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Chapter 8 - **Chapter 8: Old Men Talk, Cool Kids Walk**

**(A Tale of Sibling Shenanigans and System Shenanigans)**

*Previously on "The Chronicles of the Ultimate Villainous Big Bro"...*

Qin Feng, our cheeky protagonist, had just leveled up to the *First Layer of the Origin Realm* using his overpowered cheat code—*Thirty-Three Heavens Creation Scripture*. But now, like a gamer stuck on a loading screen, his progress bar froze. Why? Because his ancient cultivation manual was as outdated as Windows XP. Time to upgrade!

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**Scene 1: Gacha Gods, Bless This Mess**

Qin Feng lounged in his courtyard, mentally scrolling through his **"Ultimate Villain System"** interface. His eyes gleamed at his shiny loot: **32,400 Villain Points** and **ONE FREE SPIN** on the *Wheel of OP Bullsh*t*.

"Time to gamble like a Wall Street bro with a Robinhood account!" he cackled, slapping the virtual **"ROLL"** button.

The gacha wheel spun wildly, its sections flashing absurd prizes: **"Super Saiyan God Mode"**, **"Unlimited Starbucks Coffee"**, **"Thor's Hammer (Terms & Conditions Apply)"**, and—*ding!*—the wheel landed on…

**"Sword Art: Sky-Splitting Draw!"**

*BOOM!*

Qin Feng's consciousness got yeeted into a black-and-white samurai flick. A shadowy figure in a trench coat (because *edge*) stood before him. No small talk. Just…*schwing!*

A sword gleamed.

The heavens split.

Qin Feng's soul whimpered. "Dude, save some coolness for the rest of us!"

The technique imprinted itself into his brain like a viral TikTok dance. But there was a catch: His scrawny 12-year-old arms couldn't handle this *"I cut mountains for fun"* move. He needed gains—*stat*.

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**Scene 2: Grandpa Flexes (And Regrets It)**

Enter **Old Man Tenth Ancestor**—a 300-year-old relic with a beard longer than his patience. Picture Dumbledore cosplaying as a kung fu master.

"Ah, my precious great-grandson!" Tenth Ancestor cooed, pinching Qin Feng's cheeks like he was a Thanksgiving turkey. "Let Grandpa teach you *real* cultivation! No more of that 'self-help book' nonsense!"

To flex, Grandpa whipped out his signature move: **"Falling Leaves of Doom"**—an "ancient" technique where he yeeted leaves so hard they diced a boulder into confetti.

"Took me *decades* to master this!" he bragged, stroking his beard smugly.

Qin Feng blinked. "So…it's basically *Fruit Ninja* with extra steps?"

He copied the move instantly, shredding a stone table like it was made of wet tissue.

Grandpa's jaw dropped. "*Wèishénme?!* How?!"

"Skill issue," Qin Feng shrugged, pocketing a **+100 Villain Points** notification for "disrespecting elders."

Grandpa Tenth Ancestor shuffled away, muttering about "Zoomers ruining the sacred art of leaf-throwing."

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**Scene 3: Baby Brother's Plot Armor Arrives**

Suddenly, a squad of geriatric cultivators (the **Qin Clan Council of Old Dudes**) barged into the neighboring courtyard where Qin Feng's baby brother, **Qin Xiao**, was drooling in his crib.

The elders gasped.

"Behold!" one screeched, holding up a dusty scroll titled *"Identifying OP Babies for Dummies"*. "This child has…a **PRIMORDIAL BONE**!"

The room exploded in *Avengers-level* hype.

"A *bone*?!" Qin Feng facepalmed. "That's his cheat code?! I had to grind for *years*, and this milk-drinking gremlin gets a free pass?!"

The system pinged:

**[New Quest Unlocked!]**

**- Mission:** Steal lil' bro's magic skeleton

**- Reward:** **Cosmic Eyes of Hax** (see through walls, clothes, *and* plot holes!)

Qin Feng smirked. "Sorry, kiddo. Sibling rivalry just went *dark mode*."

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**Post-Credits Teaser:**

Meanwhile, in a shadowy dimension…

**The Mysterious Voice:** "Qin Feng's villain era begins. But *who* rigged the gacha wheel…?"

*[Cue dramatic kazoo solo.]*

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