Although, I feel like Diarmuid's adoration for Miwa is increasing by the day...
Well, getting along is a good thing, so I'll ignore it for now.
"Okay. Alice and I take the right. Miwa's team takes the left. Vali's team goes straight down the center. If anything happens, contact us via comms. We'll come running immediately."
About thirty minutes after parting ways with Miwa and the others.
"Hey, hey, Master."
"What is it, Alice-san?"
"Why did we end up in this situation again?"
Alice and I spoke in calm, gentle tones.
If you only heard our voices, you'd think we were sipping tea on a porch somewhere.
Ah, if only we could live such a peaceful life.
Is it wrong for me to think that?
Is this situation a punishment for me daring to have such a wish?
Grandpa in heaven, please tell me.
What do I have to do to live a quiet life?
"GWAAAAAAH! RUN! RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAAAAN!"
"I am running, you idiot!"
Our screams echoed through the dim corridor!
We were sprinting with everything we had to escape the thing closing in from behind!
RUMBLE, RUMBLE, RUMBLE...!
Making a deafening roar as it rolled toward us was a gigantic sphere!
It had been chasing us endlessly for a while now!
"Damn you, Asem! What kind of cliché trap is thiiiiis?!"
"Issei! Do something about it!"
"If I could, I would have done it ages ago! Besides, this is your fault for pulling that string! It was obviously a trap! It was blatantly a trap!"
"Do you not know the saying, 'Why do people pull strings? Because the string is there'?"
"I don't know it! I've never heard that saying! I know it for 'mountains,' but not for 'strings'!"
Ah, dammit!
Why is this happening?!
Why did we storm into enemy territory only to be cornered by a gag-manga trap?!
The sphere rolling from behind... even when I tried to destroy it, it didn't even get a scratch.
Asem probably made it with some powerful spell, but...
If that's true, just how much effort is he putting into these stupid pranks?!
Just then, a voice came over the corridor speakers.
[Pfft... Hahahaha! I-I didn't think you'd actually pull that string! A-As expected of the Serious Breaker! Ack... hee hee... m-my stomach hurts from laughing!]
"Shut uuuuuup! Asem, you bastard! Who sets up such a basic trap nowadays?!"
[Because these things are a staple of dungeons, right? Oh, heads up, a new trap is coming.]
At that moment, the stone I stepped on sank with a clunk.
And then—
The ceiling tore open, and a massive amount of spears and swords came raining down!
And to make matters worse, they were all Holy Swords and Demonic Swords!
A falling spear stabbed into the ground right next to my foot!
"Kyaa! You stepped on a trap too!"
"No time to argue! Run! Just run! That huge thing is still rumbling toward us!"
A rain of blades from above.
A giant sphere closing in from behind.
And to top it off, the sphere didn't break even when I blasted it with Agni!
We have no choice but to run!
"Using so much power on something so stupid! Do you think you have that much leeway?!"
[Devoting everything even to things that seem stupid... that is what it means to be a Professional.]
"Deep! But that's a quote we don't need right now! You're just a slacker gamer!"
[You know me well. That's right, when I play RPGs, I'm the type who spends a lot of time on minigames!]
"Who cares?! IDIOOOT!"
My screams were in vain; the ball was still rumbling right behind us.
Somewhere... is there anywhere we can escape to...?
As I scanned for a way out, a single door entered my vision.
A door on the right wall!
"Alice! Dive into that door!"
"Hnh!"
Reacting to my voice, Alice wrapped herself in white lightning and leaped at the door with unprecedented speed.
Alice threw the door open, and I dove in after her—
"Haa... haa... haa... Why is this happening..."
Alice and I were on our hands and knees, gasping for breath.
We had managed to escape the giant sphere by diving into the room... but the exhaustion was unreal.
Mostly mental exhaustion...
"I... will never pull a dangling string again..."
Yeah, please don't.
I never want to go through a development like that again.
I'm absolutely done with falling for traps that are too cliché to be real.
Though, the guy setting up traps you only see in cartoons is a piece of work too...
He's definitely enjoying this.
He plans to enjoy this to the bitter end...
Once my breathing settled, I looked around.
It was a spacious room.
About the size of a party venue in the Underworld.
A gorgeous chandelier hung from the ceiling, the floor was marble, the walls were painted white, and unlike the hallway, the interior was quite bright.
How do we get to Asem from here...?
Actually, where even is he?
"Is there a map or something?"
"Of course not. This is enemy territory, remember?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
Even when I expand my senses to search for ki, I can't pinpoint Asem's location.
I can track Miwa and Vali's groups, but...
Is there some mechanism in this castle blocking him?
Or is he completely suppressing his presence so we can't sense him?
Either way, nothing starts until we find him.
Just as we were about to move from the room, a presence appeared.
"Long time no see, Mr. Hero. And the Princess. No, wait, should I say Happy New Year? It was last month when we met."
Appearing with a laid-back voice much like Asem's was a beauty with dark skin and long white hair—Vika.
Vika stood in the center of the room, smiling at us.
I spoke to her.
"Happy New Year... feels a bit late for that, but yeah, been a while. Are you alone?"
"Yes, that's right. Just now, Razul went to... Vali-kun, was it? That grandson of Uncle Rizevim. He went to him."
So Razul went to Vali.
Bikou is over there too, so it's two-on-one in our favor... but that probably doesn't mean much.
Besides, both Razul and Vali are battle maniacs; they're probably just punching each other one-on-one.
Alice took a step forward.
"So? Can we assume you're here to take us on?"
"Well, that's the plan... but even for me, taking on you and the Hero at the same time is tough. If it were on a bed, I wouldn't mind taking on three, though. Should we have a match on the bed instead?"
Vika lifted the hem of her skirt, flashing her voluptuous thighs!
Is she trying to seduce me?!
Does she think I'd fall for such a—
"Are you serious?!"
"Don't react to every little thing! And you're totally falling for it! You lecherous Hero!"
"Guehh!"
A white lightning Alice Punch struck through me!
It hurts like hell, but it's a familiar pain!
Holding back a nosebleed with my hand, I groaned painfully.
"S-Sorry, but we'll pass on the bed..."
"Oh, too bad. ♪ Getting scolded by the Princess after all? Let me guess... The Princess is usually all dere-dere in front of you, right? And you love that gap?"
Heh... she gets it.
My Alice, let me tell you!
Usually, she lazes around or throws punches, but when she gets clingy, she is super cute!
When she asks for a goodnight kiss or a morning kiss... she is pure maiden!
"It's honestly so cute I can't stand it!"
"D-Don't say it out loud... idiot."
Alice grabbed my sleeve, her face flushing red!
This part of her is great too!
Wait, we got sidetracked...
The question was whether Vika could handle both Alice and me.
She says it's tough, but who knows what the reality is.
I feel like Vika and her group still have a trump card they haven't shown us yet.
Vika asked.
"What will you do? I don't mind one, or both?"
The pressure radiating from Vika began to fill the massive room.
With this atmosphere, it feels like she really could fight us both.
Does she have the cards to back that up?
At that moment, Ravel's voice came through my earpiece.
[Issei-sama, it's terrible! Miwa-san is—]
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