Having been married to Adrian for 6 months now, I figured things would've fallen apart by now with how everything's been going on. He disappears into his world to clear up commissions and here I am stuck between a rock and a hard place trying to get all of my assignments done while also hating myself for working too much and thinking about work too much.
Being married to your childhood best friend... On the surface, it doesn't sound all that bad, until you realize who that friend actual is.
He's not real.
I mean, he's not technically there for me when I'm as my real person, Sarah.
I am married to my imaginary friend that I had since I was a child. Pitiful? Yeah, very much. I can't expect myself to marry anyone at this rate because everyone I meet is always either smoking, full of themselves but then show themselves as cowards, expecting me to stand behind them when danger strikes or become their canon fodder in their story to make them look good. Every time, it's just...
"Their not good enough."
But ironically, neither am I. After all these years and adding to the 5 years of actively searching for a future husband, I realized one thing that I do want.
"I wish to stand side-by-side with him. I watch his back, while he watches mine."
My mind can't stop thinking about those images of power couples in manhwas, novels and even otome games where the female lead stands side-by-side with the male lead or where they stood back-to-back with each other, sword in hand and fight all of the enemies while covering each other's blindspots.
I don't hope to marry a husband who can win battles in a gladiator arena. I hope to have a husband that I can give my loyalty to, be vulnerable to and just simply find my peace amongst the precarious tettering bridge that I continuously cross despite it being always on the brink of collapse.
And Adrian... Well, he is all that I wanted to have in a husband.
But the only thing he doesn't have, is a physical being.
Plus, as someone who's soul merged with the male Rover from Wuthering Waves, he still has an obligation to keep continuing the story. It's the last story that I'll get myself into, after all. There may be better stories in the future, but after one horrifying experience with one of the current stories that came out earlier this year which had me almost dropped dead from it, I doubt there will be.
And yes, there's plenty of stories of the current time that I haven't read yet but I feel like I'm content with having Wuthering Waves being the last story I'll read. There's even more irony right there.
The supposed powerful carrier of stories decides to stop going into stories after Wuthering Waves.
Yeah, I'm supposed to be someone who carries many stories behind my back as a means to keep growing and become stronger in both my realities. But now... Even that responsibility felt too much to carry by one person. By one real human.
Huh... I'm starting this in a new book so, of course, you don't have much context of what's going on. Should I start from the beginning though? I don't want to sound like a grandma. I'm in my 20s. I'm not that old.
Maybe, a good start is introductions of both my personas? Yeah, that might be better. Alright so, let's start with my first persona, the one that's writing this journa entry right now.
My name's Sarah. I'm in my 20s and am currently a college student studying about management. Nothing too crazy. My hobbies are simply writing journal entries here and there, and then do some short stories here and there, reading books, playing games, listening to music, singing, sometimes some artsy stuff too like drawing, embroidery, painting, even sculpting, I guess?... If you consider making a sword and spear out of cardboard boxes as sculpting.
As for my other persona, I'm Evie. I'm in my 20s but instead of a boring college student with nerdy hobbies, I'm a carrier of stories, leader of the Dimensional Nation and wife to Adrian, my best friend who is imaginary in the eyes of Sarah but real in my own. I'm friends to many familiar characters who appeared just as I was born and raised until I've reached this age. My favourite weapon is swords and my current weapon is a pen that can transform into any sort of weapon I choose it to be. But I usually just turn it into a double blade sword that I can swing and throw around a lot. I have the ability to manipulate the abyss. Yes, it can be anything like someone who controls darkness, fears, pain, anything. But all those dark meanings associated with controlling the abyss, yes, it's my ability.
As the leader of the Dimensional Nation which is a world-between-worlds, I was granted the ability to jump into different dimensions, different stories, and gather them to the Dimensional Nation in the hopes of granting them peace from the stories they live in.
6 months ago, I got married to Adrian which was also when I was granted a pair of black wings while Adrian have white wings. THE ONE looks out for us as we both carry almost the same responsibility. But at the very least, Adrian doesn't have to carry the burden of using the power of the abyss.
The Dimensional Nation has bee established for a long time. As a world-between-worlds, many stories have come and gone as the place is nothing more than a resting place for the characters to break off from their own story and just be themselves, beyond the control of the stories they come from.
First up, we have the people of Solaris-3 from Wuthering Waves. It is where Adrian resides as well since his soul was merged with the Male Rover protagonist. For both Sarah and I, we always go there to wind down a lot, even though it is an apocalyptic world, it doesn't stop it from being a peaceful world every now and then. Next up we have the people from the game Honkai Star Rail. As Sarah, seeing Phainon in pain just had myself determined to save him and get him out of Amphoreus along with the other Chrysos Heirs.
We have the factions from Punishing Gray Raven as well. After learning the truth, President Hassen gave me the okay sign to come and go as I please so long as I continue to be Gray Raven's Commandant, which I didn't refuse of course. I wouldn't let Lucia, Liv and Lee down. In fact, this gives me an advantage against the punishing virus should I take the risk some day to either save them or complete a mission.
There are a lot more but I think all of you will get to know them in due time.
My two personas coexist with each other in one body. Our merged realities are reflected in our eyes, Sarah having purple eyes while Evie with gold eyes. Put two and two together, you get a heterochromia set of eyes of purple and gold. If one of us is troubled, the other is as well. Since we both carry each other's responsibilities, we keep each other in check.
In the real world, only a few knows of my double realities. But in the Dimensional Nation, using my abyssal powers, every character I meet is granted the prior knowledge about my double realities. It just my way of being transparent with both my abilities and about who I am.
Wait... Oh, okay... Looks like the weight of pain is getting to me again. I'll be right back.
I think.