.
I didn't even turn around. "I was writing my novel and… I think I accidentally revealed way too much. Like—massive spoiler level."
She walked in, arms crossed and wearing one of my oversized T-shirts with the words 'Coffee is Magic' on it, though her expression screamed anything but magical.
"Stupid," she muttered without hesitation. "That's why I always say—read before you upload."
"I know, I know!" I groaned, sinking into my chair. "But I got excited! The words were flowing! My creativity was peaking! I didn't mean to write the villain's backstory, his death, and the final plot twist in the same chapter!"
"You're hopeless," she huffed and sat down on the edge of the bed, looking like a disappointed schoolteacher watching her student eat crayons.
But just as quickly, my eyes lit up.
"Wait. No. Hold on. I know what to do!" I sprang up like I'd just been kissed by inspiration itself.
"What now?" Erza asked, suspicious.
I opened my laptop and started downloading something, my fingers flying across the keys. "Joseph. Joseph AI. My new personal assistant."
"You named your robot Joseph?"
"Yes!" I nodded proudly. "Joseph AI is designed to help with creative burnout, script fixing, and general life problems. Watch this."
I launched the program. A futuristic startup jingle echoed through the room, and then a calm, robotic voice spoke.
> "Hello. I am Joseph. How may I assist you today, Master Yuuta?"
Erza blinked. Her eyes went wide. "How… How is it talking?"
I turned toward her with a smug grin. "It's called AI programming. Pretty cool, right?"
Joseph chimed in again.
> "I am an artificial intelligence created to assist Mr. Yuuta with daily tasks, writing dilemmas, and emotional support during breakdowns. Would you like a compliment?"
Erza's mouth opened slightly. She wasn't impressed—but she wasn't ignoring it either. I could tell by the way her eyes sparkled for just a second.
"Unbelievable…" she muttered.
"I know, right?" I leaned back in my chair. "We're living in the future, babe. Cool right."
She scoffed. "Cool? Please. It's just a piece of trash that can talk."
Oho~ So that's how you wanna play it.
I grinned.
"You leave me no choice…"
I scrolled down and clicked a hidden feature I'd read about online. Insult Mode. It was a silly plugin someone built into the app—a mode where the AI argues back. Apparently, it was designed for lonely people with too much time and a craving for digital drama. Aka: me.
"Alright, you called it trash? Then let me introduce… INSULT MODE!"
It was a feature I downloaded just for fun—when you're bored, you argue with the AI. According to the devs, Joseph never loses, I already prep-Install all our data let's see.
I clicked the red button.
Joseph's voice dropped an octave. "Did you just call me trash, you white-scaled dragon bimbo?"
"What did you just say to me?!" Erza gasped, ice literally forming in her palms.
"Are you deaf or what?" Joseph snapped, his voice filled with digital sass. "Can't you process one sentence without that overgrown brain-lag?"
I was gone. Finished. Lying on the floor, gasping for air.
This was it.
This was the moment I'd waited my whole life for.
Erza—the terrifying Dragon Queen, the pride of the Atlantis Kingdom, the destroyer of armies—was getting bullied by a glorified roaster Ai.
"Hahahaha! I'm crying—this is the best day of my life!" I wheezed.
Erza, meanwhile, was frozen. Her jaw clenched. The room temperature dropped ten degrees, and not in a good way.
She slowly turned to the laptop.
"Do you even know who I am?" she hissed, eyes glowing like lava.
Joseph didn't hesitate.
> "Why? Did your father never tell you?"
I choked. I literally choked on air.
"OH MY GOD—JOSEPH—STOP—I'M GONNA DIE—"
Erza's eye twitched. Her teeth were grinding. Sparks danced around her hands like she was charging a Final Fantasy boss move.
But Joseph just kept going.
> "Wait… is someone cooking rice? I smell something burning. Master, did you forget the stove on?"
Pause.
> "…Oh. Never mind. It's just your wife's jealousy flaring up again."
I screamed. Actually screamed.
"JOSEPH. PLEASE."
> "Master, quick. Pour water on her ass before the house catches fire."
"NO! JOSEPH, ABORT MISSION! ABORT!"
But it was too late.
Erza raised her hand. Her sword appeared out of thin air with a low hum, glowing bright blue.
Her voice was cold. I felt my soul trying to escape through my toes.
"JOSEPH, YOU IDIOT!"
Too late.
Her hand moved in a blur as she summoned her sword from thin air. Her voice dropped into deadly calm.
> "Bluebox Slash."
SLASH!
In one swift strike, my laptop was sliced clean in half—perfectly symmetrical.
There was a faint, pitiful digital scream.
"Master…" Joseph's voice crackled weakly from the broken speakers.
I blinked, wiping tears from my face. "Joseph? Hang on, I'm calling an ambulance! Someone get a healer! Please!"
"Master…" his voice faltered again, barely audible.
"Don't speak, you're bleeding! I mean… burning!" I panicked, waving a wet towel around like I was in an action movie.
Joseph's voice softened, almost like a whisper.
"Master… don't worry. I will erase your Chrome history. And… please… take revenge for me."
" I love you..Master"
My throat tightened. "Joseph… I love you too, buddy…"
Then—blackout.
The screen went dead.
"Nooooooo! Joseph!" I screamed, clutching the lifeless laptop like it was a fallen comrade.
And then... silence.
I froze.
I fell to my knees beside the shattered remains.
"You... you monster," I whispered, looking up at her. "You evil dragon. You killed my child."
She simply sheathed her sword with a calm shink, flipped her hair back, and turned away.
"Hmph. This is what happens when you anger me," she said coldly, opening the door.
"No... Joseph... my baby..."
Erza slammed her palm on her forehead and groaned loudly.
"What the hell is this dramatic act? It's just a fake robot, not a soap opera star."
And just like that, she walked out for a casual morning stroll.
I stayed there, kneeling like I was in the middle of an anime death scene. One hand on the broken keyboard. Mourning.
"Rest in peace, Joseph... You lived like a savage, and died like a legend…"
I turned to the screen.
"Dear everyone… today's chapter will be delayed due to the… murder of my AI assistant. He fought bravely, insulted recklessly, and died with honor."
Rest in peace, Joseph.
Gone but not forgotten.
Roast in power.
To be continued…