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Chapter 82 - Agent Squirrel (I)

"Phew, it sure is windy up here, isn't it, Tippy Toe?" Squirrel Girl asked her furry companion as they landed on the deck of the Shield Helicarrier. Normally, being so high up in the air would have come with various problems, such as altitude sickness and freezing temperatures, but Squirrel Girl didn't have to worry about either, thanks to her new costume. "I really have to thank the Director the next time I see him, this suit is awesome!" 

Before Squirrel Girl had jumped onto the Ascend bandwagon, her costume had consisted of a pair of shorts, a cropped leather bomber jacket, and an orange crop top. It had worked surprisingly well, and she had been reluctant to give it up when the Director told her she needed a costume change, but now, trying it on for the first time, Squirrel Girl would never go back. 

Her costume was an expertly crafted set of heavy fur armor that looked like it had been ripped straight off of a Viking. Dark brown fur adorned the metal pauldrons across Squirrel Girl's shoulders and covered her vambraces, the color perfectly matching her auburn hair and the fur of her tail. Her leather chestplate was made in an intricately braided pattern with metal studs worked in throughout to reinforce the armor and pin down the impossibly soft fur lining inside. Though instead of extending down to cover her entire toroso, the chest piece stopped just above her belly button, leaving her midriff exposed. As for her legs, Squirrel Girl wore a long fur kilt ending just above her knees, padded with more leather and thick fur that was far more protective than one might assume. 

Needless to say, Squirrel Girl loved everything about her new aesthetic and the costume, "He even got my measurements down to a T, which is a bit disappointing. There goes my excuse to get him alone again with half my clothes off." 

Tippy Toe let out a soft growl of protest, sending a tremor through Squirrel Girl's body, making her laugh, "Hey, that tickles! But you're right, we have a job to do!" 

Unlatching herself from the saddle, Squirrel jumped to her feet before sliding down Tippy Toe's wing with a squeal of joy before she landed on the helicarrier deck. 

"Alright, circle around and see if you can spot any incoming hostiles. I'll signal you when we're ready to extract," Squirrel instructed her fury companion, who had gone through a far more drastic change than her. 

A month ago, Tippy Toe had been a regular, if slightly more intelligent, eastern grey squirrel, but after some experiments and sciencey magic, he had been transformed. Tippy Toe was now the size of a small bus, covered with dense, shaggy, grey fur, a long bushy tail that made up half of his body length, and a thick membrane of skin connecting his front and back legs. 

Squirrel Girl had worried that her companion would come to regret such a massive transformation, but it seemed as if he was happier than ever. 

With a twitch of his nose, Tippy Toe let out a soft chitter of agreement before he broke off into a run, building up momentum. Just as he reached the end of the helicarrier's runway, the mutant squirrel slapped the deck with his tail with enough force to launch his body into the sky. 

Several hidden sacs along his side inflated, increasing Tippy Toe's buoyancy as his fur flattened and he spread out his arms, turning his jump into a graceful glide as he climbed higher and higher into the air. 

Trusting her companion to take care of himself, Squirrel Girl turned, looking across the deck until she found a sloped entryway with a heavily armored door that hopefully led inside. 

Making her way over, Squirrel Girl tapped her chin as she looked from the door to the keypad next to it that was flashing red, "I guess stealth is out the window." 

Without wasting any time, Squirrel Girl cocked her fist back before throwing out a punch. Her bare fist slammed into the solid metal door with a loud bang, caving in the metal and sending the door flying off its hinges and crashing into the wall behind it. 

Peering down into the stairway, Squirrel Girl winces as a series of deafening alarms go off, but without pause, she makes her way inside the ship. 

Stepping foot into a hallway, Squirrel Girl's nose twitched as she picked up on several scents, but the most alarming was the acrid smell of gun powder and the clogging metallic tang of blood, "The General was right, someone is trying to take over." 

As Squirrel Girl tried to decide which direction she would take, the sound of thick boots hammering against the metal floor echoed down from her left, and she turned around just in time to watch four men in navy blue uniforms turn around the corner. On their shoulders, an insignia of an eagle with metal strips was proudly presented, and Squirrel Girl recognized it as the symbol of Shield, one of the many things she had been informed about during the mission debriefing. 

And while they were supposedly the good guys, the specks of blood decorating their uniforms and the smoking barrels of their guns did not fully convince Squirrel Girl, 'But there's only one way to be sure.' 

"Hey, are you guys good or bad?" Squirrel Girl asked, cupping her hands over her mouth as she shouted down at them. In response, the four agents raised their guns and pulled down on the triggers, flooding the hallway with the sound of gunfire. 

"Well, I guess that answers my question," Squirrel Girl muttered as she crouched down and moved her large, fluffy tail in front of her as the brown fur stood up on end, stiffening and gaining a spikey texture. 

With a muted ping, the bullets slammed into Squirrel Girl's tail but failed to penetrate her dense fur, instead getting caught. Trying to think of a solution, Squirrel Girl prepared herself for a charge when a door to her left suddenly opened, and without a second thought, she dove into the room. 

The moment Squirrel Girl was in the room, the door closed behind her, and a screen flashed to life, showing a grisly man with an eye patch over his left eye, "Who the hell are you and why are you on my ship?" 

Jumping to her feet, Squirrel Girl brushed the non-existent dirt off her armor and shook her tail, sending the bullets caught up in her fur falling to the ground. Facing the screen, Squirrel Girl smiled and struck a pose, "Agent Squirrel of Ascend Agencies, sent here on a rescue mission to assist the members of SHIELD and prevent a hostile takeover." 

A shadow passed over the man's face in response to Squirrel Girl's words, "Ascend Agencies...but how, your contract was still being negotiated?" 

Squirrel Girl grinned and rubbed the back of her head, "Yeah, we had to keep up that story so you wouldn't find out. But hey, thank god we did because otherwise I wouldn't be able to help you guys out...though it looks like I might be too late to begin with." 

The man paused before he ruefully shook his head, "So he knew all along, then didn't he? I must be getting too old for this shit." 

"Yeah, the Director is like really smart," Squirrel Girl nodded with a fond smile before she shook her head and focused, "But we're not your enemies, we have the same goal. To keep the world safe from all the super bad people and stuff like the people on your ship. Speaking of, just how many of them are there?" 

The man glanced at something out of view and frowned, "They've broken up into roughly ten groups and seem to be sweeping the ship for stragglers. I've managed to lock a few people in safe rooms, but you need to make your way to the bridge. I have control of the entire ship from here, and if they break in, we're all as good as dead."

Squirrel Girl frowned as a serious look settled across her face, "Alright, how do I get there?" 

"There should be a hidden air vent in the floor next to the door; it's reinforced, but that shouldn't pose a problem for you, judging by how you handled the door earlier. From there it's straight, then a left, two rights, and a final left." 

Squirrel Girl snapped a crisp salute, "Aye, Aye, I'm on my way." 

"Wait," The man called out once more as Squirrel moved to turn around, "If we survive this all, I am more than happy to offer you a place among SHIELD, Ms. Green." 

Squirrel Girl stared at the screen for a second before smirking, "Sorry, but I'm afraid I already got a pretty good deal going on, besides you're not nearly as hot as the Director, Mr. Fury." 

Without another word, Squirrel Girl turned around and quickly chewed through the vent cover, her tail swishing one last time before she vanished from view. 

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