We would have dinner, and we might get onto some alcohol, even though Ezra was a minor. I could get him really drunk, and I could rape…have wild sex with him, and I could cuck his girlfriend.
No, Ezra said he liked someone, but he didn't clarify if they were together or not. Anyway, morals aren't crucial if two people are madly in love.
"I'm here, Craycray~ Sorry for the wait." Ezra looked as if God were a girl, and she molded a perfect man to satisfy all her mental and physical needs.
"I... I just came, too."
"Let's wait for you to finish your cigarette."
"Ah, sorry..."
"It's alright! I'm completely fine with that." Ezra's smile always made me wet. "I never correct people's thoughts or actions, but I did to Craycray last time, and I felt awkward doing that after going back home. Well, smoking is a personal habit, anyways."
Pollen didn't like the idea that I would give up smoking for this date, but she helped me with makeup and dressing. I wore a black sweater inside a brown jacket with boxy boxes, as well as a pair of blue jeans.
"You look beautiful, Craycray.
Shit, I almost came!
Today's schedule includes PowerDragon Mall's CD store, hanging around the mall, and dinner. I had six hundred in my Uschat Pay. If I run out of money, I must find a mute woman and rob her ASAP.
I'd never been to this CD store. It sold iconic golden hits, albums by seminal artists, and Western CDs, which Western ones only occupied one-third of the store. Either way, I normally needed coffee more than whisky during the daytime. Dunno if this was for everyone, too.
"Fuck..." I glowered at the long line but immediately turned to Ezra. "Sor… Sorry."
"It's...alright!" He did look surprised. "Cursing can be a communicative tool, and it's fun to say those words. I say them, too, sometimes."
"Okay."
"...Is it because I chided you last time that you're self-conscious?"
"No, it's just because a great night till morning today will happen."
"I'm sorry about that." He apologized, which I didn't expect.
"You… You don't need to apologize! I mean, I know what I… Palakala said what I say is not um…not always appropriate for people at your age."
The guy in front of us frowned at me. I would kick him in the balls if Ezra weren't here.
"Craycray, may I know…a little more about you before we go to the music store?" Ezra smiled a lot in school, according to Pollen, but he didn't smile much at all.
"Of course!"
The CD store and cafe were connected, but the cafe only had outdoor seating. I instantly lit my second cigarette in this hour.
"I would like to tell her to smoke less, but smoking is a personal thing that doesn't have to be corrected…right?"
"So, um...my mom died when I was seven."
Ezra goggled.
"And my dad was in jail until early last year. You met him last week."
He covered his mouth.
"And I had to raise my little sister. Oh, and the rumors about my dad were a little…let's say, irritating to see."
"Craycray..."
"It's not a pleasant story, ey? But, compared to many on the internet, I'm not hapless like—"
"That is…horrible."
"I... I mean... It's alright."
"No! That's not alright. What happ… But… Your father…" He was caring for me? That would be only half normal. "Where is your sister now?"
"No. Please don't go that way." I reached both of my palms across the table and buried my head between my straightened arms.
"Ah, uh... Which way?"
"I don't...like to talk about my sister." I dropped flat on the thin metal table. "Sorry."
"...No, I'm sorry." His expression was out of my sight. Well, I didn't want to raise my head until I sipped my coffee again. "May I ask what you are feeling?"
"Just normal. Sadness is a happy thing for most, though." My voice blurred in my arms.
"Hey um..."
"..."
"Saying 'if you need anything, tell me,' is so perfunctory and useless."
"But, you know?" I got up and gulped my coffee. "Music cheered me up. If I didn't have music, I might become those strangely depressed and crying-all-the-time kind of guys. Well, I cry uncontrollably because of my unique tear glands."
"Hm."
"Wanna hear the album that especially cheered me up?"
His expression said it all. Electronic dance music, EDM, was not what he expected. Aya Aya, people shittalked about EDM and claimed it had destroyed modern music, but they were all complicit in giving it the attention, click rate, and initial positive comments that it didn't deserve. However, early EDMs were NEXT LEVELLLLL!!!
"I love this. If it weren't because of 'Knife Party' and 'Zomboy,' I don't think I would enjoy Radiohead's 'Ok Computer.'" I placed the disk in the store's public CD player and gave Ezra the public headphones. Dang, the terms "public use" were getting me excited.
The documentary "lyrics" about centipedes made Ezra tilt his head. When the beat dropped, he tilted his head almost nine degrees with enlarged pupils. I giggled and paused the song that finished its first hook.
"There's no need to listen to the full song. My problem with Knife Party is that their songs are a little repetitive, like 'Zedd.' However, 'Skrillex' and Zomboy aren't."
Ezra never appreciated EDM, but when Zomboy's melody and hardcore beat dropped, he automatically nodded with the beat.
"Woah. This is unlike any EDM I'd listened to."
"Because DJs these days use five percent of the effort compared to our OG DJs."
Youngsters' impression of EDM was one lead, one synth, one bass, or one single stuff that could be built in five minutes. How were DJs using an entire or two years to produce one album that ants would shit on?
If I must say, Zomboy incorporated the most complexity. Dozens of sounds must have their uniqueness and be created from the original sound waveforms, with numerous effects layered on top of them. That was why EDMs were not trash back then, as DJs were spending more time on their music and not chainsmoking.
"From modern phenomena, what type of songs make people move on their own?" I quizzed.
"Umm... Electronic! Yes."
"Yep. People bang their heads in clubs naturally, even if they're lonely nerds who clench their anime wifu pillows twenty-four seven."
"Her primitive self is emanating when she's pumped…"
"And then, I got into these!"
The Mandopop section was next. The 21st century's favorites, Jay Chou, David Tao, Leehom Wang, and JJ Lin, I didn't need to introduce their songs as every old and young knew them.
"Wooo, I love this, and especially this album," Ezra blabbered. "I'm surprised that you would recommend these pop mainstreams, though."
"They have their reasons to be popular. People try to look special, so they say unpopular music is real music. That's just pathetic, hahaha!"
"I agree. Imagine the artists being called bad because they're popular."
"Jay Chou thinks of themes that no one ever considered. For example, a movie-like lyric from a murder case to finding the murderer, to the detectives being taken down by the murderer. And hey, the legendary Brian McKnight loves David Tao!"
Jay Chou taught me the grandeur of instrumental production and refined poetic lyrics. David Tao and Leehom Wang taught me that "rhythm is king, and melody is dead." However, I thought chord progressions were just supports for beautiful melodies, and melodies were the least technical part of a song.
Fuck you, Gods. Why did you ever make the world think that way? Apollo and the artist I would show to Ezra are above all Gods.
"You know what? Absolutely!" Ezra smiled with that man's face on the album cover.
"I wouldn't be into Radiohead without him." Because I held the album of Khalil Fong.
Khalil Fong was in the mainstream, but perhaps he was swimming while others were riding jet skis down the stream. That didn't stop him from making the most unthinkable soul music. Funk, R&B, and all sorts of blues; every genre he trod didn't challenge him.
I would argue that the sheets he composed were more unexpected than those of many early blues musicians. His skills were on par with Stevie Wonder and Michael Jackson. Still, hoggish slobs wouldn't make the effort to walk out and order delicacies. Greasy and repulsive food would always be their preference.
"But, those who are willing to make the effort are spoiled by Khalil Fong's unconventional chords and melodies. Only a few can outclass him, and guess what?"
Ezra knew precisely what I meant. The store didn't have a British pop section. All indie and art rock were assorted in the alternative section. Thus, Ezra grabbed his favorite album.
That's right. EDMs moved my body. The prevalent but true and native musicians taught me the individual components of music. Khalil Fong displayed the possibility of music. Next, a band that did everything so well, yet still unleashed more possibilities, was Radiohead.
"They are impeccable. For me, "not one of the," they are THE BEST musicians ever." If anyone murders one of Radiohead's members like the murderer of John Lennon, I will forever incarcerate and torture him or her and feed them feces.
"The best? Not any classical musicians or founders of genres?" Ezra questioned.
"I didn't listen to much from The Beatles or jazz musicians, so Radiohead is my personal best."
"I dislike most of the songs in 'The King of Limbs,' though. Dumdum loves it."
"Yeah~ I love that, too. It's an IDM album—Intelligent Dance Music. I think it's more euphonic than some songs in 'Hail to the Thief.'"
"Dang. You and Dumdum have many of the same thoughts."
"Their songs and Sly Rabbit…"
"Mhm?"
"Are what taught me about music's vibes."
The CD players had multiple sockets, but only one pair of headphones was provided. It was like how women have multiple holes, but only one plug was used. Ezra knew, so he brought his own headphones.
Whenever the piano joins MIDWAY playing the CHORDS, a grander picture appears in my head. A perfect example would be Radiohead's "You and Whose Army."
Ezra followed my lead, closing his eyes to indulge in the quiet and Lo-Fi produced atmosphere, as well as the lead singer's voice blurred by a paper bag around his mic. Without paying attention to the lyrics, the atmosphere already encircled us, but the ride cymbal broke our cool.
"On the stage, the lighting spots the singer with a mic stand, and begins to flash distortedly."
And then, the piano pressed the chords with powerful velocity. The camera that captured darkness cut to the shot of the pianist's hands. Then, it was slowly pulled away when the lighting shone again, revealing all the band members one by one.
"Why? Because all instruments are presented, and the production is no longer Lo-Fi." I imagined.
"Woah... Why can I see an orchestra playing behind the rock instrumentalists?" Ezra smiled with his eyes closed, hands on the headphones.
"That's great! The piano controlled the syncopation, and it's the most conspicuous chord player. The synth, however, is coating everything!"
"That was awesome!!" Ezra was shaking like he injected Happy Water in his brain.
"What pose do you think the pianist was playing in?" And I was the cop who slapped this drug addict sober.
"Pose...?"
"Yep! You know how jazz pianists close their eyes and face the ceiling when they undergo the free musical notes, appreciating the pieces they put together. Classical pianists sit straight with their eyes on their fingers, playing the demure musical notes. So, what pose was the rock pianist in when the grand musical notes played?"
"I...don't know."
"I noticed this from Palakala, actually. He's an well-rounded pianist, and he does the jazz pose when improvising. But, 'You and Whose Army' isn't free, but emotions are emitting."
"So, he closes his eyes?"
"Yes." I mimicked Palakala's piano pose, arching my back slightly, but my head all the way down, vertically facing the keyboard. With my eyes shut, my relaxed and almost straightened finger pressed down. "Palakala said he can control the velocity better when leaning forward.
And now, as an audience under the stage, Ezra saw the lead singer in a tuxedo with a mic stand in the center. On his center right was the guitarist, on the center left was the bassist. Slightly sitting behind and to the extreme left was the pianist. Further back and the extreme right was the drummer. Behind them was an orchestra seated on the stage stairs. Everyone's pose was vivid. The pianist, drummer, and string players weren't covered by the guitarists up front.
"Wow... So, you're also knowledgeable in stage direction?" Ezra asked.
"Aw, no. I've only seen a few school performances. The song just gives me a vibe of how the song should be performed."
"That's amazing."
From "2+2=5," the chord, lead, and backup vocal, left an impression in our head with the loud percussion's steady rhythm. Hence, when every instrument paused for a beat, when an unsettling guitar tone was introduced, I jerked forward to Ezra. He flinched as if his crush caught him acting sweetly around another girl.
"Music vibe doesn't just make me move, but it gives me pictures, too." I could anticipate most songs I haven't heard yet, so even the new songs give me pictures.
"Also, when you tap your foot, that to me is a subtle yet memorable and charming little motion. When do you do that usually?" Ezra just called me charming! My mouth, my eyes, and every round hole of mine opened up!!
"I don't know, actually. I just do that instinctively."
"There must be a pattern! I want to find the pattern, because that is mesmerizing of you!!"
I was so ready. Get that plug ready, Ezra, my holes were warmed up for you!!
We literally went through songs just to see when my feet react. Finally, we realized that it was when the closed hi-hat changed into an open hi-hat.
"Woah~ That's kind of just in my blood, I think." I didn't know tapping my foot was such a noticeable motion for Ezra. For him, I would tap my feet until they fell off. "It is an underrated progress that many overlook."
"It's amazing!! When the closed hi-hat's compressed, 'tsk, tsk, tsk,' turn into loud splashes of the opened hi-hat, that's one of the simplest but best progressions a song can have!" He played "Letdown" from Radiohead.
I never realized, but when the hi-hat opened in the middle of the second verse, when he tapped his foot, that erased every lewd thought of mine. People say pretty pretty love songs are perfect for confessions, but when those alluring motions and outstanding music are displayed together, that was something to kill best friends for.
"Dang! It's giving me so many ideas!!" Ezra smiled like a summer beach boy who executed complete surfing for the first time.
"Who could have thought? Such little movements can have such big effects."
That concluded my musical journey. Sly Rabbit was just another great band that did a great job in everything, nothing too special, but we couldn't even have music that makes no fault these days.
"Twin Death is an album of codependency…" Ezra has studied that album thoroughly. "Is Craycray and her little sister's relationship what relates her to the album so much?"
"Twin Death is a gay album, that's why Pakalaka loves it! Well, minors shouldn't be an excuse for not understanding it. I thought male minors have plenty of dicks in their lives already." I was having a blast today.
No, Radiohead wasn't the end of my musical journey, because I was getting into earlier blues and jazz now. Those were the most complex and technical songs ever. My father would agree. He said the terrible jazz musicians would transition into rock for shortcuts.
"Our school has a brilliant…like…seriously one-of-a-kind jazz drummer, but he's quite loyal to his own little informal band that never participates in any school performances or competitions. That irritates many people. Interestingly enough, his name is a combination of the two most popular singers in China, David Tao and Jay Chou. His name is David Chou!"
"Honestly, say what you want about music, but jazz musicians…? They are not who we want to provoke."
The music store was a perfect date spot for us, music nerds. It was early to be hungry. Hence, the tiny dessert, accessories, and arcade shops became our destinations.
"Wowwwww... I never knew there was a pet store in this mall." I looked at the puppy with tender, perhaps gamy, and sweet flesh. A little golden retriever almost bit me. Why was that?
"Awww~ If dogs are removed from this world, remove me, too. I don't want to live in a world without dogs." He easily picked up the golden retriever, and it licked his cheek and swung its tail. When he approached me with it, it grunted with visible fangs.
"Well, I'm more into cats." I should've been the one licking Ezra's face. "I envy them. I don't want to do anything except meow meow."
"She's very cute~" He beamed.
(Date her then, bitch.)
"Well…she is also the complete opposite of the girl I like."
There was an anime store. I enjoyed reading manga. Surprise? I didn't enjoy big bads killing without purpose or the justice losing, since they are fictional worlds and are more normal than the real world.
Movies, however, I loved when 200.145897 liters of fake blood were used. My idol? It was The Collector or Freddy, but I aspired to become Jigsaw in terms of his genius, not his abnormal ideals.
"Dumdum loves manga, too," Ezra said.
"That's great! It is important to see many visual arts to produce good music. That's why I can picture with sounds so easily, because of all the movies I watched. And transferring that to manga? I can imagine the soundtrack when reading."
"That...is impressive, and it makes sense." He gaped.
(Date her then, bitch.)
"Can you go away…?"
We went to a Japanese restaurant for dinner. The fishiness and vinegary daikon stank smelled like… If you, readers, are familiar with my character, you'll know what I wanted to say.
Ezra had a wealthy family, yet somehow, he wasn't a fucked, arrogant high school boy who bullies and flips classmates' skirts and tells his rich daddy to clear the aftermath. He insisted on paying, even ordering the second most expensive sushi platter, but I was the big sister, Craycray!
"You can buy me a drink. I would love to have a drink with you~" His softly tilted head, his tender tones, and his curvy eyes… "But please drink responsibly, Craycray."
"O... Okay!" If I sacrifice Palakala to the gods, may I date this man in return?
He loved his first experience with sake, but half a bottle down, he still wasn't drunk. We chatted about our favorite movies, about how I learned karate and Jeet Kung Do, about how lenient his parents are, unlike Dumdum's parents.
"His parents expect highly of him."
"He's kinda dumdum, though."
"He's great in school and basketball, but he called me yesterday, saying that he's quitting basketball for music."
"Woah, really?" I didn't expect such devotion.
"Yeah, he recently read a manga called 'Blue Giant' and got drowned in music."
"Aw, I know that one, but didn't read it. I'm happy for him, though."
"Hmm... I'm also on the basketball team, and we lost one of our star players. I'm not considering quitting, though."
"When your desire builds up and rings like an orchestra's triangle, you'll sacrifice all to chase it. I understand how Dumdum feels, and knowing this…" When people are loyal to their desires, I always wish them the best. "He will for sure become a huge musician."
Why don't people move their arses? Why do people desire but never conduct? Dumdum can do it, I knew it.
"I guess you're right."
"Mhm."
"I want to find my commitment, too."
After dinner, I put the minimal leftovers in the restaurant's takeaway box.
"She doesn't waste anything. Wow…"
(Date her then, bitch.)
"Hey, Craycray, can you…" While waiting at the bus station, he called me. "I don't want to judge her defects, but knowing all these beautiful sides of her…"
"Yes?"
"If you need anything, please tell me. There are things that I don't prefer to see from you…"
I would change anything for him, but why was he suddenly saying this?
"But, today, I learned that you'd gone through a cascade of rough incidences, and all the unique values from you that not many possess." He closed his eyes and shook his head. "I don't want to see you in trouble. I don't want you to be harmed again."
"O... Okay." Was my face pink or just crimson red?
"I would like to help you in every way possible. I think there's a way for us to meet more often, and as a reciprocation of my help…"
"I…"
"Will you join our school band?"
...
My name is Craycray. I became Ezra and Dumdum's band's bassist.