I spent a week in the woods before I felt in control enough to return, waking up from a nap to the two-tone sky created by dawn fighting the night for supremacy. I yawned and cracked my neck as I stood and used magic to clean myself, then decided to go find breakfast before heading back to town.
After hunting a rabbit to prepare a stew, I ate and gathered the vast array of pelts I had collected, slinging them over my shoulders in tied-off bundles and carrying more still.
As I drew near to the gates, I heard an alarm sound, beginning to wonder if I was actually ready to return if there was drama unfolding. I let out an exasperated sigh, realising that helping out with whatever this latest emergency was the least I could do for Halsan after the sleepless nights he was undoubtedly suffering.
I began to notice guards forming up at the gate I was approaching, so I turned to see if something was approaching stealthily from behind me. Walking backwards slowly, I wondered what the hell it could be, my search was coming up empty for every single thing I could think of with enough skill to approach me undetected. When that didn't work, I began to fear the worst and searched for Sil, who was nowhere to be found and my detection magic was unable to light her up.
"Does anybody know what kind of of damn monster it is!" Finally a familiar voice called out, immediately followed by several replies.
"A wendigo?"
"The wild man?"
"The woodsman?"
"Whatever it is, can somebody please fill me in, I can't sense a damn thing for some reason." I shouted, backing up toward them until I felt spears poking my back. "Get those damn spears to the side and tell me what's coming." I dropped the pelts and drew my sword, whatever was coming was unlike anything I'd faced before.
Suddenly laughter erupted around me. I wondered if they were afflicted by something, with no other choice I prepared a wide range spell, then a familiar hand on my shoulder. "Careful, the woodsman cometh." Leeson said, barely restraining his own laughter, but clearly mocking me.
I relaxed as I realised I was in fact the one that caused the alarm, asking the guardsmen if they really forgot what I looked like after just one week. One of them gestured at all the pelts as well as me. "No we didn't, if we had we might not have soiled our breeches when you walked out of the woods like some kind of wendigo."
"He was definitely more Wild Man…" one of the other guards interrupted.
"Shut up Carl!..." The interrupted retorted, about to continue before another man interrupted him.
"Yeah Carl, he was definitely the woodsman, even Leeson agreed."
"Will you guys, please. Just. Let. Me. Speak." As the guard ranted I declared they all lost their speaking privileges and used magic to force them down to the ground, bodies suddenly too heavy to stand.
"Did you lobotomise them all while I was gone?" I growled at Leeson, who had yet to compose himself, instead trying to talk as he slowly collapsed holding his stomach.
"I don't know what that is, but yeah they are pretty dumb, they rang the emergency alarm and now all the adventurers are getting prepped to come meet you in battle. The others are going to have a brea-br… They're going to have a breakdown." It was clear the commander wasn't recovering from his borderline hysterical mirth, in fact he was only feeding into it by trying to ask me to play the role of woodsman when they arrived. Though I grew tired of it and tossed him into the effect of my spell, creating a chorus of groans as he belly-flopped onto his floored men.
When the others arrived, I had removed the pelts and was demanding that everyone trapped manage a single push-up to earn their freedom. Everyone was understandably on edge, thanks to what was unfolding before them. I had disappeared for a week, come back in some manner deserving an alarm and was now toying with the head of their military and the symbol of its strength. "Have you decided 'welcomed by armed friends' to be the traditional homecoming for this town."
"They attacked you? You expect me to believe that? I know he can be impetuous but I would never believe Leeson attacked a friend without cause."
Leeson started snickering, the heaving causing his men to groan as they were further squished beneath him. At that point Halsan and Byurik sighed, bowing slightly and apologising to me, then rebuking Leeson for not ending the alarm immediately when he realised it was me.
Suddenly Leeson managed his one push up and I released him, he then asked me to turn its strength down a quarter and sent for two more guards to actually watch the gate while I got even for having weapons drawn on me. The men were exhausted by the time the final one was released and a great many people had appeared to take bets on who would be last and how long it would take, one man walked away almost obscenely wealthy.
"Right with that done, I think I best escort the fellow to the guild so he can store it safely," I said, standing from where I had been sat watching for a couple of hours at least.
When we finally arrived at the guild hall and reached the desk Valo disappeared, making me wonder if I was in for another violent lecture, but she ran to Byurik's office just a few disappearing for a few seconds before returning to the top step and ushering me up.
"I think she missed you this past week, but the master's office? Never took her for such a scandalous thing." Dusk's voice echoed from the mess section and I instinctively held my hands up as if to say "That was not me", knowing full well that would not stop the inevitable violence now in my future. So I simply bolted up and hugged her, if only to move her out of the doorway, then stepped into the room and quickly locked it.
"Can you please stop pulling the girl's ponytail and just ask her out already." Byurik said, seemingly quite fond of the idea of us dating and making me wonder if she had said something to him.
I sighed and slid down to the floor. "I truly have no interest in relationships, never have done, likely never will. I know it's likely a strange concept to most, but I don't think that's why three of the most important men in town have just had a foreigner still proving himself ushered into a secret meeting." I said, preparing to skip talk of such boring topics.
"I would say you have more than proven yourself, more importantly, so does everyone, and I do mean everyone else. In days You solved the economic crisis, culled a significant number of local beasts and monsters, brought joy to many long term residents, earned the people's trust, eradicated the corrupt merchant's guild, secured enough intelligence to keep their supply chains open and had the self-awareness to place yourself into exile when you felt your presence dangerous. Have I missed anything?"
"Brought more annoyance to Valo than he brought happiness to others and literally lived long enough to become a monster we were ready to burn at the stake." Leeson added, smirking to himself as Byurik and Halsan shook their heads, suggesting that my absence has clearly left him unable to relax.
"If you think that's enough to prove myself then I will defer to your judgment, personally I was barely getting started. Now, why don't you tell me what was so urgent." I had a good measure of them by that point, I knew we wouldn't be here just for the wager and they were all far too busy to waste time on such a menial item.
"Your companion has become quite erratic, she isn't here, she hasn't been seen in days. Fala has been asking Leeson's men, adventurers, Valo, she even came to my office in case you left her in my care for some reason." Halsan explained in a dire tone. "I have suggested to her that she perhaps followed you into the woods to keep an eye, I have heard you are close to her and her father so I didn't want to worry her while you were gone, but she seems fond of the girl and deserves an explanation."
I couldn't help but laugh a bit. "I love how everyone is so protective over that little girl, she really is going to grow spoiled if we wrap her in cotton wool." I was about to continue, but Leeson cut in.
"Of course we're protective, if you think we will let any ill befall her after seeing what you can do, you're an idiot. Not only because I have no desire to see anything like it again, but because you didn't seem yourself doing it. You just did. Like it was the most logical thing to do after seeing whatever you saw." My mood soured slightly and Byurik struck Leeson and called him an idiot.
I promised them I was ok, in fact spending some time with Fala sounded delightful, so I informed them I would spend the next few days taking her on gathering trips to ease myself back into civilised living. Which they agreed sounded like a good idea, before finalising my itinerary for me. Though Itinerary might be a stretch for what was essentially look after Fala, drink with them, sleep, repeat until they announce my new position when I will have a few additional duties to attend to.
I also promised to decide what to do with Sil by the end of the year, which by my estimate was about six months from when we had arrived in the world judging by the knowledge given by the 'god' and some date marked paperwork on Byurik's desk. Even if that decision was based on the idea that she would return at some point, which I suspected she would now that I had.
Everyone was in agreement and I made to leave, heading for Rain and Fala's home to begin my reintegration into society. Though when I opened the door Valo integrated her palm with my face and left me to depart to the sound of everyone laughing at my expense.
When I arrived at my destination, Fala was overjoyed, jumping at me and stumbling over her words until Rain told her to let me come in before she scared me off. "I can't tell you how happy I am to see her so open with someone." He said after she finally tuckered herself out and he put her to bed. "She was always shy, losing her mother was tough on her since I work so much, I was more concerned with keeping a roof over her head than a smile on her face and I know how bad that is before you say it."
"I never had children, never wanted any, never any good with them either. Men like us know what we know, do what we're good at and do it excessively in the hopes it makes up for what we can't. That said she cares a lot and I haven't seen kindness or potential like hers in a couple of lifetimes." I spoke softly, pouring us a glass of one of my favourite drinks, whilst he stared at me confused.
"Oh, that's right. Wait, a couple? You said you were getting on a bit more than you look, but don't tell me you have no concept of how long a normal human lives." He rambled, making me realise that I had basically given up on all the lies.
"No, I know. Too long for some, not long enough for the rest. That's the worst part of life, it never ends at the right moment… Like a bad book, the ending is usually terrible." I couldn't bring myself to lie anymore, so I just decided to wax poetic and hope he dropped it before asking flatly. Luckily he did just that, asking instead about my parents. "It's strange, I don't remember much about them really, yet what I do remember is so vivid it seems more like a bittersweet dream."
"You don't remember, were you young, or simply too long ago."
"Both." I replied with a chuckle. "I know they didn't die peacefully, I hope to get even for it someday, but I know they loved me dearly. As old as I am, I only know of three who truly cared about. Not just laugh with me, but truly cared about me, imagine my surprise when a week in this new world saw me match that number and then some. I'm self aware enough to know Fala and you do, Halsan does, as do Byurik and Leeson, hell I think Dusk over at the guild is going to be fighting Valo for my affections before long."
He chuckled heartily at the last bit. "I noticed you didn't mention Sil by name, was she the third or is that one of the secrets we're all pretending you aren't keeping."
"Rain, I'll tell you this now, there is a darkness in that girl that threatens to swallow her and everything close by. That's one reason I stay so close to Fala, I fear she might believe she has some kind of ownership over me, like a possessive lover but far more dangerous."
Rain's face darkened, then toasted me and said he'll hold me responsible if anything bad happened to his daughter, then joked that that was dependent on whether my anger at such a thing didn't reduce them all to dust before he could.
We didn't speak much after that, just drank until we fell asleep.
When I awoke there was a fresh bowl of porridge in front of me, along with Fala and a very hungover Rain, who I granted magical relief. "You know it's weird that you can sleep sitting up in a chair perfectly, right?"
"Weird but convenient." I laughed, stretching as I dug into breakfast, tousling Fala's hair as I thanked her.