oV - Rachumel, Technically Not in Exile
"Tell everybody I'm on my way! New friends and new places to seeeeeeee… With blue skies ahead, yes, I'm on my way, and there's but one place that I'd rather beeeeeeee…"
My voice carried into the forest air as I strutted forward, the morning sunlight illuminating my four white wings, still bright and dazzling and oh so holy and fluffy. There wasn't exactly a path for me, so I more or less decided to just walk east and hope we eventually found something.
Who was the "we" in the situation, you may ask? Well, there's me, your loveable Shota who absolutely grew at least an inch taller after gaining a new pair of wings! I checked thrice!
Then of course, we have Stella, currently curled around my neck and sniffing at the forest air. She popped up sometime last night after Helel passed out.
And I guess Helel was here or something. And where was Helel, my most grumpy of brothers? Well…
Alright, he's kinda comatose. So I summoned Perry, tossed the emo punk on his back, and now the giant platypus was waddling behind me, chirping along to my song. I remembered his hat this time, too!
"Tell everybody I'm on my way, and I'm loving every step I takeeeeeee! With the sun beating down, yes, I'm on my way, and I can't keep this smile off my faceeeeeee!"
Honestly, I wasn't much scared of anything in this forest. I knew the gap between classes was big, but holy shit. I'm definitely Mid-class, even on the lower side, and I know I could smoke Past!Rachumel in every category.
Possibly even dick size, too, which concerned me for about three seconds before I remembered I was in a hentai world and it was only going to get more porn logic-y the longer I interacted with things. Whenever shounen logic didn't interfere, of course.
Despite it being a couple months since Helel crashed and I followed, I haven't had any communication from Heaven. Possibly Mom was still handling the fallout of Eden. Possibly demon incursions have drawn Her attention, or The Beast. Maybe the presence of Helel meant no angel was allowed to approach. Or maybe the most likely reason…
Mom was absolutely fucking continent-destroyingly pissed and trying not to vaporize my grid coordinates.
…I'm gonna get spanked when I go home, I can feel it. That's a problem for future Rachumel!
"'Cause there's nothing like seeing each other again, no matter what the distance betweeeeeeeen! And the stories that we tell will make you smile, oh, it really lifts my heart!"
Food and water weren't too much of a problem, actually, because I am not a total moron and made sure to keep close to a river. Stella was good at hunting mushrooms that wouldn't send us all on trips. Perry kinda just slaps the water, and the fish commit sudoku from fear. After that, I just took mine and Helel's portions of food, cooked it over a fire and skewered on a stick, and presto! Fish without any kind of seasoning!
…Mom above, traveling in a world without easy condiments sucked ass. I usually just mashed up Helel's portion with some purified water (holy power is great at that!) and force fed him whenever I made camp. Sometimes it felt like he was trying to wake up, but I think he was still reeling from the lack of Mom's Grace.
Having been a human without it? Confirmed, no warm Mommy hugs sucks major balls. It really put into perspective how fucking awful Falling must have been for normal angels, and why they went so batshit crazy. I didn't condone, but I did understand.
Hell, I might be the only angel who'd be able to shrug off Falling, not that it could happen.
Being built stupid has its advantages.
"So tell 'em all I'm on my way! New friends and new places to seeeeeeee! And to sleep under the stars, who could ask for more? With the moon keeping watch over meeeeeeee!"
There was a rustle in the shrubs ahead, and I watched, bemused, as a little werewolf came crawling out, hackles raised and snarling. Its fur is matted with filth and blood, and sharp blue canine eyes looked for any weakness before it pounced. A pounce that never occurred because an arrow made of light punched through its head before it could even tense the muscles.
It died without any visible effort from me, just a small magic circle at the tip of my wings.
The monster was kinda expected, though. Helel's unconscious form was practically a beacon for monsters or something, his aura screaming out "Hey, come eat me! I'm defenseless and delicious!" I have no idea how canon Helel survived. Possibly on the power of hate and spite, possibly because he crash-landed hard enough to punch through the Earth's barriers and land in the Underworld.
In any case, I've been slaughtering monsters since we started moving, and Perry and Stella occasionally assisted when something more than the low-class fodder I used to be wandered out from their murderbolt fuckcave, or something.
Look, I've seen some shit since this all started, and I was now firmly racist against most monsters. I'm sure that humanity will one day wonder how a bunch of caves look like they've taken the brunt of a point-blank thermobaric bomb, but again, future Rachumel will deal with that. I was trying to sleep without nightmares of so many raped corpses.
Mom help me when the Vampires arrived. But I will most likely just scorch them all to death.
Assuming Uriel doesn't beat me to it.
"Not the snow, not the rain can change my mind. The sun will come out, wait and seeeeeeee!
And the feeling of the wind in your face can lift your heart, oh, there's only one place I would rather beeeeeeee!"
I pause as I take a bend past a cluster of trees, and blink at what appears before me.
A beautiful meadow, right next to the scenic azure waters of the lake that stretched to the horizon. Wildflowers and more bloomed without limit, coating the greenery with splashes of the rainbow. Near the middle of this scenic view was a cottage, rudimentary but functional, clearly able to block the worst of the elements. A garden stretched out from the left side away from the lake, and the right side held sheep grazing in a field, blockaded in by fences. A chicken coop was in the back, the animals clucking in the morning air.
It was, all in all, something right out of a fucking Disney studio animated production.
I turned on my heel and told Perry, "We're fucking leaving, this is some fae bullshit."
Perry chirped. Stella yawned. She hopped from my shoulder to Perry's back, climbing atop Helel and curling up on his spine for a nap.
"Glad we agree!" I took one step away from my future doom and froze entirely.
Not out of fear, or worry, or because I noticed something as I turned around, but because my entire body was encased in magical force and slowly pulled backwards.
Perry! Perry! Get me out of this! I don't want to be in a stew! My muscles are small and stringy! I mentally screamed. If you can't save me, save Helel! Flee!
Perry cooed. Stella yawned. Then Perry began waddling right after me.
PERRY, NO, I SAID FLEEEEEEEE! Alas, my mental cries meant nothing, even as I heard the soft, sinister laughter pick up behind me.
"Well now, I spy a little angel, so far from home…" said an eerily familiar voice. "How unlucky for you, pigeon boy. Your feathers will be… useful for…" Her voice trailed off. "Wait. I recognize those red locks. I always wanted to thread my fingers through them." I heard a snap of fingers, and I felt the magical force heave and spin me around to face whoever captured me. "Rachumel?"
While the woman before me blinked in incredulity, I took her in as well. Instead of the nudity she had before, the woman was now girded in a full mesh body suit that still revealed her entire body through the sheer fabric. Black hair that tumbled down her neck, but now with some of the long locks tied up into two small pigtails at the back. Dark eyes, nearly black, narrowed in suspicion. She seems to have discovered lipstick, as her lips were painted black with a soft glossy gleam that caught the sunlight. Gold rested at her neck in a huge necklace she must have crafted herself, with gold rings around her wrists and ankles.
The woman was short, but her breasts would perfectly overfill my tiny hands; and yet, it was her insanely thick thighs and massive ass that commanded my attention. I had no idea how those meaty globes fit into that body suit, but her behind commanded its own gravity in my attraction to it. Her thighs were just as stupendous, equal to her ass in the sheer quantity of mass they had in store. Both led into flared hips and a thin waist, resulting in a body aching to be bred and mother hundreds of children. But the woman's body wasn't muscled or even toned, and clearly made of soft curves begging to be manhandled.
It's a testament to the power of my hentai cock that it actually managed to move under the spell afflicting me and get a big chub.
Of course, I recognized her just as she did me.
Lilith, the First Woman.
Or as my mind liked to play on repeat, "Big Booty Goth Mommy."
Once she realized I was trying to say something, she released the capture spell on my head, at least. "Hi Lilith! I like your house. Are you still mad about Adam not wanting to go down on you?"
Lilith closed her eyes, slowly inhaled, and then released the breath, staring at me with a lidded gaze. "Of all of the Lord's angels, I should have expected you, brat." She rolled her eyes. "Do you have a reason why I shouldn't pluck your wings clean for my spells and kick you out the door?"
"Um, you're my friend?" I gave her a winning smile. "If you need some feathers, I can part with some, though."
"How do you have two extra wings?" Her eyes narrowed.
"Oh, from saving that moron from becoming comically stupid and brain-damaged."
Her eyes turned to look behind me, and her eyes turned into saucers. "Rachumel. Did you bring Helel, the Favored Son of God, to my house?!"
"...Not intentionally! I didn't know you lived here! I thought it was a faerie house!"
"Why is he unconscious?!"
"Uh, a lot of stuff happened. It was Biblical."
"What's 'bibl- no, nevermind. Explain."
"Uh, suuuuure? Can I be let go? There's an itch on my nose and it's getting worse."
"...I see you haven't changed much, though the lack of lewd comments is surprising."
"I think the chub attempting to rebel under my robes says enough, hotstuff."
PoV - Lilith, Having Trouble With Reality
My arms were crossed, lifting up my breasts and perhaps unconsciously teasing the horny angel with the view of her inverted nipples. "So," I said, having taken in Rachumel's story with a mostly stoic frown. "Samael is imprisoned, Helel is banished, and You… are what, traveling?"
"Babysitting." Rachumel dragged his hands through his raccoon, Stella's fur, stroking her as she snored on his lap. "Helel's a bit dumb sometimes and makes a lot of bad decisions, so I'm going watch over him and make sure he doesn't get into trouble!"
I stared.
I stared very hard at this man in the body of a growing boy.
My mind was trapped between laughing at Rachumel's beliefs, awe at the sheer lack of self-awareness this angel lived with, and deep unease that someone as cosmically foolish as Rachumel thought his brother needed a watcher. And a mild bit of attraction.
You certainly don't forget a dick that big. Even if I never touched it. Hmm…
Of course, mortal fear at the idea the Lord might smite me for harboring the angel who betrayed Him and the angel who ignored Him also pervaded the room. But I tucked that away, because any thoughts about that self-righteous hypocrite and her asshole of a First Man were of no use to me when I could not act on them. "I see."
"You're not mad at me, are you?" Rachumel grimaced awkwardly, and I raised an eyebrow.
"Pray tell, Rach. Why would I be mad at you?" I lift a single eyebrow.
"I mean, I did kinda sorta maybe kick off that last argument between you and Adam."
I scoffed. "It was coming anyway. I wanted to experiment, he wanted to be a bore. He also kept naming creatures without me, despite the fact I was his wife." I paused, inhaled again, and let the anger over my ex-husband go. "I assume your Father summoned up some other strumpet for him to bed."
"Yeah, but Eve's nice. Don't be mean to her." I looked closer at Rachumel, and met his gaze evenly. "I mean it. She's innocent in this."
"…Tch, you are not wrong." I leaned back on the couch I had built myself. "Besides, she and Adam have their own worries now. At least I didn't eat my apple in the Garden."
"Yeah, Mom was annoyed about that." Rachumel returned to petting Stella.
I raised an eyebrow. "…Mom?"
"Oh, that's what I call the Lord."
"Why?"
"Eh… Stuff happened. Calling Her Dad just didn't feel the same." He smiled with a smug expression that I couldn't quite interpret. "So, She is Mom now."
"The Lord truly does let you get away with anything," I remarked, my eyes narrowed at him.
"Ehehehe, let's hope so! I don't think my booty will survive, otherwise." Rachumel's smile transformed to a more panicked grin. "Pray for mercy, eh?"
"I find it unlikely you will receive much." Now it was my turn to smirk. "Certainly not in the way you left, and what you did."
The Lord was a petty, jealous, and vengeful God. I have no doubt time will only worsen his punishment, not reduce it. But who can say? The other words I have heard from him describe a much more merciful deity than I remembered from my brief years in the garden.
"So," Rachumel began, "do you think Helel and I could stay for maybe a week or so? I'm hoping he recovers soon, so I stop having to care for him, and I don't want to spend more months aimlessly wandering."
I looked over to the small side room I had made nearly a century ago to store food, and where the Fallen now slept. Rachumel had more or less put a blanket and some pillows beneath his brother, as it was all I could spare. When I looked back at the small angel, I bit my lip as I considered.
On the one hand, the Lord couldn't really punish me just for sheltering them for a single day. That's just hospitality. I also didn't much care for God outside of trying not to draw His attention. Perhaps a few decades ago I would have jumped at any chance to bite my thumb at Him, but time has a way of cooling tempers.
Now I just wanted to be left alone.
On the other hand, Rachumel was perhaps the one angel I could have tentatively called a friend back in Eden, even if he made no attempts to hide that he wished to lay with me. Attempts denied by Adam, the stubborn ass. Rach meant well, and the fact his wings were still white instead of Helel's dark grey had me chance that he was not in trouble with Heaven. I let my eyes rove over the young man again - barely into the beginning of manhood, but there was a maturity in his eyes that most men I had witnessed since leaving Eden lacked.
Well, maturity at the moment. I was certain it would vanish the moment the topic wasn't serious.
Or if it involved bedding me. I remember his comments about my posterior.
"You will assist in daily chores. Clean the coups, tend the garden, shepherd the sheep, watch for danger. Additionally, you will freely offer your services for my magical studies," I began, and Rachumel perked up. "In return for your service, you will be fed, clothed, and given a place to sleep. Is this agreeable?"
Rachumel looked down at his robe, and seemed to finally notice it had some tears and holes in places. Curiously, very little dirt stained it. "You got yourself a deal, Lilith. Thanks for this."
"Thank me with your work. It is still early in the day" I pointed out the door. "Your pets can assist in guard duty. I fed the chickens. Check the garden for weeds."
"Ah, man. Weed-pulling sucks ass." I smiled as Rachumel visibly drooped when realizing work began immediately.
I imagine tonight he won't be drooping for long. Eheheheheheeee…~
PoV - Rachumel is on the Farm, E-I-E-I-O…
In engaging in one of the world's oldest professions, I was going to be honest.
Agriculture sucks.
I knew I had been spoiled in my past life, growing up on my previous Pa's farm with all the latest tech. Huge acres handled in the same day with trucks and machines that I've long forgotten the name of. Food enough to feed one of the largest nations in the world. Of course, I didn't want to be a farmer and left, but I remember enough that it was still much easier work than it was in the past.
And despite being quite literally ten times stronger in this tiny body then my old dad bod was, these weeds just would. Not. Stop. Snapping. No matter how hard or lightly I tugged, these stupid fucking plants would not ever come up in one bunch.
I spent four Mom-damn hours plucking these budding cunts down to the roots.
When Helel wakes up, he can do this shit. I'm gonna go hug the sheep!
I floated over to begin my watch, only to discover that Stella and Perry were trundling around, guarding the moronic wool gatherers like dedicated sheep dogs.
I didn't even think Mom made dogs yet. Or maybe it was done before my time. I knew wolves were around. When the fuck did humans domesticate wolves anyway?
"Ah, you're done with the garden." I turned to Lilith, who smirked at me from the doorway. "Well, since your pets are clearly doing a fine job with the sheep, do me a favor and gather some herbs nearby in the forest. I've included samples and descriptions so you don't bring me back something useless."
"Love the faith you put in me," I said, already taking the two leather bags from her and the clay tablet.
"I am a generous woman," she replied, turning back inside to her cottage, and I proceeded to watch those swaying hips, because holy shit.
Mom knew what She was doing when She made her.
I turned back to the forest, sighed, and moved on. Time to see how much poison ivy I touch like an idiot.
It took me the rest of the day, and about thirty light spears to wipe out a small werewolf clan I stumbled over a few miles away, but I got it done. I arrived just in time for night to fall, and trundled in with full bags. "Hey Lilith! I got your shit!"
"Place it on the couch. I'll sort it after dinner while you feed Helel." Directions followed, I floated past the entrance room and into the kitchen and dining room, where a massive pot rested over a fire. "Serve yourself a bowl."
With her permission, I dug in, inhaling two whole bowls of the soup. Chicken broth, with carrots and some other vegetables that were probably some precursors to the more familiar ones. I think I saw peas? But they were the size of a thumb, and pretty flavourless overall. The broccoli was obvious, but I did my best to ignore its existence.
Fuck broccoli. I reserve the right to say seven-year old me was correct.
With a sign, I scooped up another bowl, Lilith clearly having already eaten before. I opened the spare room to Helel's resting area, and spent a good ten minutes spoon-feeding him the food. His body neither fought nor aided me, and I had to coax his throat to get him to actually swallow the food. I sighed, and realized I was probably going to be caring for him for a few months more. Weeks, if I was lucky, but I don't think luck extends to waking coma patients.
It was as I finished cleaning all the bowls that I heard a cough behind me, and turned to see Lilith in her doorway, looking at me with a raised brow. "Oh sorry if I was loud," I apologized, and set the cleaned bowls aside to dry. "I'll head to the couch now to sleep."
"Rachumel." Lilith's voice was different, and for a reason I could feel Rachumel Jr below perk up at. "When did I say you would sleep on the couch?"
"You… didn't?" I answered, realizing slowly after that yes, she didn't say where I would sleep.
"Rachumel," I heard, and turned to see Lilith's lips slowly curl up. "Do you remember when you explained how the, ah, threesome between you, myself, and my ex-husband would work?"
"…Does it have anything to do with me saying my dick would be up your butt."
"Yes." Lilith turned around, a smouldering look tossed over her shoulder as she looked at me. "So. Are you up to educating me~?" She turned forward, and walked into her bedroom as I felt the words sink over me.
"…Sorry, Adam," I said, my whisper silent as I looked towards Lilith's bedroom. "You fumbled the Goth Mommy, and now I gotta slam dunk."
I didn't even hesitate to float into Lilith's room, and shucked my minorly ripped robe to the floor. She was already nude, resting on her bed, eyes gleaming in triumph and trepidation as she saw my divine rod. Lilith's finger pointed at me, and she curled it back towards herself. I followed the demands of the hungry cougar, crawling on the surprisingly fluffy bed.
Lilith's legs spread wide, and her hand took hold of my increasingly erect cock, tugging me forward until we met groin to groin. My massive dick stretched up her stomach and abdomen, smearing pre into her soft skin. "So, here's how this will work," she began, her voice a purr as she stroked me, increasing my tumescence with every pump. "This beast," her other hand came up, tapping my crown, before shifting to rest on my chest, "will not go inside my vagina. At all." Her eyes met mine with deadly seriousness.
"Okay?" I said, swallowing as my cock, blatantly thicker than her arm, twitched.
"I don't know if my womb can actually carry your seed," she said, her face twisting from smile to frown, "but I have no wish to test it. I have no desire for children at this time."
"Pinkie promise, no kids." I decided to not reveal that angels and humans could definitely knock each other up, mostly because my dick was stealing all the thinking blood. And if it got any more thinky blood, then I was probably going to knock her up.
"Good. Now… how are we supposed to fit you in me?" Lilith looked down at my shaft again, exasperation and awe colouring her tone. "What are you, over thrice Adam's girth? More than twice the size? Why the Lord decided an angel needed such a massive, thick cock is beyond me."
"Little rude, and let's not talk about another dude when I'm about to fuck you." She might be correct, but I wasn't going along with the trash talk of Adam. He was a good dude, if vanilla as all fuck. "Here, just… Get on all fours, I can take it from there."
Lilith raised an eyebrow at me, and I matched her gaze evenly. "Fine."
Within a few moments, she had shifted to doggy-style, and I took a hold of my giant cock to rest it on her massive ass. "Now, I haven't actually had to practice this spell I invented, but…" I focused, summoning my magic until clear liquid dripped from my fingers. "Hehehe, and Azazel said it was a waste of magic power." Without waiting, I pressed my fingers to Lilith's ass, and sunk in the magically purifying lube.
Mom grounded me for a month when She found out that I had taught the spell to Penemue.
Below me, Lilith yelped and twisted to stare. "What did you just-?!"
"I call it lube, short for lubricant!" I said, grinning at Lilith as I pulled back to let her look at the glistening fluid on my hand. "To reduce discomfort!" Once she had nodded, shivering as I moved to push more lubricant in, she turned back around, moaning quietly as I prepared her.
I know this world worked on Hentai Logic, but I genuinely wasn't certain if "Perfect Anal Sex" was a thing as well. You know, the whole, "Everything is clean, no lube needed" stupid shit. Because let me tell you, that shit was a lie back in my old life.
I refocused back on Lilith, and with my other hand, spread even more lube on my dick, which went far faster than trying to push a knuckle into Lilith's tight backdoor. Five minutes passed before I was content, and I took a breath, aligning my crown with the little rosebud.
This was going to take some work. "Relax your muscles, Lilith, or this is going to take a while."
"R-right then… go slow."
"That's gonna happen no matter what," I said, but at the very least, Lilith forced herself to release her tension. It was a slow grind to fit my head, but within a minute, I had pressed the tip inside.
Within another few seconds, my crown had sunk into her ass, and I paused for my own breath. "Holy fuck," I wheezed out, twitching at how tight Lilith was. She was paradoxically warm and cool, the colder lubricant slowly heating from her hotter insides.
Below me, however, was just a string of swears from the First Woman. "Fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck!" she gasped, twitching in my grip. The hand I had moved to her waist clenched harder, and I began slowly rocking myself back and forth. Anal sex was about going slow and steady, gentle and waiting - I don't even know if I can hurt Lilith, who is at least High Class, but I'm not about to try.
My pace worked, five minutes passing as I slowly rocked myself deeper into one of my oldest friends, even if it had been a century. Beneath me, Lilith's fingers dug into the bed, into her pillows, to maul her own breasts as she accepted the pleasure my thick dick was inflicting on her. Cute moans and slurred words escaped, but not a hint of pain.
Honestly, I was beginning to expect Lilith was an anal slut. She was practically mewling as I rocked my cock inside of a hole that definitely wouldn't have fit a schlong this big in my old world. "Alright, Lili," I said, my voice just loud enough to catch her attention. "I'm about halfway in-"
"That's halfway?!" Lilith sobbed and whispered, and I couldn't tell if it was rapturous joy or primordial fear. "I feel so damn full already… Adam could nev-"
"-and now we're gonna try to push further," I interrupted. Now, more than ever, I was looking for the hint of pain. But even as I pushed and pushed, her backhole swallowed every inch, each centimeter taking multiple seconds just to accept.
But before long, before even five more minutes passed, I saw Lilith's asshole swallow the entirety of my cock. With a groan of my own, I moved my hands to squeeze the thick, bootylicious rump before me. Lilith had lost her entire seductress demeanor, and a quick application of magic to conjure a mirror before me showed off that she was cross-eyed and drooling.
Well, if we really are working on hentai rules and roles… I grinned, and slowly drew back, withdrawing almost the entirety of my dick. Lilith squealed and moaned as I did, clearly not handling the sensations of Shota schlong well enough. With an inhale and an exhale?
I slammed myself back to the root in Lilith's tight, twitching ass, and clapped her cheeks hard enough they were still wobbling for nearly ten seconds.
And Lilith? She choked up, froze entirely, and I could feel wetness splash my fat, spunk-heavy balls. "Heh, look who just came from a fat angel cock up their butt, Lili?" I reached forward, hands digging into her thick locks, tugging on her ponytails. I didn't need the leverage of standing or kneeling, I could just fuck her while floating, and my wings would handle all the stabilization I needed.
Her response was a gurgle, and I tugged on her hair to see her face. Tears sat in the corners of her crossed eyes, and her tongue and jaw were limp.
But I didn't see pain.
And I didn't hear a "No" or "Stop."
So really, there was only one thing to do.
Lilith.
I would have hospitalized a woman from my old world with how hard I fucked Lilith's ass, but apparently women are just built different here. Ten strokes in, and I bent down, heaving one of Lilith's knees over my shoulder. My arms locked around her thick thigh, and I tilted my head to watch Lilith's titties bounce, her inverted nipples popping out from how hard they were.
But it was the bump on Lilith's abdomen that truly caught my attention, and I chuckled when I realized I was huge enough that hentai logic decreed my cock would bulge her stomach out. With every stroke, I watched Lilith's body writhe to my rhythm, the woman putty in my hands I fucked her harder and harder. Her boobs, a perfect handful, bounced up and down, her mouth opened and her eyes rolled back in a classic ahegao. Sweat dewed her skin only to make her sexier, the low moonlight only highlighting her curves.
However, my balls were aching from lasting so long, and with Lilith's fifth orgasm in as many minutes, my own orgasm was upon me. With a final nut-clenching thrust, I buried myself so deep that if someone managed to pull me out, well, I might just have to figure out how to crown them King of Britain.
I tensed just as Lilith did, a new orgasm upon her once the heat of my finish released inside her. In short order, my own finish quickly escaped the near seal of our joining, but it didn't stop me from watching as Lilith's tummy began slowly rounding from the liquid weight of my stupidly huge finish. It was only a small paunch… for now.
"What the fuck… what the fuck…" I heard Lilith whisper, a modicum of rationality returned once my rhythm halted. "That was- the best…" I watched as her dark eyes met my blue. "Holy fuck, Rachumel. Those orgasms…"
"Yeah, I'm pretty amazing," I answered back, heaving a sigh of relaxation. Not that my cock relaxed at all, which Lilith noticed.
"Lord above, if we had gone with that threesome… I probably would have left Adam sooner just to fuck you," she said, resting back on the bed. "Steal me away, baby. Goddamn."
But me? I froze.
For a moment, my mind reeled back in time, spanning over the last century.
"Rachy! Watch me do this!" I turned, and watched Eve swallow a banana whole.
I blinked, staring in awe. "Adam must be very proud of you!" I said, while thinking, Lucky son of a gun...
"Tee-hee! I showed off to him already! But I wanted you to see me swallow it all!"
I choked on the air for a moment before recovering, well aware that Adam said no threesomes. "...I can only state that you are amazing, Eve."
"Aw, thanks, Rachy! I'd swallow a banana you gave me anytime!" The brown-haired woman, whose chest rivaled Mom herself, gave me a V-sign for victory.
"I'm sure you would!" I chuckled, missing the dark twinkle in Eve's eyes.
"Oh... no. Fuck." I slumped at the same time Lilith did, who blinked in confusion as I lay on the bed, staring emptily at the ceiling.
"I'm an NTR antagonist, and I almost cucked Dadam."Last edited: 18 Oct 2025Yes, I do in fact really hate Wakanda.
AngelxAneurysm - a DxD story featuring one horny angel shota saving(?) the world Like ReplyReport Reactions:FistOfZeus, stealthily, Gafgarion and 1,788 otherskilokilop17 Oct 2025Add bookmarkView discussionThreadmarks Chapter 10View content24 Oct 2025Add bookmark#2,567kilokilopReal Wakanda Hating HoursJoined21 Mar 2022Messages2,867Author's Note: Exposition & Transition chapter for this one. Figured this note should tackle a few subjects, so let's knock them out.
Rachumel is not an Eternal Shota. He will, however, get a "Form" to swap between how he is supposed to look as he grows older and his original Shota form, because his harem will be full of horny goddesses. If this is a dealbreaker… bye?
Rachumel is NTR-coded, but himself, as he's firmly stated, is against NTR in almost every way - with two exceptions: an abusive partner (and he'll still get them to break up before anything happens), or a situation where everyone is informed and consents about what happens (which… I have no plans for?). So don't hold your breath on some women that might pop up.
Consider Mythology of every Pantheon as "Guidelines" and not hard rules. I am cherry-picking what is happening in ways that more or less make sense to me and the story. Let's not dive-bomb with "WELL ACHTSUCHULLY" because I will just ignore it. XD
Please be sure to check out the Appendix and Extras tabs for both canon and non-canon omakes, respectively! There is some great stuff there, such as @Flowerman 's additions to canon and @Musashi-Chan 's sexy omakes.
Interlude next Friday.
Angel Brainrot ENGAGED.
PoV - Rachumel, Harvest Moon-maxxing
My hopes for Helel's awakening were wildly optimistic. He'd been comatose for months before we wandered up to Lilith's doorstep, and now, twenty years later…
Well, he woke up before the end of the second year out of Heaven. That was the good news.
The bad news was that Helel was so damn depressed I had to invent suicide watch for him. He'd eat and drink what I put in front of him. He'd go bathe when I asked; but otherwise, my brother did nothing but lie back on his bed and stare out the window. The sheets he used to lay on had been upgraded to a proper bed with wooden support and stuffed wool, but that took time, as I had earned it with hard work. His eyes were empty, his usually gorgeously luscious white locks limp and flat, and his wings were never out.
The barest bits of interaction I could coax from my brother were returning my hugs, and frowning at Lilith. She didn't hesitate to return the sneers.
I couldn't imagine this broken angel leading anything, let alone a rebellion against Heaven.
Twenty years is a lot of time to care for a practically invalid brother, so I had had time to think. My leading hypothesis for the changes were the context of Helel's fall, where it happened, and the timing of it.
My vague memories of "Biblical canon" assured me that Helel was most certainly not alone in his original Fall. He had convinced a great deal of angels to follow him, and believe in him, and God cast them all out at once. Perhaps this was true in DxD as well, perhaps not, but I find myself more and more convinced that being alone this time was the greatest catalyst. Sure, I chased after him, and that likely stopped whatever happened in his psyche from fracturing and making Lucifer, but the truth remains that only he and Samael rebelled. They didn't even rebel for the same reasons - Samael was a corrupted traitor already, but Helel was rebelling to help Mom, not try and replace Her.
The next change was the location, and perhaps the landing. I doubt my brother would have been particularly enthused with crashing through mountains, possibly even into the Underworld itself. Such a landing in more lifeless and remote areas, however, would have protected him and his followers in the original canon from demons and monsters, I think. He would have also been surrounded by sycophants who bought into his hype, instead of me, the greatest angel who ever lived. He might not have trusted his co-conspirators enough to rest and recharge, and forced himself to take charge.
There was not a doubt in my mind that I had earned Helel's eternal trust. He let me hug him now!
For the last part of my hypothesis, I had to consider the timing. Talks I've had with Lilith had taught me she'd given up on her anger against the Lord, seeing it as pointless. But, she only gave up on them twenty years ago from the day we met again (and I anally-creampied her, this is important lore); two decades wasn't a long time in the grand tapestry of time, but it was enough to change crucial facts. Helel likely wandered until he found Lilith, and with both still simmering with anger and hate at God, they would have joined forces. They would have descended down to the Underworld, slowly experimented to make the Devils, and recruited the creatures that would become Leviathan, Asmodeus, and… Bezlebulb? Beezelbub?
Fuck it, it's a stupid name.
Altogether, this hypothesis of mine led to one definitive conclusion - I changed the fucking history of the world.
I had to lean back on Perry and just stare off into the night sky when I realized that a few years ago. Maybe I didn't stop Helel from falling, but I'd bet my wings I stopped Lucifer from being an evil douchebag.
How about that, Mom? I thought at the time. I grinned up towards the twinkling stars, just enjoying the blanket of night above at that moment in time.
It did terrify me, though, knowing I could actually change what should have been. There was a feeling of safety in knowing what will happen, and likely why so many other isekai stooges loved to cling to the rails of canon.
But hey, "Fuck It, We Ball", am I right?
The two decades I've spent on Lilith's little plot of land have been quiet, pleasant, and utterly mundane. She lived within a few miles of three other tiny villages, and occasionally traded with them for supplies and food. I was surprised to see farming, especially this early in humanity's civilization history, but I did remind myself that historians can only see what they find and extrapolate from. It looked like most villages and tribes were still in the transitional period between hunting and farming for sustenance. Give it another thousand years, and we'd probably start to see actual civilization form into something bigger than a tribe.
If these humans can stop murdering and raping. Lilith could easily defend herself, but whenever I accompanied her for trade to some of the more distant villages…
Well, I think this was the negative of having a past life with 21st century morals.
There are no morals in tribal warfare.
I haven't even mentioned the demon incursions that have popped up. Lilith and I have crushed them handily, but that doesn't mean I enjoy arriving at a village after the demons have made contact.
I still have nightmares.
Speaking of Lilith, it was abundantly clear to us both that we were not in love by the end of the first year together. Good friends, certainly, but the spark of romance that I felt between myself and Mom, or myself and Aphrodite, was simply not there. Yet, at least.
Okay, if I was to be honest, there should be a slight correction. Emotionally, Lilith and I were best friends with amazing benefits. She was a wonderful and intelligent woman. The last few years of her off-handedly mentioning some of the village children were cute was all I needed to know she wouldn't mind if I impregnated her.
Physically, though, Lilith had all but enslaved herself, body and soul, in worship to my cock within a month of our carnal activities' start.
Hentai dick was no joke.
Where once she choked, merely struggling to take half of my monster shaft into her mouth, now she inhaled my manhood down to the root. Whenever I went down on her, to gift her the same heights of nirvana she gave me, she immediately returned the favor, treating her mouth as but another hole for my pleasure. Her hands and breasts knew every vein, every nodule of pleasure that existed for my dick and balls. Her taut, gripping asshole had, over the years, lost none of its tightness, but barely struggled to handle my immense phallus, her back entrance molded to my meatrod. We had experimented with every possible position we could over the years, and her thirst for sex with me had grown to the point she would willingly drop whatever she was planning or doing to join with me, to say nothing of the constant hearts (created through her internal magicks, I laughed real hard when I realized that) I could quite literally see in her eyes.
Yet not once, not in the entire two decades of our coupling, had my cock ever been inside her vagina.
Because ever since I have been reborn to this celestial life, my one constant has been being a little brat. Lilith mildly insulted my pride which she banned me from fucking her in the pussy, like I was some brute or animal that didn't know how to pull out. Thousands of times since we started, I would catch Lilith focused on my cock, or staring at my enormous testicles, her gaze dilated in fantasy. When she was on top, that shortstack anal slut let my cock stretch up her stomach and held it just below her titties with a hand, clearly trapped in her own naughty thoughts. When I was behind her, withdrawing my dick after an anal creampie, Lilith would stare back at me, all but begging me with her eyes to ram it into her untouched hole. Every time she had allowed me to be on top, her hands would guide my cock to her lower petals, nestling my crown right at her entrance, and silently demanding I flood her cunt and knock her up. Her hands would slide down and cup my balls, gently massaging them, simply to entice me further.
And every damn time, I would smirk, and "remind" her that she said no vaginal sex. I would invoke all my smug brattiness, and Lilith would go silent, her pride warring with her lust. And then I proceeded to mold her asshole around me again when the words never came.
She wanted the fucking of a lifetime? She wanted little Rachumels running around? Beg me.
It was a game now, between who would lose their nerve first; and after twenty years, Lilith knew she was losing.
It was practically the daily rhythm for us: Woke up and fucked. Handled the animal feeding. We ate food ourselves. I made sure Helel ate breakfast. Checked over the magically augmented golems tending the gardens. Fucked again, then lunch. Cleaned up at the Lake, fucked there, because clean up when you get dirty. Handled the other hunting and gathering chores. Played with Perry and Stella. Practiced our respective magicks. We prepared and ate dinner. Made sure Helel ate dinner. Spent the night fucking until exhaustion. Rinsed and repeated.
Turns out there was not much to do but fuck, without modern entertainment.
Heh heh heh, but fuck, heh heh heh.
Well, I did discover very quickly that cumflation was true of this world, and Lilith? Very into it. Hentai balls were seriously no joke, and considering the way Lilith loved to rub her belly, fat and full of cum, with a dopey look on her face? I think I can guess what she's really thinking.
Mom might get some grandkids in the next decade.
…Which brought me to the other problem, in that Heaven has talked to me once in the past twenty years, and it was Michael visiting five years ago when I was gathering herbs and mushrooms.
"…So is this the mushroom that tastes great in a soup, or the kind that tastes like shit and sends me on a trip," I muttered, looking at the bright white mushroom in front of me. "Well, human me on a trip. Man, I should have brought Stella. She definitely knows the good stuff." I carved through the bottom of the stalk, throwing the fungi into a separate bag.
"Rachumel, why does your familiar know about drugs?" I heard a familiar voice behind me ask.
I was a bit focused on harvesting some mint I saw. "She likes to get high a lot. I don't even know where she got those coca leaves, but little Miss Stella White spends half her time tending to her stash in the garden-" I froze, and slowly rotated my head to look behind me. "Michael?"
"Hello, little brother. I am glad you are well." He gave me another of his smiles.
I rocketed into his chest at almost mach one. "MIKEY! Holy balls, it's so good to see you!" He, of course, was unbothered by a hug that would have snapped the spine of the average person. "What's going on? Do you need help? Does Mom need me back?"
"It… does, in fact, relate to what Father sent me here for. As an official message." He gently pushed me away, and floated up a bit, extending twelve wings of shining gold, his proof of being the Lord's First Son. "Be Not Afraid, Rachumel; in the name of the Lord of Angels, thus you are charged with being your brother's keeper. You are to guide Helel as he chooses his own Fate, as he wishes. You are to pass on, however, that should Helel redeem himself, he may return to Heaven."
"I thought Gabriel was the Messenger, though?" I asked, not even blinking as Mom's message was just a reinforcement of what I was already doing. "And seriously, 'Be Not Afraid', Mikey?"
"She is currently busy with diplomacy elsewhere," Michael answered, his wings folding back in and cutting off the light show. He gave an embarrassed cough "Father bade me send this message. My messenger skills are… routine."
"Oh. Um… nothing else?" I asked. My hands folded in front of me, wringing my fingers.
"Father… will be happy to see you when you return." Michael's smile was awkward, but genuine.
"…She's still pissed at me, isn't She."
"Blindingly so."
"How bad?"
"I believe Father mumbled something about a 'belt of chastity'?"
"…Oh fuck, I'm gonna get spanked."
"After fornicating with Lilith? Yes. Yes, you are."
"Avoid home for the next century, got it… So! How are the others?"
"We are all fine, Rachumel." Michael laid a hand on my shoulder reassuringly. "Every Seraph has asked me to pass on that we miss you, as do all of your brothers and sisters. Heaven isn't quite the same without your mischief."
"Well, obviously! I bring a certain je ne sais quoi that you just can't find anywhere else on Earth." I turned my nose up with a fake, snooty huff.
"Rachumel, we live in Heaven."
"...Details!"
Michael laughed. "It is good to see you in good health, little brother." He hesitated for a moment, then asked, "Is Helel…?"
"Not good. But not as bad as he could be." Holy shit, is it better than it should have been, I thought. "I'm making progress, but I think he's still coming to terms with everything."
"He knows we love him?"
"I remind him every day," I answered, my hands wide for another hug, which Michael accepted. "Tell them all to come visit! Even if it's only when I'm out in the forest, I'd love to see them."
"I'll relate all you tell me, Rachumel."
So yeah, Heaven is trodding along as we go, and it seems Mom doesn't need me to distract the Seraphs from Her absence now that the truth is out. So my new job is to make sure Helel doesn't go insane with power and try to murderfuck the earth as Lucifer.
No pressure, right?
I sighed, sitting up from where I tried to nap on one of the bigger sheep. Lilith was probably practicing her magic and biomancy shit - I've seen her strangle one of her attempted rapists with his own veins, though. Might have thrown up at that.
I shuddered away the memories of Lilith's cruelty towards the idiots that saw "pretty woman" and acted on that violent impulse, just in time to hear plodding footsteps behind me. "Everything's fine with the sheep, Lili, no need to check."
"I am not Lilith."
I blinked, and whirled around to see Helel standing there. He's lost a bit of color, hiding away from the light, but even though his golden eyes are still dull, there's more life in them than I've seen in years. "Helel! Is something-?!"
"I am… recovering." His interruption wasn't rude, even if it was terse. "I have had many things to contemplate in these years."
"Alright." I hopped off the sheep and folded away my wings and dismissed my halo. It was probably in bad taste to flash them around when his were not so pristine as mine. "Whatcha been thinking? If it's about joining in with the 'Fuck Lilith senseless' sessions, that's mostly on her, not me. We can 'eiffel tower' her if she says yes, brother!"
Helel's face scrunched up in distaste, and honestly, confirmed what was probably true in canon as well - Lilith and Helel tolerated each other for revenge, and each saw the other as a tool. Except here, there was no commonality of hate for God for them to form an understanding, so they both just disliked each other.
Helel didn't like Lilith because she was human, and one that ignored Mother's Grace.
Lilith didn't like Helel because he was a pompous ass, even back in Heaven.
I'm at least sixty percent sure if it wasn't for my presence, Lilith might have just left Helel to rot. Or used his body parts as experiments. She takes enough feathers from both of us as is.
"Do not even jest about such activities." Helel's disgruntled frown peeled away to a more resting bitch face. "The sound of you two fornicating as it is is too much."
"I'd apologize, but that implies I'm sorry for making a beautiful woman squeal."
"Indeed." Helel heaved a sigh, and I grinned at seeing a bit of his old grumpy self returned. "I come to speak to you, brother, because we have spent enough time working here."
"…What's this fucking we business, you haven't done shit!" My eyes squinted towards my much taller sibling. "I've been busting my femboi-looking booty earning rent here, while you've been crafting mournful soliloquies and munching on cookies!"
"You have not genuinely put forth effort working here in fourteen years," Helel breezily bypassed my arguments. "The golems were your idea, and now the entire farm is automated. You and Lilith have simply been inventing busywork to do so you don't simply engage in sexual intercourse from sunrise to sunfall. And sunfall to sunrise."
"How dare you accurately call out how I spent my time earning our keep!"
Helel gave me a pointed and flat look.
"Don't give me that. I'm pretty sure I'm a month off from giving Mom grandkids!" I retorted to his unamused stare. "I can taste Lili's weakness!"
Helel opened, and then closed his mouth. "Rachumel," he said, slowly, like he thought I was an idiot, "how would humans and angels even be able to interbreed?"
I squared my shoulders, and looked my brother dead in the eyes. His gaze sharpened, perhaps sensing my next words to be momentous. The chickens stopped clucking, pausing to stare into the ether. The sheep were silent as the grave, bleating gone. The world held its breath as I said, "Through God, all things are possible. I'm gonna knock up that Goth shortstack," and nodded sagely.
Helel stared at me.
I met his stare evenly.
Perry snored in the corner of the field.
Stella farted right after that.
In that second, my face was shoved in the dirt. "Why?! Why do I keep thinking you have any wisdom in that sex-obssessed head of yours?!" Helel yelled.
I would have answered, but I was desperately keeping my mouth closed in fear of swallowing this dirt. The sheep peed in it!
PoV - Lilith, Mildly Baby Crazy
All three of us sat around the dinner table, Rachumel, Helel, and I. Our meals consisted of poached eggs with sides of carrots and broccoli, and I was greatly amused at the way Rach scrunched his face every time he ate one of the greens. A man, but at heart a child, all in one body.
I wish he'd pin me down, shove my knees next to my head, and plant his seed in my womb.
"We have spent enough time here," Helel spoke, the angel finally back to some semblance of his former pride and authority. "I am… appreciative of your hospitality." The words sounded like Rach threatened him to say them.
Pity. I liked the prideful git better when he was silent.
"You are welcome. We will not speak of it again." Better to offer the Fallen the out so he need not feel the need to escalate.
"So yeah. I guess we're leaving?" Rachumel said, but he sounded uncertain. That didn't surprise me; he had been caring for his brother for nearly twenty years, but with Helel no longer moping, he's falling back on that century of listening to his more powerful brother. "Helel wants to visit the other pantheons to learn about them better. My idea, really."
Lock your hands behind my head and bruise my cervix with your broad crown.
"Of course. Do you have an idea of the lands around you?" I asked.
"A less-than-satisfactory one." Helel looked disgruntled. "I am uncertain of what could have changed in my… convalescence."
"Apparently Heaven is doing Heaven shit," Rachumel said, poking a carrot with the silver fork that he came up with. What a genius little tool for eating. "Uh, I'm not too sure about the other stuff. I think Michael mentioned the Norse went to civil war?"
Give me triplets, I don't even care how many, you huge dicked bastard.
"The Aesir and Vanir," I answered, holding both of their attention. "That conflict began recently, if what I'd been able to divine with my magic was true."
My magic, gifted from the Lord Himself, was the counterpart to Adam's gift. Adam could steal any energy he came across with his body, and turn it into support and power for himself. But I? I could manipulate any energy or magic I came across, and create any spell. Adam could counter and stall any attack, but I can outmaneuver and end any threat. We were meant to be complements.
Unfortunately for God's plans, Adam was an insufferable bore.
Enough of my tangent. I had crafted many divination spells to keep an eye on the area around me for many miles. From simple visual scries to catch demon incursions, to elaborate detection wards to detect intrusion, to even an esoteric apparatus to catch rumors from the crosswinds of fate, I had made certain to protect my little slice of home.
"Dang. That's probably going to rage for a bit, especially if the Jotun pop up to fuck things up," Rach said, popping the carrot into his mouth.
Stop being a stubborn brat and break my cunt on that fat meatpole of a cock.
"The Bogovi are insular, but we should avoid them," Helel said, pulling my attention towards the pompous ass. "Veles is known to Heaven. A scout watched one of his 'minor pranks' that devastated a mountaintop, just to annoy Perun."
"Alright, what about the Nementondevos? Over where those nomadic tribes are," Rachumel asked, pushing his empty plate away. "I know the Tuatha and the Plant Don are squabbling with their enemies… or that's what I got from Michael when I asked."
There's no way my womb could ever truly handle one of his massive loads… unless a spell…?
"West is a no go. Too unpredictable," Helel stated, looking at Rachumel, who easily nodded. He clearly missed the undertone of caution in his brother's voice, and I suspect the Fallen won't risk his brother if he can help it. "We shall investigate East. If necessary, we shall step into the Underworld to avoid the attention of the pantheons."
"Hiding from someone?" I asked, my lips curled into a smug grin at the scathing look Helel tossed my way. Helel could easily contest most gods, even weakened by his Fall. There's only two pantheons one of his power would intentionally avoid.
Heaven… and the Deva. And he certainly isn't hiding from the Deva for his own sake.
"No need for attention where it is not wanted," came his cool reply.
Hm. I expected him to explode.
"I heard some of the death gods are fairly chill," Rachumel said, interrupting our banter before it could take off. "If we ask nicely to pass through, I'm sure it'll be fine."
What will be fine is when I break your hips riding you as you impregnate me.
"Very well. We can pass through the Theoi's lands first, and then investigate East." I dabbed my chin with a knitted towel that Rachumel made, and both angels stared at me. "What?"
"You're coming along?" Helel asked, an eyebrow raised in wariness.
"The golems will tend to the animals and the garden," I answered, shrugging at their continued stares. "I have lived here for over a century, and travelling with you two has the chances of mildly more entertainment than sitting here."
"You sure, Lili? Because honestly, I'm not even sure, and you're way stronger than me," Rachumel spoke up, his hands resting on the table. "Like, Helel could throw down with Kronos and walk away alive. And I'm barely better than scrub-tier fodder, just with a bigger dick."
You could still be two-wings and I'd get on my hands and knees to beg for that massive cock.
"I am certain. This land isn't exactly defensible in the first place," I said, my hands crossing under my chest. "If some pagan god wanted my body… the defenses might slow them down enough for me to know my rape is coming." Well, I could probably best some of the weakest deities, but I didn't chance much above that.
I took great comfort in the flash of rage in Rachumel's gaze at my blunt words, even if it was tempered by a pragmatic awareness of his power.
…It's nice to know someone cares. Even Helel appeared to grimace in sympathy. I elected not to embarrass him with the show of empathy.
"Still, I see no reason to bring you along," Helel asked, and I raised an eyebrow at his apparent civility. I expected a much more blunt dismissal.
"I can see two good handfuls of reason to bring her, hehehe…"
"Shut up, Rachumel." Helel rolled his eyes in fondness, and I let my own low chuckle escape.
"Because, Helel, the first is that my magic is quite literally far more versatile in application than either of yours." Helel begrudgingly conceded that with a nod. "The second is that I know the general lands far better than either of you. I wandered for quite some time." Helel accepted that again, as much as it disgruntled him. "The third is that I can likely keep your brother out of trouble."
Helel's brow raised in skepticism. "I find that unlikely."
I smirked, and moved my hands to squeeze my breasts.
Like hell I'm letting that massive cock swing away from me before I get my little Rachumels.
Helel let out a long-suffering sigh before chancing to look over at Rachumel, who had zeroed in his gaze on my breasts like a wolf with a bone. With a final bounce, I released my breasts and leaned back in my chair, smirking with victory.
Rachumel looked over at Helel the moment I stopped, and the brothers met the gaze of each other without fear.
"…You cannot be seriously swayed by her offering her body. Something you already partake in."
"Brother, I'm ready to risk it for the biscuit."
"What does that even mean."
"It means she's on-board, end of discussion. It also means you need to learn sound muffling wards. Lili can scream like the best of them," Rachumel said.
He didn't need to know that.
"I did not need to know that." Helel shuddered and broke away from the staring contest. "Fine. But if this goes wrong-"
"There's no need to worry about that, because things always go wrong for the protagonist of reality, like me." Rachumel nodded to himself, before hopping up on his chair, and slamming a foot on the table, as if he were trying to be the captain of a boat. "But that doesn't matter! Because we, my grumpy brother and sexy witch babe, are going on the most fun vacation ever!"
"Grumpy-?!"
"Who are you calling 'Witch'-?!"
"We're going on a ROOOOOOAAAAAADTRIIIIIIIIIIP!" Rachumel yelled, throwing his head back and screaming it to the ceiling in his excitement.
Helel and I both stared blankly at the little angel, and though I couldn't speak for his brother, I knew the direction of my thoughts sounded a little bit like, I can't believe I want this particular idiot to be the father of my kids.
…Who am I kidding, I'm soaking wet just thinking about Rach planting his seed in me under the stars~