He stood there silent for a while, just staring. No weapons drawn. I guess I did the same, relaxed back into his couch, his beer in my hand, practically empty. The condensation wetting my fingers.
"Do you know me?" I asked, unsure what to expect.
"Should I?" he replied, voice firm.
"Maybe not, but we knew each other once, just under different names than our own." I drank the last of the beer and set the bottle on the floor beside the couch.
He didn't respond, just waited, maybe giving me time to explain.
"You knew me as Subject X-13. A weapon of Hydra."
His face filled with anger and confusion instantly.
"I'm no longer with Hydra. I was like you, a slave to their will."
His eyes lowered, searching his memory for an answer he might not have.
"I remember, some" he said quietly, eyes lifting to meet mine again.
I was surprised. I didn't think he would.
"Want to sit? We have a lot to talk about, like I said."
I gestured to the spot beside me, but he didn't move, just leaned back against the opposite wall, arms crossed.
His muscles bulged even under that thick black jacket. "What do you want? I don't do that stuff anymore."
"I know. Neither do I. I got out before you, actually. Sorry I couldn't come back for you, I had other priorities. Do you remember what those are?"
His eyebrow arched slightly.
"Do you remember what they made you do to me?" I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees.
He licked his lips, biting down on the lower one. "Did I hurt you?"
"You didn't want to."
"But I did… didn't I."
His eyes were filled with pain. Remorse.
"Yes."
"I'm sorry," he whispered, gaze falling again.
"Don't be. It wasn't really you. Besides… you gave me the most wonderful thing I could have ever hoped for."
His brow furrowed, confusion etched across his face.
"They made you… breed me."
His face twisted in disgust and horror. The words barely left his mouth. "What?"
He bit his lip again, hard enough this time to draw blood.
"It worked. We have a child."
He slid down the wall until he was sitting on the floor, hands running through his long hair. I gave him a minute. He needed it.
The silence sat heavy between us. Every time he looked like he might speak, the words disappeared.
Finally, he managed one: "Where?"
"She's asleep. In your bedroom. I don't let her get far from me, ever, so… yeah. She's here."
His eyes widened and locked onto the closed bedroom door.
"Her name is Mira. She's four."
Confusion crossed his face again.
"We were blipped," I explained.
He exhaled sharply, resting his face in his gloved hands, elbows balanced on his knees.
Honestly… he was taking this better than I expected. I was prepared for him to shoot me a few times before asking why I was here. Or call me a liar. Though I guess that could still happen.
"So, look, I get this is a lot. I can take her and go back to our motel. We can come back later, give you time to figure out how you feel about all this."
I stood to leave, but he spoke before I could take a step.
"I remember."
I spun around.
"You didn't move. Or… couldn't. Something in me knew it was wrong. But I couldn't stop myself. I'm so sorry." His voice cracked, pain written all over his face.
"It's okay," I whispered.
"No," he said, shaking his head. "It's not okay. None of it was."
He was right. I didn't argue.
It took me years to move on, and honestly, I'm not sure I ever did. I just bottled it all up for Mira's sake. Took out the rest of it in Madripoor.
Can you ever really heal from something like that?
"I have a daughter?" he asked, still dazed.
"Yeah. She's, um… really smart. Sweet. She has your eyes, your face, your hair… Kind of just a mini-you. A girl version."
A smile pulled at his lips through all the pain in his eyes.
"Mira," he whispered. I barely heard it.
"She's still asleep, I think. Do you want to see her?"
"Can I?" He leapt to his feet.
"Yeah. She wants to meet you, too."
I opened the bedroom door slowly. She was passed out on her stomach, tablet beside her. I'd draped my coat over her, and one of his pillows was under her head.
I leaned against the dresser at the foot of the bed. He stood in the doorway, frozen, like he was afraid to step closer.
To think, someone so tiny could bring two super soldiers to their knees just by existing.
What a powerful little thing she is.
After a few minutes, he moved. Crouched beside the bed, staring at her little sleeping face like he was trying to memorize every detail.
"She's beautiful," he murmured.
Somehow, watching them made me smile.
Maybe it was knowing Mira wouldn't just have me from now on.
Maybe because he looked… happy.
Maybe because, for the first time in a long time, I felt like I could breathe again.
We stayed there like that for a while. Him watching her. Me watching both of them.
Eventually, I saw it: the sun was starting to set.
"We have to go back. I promise I'll bring her to see you again," I said, stepping toward her.
But he moved quickly, extending an arm in front of me.
"Stay here. Please."
"Are you sure?"
He nodded. "I don't have a lot here, but I'll get whatever you need." His eyes searched mine, pleading.
Damn those baby blues. They are good.
"Okay. If, you're sure."
"I'm sure." His gaze shifted back to her, then to me.
"What do you guys need?"
"Nothing. We're okay for now. Let her sleep, she's basically down for the night, which means she'll be up in the middle of it." I eased back toward the door.
"Okay," he whispered, still crouched there, watching her.
"Barnes, come on. Let her sleep," I whisper-yelled, motioning him to follow.
He slipped out quietly, stealing one last look at her as I closed the door behind us.