As I looked at the kid I just named in front of me, wondering if they were gay for a brief moment because of the way they looked at me, I just shrugged it off in my head before asking, "Child, now that you have your bearings, might I ask where exactly this place is, as in the kingdom's name? I don't know, sadly, because I got lost on the way here," with a fake nervousness and an artificial blush on my cheeks.
Nehemiah proceeded to say in response, in an unsure tone, "Well, uhh, I—I'm not quite sure, but I did overhear a few adults who were praying in the church say something like they are grateful to the Primordial One, something, something, protecting the Kingdom of Calamity above the waves of chaos."
Kieran, for the first time since arriving in LOTM, genuinely wanted to run into the arms of either God Almighty or Celestial Worthy of Heaven and Earth for Blessings and confess secrets of the future. Barely controlling his face, using his faceless characteristic, he nearly timidly asked, "Come again?" Which, for a reason unknown to him, caused the newly named Nehemiah to surmise before saying in a barely audible voice, "I—I umm think we uhh live in a place called the Kingdom of Calamity from all the prayers I've heard, sir..."
I wanted to bolt and call for Adam right there and then, or even Sasrir, but I held that in along with keeping my fake smile on.
As I nodded and said to Nehemiah in as gentle a tone as I could muster, "Nea, thank you for telling me. You did good. If there is anything you need, just ask me. I'll be in my room studying. Oh, and don't forget to knock; I might fall asleep after not paying attention to the time passing while studying." Once Nehemiah nodded at me, I got up and walked out.
While furiously thinking to myself, 'This place having a similar name to Cheek's Demoness Sect allies is a coincidence; so is this place having an eerily similar name to the city of calamity. Yes, yes, yes, I've got to be right; there is just no way Amon would drop me in one of Cheek's probably backup plans or failed attempts, right? Right? Yes, there is just no way they would do... that.'
After a while of frantically trying to convince myself that Amon wouldn't do what he thinks "she" did, I slumped on my bed, thinking, 'Who am I even kidding? With "his" personality, I've been practically asking for some bullshit like this to happen to me. But more importantly than me possibly being screwed over by Amon, if this place is somehow connected to the Chaos Sea, then I definitely have to do something about it.
Because from the hour-long walk I took all through this place, I only saw one beyonder, and even then, she was a retired old woman who felt like she had less spirituality than me by a long shot, and even looked confused when seeing me. Asking me if this unpopular place was going to get a surge in beyonders again, even asking if I was an assassin like those others from back in the day—which, well, makes my previous coping actually be me coping.
Well, I'll just push past that detail. What matters most is this place believes in Cheek pretty blatantly, and I even saw something about tax exemptions from Medici, so this place is clearly related to them. But I really, really, really don't want it to be like that; it would be such fucking bullshit if it was.
I know I would be cooked by a LOTM fan in the comments if this was some fanfic, with them saying some shit like, "Of course, they would have multiple backup plans! Like, bro, Medici and Cheek are both planning some crazy shit with little probabilities. Anyway, why would they stick with a grand total of one plan for the entire 4th epoch and hope it goes well?"
Or even something like, "Bro, just run away then! You don't have to deal with that bullshit. And yeah, why don't you just run away to Adam and help God Almighty or something? You're just doing things in hard mode." And to number one, I say, why can't you let a man hope? And number two, all I have to say is: because I want Mr. Fool to exist so I don't get utterly screwed over by events that should happen not happening and causing Celestial Worthy of Heaven and Earth for Blessings to wake up and revive, which I don't know if you noticed, should have happened like 15 times in LOTM and COI, and only not happening because of luck.
So yeah, sorry for living in the webnovels version of Evangelion, where I need to scheme for a thousand or a few thousand years just to not die or for the world to end. I don't have a savior complex or anything, btw; I kinda just don't wanna die. Like, let's be honest, if you went into LOTM, you're probably not a super nerd about it like me, making it so you steal something related to Klein's growth without knowing and awaken Celestial Worthy of Heaven and Earth for Blessings or even God Almighty, because that dude had like what, at least a hundred times to come back?
And by a miracle, if anyone other than the Ancient Sun God, aka The Original Goat, aka Grisha, the one who carried humanity, we would all be screwed sideways. Like, I bet some dumbasses would try to get their hands on the first Blasphemy Slate just to get Amon'd by Primordial God Almighty and be all like, "Nani? How? I didn't do anything to awaken them! How did this happen?" But I digress. Help me; I'm in great danger! I want my mommy! I'm scared shitless by being in this kingdom, and Amon already said I had to survive 10 whole fucking years on my own. Help me, whichever god is out there.
Or even you, Cuttlefish; I promise to kowtow in front of a memorial of mine every four hours if that is what's needed. I don't want to be here anymore; I don't wanna die. Please, I'm scared; I'm only 24 a—and I miss my mom. I even miss my little brother. I just want to leave now.
Please, I'll stop reading LOTM and COI fanfic, being smug about me knowing everything and being able to do better than the protagonist in them, becoming an overpowered harem god in it and all that. I have lived here for less than four days, and even though I have already digested most of my potions, I am already most likely in a conspiracy of two crazy gods.'
And as Kieran just lay in his bed, praying and hoping for some miracle or even revelation that would help him, knowing no one would respond, he could only bitterly smile as he curled up into a ball, regretting his life.
(A/N: So I really wanted to make this as non-depressing as possible, but I couldn't really because, well, now that Kieran finally has some me time to himself to think, he's realizing, "Oh shit, I'm going to probably die stopping the plans of a crazy 'goddess' while trying to make sure he can plan 1000+ years in advance so he doesn't need to worry about the world ending."
Fun Fact: If you go down the path of either Chaos Demoness or Red Priest, you 100% become a potential resurrection point for Primordial God Almighty, and that's the case for a lot of other pathways. That is why my MC is taking the path he is. I won't reveal more, though, because I feel like I keep spoiling major future events.)