Sorrow In The Room
Li Wei was all alone in his loneliness when no one was around. The noise that had now become silence only made it more apparent to him.
He looked down at his hands ;motionless, still tense. His chest felt like it was being squeezed from the inside.
He was not exactly angry, just... confused. Maybe he was hurt. A small part of him had thought she would be able to understand.
He had believed that of all the people, Miss Mei would be the one who understood.
"But why her?" he said once more, almost inaudible. If saying it out loud would have brought the answer to him, he would have done so.
But the answer was still absent.
He was not sure whether it was the rejection that hurt him the most or if it was so because it was her who gave it to him.
For a certain time, he remained absolutely still.
Only the sound of the wind at the window and his noisy and restless thoughts were there in the room. Then he slowly got up and moved to the desk.
Next, he opened the drawer where he had put the letter from Ying. He took it out.
He spread it again and read it once more under the dim light of an oil lamp. The very same words. The very same pain in each line. His sister was in pain. And no one was there with her.
And he couldn't even be there for a day.
He rested his elbows on the desk and covered his face with his hands. He tried to inhale calmly, to keep his composure. But the weight burdened him too much.
Why was Miss Mei so persistent in her refusal?
Could it have been the only reason ;rules? Or was there more? Was he still her servant? A worker in nice clothes?
He was not sure anymore. And what was worse, he didn't know how to phrase it if he wanted to ask her.
He looked out the small window above his desk. The night had come quietly. Stars blinked above the rooftops.
"I can't stay here," he whispered. "I have given my word. I said I would never leave her."
Li Wei laid on his mat that night, his letter resting ever so delicately beneath his pillow, like the steady beat of the heart. He could not get any sleep; when it finally came, it came rushing in as if the night itself were rushing toward something: a rescue, or a kept promise.
Then came dawn.
No gentle yawns greeted it, and there was not a moment of lazy sunlight to stumble by. It exploded so suddenly that the sun could probably stand there, waiting for someone to wake up and cast a spell on it.
The soft light poured through the windows, waking him up, forcing him to sit upright with urgency. There was no time to lose. Today was the day-the day to fulfill a promise.
His dressing was hurried, smoothing out wrinkles all along the way. He splashed water on his face to wake up and throw away the last bits of sleep. His tired eyes were full of quiet determination. He adjusted his coat and tucked the letter closest to his heart.
And so he set out...
For the East Wing.
Before reaching the door, he stopped a passing maid and whispered yet with resolve that she must take a message, for he wished to speak with Miss Mei. Just a few words. He would wait in the courtyard.
And he waited.
A moment later the door opened with a creak, however, it was not Miss Mei that came, it was a handmaiden.
"If you please… may I speak with Miss Mei?" he asked politely.
"She is expecting you ," the handmaiden said without delay, stepping aside. "You may enter." She went out of the hall with her footsteps echoing faintly behind.
Li Wei stood still for a breath. Then he raised his hand again and knocked, gently this time ;out of respect. The door opened again.
It was her.
Miss Mei was there in the softly lit room, dressed in pale ivory morning robes with lavender silk trims. Her hair was neatly tied into a formal loop and still had the shine from the early grooming.
Although she did not wear any jewelry, her presence was still very regal. Commanding. Her face was calm, her back straight, chin up.
Even though she was not moving, she still had that high-born grace ;the kind that made others instinctively bow.
Li Wei swallowed hard. Her gaze was clear and unwavering.
But there was no turning back now.
He bowed low, eyes on the floor, then slowly raised them and spoke with quiet determination:"I… I have come to ask for leave today. I must go and fetch someone –my sister. Please… I will be very quick."
Miss Mei did not say anything at first. The atmosphere between them was still. Then she finally spoke not with resistance, not with suspicion ;but with calm acceptance
"Okay. You may go," she said.
He blinked, a little surprised. But before he could thank her, she added, "Where exactly will you be going? Will it be a long trip?"
"Yes," he said quickly. "The next town over. She's staying with relatives… but she's not safe there."
Miss Mei nodded, not asking further. Then she turned back inside the room and disappeared behind the curtain. A few seconds later, she returned ;with a slip of parchment in her hand.
"This," she said, handing it to him, "is a transport note. With this, you'll be permitted to take a carriage from the estate. It'll save you time."
Li Wei accepted it with both hands, bowing deeply."Thank you. Truly."
She only nodded once, then turned back toward her room.
Li Wei didn't waste a second. He turned and left swiftly, the paper held tight in his palm, the weight of it suddenly lighter than the weight on his heart. He was going.
To Ying.
To keep his promise.
To make things right.
And for now he is going to get her sister from the Wicked Zhi family..