*Crunch!*
A walnut shattered under Qin Feng's sandal as he stomped toward his courtyard. His face twisted like a pretzel dunked in vinegar. "Pfft—what kind of scammy system *is* this?!" he muttered, glaring at the glowing text only he could see.
The System chirped, its voice sugary enough to rot teeth: *[Ding! Host could totally steal Qin Hao's Supreme Bone! It's a win-win! He'll grow a new one! Like lizard tails! Super cool!]*
Qin Feng choked on his spit. "Steal my *baby brother's* bones?! Are you *nuts*? Mom and Dad would skin me alive and turn my hide into a rug!" He shuddered, imagining his mother's legendary "Disappointed Mom Glare™" melting him into a puddle.
*[But Host,破而后立! Break it to remake it! Like Lego!]* the System persisted, its pixels shimmering with mischief.
"*No!* I need… I need…" Qin Feng's eyes darted wildly before landing on a passing servant carrying a tray of dumplings. "...*snacks!* And *quiet!*" He bolted to his room, tripping over a decorative garden gnome (imported from the mysterious West, because rich people).
---
**Five Years Later**
At age eight, Qin Feng had mastered two things:
1) Flexing his eight-pack abs (because why *not* start young?).
2) Being the human embodiment of *stress*.
"*Haaah…*" He exhaled dramatically, submerged in a tub of murky herbal soup that smelled like gym socks marinated in regret. This "Elite Cultivation Spa Day™" was supposed to "strengthen his roots" (whatever *that* meant). All it did was make him crave bubble tea.
*Pop!*
A burst of energy shot from his pores, blowing the tub to splinters. Tenth Ancestor, who'd been napping in the corner, startled awake. "By the heavens! Did you just… *break through* to the Transcendent Realm?!"
Qin Feng struck a superhero pose, towel flapping heroically. "Call me… *Captain Overachiever*."
Tenth Ancestor facepalmed. "Your *five-year-old brother*'s already at Open Mystery Realm Level 5. At this rate, he'll outpace you before he loses his baby teeth."
"*Ugh.*" Qin Feng's eye twitched. Little Hao was like that one kid in class who aces tests while doodling unicorns. *Annoyingly* perfect.
---
**Operation: Troll the Toddler**
Qin Feng stormed toward the family gate, where Hao napped sprawled on the "World's Most Boring Tree" — a crooked oak older than dirt.
"Rise and *shine*, squirt!" Qin Feng flicked his brother's forehead.
Hao blinked awake, cheeks squishy as marshmallows. "*Gege!*" He beamed, launching into a tackle-hug. "Did'ja bring candy?!"
"*Oof—*" Qin Feng staggered. At five, Hao packed the punch of a rabid koala. "No candy! Just… uh… *combat training*!" He hoisted Hao by his overall straps.
"Yay! Spinny kicks!" Hao giggled, legs windmilling wildly.
*Whap!*
A tiny foot connected with Qin Feng's nose.
"*Gah!* Not the face!" Qin Feng stumbled back, dignity in tatters. "Why are you like this?!"
Hao plopped onto the grass, munching a stolen cookie. "Dunno! Wanna see my new move? I call it… *Tornado of Doom*!" He cartwheeled into a hedge.
Nearby servants facepalmed in unison. "*These* are our future leaders?" muttered one, reshuffling the snack tray Hao had raided.
---
**The Real Villain Here? *Genetics*.**
Later, Qin Feng brooded under the Ancestral Hall's chandelier (a gaudy thing that screamed "new money"). Tenth Ancestor materialized beside him, sipping boba.
"Cheer up, kid. You've got the Heavenly Treasure Gourd accelerating your cultivation. Hao's just…" He waved vaguely. "*Built different*."
"Different? He's a *menace*!" Qin Feng groaned. "Yesterday, he 'accidentally' summoned a raincloud over Dad's prized peonies. *While sleepwalking!*"
Tenth Ancestor snorted. "At least he's creative! Remember when you tried to 'cultivate faster' by strapping yourself to a windmill?"
Qin Feng's cheeks burned. "That… was *science*."
"*Bzzt!* Wrong. It was *hilarious*."
---
**Meanwhile, At The World's Lamest Tree…**
Hao snored peacefully, drooling on the oak's bark. Unseen to all, the tree's roots glowed faintly—pulsing in time with the child's heartbeat. A single leaf drifted down, etching symbols into the soil:
*[Supreme Bone: Phase 2 Activated.]*
Somewhere, the System cackled.
---
**Epic Bro Duel Countdown: T-Minus 3 Years**
Qin Feng flopped onto his bed, glaring at the ceiling. "24,000 Villain Points…" He'd earned them mostly by "pranking" Hao (read: filling his shoes with glitter). But for the coveted *Perfected Realm* upgrade? He needed *a million*.
"At this rate," he grumbled, "I'll be 80 before I can shoot laser beams from my *eyes*."
Outside, Hao's laughter echoed as he rode the family's grumpy spirit-beast like a rodeo bull. "*Yeehaw!* Faster, Mr. Fluffy!"
Qin Feng pulled a pillow over his face. "*Why* couldn't I be an only child…?"
---
**Preview of Next Disaster:**
Hao adopts a "pet" lightning spirit (spoiler: it's a thunder god's angry ex). Qin Feng discovers glitter *does* stick to Supreme Bones. Tenth Ancestor invests in earplugs.