It was a wild night for Kintsugi. They had a few rounds, and they pretty much milked the Amazonian royalty they and Comtalc had preyed upon for all they were worth.
Kintsugi rose from a four-poster bed, and as he stood up, the bedsheet tangled around his striped body unwrapped. He picked up his jockstrap, put them on, and when he reached the glass window, he joined Comtalc, who was watching the waves crash on the sandlot. Comtalc was sipping prosecco.
Judging by the sun's position, it was already late morning when he woke up. He took a swig of liquor as he gazed out the glass window at the stunning reflection of Princess Dianara. She was stretching, and from the window, her two circular orbs glistened.
"Good morning, boys," the princess greeted. "The morning encounter with you two looks lovely."
The two manslayers felt a stirring in response to what they witnessed, but suddenly their panels popped up.
•••
MISSION
- Head to planet Kepler 261 and manslaughter the man named Al Kel.
•••
Another new task awaited Kintsugi, and he was confident that, like his past missions, he would handle this one with ease. However, at this point, he couldn't shake off the arousal he felt due to the Musk scent he was possessing.
Under Kintsugi and Comtalc's guidance, Dianara made her way to the pool terrace. Despite having just risen, the princess was more than willing to go along with their plan. Time was of the essence, given the mission on the horizon. Kintsugi exuded a raw, animalistic energy, much like a stallion in his prime.
They pounded her on the daybed, they banged her while floating in the water, and even inside the bathroom, they sandwiched the princess. The semen from the two cutthroats served as sunscreen for the princess.
Kintsugi and Comtalc headed to the Upper Echelon together. After parting ways with Comtalc in the Lobby of Doors, Kintsugi stood before a multilateral-shaped door that led to Planet Kepler. He turned the knob, stepped through, and as the door closed, it malfunctioned. Kintsugi's systems failed, plunging him into a distorted reality where even his vision was warped.
Static filled Kintsugi's ears as he felt himself plummeting into a void, losing all sense of control. Monaco's words were unintelligible to him. His panel's display had devolved into a confusing puzzle.
The impact sent him crashing to the ground. Even with his durable tissue-based sheathing, the pain was excruciating, and he yearned for some soothing ointment to ease his aching body.
The ground he landed on was peculiar, adorned with vibrant images. It was as if he had stepped into a Van Gogh painting, with the images rendered in impasto or cloisonism. Yet, the surroundings were shrouded in darkness. He tried reaching out to Monaco again, but the response was curt.
"Sorry, I can't assist you right now." The reply was unusual, and when he checked his panel, the only message displayed was: "System under maintenance."
"Damn, what's going on?" he muttered in frustration.
Deciding to walk while gripping his dagger, and with nothing appealing in the dark surroundings, he focused on studying the images on the ground. Each image told a story - stories that actually happened before Planet Kepler became a work of art.
Kintsugi stood frozen as he caught a whiff of a strong, pungent smell, reminiscent of solvents like turpentine or mineral spirits. When he turned around, he saw a being that resembled a human form.
It was the same height as him, with violet skin. The being was bald, and its face featured only one prominent organ - a large, singular eye. It wore a mystical, sentient golden cloak and burgundy and royal blue robes, exuding an otherworldly aura.
This Keplerian seemed to be the only one left in this world, or rather, in this universe.
"I know you're tired from your journey here, tell me, what kind of refresher would you like?" it said in a friendly voice. As it opened its palms, Kintsugi's favorite drinks suddenly materialized: bourbon, carbonated drink, and coffee.
"Since you're still jet-lagged, it's better if you drink this chamomile tea. It promotes relaxation and improves sleep quality." It summoned a round table and two chairs, then sat down, gesturing for Kintsugi to take a seat.
"No, thanks," Kintsugi declined, observing the being's movements. "Who are you, and what happened to this world?"
The being gestured for Kintsugi to wait while it sipped its tea. It would only answer Kintsugi's questions if he sat down across from it. Eventually, Kintsugi relented and took a seat.
"The answer to your question isn't complicated, but it would take us about a month or more to go through all the details. If you'd like, I could write a novel about it, and you could just read it. Anyway, just call me Professor Kooky."
Kintsugi slammed his fist on the table. "Just give me the important details or the conclusion itself."
Professor Kooky chuckled at Kintsugi's outburst. "You're quite hot-headed, aren't you? I thought people like you were taught to be patient."
Kintsugi was taken aback, wondering how this Keplerian knew so much about him, including the existence of Cyberclassical Cutthroats. After finishing its tea, it pulled out something from below. It placed a box in front of Kintsugi.
"If only you knew how promiscuous you are. You have sex with just anyone. You ejaculate your multiversal sperm into just any fallopian tube. That's why, here, I'll give you a box of condoms so you can practice safe sex and not impregnate more women. One box for you, and one box for your friend."
Kintsugi coughed and shifted uncomfortably in his seat, taken aback by the Keplerian's words. Despite his surprise, he didn't appreciate being spoken to so bluntly.
"What else do you know about me?" Kintsugi asked. Professor Kooky leaned back in his chair, swiveling back and forth as if sitting in a rotating office chair.
"I know a lot about you," he replied casually. "Just by looking at you, I can tell everything about your being."
Kintsugi stood up abruptly, grabbing his dagger and pointing it at Professor Kooky, who was stroking his imaginary mustache.
"Are you afraid of failing in this mission?" Professor Kooky asked. "If you fail, the headmaster of your academy will feed you to his hundred-headed dragons, and you'll only be resurrected when you become their feces."
Professor Kooky chuckled at the expression on Kintsugi's face. "I can read your mind. I'm not the Supreme Ruler, whom you've never seen. Although you can hear his baritone voice, he has no plans to reveal himself. My power is limited to this universe, but the Supreme Ruler's power is multiversal, like your sperm."
"I've already introduced myself to you, and you forgot the part where you were rude for not introducing yourself. But I can refresh your memory. And listen carefully, because you'll figure out something that will appall you."
Kintsugi's dagger remained pointed at Professor Kooky, but the Keplerian's words piqued his interest, particularly since he knew nothing about his true identity. His gaze dropped to the floor, where images began to flicker and swirl, eventually coalescing into a single image: a mother carrying a wooden basket with a sleeping infant inside.
"You were just an infant when your mother left you by the river, but she had a reason for doing so. The Pharaoh, believed to be divine rulers, held significant power and authority in society. One night, he had a nightmare that the one who would replace him on the throne was born. Fearing he might be overthrown, he ordered the slaughter of all newborn boys in his domain with the help of his guards. They conducted a thorough search and assassination, but luckily, among all those hidden, you were the only one who survived."
His mother hung a necklace around his neck, and on its wooden pendant was engraved his true name, 'Sa neb-khut.' Based on the forming image, a man found the basket that held him.
Kintsugi recognized the aura, posture, and attire – it was a Cyberclassical Cutthroat. This professional was the one who took him in and raised him, becoming his first teacher and training him to sharpen his survival and killer instincts. All of this was in preparation for his entrance exam to the Upper Echelon. However, in the final part of the exam, Kintsugi was required to kill the person most dear to him. When Kintsugi saw the image of himself holding the corpse of the man who raised him, tears streamed down his face.
"You don't know all of this because your memories before becoming a trainee were erased," Professor Kooky continued, while Kintsugi's mind was filled with questions.
"A Cyberclassical Cutthroat like you was created and trained to be a multiversal and multidimensional assassin slave. Beyond that, you're capable of time travel. Typically, your tasks involve killing or saving lives, but in your case, your missions mostly involve killing, and sometimes even more heinous acts. You've committed genocide and burned entire planets to ashes. A Cyberclassical Cutthroat is far from ordinary beings. I'd say you're like gods – gods bound to obey a manipulative ruler."
"The Supreme Ruler's expectations of you are sky-high, and as his steadfast followers, you strive to deliver your best in every mission. Even as a delinquent, you won't let yourself become a monumental letdown. Mission success brings rewards, and your kill points – convertible to currency – climb with every target taken down. But beware: the more kill points you rack up, the higher the price on your head."
But among all the questions disturbing him, one question stood out for Kintsugi: 'Who exactly is this Professor Kooky?' However, for now, he wanted to accomplish his mission.
"I've listened to all your stories, and now let's get back to why I'm here in your world. I don't need to explain it to you; you already know. I think I can trust you, so I'm asking for a favor – can you tell me where Al Kel is?"
"I don't know where Al Kel is right now," Professor Kooky replied seriously. Kintsugi wasn't pleased and questioned the Keplerian's ability. "But he left a story for those searching for him, and this story will give you the answer."
Professor Kooky stood up and walked. Kintsugi followed him. As they walked, houses, infrastructures, and trees gradually rose up. Keplerians casually strolled along the road, minding their own businesses, although they couldn't be seen.
They arrived at a university, in a classroom where a male Keplerian was teaching his students. It had a gentle face, a kind demeanor, and above all, it was intelligent.
"That Keplerian is the one you're looking for."