"You're doing it wrong," says Joonghyuk, annoyed. "Look, your opponent's a Grass-type, so that means you—don't pick Psyduck, why the hell would you pick Psyduck? "
By now, Kim Dokja was familiar enough with him that he wasn't afraid of saying something wrong and accidentally making him mad anymore. "I like Psyduck the best," he replies mildly. "And you shouldn't swear."
Joonghyuk glares at him and crosses his arms over his chest. "Who cares, it—no, don't choose that move! It doesn't even do anything."
Kim Dokja doesn't know why Joonghyuk called him bossy when they first met, because Joonghyuk is clearly the bossiest out of the two of them.
"How are you supposed to win if you keep choosing the wrong type of Pokemon?" Joonghyuk continues, sounding frustrated. "It's all about the strategy—"
Onscreen, Kim Dokja's opponent trips over itself and empties the rest of its HP bar. It dissolves into a smattering of pixels and disappears.
"Ah. I won," he says wonderingly.
"But you didn't catch it."
"Don't nitpick." He passes the Game Boy back to Joonghyuk, who looks irritated that his advice was disregarded. "Here, it's your turn again. Show me how it's done then, Master."
"Fine." Joonghyuk is ridiculously easy to please for someone who looks so frowny all the time. "Watch closely. This enemy is a Fire-type, so you want to pick a Water-type Pokemon to counter it..."
He rests his chin in his hands and stares at Joonghyuk, who's explaining his strategy with a look of utmost concentration. Today is the fifth time they've met in the playground in the evening, and he's still a little amazed that it's actually happening. On the third day, they moved out from under the slide and onto a park bench where the lighting was better.
Kim Dokja is good at reading people; he can always tell the difference between Father's good days, bad days, and his really bad days. It's why he can tell Joonghyuk likes being praised. He might pretend he doesn't care, but he always smiles a little whenever Kim Dokja tells him he's really good at gaming. So he makes sure to praise Joonghyuk as much as he can so that he'll keep wanting to hang out with him.
"Are you even listening?"
He startles a little bit. "Of course! You were talking about how I shouldn't choose the same type of Pokemon as my opponent's."
Joonghyuk presses his lips together. "But you weren't watching me play."
"I was."
"No you weren't. You were staring at my face, not the screen."
Kim Dokja can feel his cheeks warm. "...You have a nice face."
Joonghyuk raises his eyebrows. "So?"
"So I like looking at it."
Joonghyuk looks like he isn't sure if he should feel flattered or offended, so instead, he just settles for looking constipated. "Whatever. Do you want to do the next gym battle?"
"Okay."
He loses the gym battle. Joonghyuk tells him he sucks, but he doesn't mind because everyone sucks at gaming compared to Joonghyuk. As he watches him play, he realizes that there's one very big problem: it's the weekend tomorrow.
Kim Dokja hates weekends. He doesn't have any friends to meet up with, and it's always awkward to walk through the park alone when everyone else is having fun in a group. Mother has work too, so it's not like he gets to spend that much more time with her. And as for Joonghyuk, he isn't sure if they're still going to meet up tomorrow. What if he has actual friends to play with on Saturdays? Or if he prefers to stay at home since there's no school? Does this mean that they're not going to see each other for two days? What if he forgets all about him by the time Monday comes?
Joonghyuk seems to notice that he's suddenly gone quiet, because he pauses the game and sets his console down. "What is it?"
"Nothing."
"You're really bad at lying," Joonghyuk says bluntly.
Kim Dokja picks at the edge of his shorts, where there's a tiny hole in the fabric that Mother didn't have time to patch up for him. He sticks his pinky through it. "Hey, Joonghyuk...are we friends?"
There's no response, and Kim Dokja hurriedly backtracks. "I mean, it's okay if you don't think we are or if you don't want to be. I'm just, um, asking."
"Are you an idiot?" demands Joonghyuk. His eyebrows are all scrunched together. "Of course we're friends. I don't hang out with people I can't stand."
Kim Dokja's chest fills with warmth, and he has to remind himself not to come off as too desperate, or else that'd be creepy. "Then can we meet tomorrow too?"
Joonghyuk gives him a weird look. "Sure. Let's not meet at the park though, there are too many people here on weekends."
"Yes! Okay."
"So where do you want to meet then?" Joonghyuk asks slowly, like he's trying not to scare him away.
No one but his mother ever cares about Kim Dokja's opinion, and he has a hard time coming up with what to say. He's never really explored the neighbourhood before. "Uh, we can go to the convenience store? If you want. They have popsicles. We don't have to if you don't want to."
"Sure. What game should I play tomorrow?"
Kim Dokja blinks in confusion. "I don't know? They're your games, you don't have to ask my opinion."
"I've beaten them all already so I don't care," Joonghyuk says arrogantly. "You can pick which one you want to play. Or maybe I'll bring them all."
"Then, I like the one today best," Kim Dokja replies, smiling so hard his face kind of hurts. "Have you caught all the Pokemon before?"
"I don't catch the ugly ones," says Joonghyuk.
The reply is so unexpected that Kim Dokja laughs; when he looks over at Joonghyuk, the boy is smiling too. It's a very nice smile.
"You're my first boy friend," he tells him.
Joonghyuk chokes on his own saliva and coughs. "What? "
Kim Dokja gives him a confused look, not sure why he's so surprised. Did he really look like someone with a lot of friends? "You're the first friend I've had who's a boy."
"Are you doing this on purpose?" Joonghyuk asks, after a long pause.
"Doing what on purpose?"
"Never mind." Joonghyuk sighs and looks up at the sky. "It's getting late. When are you heading back for dinner?"
Kim Dokja shifts uncomfortably on the bench. For the first time, his reluctance to head home isn't because of who's waiting there, but because he's having too much fun to leave. "If it's getting late, then why don't you go home?" he deflects.
"Because no one's there. Why don't you go home?
"Because. I don't want to."
"Then we'll stay here together."
Joonghyuk says it with an air of finality like he's deciding for the both of them. Kim Dokja lets him.
***
[Constellation Observatory]
Saturday morning dawned bright and clear in Seoul. White clouds floated lazily through the blue summer skies, while the green leaves of the trees rustled in the breeze.
[Uriel]: Ahh it's time! I can't wait to find out who's going on a date with whom!
[Bihyung]: Which dates did the girls pick again? Jang Hayoung picked the movie date, right?
[Sun Wukong]: Jung Heewon picked the mall date, Lee Seolhwa picked the escape room, and Yoo Sangah's going to the mural village.
Kim Namwoon woke up first at 7:00 am. He headed straight into the kitchen and removed a mysterious white plastic bag from the back of the fridge.
[Yi Sunshin]: I'm surprised Kim Namwoon was the first one to wake up, I thought he would have taken the opportunity to sleep in.
[Bihyung]: He does have morning classes, so I guess he's more used to waking up early than some of the others.
[Yi Sunshin]: You mean Jung Heewon, who works night shifts?
[Asmodeus]: Kim Dokja also wakes up late even though he doesn't go to work.
[Uriel]: It's not because he's lazy, it's because he's busy writing at night!
[Asmodeus]: I wasn't trying to imply anything. You're overreacting.
[Uriel]: You'd better not be.
[Sun Wukong]: Wait, what's he doing?
Making sure that no one (other than the cameraman) was watching him, he untied the bag and took out various small containers with the logo of a popular restaurant on them. He then opened the cabinet doors and took out two cute lavender plastic bento boxes, which he started to fill with the contents of the food containers.
[Uriel]: NO...don't tell me he's pretending he cooked lunch for his date?!
[Sun Wukong]: Hahahaha! No one but the crew and us will figure it out before it's too late. Poor girl.
[Yi Sunshin]: Maybe he's not trying to pass it off as his own, but just packing everything into a box that is easier to carry?
[Bihyung]: Somehow I doubt it.
[Yi Sunshin]: Hm. I can't agree with his dishonesty.
[Asmodeus]: Women do like men who know how to cook, and I suppose that's just his way of ensuring his victory over the others. Perfectly understandable.
After finishing this task, Kim Namwoon stuck both bento boxes in the microwave and set the timer to 3 minutes. He packed the now-empty food containers back into the plastic bag and threw it into the trash.
[Uriel]: Yikes!
[Sun Wukong]: Yeah, I wouldn't want to eat that. Won't it be all soggy by lunch time?
The scene cut to the girls' side, where 3 out of the 4 girls—Yoo Sangah, Jang Hayoung, and Lee Seolhwa—were already awake and milling about the common area. In the darkened bedroom, the back of Jung Heewon's head could be seen poking out from under her covers.
Lee Seolhwa was applying lipstick in the mirror, while Yoo Sangah was already fully dressed and checking through the items in her purse one last time.
"Have fun on your date," Lee Seolhwa told her with a smile.
"Thank you! You too, Seolhwa-ssi."
Jang Hayoung waved at her a little less enthusiastically than usual. "See you later, Sangah-ssi!"
"Bye!"
[Yi Sunshin]: I wonder who will be waiting for her at the mural village. Perhaps it's Kim Dokja?
The scene cut back to the guys. Lee Hyunsung was dressed in a navy button-down with his shirt-sleeves rolled up, showing off his impressive biceps. He discreetly wiped the sweat off his forehead as he waited on a bench in what looked like a small park.
[Sun Wukong]: Don't tell me he's the one meeting her?
[Bihyung]: No...I think it's just the director's way of building suspense by interspersing unrelated shots.
The scene cut to Jung Heewon. Despite having dark circles under her eyes from her night shift on Friday, there was a decided spring to her step as she walked along the sidewalk.
[Uriel]: Doesn't she look great? I'm so happy for her.
[Sun Wukong]: I thought Kim Dokja was your favourite?
[Uriel]: I can have multiple favourites!
The scene cut to Jang Hayoung, who was wearing a white dress that billowed around her legs. The corner of a pink envelope peeked out from her purse as she pushed open a set of glass doors.
The scene changed. Yoo Joonghyuk was wearing a black face mask as he leaned against the wall, scrolling through his phone with one hand. Suddenly, he looked up, like he saw someone in the distance.
[Asmodeus]: Are they going to meet?
The scene cut again. Lee Seolhwa strolled towards the camera, her hair tied up in a ponytail. She had opted for a more casual outfit today. As she drew nearer, her lips parted in astonishment.
[Yi Sunshin]: Is Yoo Joonghyuk the person she saw?
[Sun Wukong]: Wait, her shot was outdoors, but he was indoors...this doesn't bode well.
The scene cut to Kim Dokja. He was sitting at a table with a vague expression and two cups of coffee. He looked up at the sound of approaching footsteps.
[Uriel]: AaaAAAAaaaAAAAHH! Who is it going to be?
"Oh...hello," said Yoo Sangah, coming to a stop. Her expression was carefully neutral. "I'm sorry, did you wait long?"
[Bihyung]: Is the person she's meeting Kim Dokja?
[Yi Sunshin]: I guess Yoo Sangah did pick the right card after all. Congratulations to her.
[Sun Wukong]: Just a minute. If you look at the background of the shots, they're not exactly the same—
Kim Namwoon hopped off from the fence he was sitting on and almost dropped the stuff he was carrying when he looked up. Contrary to Yoo Sangah's polite smile, his face was frozen in an expression of shock. "Wait, it's you?! Shit, I mean...uh...you look nice today."
"Thank you," Yoo Sangah answered.
The two of them stood around awkwardly for a bit, both looking unsure of what to say.
[Sun Wukong]: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
[Uriel]: I feel kind of bad for her, even though I don't particularly support the ship.
[Bihyung]: He was clearly expecting Jang Hayoung to come. What a headache.
[Yi Sunshin]: This is karmic retribution for trying to pass off store-bought food as his own cooking, I see.
[Asmodeus]: Hmmmmm.
Kim Namwoon swallowed and scratched his neck. "So, uh, do you want to tour the mural village with me?" he offered, extending an arm towards her.
Yoo Sangah hesitated for a fraction of a second, then placed her hand on the crook of his elbow. "That sounds great, Namwoon-ssi," she said encouragingly. "Is there some kind of route we should follow?"
The tension dissipated from Kim Namwoon's shoulders, and his voice reverted back to its usual drawl. "Don't worry, noona, I've got this all planned out for us..."
[Sun Wukong]: She hesitated before taking his arm.
[Yi Sunshin]: I feel like she decided to take it in the end so he wouldn't feel dejected. He is the youngest out of all of them, and I feel like Yoo Sangah is trying her best not to hurt his feelings by looking too disappointed.
[Sun Wukong]: A perfect sister-brother relationship.
[Uriel]: Oooh, are we switching scenes already?
Yoo Joonghyuk's eyes narrowed. "It's you," he said in a low voice.
Jung Heewon's expression was equally sour. "I should be the one saying that." Sighing, she added, "Please tell me we're visiting the kimchi museum today. At least then this farce would be vaguely bearable."
[Sun Wukong]: Pfffft, what are these matches made in hell?
[Asmodeus]: That's...unexpected, to say the least.
[Yi Sunshin]: I did not anticipate that Yoo Joonghyuk would be the one to pick the mall for their date at all.
[Uriel]: Back when Jung Heewon was reading her card, the short sentence on it did feel like it was something Yoo Joonghyuk would say.
[Sun Wukong]: 'Meet you at Constellation Mall on Saturday'?
[Uriel]: Yes, that! It's hard to distinguish the tone of a written sentence, and I think Jung Heewon mistakenly thought the sentence was short because the writer was too shy to write more.
[Yi Sunshin]: And thus she guessed that it was Lee Hyunsung, who is the type to be embarrassed about romantic things. I see.
"Kimchi museum?" Yoo Joonghyuk repeated coldly. "We're going to the aquarium."
[Uriel]: I totally forgot there was an aquarium at that mall!
[Bihyung]: It all makes sense now. Lee Seolhwa likes animals and biology, and obviously Yoo Joonghyuk kept that in mind when planning the date.
[Asmodeus]: He should've written something more easily identifiable on the card.
"The what? Ugh, but that's so boring." Jung Heewon turned to the cameras with a scowl on her face. "Is it too late to swap dates with Seolhwa-ssi? Can I go somewhere else?"
Yoo Joonghyuk's eyes darkened in displeasure at her words. "You're going to the aquarium whether you like it or not."
"How about you go to the aquarium alone, and I'll go check out the kimchi museum?"
"No."
Jung Heewon took a deep breath in and exhaled. This shot of her face was from a different angle than the one previously, meaning some time had elapsed and she had possibly come to an agreement with the crew in the meantime. "Okay. Fine. I can appreciate fish. I love eating fish. Let's go."
She stormed towards the entrance of the aquarium while Yoo Joonghyuk trailed after her with a look of indifference.
[Sun Wukong]: Don't tell me the one on a date with Lee Seolhwa is...
"Good morning, Hyunsung-ssi."
Lee Hyunsung immediately jumped to his feet at the sight of her. "Seolhwa-ssi?" he gaped. "...Ah, good morning!"
"The weather's rather nice today, isn't it?" Lee Seolhwa asked with a small smile. "What kind of game are we playing today?"
Although they both weren't the other's first choice for a date, the atmosphere between them was still comfortable and friendly.
[Bihyung]: ALL the girls' guesses were wrong. Who would have thought?
[Yi Sunshin]: This is an interesting dynamic. Lee Hyunsung has been driving Lee Seolhwa to work all this week, and they've always gotten along well. I've always wanted to see them interact more outside of those trips.
[Sun Wukong]: There's actually potential here. It might actually do them good to spend time away from their 'default' partners and explore their options.
[Bihyung]: Lee Hyunsung is a completely different type of man from Yoo Joonghyuk. Yoo Joonghyuk brings out the calmer and more independent side of her personality since he gives her a lot of room to herself. They're polar opposites. But with Lee Hyunsung, the flow of the conversation is much more fast-paced and casual.
[Yi Sunshin]: If I were Lee Seolhwa, I would prefer spending time with someone more similar to me. Like Lee Hyunsung.
[Bihyung]: Indeed; Lee Seolhwa and Lee Hyunsung are pretty similar personality-wise.
[Asmodeus]: Hmmm. Opposites do attract, however.
[Uriel]: You're just salty your predictions were wrong.
[Sun Wukong]: I love watching the drama unfold. Can we get a bag of popcorn? Or sunflower seeds?
"It's a mystery-oriented escape room," Lee Hyunsung replied, looking sheepish. "Since I'm a policeman, I thought it might be interesting if we tried solving a murder case one. That is, if you don't mind?"
"Of course not," she assured him warmly. "I've always been interested in forensics, and I've dealt with my fair share of bloody situations during my ER rotation. Shall we go?"
Lee Hyunsung looked relieved, and the two of them headed down the street together.
[Uriel]: That was a solid choice for a date, actually! I 100% agree with the reasoning behind it. Too bad Jung Heewon isn't here.
[Sun Wukong]: Yeah, he really outdid himself. Good for him.
[Bihyung]: This means that the last couple is Kim Dokja and Jang Hayoung, right?
[Uriel]: Yes!
[Asmodeus]: The girl got her wish in the end.
[Yi Sunshin]: I wonder if Kim Dokja is the kind of person who would send a text to the girl he went on a date with out of politeness, or would he send it to Yoo Sangah tonight regardless?
[Bihyung]: I guess we'll find out soon.
***
"Dokja-ssi?"
Kim Dokja looked up at the sound of his name. Jang Hayoung was standing in front of him in a white dress, her cheeks flushed a delicate pink. Even though he knew his luck was terrible and he probably wouldn't be meeting with Yoo Sangah, he was still pretty surprised that the person who showed up was Jang Hayoung. But then again, he had received 2 texts the last time they sent them to each other so he probably should have expected this scenario.
"Hello," he said, standing up and greeting her. "Do you want some coffee? I wasn't sure what you usually get, so I just ordered a vanilla latte."
"Thanks! I love lattes." She glanced up at him through her lashes. "Dokja-ssi, which movie are we watching today?"
"Falling Blossoms in the Dark. It's a psychological horror movie."
Jang Hayoung choked on her latte, and Kim Dokja politely offered her a napkin to wipe her mouth with. "A, a horror movie?"
"Yes. It's based on a webnovel I've read before, so I thought it might be interested to see how the adaptation is." Noticing the growing look of alarm on Jang Hayoung's face, Kim Dokja hastily backtracked, "Of course, we don't have to see it if you don't want to. I'm sure there are plenty of other options."
"No, a horror movie is fine!" Jang Hayoung replied in a high voice. "Of course we can watch it. Um, so what's the movie about?"
They started heading towards the movie theatre as the one lonely cameraman assigned to them followed a few steps behind. He wasn't going to be watching the movie with them, apparently, even though Kim Dokja had offered to buy him a ticket out of politeness. Some of the passersby gave them weird looks, but everyone was so used to seeing filmings of reality TV shows by now that they soon lost interest.
"It's based on the tragic legend of the 'Women of the Caves'," Kim Dokja explained. "Young women who were betrothed to the Cave God their tribe worshipped were forced to fast for three days and three nights until their tears could make flowers fall from trees. After the marriage ritual, they were brought to the caves without any food or water. The women would spend the last years of their lives in solitude, living off well water, rodents, and insects—" Jang Hayoung's face seemed many shades paler than normal. Oh no. "—and that's basically what the movie is about."
There was an awkward pause.
"The movie's not actually that gruesome," he amended, trying to soften the blow. But the damage was already done. "Everything's highly metaphorical and fantastical because we're watching the delusions and flashbacks of the main character as she slowly goes insane in the darkness."
"That's," said Jang Hayoung, "interesting."
The cameraman gave him a discreet thumbs-down. Kim Dokja wondered if Yoo Sangah would have appreciated his movie choice, but probably not. In retrospect, the only other person amongst them who could stomach such a movie at 11:00 am on Saturday morning was Yoo Joonghyuk, who was an emotionless gaming robot. Even Lee Hyunsung probably would have been disturbed. Or worried that Kim Dokja was secretly a serial killer and arrested him on the spot.
Damn it, he really didn't think this through. He should have just planned a date at the aquarium or somewhere equally benign, even if he did want to watch the movie.
They arrived at the theatres in silence.
"I'll leave you guys here for now," the cameraman said, shutting off his equipment. "I'll be back when the movie ends, so don't go anywhere without me, okay?"
"Of course. Thank you for your hard work," Kim Dokja told him.
"Thank you. Take care," Jang Hayoung chimed in. She still sounded a little numb.
The cameraman shot Kim Dokja a disapproving look and left. The two of them handed the staff member their tickets and entered the movie theatres.
"We have fifteen minutes before the movie starts. I can go buy the popcorn for us," he offered. There was not much he could do to make up for his misstep, but at least he could make sure she didn't go hungry.
"It's all right, I can come with you."
They lined up together. "How has your week been, Dokja-ssi?" asked Jang Hayoung, with renewed vigour.
Kim Dokja was glad that she seemed to have recovered from the shock. "It's been good. I really enjoyed meeting everyone at the house. How was yours?"
"I ran into a few problems at work, but overall it's been great." Jang Hayoung bit her lip. "I know I'm not who you were expecting, but I really liked the card you made, Dokja-ssi."
He was surprised; he didn't really have much artistic talent, so he hadn't really decorated the card at all. "Thank you?"
"The gold embossing on the envelope was really nice," she continued. "I have a soft spot for pastel colours, so it really caught my eye."
"What envelope?"
Jang Hayoung frowned, peering up at him curiously. "I meant the pink envelope the card was in."
"I see." This was awkward. "I'm sorry, but we didn't actually choose the envelopes our cards were placed in; the director did. So the envelope colours were actually randomized."
Jang Hayoung's eyes widened in disbelief.
Kim Dokja couldn't bear to look at her. Thankfully it was their turn to order, so he could distract himself by talking to the cashier. "We'll get two bags of popcorn and two drinks, please. Hayoung-ssi, what kind of drink would you like?" He glanced over at Jang Hayoung, who looked even more disillusioned than before. He didn't even know it was possible to disappoint someone so many times in one day. It was a new low, even for him. "Hayoung-ssi?"
"I'll have iced tea," she said curtly.
After receiving their purchases, they made their way over to the nearly empty Theatre 4 and sat down in one of the back rows. There were not a lot of people who wanted to watch a horror movie this early in the morning, apparently.
Jang Hayoung shivered a little as she sat down, wrapping her arms around herself.
"Are you all right?" Kim Dokja asked her.
Jang Hayoung's eyes softened at his question. "I'm fine, it's just a bit cold in here."
"Yes, I suspect it's a side-effect of global warming," he replied. Global warming was a good topic for small talk.
"...We're indoors."
Oh. "Right."
The atmosphere surrounding them remained stone-cold throughout the whole movie. It was a pretty good movie overall, and just as metaphorical as he had predicted. Jang Hayoung didn't look particularly scared by the scenes, merely unsettled and kind of grossed out. Kim Dokja admired her ability to adapt to all scenarios.
Their cameraman reappeared at their side after they exited the theatre. There wasn't much for him to film; the aura of intense awkwardness between them was impermeable to all attempts at making conversation. After a while, the guy sighed and turned off his equipment again.
"You know," said the cameraman, "I think I'm just going to call it a day. I've got enough material for the episode."
"Goodbye," Kim Dokja and Jang Hayoung chorused.
The man sent Kim Dokja one more disapproving look before he left the mall, which he admittedly deserved.
"Is there anywhere you'd like to go?" Kim Dokja inquired, turning to his date. "Are you—"
"Hayoung-ah!" Jung Heewon materialized out of thin air and latched onto Jang Hayoung, wrapping her arm around her shoulders. "What a coincidence. I've missed you."
Three cameramen, Lee Jihye, and to Kim Dokja's surprise, Yoo Joonghyuk, trailed after her at a much slower pace.
"Heewon-unnie?" Jang Hayoung gasped. "Were you also on a date here?"
"Yeah, we went to the aquarium. It sucked," groaned Jung Heewon. "All the fish looked the same, and the squids were super ugly."
In hindsight, Kim Dokja was immensely relieved that he hadn't been on a date with Jung Heewon. He almost felt bad for Yoo Joonghyuk, who looked like his soul had already left his body.
"What were you guys up to?"
"We just finished watching a horror movie."
"Horror?" Jung Heewon asked incredulously. "Who in their right mind takes their date to see a horror movie on Saturday morning?"
Jang Hayoung smiled sheepishly at her. "It was a pretty good film though. There was a lot of artistic merit."
"You don't have to defend him," Jung Heewon told her. "Did you have lunch yet? No? Come on, Hayoung-ah, I'll treat you to lunch upstairs."
"Wait, Heewon-unnie, I—"
But Jung Heewon had already grabbed her by the arm and dragged her towards the elevators, taking half the cameramen with them. Before she left, she winked at Kim Dokja like she was doing him a favour. What kind of favour, he had no idea. Maybe she'd picked up on the fact that he wasn't interested in Jang Hayoung?
With the two women gone, all there were only four of them left.
"Hello," he said to Yoo Joonghyuk, smiling pleasantly. "How was your date?"
"None of your business," Yoo Joonghyuk shot back. There was no heat in his tone; he just sounded tired.
They now shared the bond of the Terrible Date. It was a very unique connection, one that transcended the bounds of personality differences and spiritual distance.
"The girls left so that means we're done here, right?" Yoo Joonghyuk's cameraman asked eagerly. "My girlfriend's waiting for me, can I go home?"
"I guess," Lee Jihye said cautiously. "I won't tell Sooyoung-unnie if you don't."
"Deal," the man replied, packing up his stuff and disappearing into the crowd at record speed.
Lee Jihye turned to Kim Dokja and Yoo Joonghyuk with a grin. Well, she was mostly staring at Yoo Joonghyuk. "So where are we headed to next?"
"Aren't you guys going to go home?" asked Kim Dokja. They were getting really curious looks from the passerby now, and it was only a matter of time before Yoo Joonghyuk got recognized.
Seemingly sensing the danger, Yoo Joonghyuk reached into his pocket and pulled out a black face mask, which he slipped on with expertise.
"It's barely 2 pm, are you really going to head back?" Lee Jihye demanded in an exasperated voice. "No one else is going to be home, you know. Why don't you live a little for once? You're too much of a shut-in."
Kim Dokja was astounded by her casual disrespect. When he was her age, he could barely look adults in the eye. "We don't even know each other."
Lee Jihye dismissed his complaint. "I've heard enough about you from Sooyoung-unnie that I know you by extension. But yeah, you can go home if you want. Oppa and I are going to stay a little longer."
Yoo Joonghyuk didn't immediately disagree with her, which was the most shocking thing that happened this whole day. Kim Dokja hadn't pegged him for the kind of person who'd give his fans the time of day, yet here he was, playing along with Lee Jihye's enthusiastic statements. Was he secretly weak to praise? But he hadn't been particularly receptive to Kim Namwoon...maybe he didn't like praise that was too flashy and insincere?
Seungah has a soft spot for children, he noted down.
This was an interesting development. "I guess I'll stick around so Yoo Joonghyuk doesn't get arrested for looking like your sugar daddy," said Kim Dokja.
Yoo Joonghyuk shot him a death glare, but it slid off Kim Dokja's thick skin like water and dealt zero damage to him. He could do anything for the sake of research.
Lee Jihye raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure you should be saying that in front of a high school student? What if you corrupt my delicate sensibilities?"
"You're Han Sooyoung's assistant. There's obviously nothing left to corrupt."
"Rude!" Lee Jihye sniffed. "Is that any way to speak to an innocent young woman like me? Now I get why you don't have a girlfriend, ahjussi."
Kim Dokja was a little wounded by the comment. "How come he gets to be oppa while I'm ahjussi? We're the same age."
"Because you give off ahjussi vibes," Lee Jihye replied with a toss of her head. Her searching gaze landed on a claw machine sitting in a secluded corner, and her eyes brightened. "Oppa, did I ever tell you I'm super good at claw machines? My friend Bori calls me the War God because I never lose a battle against them."
"No."
"Aren't all claw machines rigged?" asked Kim Dokja. "That means there's a luck component to winning then, right?"
Lee Jihye glared at him. It was oddly reminiscent of Yoo Joonghyuk's glare, and Kim Dokja marvelled at how easily the man seemed to influence the people around him. "It's an art form, not luck. Someone like you wouldn't get it."
The three of them gathered around the claw machine. Frankly, they looked kind of ridiculous, hovering over a teenage girl who was digging coins out of her wallet. Kim Dokja hoped no one would call mall security on them.
The claw machine was filled up with a multicolour selection of Pokemon plushies, and Lee Jihye locked eyes with a cute blue one with a fishtail. "I'm going to get that blue one there," she announced, jabbing a finger at the glass. She fed her coins into the slot, and got to work moving the metal claw carefully towards it. When she finally manoeuvred it into place, she lowered the claw slowly—and it closed around empty air. She cursed.
"It's not your fault these things are rigged," said Kim Dokja, trying to cheer her up.
Lee Jihye slammed her fist down on the control panel. "Damn it! Again." She fed another bill into the machine and started moving the claw again. She was even more off the mark this time. The third time didn't work either. Nor the fourth time.
"I swear I'm actually good at this," she said, turning to Yoo Joonghyuk with a pout. "All the girls in my class always depend on me to win them plushies; my usual success rate is 95%, I swear."
"I'll get it for you," Yoo Joonghyuk said. He voice sounded carefully indifferent, if little muffled behind his face mask. "You want the Vaporeon?"
Lee Jihye beamed at him. "Yeah! Thank you so much!"
Yoo Joonghyuk stepped in front of the claw machine and took over the controls from her. He even took off his face mask; for what purpose, Kim Dokja wasn't sure. Maybe it was easier to concentrate this way? He aimed the claw at the blue Pokemon with a supernatural precision and lowered it...onto the doll beside Vaporeon. The machine chimed and its lights flashed happily as it deposited an ugly orange fish into the slot.
Lee Jihye bent down and picked it up. "It's Magikarp. Huh." It was obvious that she thought it was ugly, but she didn't want to be rude. "Thanks, oppa! This one's okay too, I guess."
Yoo Joonghyuk's lips thinned. "I'll get it on the next try," he said in a low voice, ignoring Lee Jihye's protests that she didn't mind the plushie.
After another series of complicated movements, the lights flashed again and the machine happily spat out another Magikarp.
Lee Jihye's eye twitched. "It's fine, I wasn't a huge fan of Vaporeon anyway. I don't even play Pokemon Go anymore—"
But Yoo Joonghyuk had already barreled ahead and restarted the game. The machine spat out a Pikachu, then a bird thing, then a pink round Pokemon that Kim Dokja vaguely remembered as Jigglypuff, then a blue tortoise and an orange dragon... Yet Lee Jihye's blue Vaporeon continued to evade his attempts to catch it. Kim Dokja stifled a laugh at the dark look on Yoo Joonghyuk's face and earned a dark glare for his trouble.
"I'm trying again," declared Yoo Joonghyuk, feeding another bill into the machine.
"But you've already spent 10,000 won," Lee Jihye said worriedly. "It's okay, really. I can always come back another time. And I've already got all these other plushies, I like Pikachu a lot too."
"Don't worry about him, he's rich enough that his wallet can take it," Kim Dokja told her. "You would have to do a lot more to bankrupt him."
"Shut up," said Yoo Joonghyuk, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration as he moved the joystick.
"I was trying to be reassuring."
There was something different about this time. As Kim Dokja and Lee Jihye watched with bated breath, the silver claw closed around the tail of the blue plushie, and slowly started lifting it out of the air and towards the exit. When Yoo Joonghyuk finally let go, it fell head-first into the slot, and the machine burst into song once more. Lee Jihye let out a loud cheer. Kim Dokja started clapping, and it was only half-sarcastic this time.
"You're the best, oppa!" Lee Jihye yelled, grabbing the plushie and depositing it on top of the pile of its brethren in her arms. There were stars in her eyes. "You're the true master of the claw machine—can I call you Master? Can you teach me how you do it?"
"Maybe next time." There was no denying that Yoo Joonghyuk looked a little pleased.
"Congratulations," said Kim Dokja. He actually meant it too this time, "you're officially her hero. And you've earned it."
Yoo Joonghyuk gave him an indecipherable look.
As they waited for Lee Jihye to finish taking a selfie with her newly acquired plushies, Kim Dokja took out his phone from his pocket and unlocked it. He had five unread messages from Han Sooyoung (probably to chastise him about his date), and a passive-aggressive email from his editor about the upcoming posting date of his new novel.
Suddenly, an orange weight landed in his arms and almost jostled his phone out of his hand. "What the—" Magikarp stared up at him with soulful black eyes. It really was undeniably ugly.
"For you," said Yoo Joonghyuk, having just thrown the plushie at him. "There was no squid."
What was that supposed to mean? Kim Dokja squished the fish's face between his fingers, watching as its eyes bulged from the pressure. Either way, he wasn't going to turn down a free gift. He wasn't that ungrateful. "Thank you," he said, smiling.
Yoo Joonghyuk looked away.
As they drove back to the mansion in Yoo Joonghyuk's car, Kim Dokja noticed that the man kept glancing at him whenever he thought he wasn't paying attention. The attention was unexpected, but not uncomfortable.
Constellation Observatory]
[Uriel]: The movie they watched is only rated 2.1/5 stars online.
[Sun Wukong]: So it wasn't a good movie after all.
[Uriel]: No...
[Sun Wukong]: That must have sucked. I feel even worse for Jang Hayoung now.
[Bihyung]: Anyway, back to what our incarnations are up to in the Heart Signal House! Now that all of us have made our predictions, it's time to unveil the results of tonight's texts! Will the dates today have changed the relationships between them?
The four men were sitting around in a semi-circle in the living room downstairs. Yoo Joonghyuk and Kim Dokja were perched on two different couches as far away from each other as possible, while Lee Hyunsung sat in-between them. Kim Namwoon was lounging on the carpeted floor, his feet propped up on the coffee table. It was a physically challenging not to mention extremely chuuni position to sit in, but he managed to pull it off semi-effortlessly.
The camera zoomed in on Lee Hyunsung's face as his phone buzzed. He looked happy and a little fond as he finished reading the text.
[ The weather was beautiful today. [Picture of a blue sky] ]
[Uriel]: Lee Seolhwa texted him?!
[Yi Sunsin]: What a surprising development. I thought for sure that Lee Seolhwa would text Yoo Joonghyuk tonight regardless of how her date went.
[Bihyung]: There's no harm in exploring her options, especially when they did get along so well. I wonder if this means Lee Hyunsung sent a text to Lee Seolhwa as well.
[Uriel]: So Yoo Joonghyuk isn't going to get a text today then?
[Sun Wukong]: Can you pass the popcorn? Thanks.
The camera cut to Kim Dokja, whose phone was the second to buzz with an incoming text. He looked slightly relieved as he read it.
[ "I wonder what ants do on rainy days?" [Picture of sunlight streaming through the leaves] ]
[Uriel]: That's a quote from Murakami Haruki's work, right?
[Bihyung]: You're absolutely correct. Both Yoo Sangah and Kim Dokja are quite literary, aren't they?
[Asmodeus]: My prediction was correct. Yoo Sangah texted Kim Dokja.
[Sun Wukong]: Yeah, her date with Kim Namwoon wasn't really anything to write home about, at least on her end.
[Uriel]: Is Jang Hayoung going to text him too?
[Bihyung]: If I were her, I wouldn't. It was a pretty disastrous date and I think it proves that they're not compatible.
[Asmodeus]: An interesting dilemma.
The camera panned across the faces of everyone in the room. Yoo Joonghyuk had already put his phone away in his pocket and was sitting there with his eyes closed, meditating.
A sound of another buzz broke the silence. Lee Hyunsung fumbled with his phone as he navigated to his messaging app, clearly surprised to have gotten a second text.
[ I hate fish. [Picture of sushi] ]
Lee Hyunsung scratched his head with a puzzled smile.
[Bihyung]: I think he thought the previous text was from Jung Heewon, but actually this one is from her.
[Sun Wukong]: Lee Hyunsung sure is popular today. How the turntables have—
[Yi Sunsin]: It's curious how Yoo Joonghyuk received the most texts on the first day, but he hasn't even gotten a single one thus far today.
[Asmodeus]: There's still Jang Hayoung.
The camera lingered lovingly on Yoo Joonghyuk's closed eyes for a moment before sliding over to Kim Namwoon, who looked bored and a little frustrated. The camera panned out once more to take in the four of them in an ensemble shot. A pink text blurb appeared on the screen explaining that Jang Hayoung didn't text anyone tonight, hence why there were only 3 received texts.
[Yi Sunsin]: So she didn't end up choosing anyone in the end. I suppose Kim Dokja really disappointed her today.
[Sun Wukong]: I can respect that. That's not against the rules, is it?
[Bihyung]: No, I don't think so. The incarnations are allowed to pass on their chance to text anyone if they want to.
[Uriel]: So both Yoo Joonghyuk and Kim Namwoon didn't receive any texts today! Oh no.
[Sun Wukong]: To be fair, Yoo Joonghyuk did publicly burn his bridges with Jung Heewon with his antisocial behaviour the other night. I wouldn't text him either if I were Jang Hayoung.
[Uriel]: True!
[Bihyung]: I wonder how the girls are faring tonight. Shall we take a look?
The scene cut to the girls' common room, where Lee Seolhwa, Yoo Sangah, Jang Hayoung, and Jung Heewon were also waiting to receive their texts for the night. Yoo Sangah glanced down at her phone when it buzzed in her hand and unlocked the screen with a swipe of her thumb. She smiled a little sadly at whatever she saw onscreen.
[ "If you remember me, then I don't care if everyone else forgets." [Picture of a painted koi fish on a staircase] ]
[Bihyung]: Kim Namwoon is really being forward today. I thought he was going to text Jang Hayoung for sure, but it looks like he's switched targets.
[Uriel]: Is that quote from Kafka on the Shore? He really did his research, didn't he?
[Yi Sunsin]: I almost can't bear to watch this.
[Asmodeus]: Why? I find it rather amusing, actually.
[Uriel]: Because you're a sadist.
Lee Seolhwa's phone buzzed twice in a row. Similar to Lee Hyunsung, she also seemed surprised by her popularity tonight.
[ [Picture of a ladybug with 7 black spots] ]
[ Thank you, you're a good person. [Picture of the sunset] ]
[Bihyung]: As usual, Yoo Joonghyuk isn't writing anything to go with his texts. It does make them easier to identify though.
[Sun Wukong]: He'll have to try harder next time now that Lee Hyunsung is posing some serious competition to him. Can you pass me the bag of sunflower seeds?
[Yi Sunsin]: I wonder why she chose not to text Yoo Joonghyuk tonight.
[Uriel]: It's not like she has an obligation to him. Lee Hyunsung and her had a lot of fun on their date today, and it's natural that she might consider extending an olive branch to him. He's a perfectly feasible match for her as well.
[Sun Wukong]: Mmmmphrf yeah.
[Asmodeus]: If Lee Hyunsung and Lee Seolhwa get together, where would that leave your other favourite, Jung Heewon? She'd be alone then, wouldn't she?
[Uriel]: ...
[Sun Wukong]: Are your ships sinking?
[Uriel]: No!
Jang Hayoung was sitting by herself in a beanbag chair, and she looked resigned with her fate, having not even bothered to take out her phone. On the contrary, Jung Heewon seemed kind of annoyed. She kept tapping her foot against the carpet.
Just then, Yoo Sangah's phone buzzed again, signalling the end of the round of texts.
[ I'm glad it's the weekend. [Picture of a shelf of books] ]
[Sun Wukong]: Is Kim Dokja trying to imply that he's glad he can spend more time with her since she doesn't have work? Damn, he's smooth.
[Uriel]: I think he's just genuinely happy it's the weekend.
[Asmodeus]: He's home all the time anyway. What's the difference?
[Uriel]: Weekends are special even if you work from home!
[Bihyung]: Wow, some of the choices tonight were really surprising! There were also a lot more people who received zero texts: Yoo Joonghyuk, Kim Namwoon, Jung Heewon, and Jang Hayoung were all left hanging. In a shocking turn of events, Jang Hayoung chose not to send a text at all—is she giving up on her chance to find love already? Stay tuned for the next episode to find out more!
***
[ "Hyung," said Seungah. "Why ]
He stared at the sentence. Then deleted it.
[ "Gyubin-hyung," said Seungah. "Why are you ]
He pressed backspace repeatedly until the sentence disappeared from his screen.
[ "Lee Gyubin," said Seungah. "Why are you mad? What were you expecting to happen? You naive little shit ]
"Why isn't this working," he said out loud to his computer screen. "Just call him hyung already. You know you want to."
But Seungah, or rather his mental image of Seungah, refused to obey. He could almost picture her glaring at him with Yoo Joonghyuk's signature frown on her face.
He was the author, damn it. He would make her call him hyung even if it was out of character, that's what the term authorial privilege was meant for.
[ "Hyung," Seungah sobbed. "What have you done?" ]
Having procrastinated too much yesterday, Kim Dokja was now behind in his writing schedule and had a lot of catching up to do. However, his chapters just weren't turning out like he wanted them to. It was like he was playing whack-a-mole with his characters, trying to force them into molds they didn't fit in.
Since his go-to beta reader Han Sooyoung was too busy with her show right now, he decided to enlist the help of an internet friend instead. He pulled up a chat window and sent her a private message.
[Salvation]: Good evening.
[Salvation]: chapter.docx
[Salvation]: If you're not busy, would you mind telling me what you think of this chapter? I was just wondering if the characterization felt off or not.
[Judge of Fire]: !!!!!!
[Judge of Fire]: is this a sneak peek of the new book?
[Salvation]: Yes.
[Judge of Fire]: of course I can!
[Salvation]: Thank you. ^^
Uriel was one of his most loyal readers, and they'd become casual friends over the past few years. She was a screenwriter of some sort but only part-time, since her family was rich enough that she could spend the other part of her time doing...other things. (She was also the reason he kept coming across Yoo Joonghyuk fanfiction on Twitter. He didn't know just how many fandoms she was in, and he didn't want to know either. There were some pieces of knowledge that changed you irrevocably as a person.)
[Judge of Fire]: so I'm reading it right now and I just have a quick question
[Judge of Fire]: why is she calling him hyung?
[Judge of Fire]: shouldn't it be oppa? because she's female?
[Judge of Fire]: *confused baby angel sticker*
[Salvation]: Ah.
[Salvation]: Sorry.
[Salvation]: That's a typo. I'll correct it immediately.
[Salvation]: chapter_version2.docx
[Judge of Fire]: *sparkly thumbs up*
[Salvation]: *less sparkly thumbs up*
Unfortunately, the Freudian slips didn't end there.
[Judge of Fire]: third page, first paragraph, second line
[Judge of Fire]: shouldn't it be "she", not "he"?
[Salvation]: Thanks for catching the typo.
[Judge of Fire]: no worries~
[Judge of Fire]: was she originally supposed to be a guy or something O.O
[Salvation]: ...
[Judge of Fire]: I see
Uriel was too perceptive sometimes. It was one of the reasons why he consulted her about the chapter in the first place, but it was also kind of awkward on a personal level.
[Judge of Fire]: why is she crying in the last scene?
[Salvation]: She's upset that he got injured.
[Judge of Fire]: that's kind of out of character for her, isn't it?
[Judge of Fire]: shouldn't her reaction be along the lines of "you're an idiot for getting into this situation in the first place"?
[Salvation]: Ah. You're right.
[Judge of Fire]: I know I don't have much context to go off but I don't think she would cry, even if she's worried
[Salvation]: Okay, I'll change that part later.
[Judge of Fire]: *dancing baby angel sticker*
[Judge of Fire]: can I ask what's the point of making seungah a girl? is it just so the romance would be heterosexual?
[Salvation]: What do you mean?
[Judge of Fire]: she doesn't have a female narrative voice so it's pretty jarring to see her act and think in a way most women wouldn't
[Judge of Fire]: not that there should be a standard that women have to adhere to, but just in terms of characterization I'm not really sold on her as a female lead
[Judge of Fire]: she's basically a badly genderswapped version of your usual second male lead
[Judge of Fire]: I don't even think you removed all the male pronouns properly
[Judge of Fire]: I can feel that you're trying to foreshadow the romantic development, but weirdly enough they have even less chemistry than your past main characters do with their male best friends
[Judge of Fire]: and I'm only a little biased when saying this~
[Judge of Fire]: so was she originally a male character and you just changed their pronouns because your editor asked you to change their gender from male to female?
[Salvation]: Not exactly. I'm just trying out something new.
[Judge of Fire]: it would be better to change her back to a guy then, right?
[Salvation]: Right…?
[Judge of Fire]: write what you want, salvation-nim! don't let your editor oppress you!
[Judge of Fire]: I'm really looking forward to the first chapter's posting!
[Judge of Fire]: (also I would be really happy if there's a BL side pairing this time ><)
[Salvation]: As always, thank you for your help, I'll try reworking the chapter with your suggestions.
[Salvation]: And I'll think about it.
[Judge of Fire]: !!!!! really???!!!
[Salvation]: Yes. I'll talk to you later?
[Judge of Fire]: *baby angel waving sticker*
Kim Dokja closed the chat window and opened up his empty document again. The blank page stared back at him mockingly; he had never felt so uninspired in his whole life. He could hear the sounds of yelling and laughter downstairs mixed in with the rasp of the ventilation. The others were having some sort of TV show marathon today as a bonding event, which he'd declined to participate in because he needed to focus on his writing. Yet he hadn't even managed to write much in the end.
Deciding to take a break, he shut off his laptop and headed down the stairs to where the sounds were coming from. As he approached the living room, he was able to make out what exactly the others were talking about.
"—get married after the main character dies?!" yelled Lee Jihye. "I thought Schweichen liked the main character! I can't support this ship!"
"The webnovel's original ending was the same, and I remember a lot of people were mad about it back then," said Jang Hayoung. "I think the author published an alternate ending afterwards where it's more ambiguous."
"They should have used the alternate ending for the adaptation then!"
"I agree, the shot of them having a baby five years later and naming it after the main character doesn't fit the tone of the show at all," said Yoo Sangah.
"Like, I get if the main character ended up with Yuri even if I don't support it, but what is this shitty development?!"
"Yeah. Why does everyone always have to get married in the end?" Jung Heewon asked. "What's wrong with staying single?"
"Aren't we on a dating show right now? What kind of question is that?"
"Shut up, Kim Namwoon. No one asked your opinion."
"You shut up, Lee Jihye."
"From what I recall, the author has a hangup about marriage and starting a family," Jang Hayoung explained. "Most of his characters get married in the end."
"That's a dumb reason. They don't need to get married to be happy!"
Having both heard the complaints and seen them in angry bold text before, Kim Dokja had a pretty good idea of what they were talking about. His fears were confirmed when the TV screen came into view: they were watching Unbreakable Faith. Shit.
He hadn't thought much of pairing the deuteragonist with the female lead after the main character's death when he initially wrote the book, and the backlash from his fans completely caught him off guard. As damage control, he even posted an official statement explaining that the main character liked both of his friends platonically (and vice versa) and the ending had been planned from the first chapter. He eventually caved to peer pressure and changed the ending for print publication, but to this day Unbreakable Faith still regularly made it onto Top 10 charts for the worst webnovel ending ever. After that awful experience, he made sure to always pair the main character with the female lead; at least then he would only be angering the BL shippers and not all of them.
Uriel had stuck with him throughout the drama despite her ship sinking, and as a show of gratitude, he'd started leaving side characters' relationship statuses unknown for her creative use. The ambiguous relationships, combined with the strong friendship bonds between the main characters that he liked to depict in his stories, earned him a certain reputation amongst female fans. Abyssal Black Flame Dragon (who only ever wrote generic male chunni power fantasies) mocked him endlessly for his disproportionally large ratio of female readers, but he suspected he was secretly jealous.
"It's your time to shine, Kim Dokja," a voice said from behind him.
Han Sooyoung was holding a multi-layered cocktail in one hand and was sipping from it with a heart-shaped straw as she leaned against the wall.
"Did you suggest the show to them?" asked Kim Dokja, frowning at her. With how much she constantly complained about the amount of work she had to do, he thought she'd be at home catching up on sleep today.
Han Sooyoung widened her eyes in the very picture of innocence. "Do I look like someone who would do that?"
"Of course you—why are you using that straw? Isn't it for couples? Why are you drinking out of both ends at the same time?"
"I have a lot of self-love."
Kim Dokja glanced discreetly into the living room, but the two cameramen were nowhere in sight. Someone had even thrown a towel over the camera on the wall to hide the lens from view.
"What are you and Lee Jihye even doing here?" he continued. "I thought we weren't filming a special segment this evening."
Han Sooyoung shrugged. "Are we not allowed to join in on the bonding event? Hey, everyone!" she called out as she walked into the living room. "Look who came back from the dead!"
"Han Sooyoung," he warned.
Everyone looked up at the noise. Jung Heewon, Yoo Sangah, and Jang Hayoung were sitting on one couch, while Yoo Joonghyuk, Lee Seolhwa, and Lee Hyunsung were on the other. Lee Jihye and Kim Namwoon were sitting on the loveseat together and bickering angrily about something. Did they even know each other?
"Dokja-ssi," greeted Yoo Sangah.
"Sangah-ssi."
On the TV screen, the credits of Unbreakable Faith were rolling as the bittersweet ending theme played in the background.
"Hey," said Jung Heewon, raising her hand in a wave. "You're too late, we just finished the show."
Yoo Joonghyuk looked up from his phone, saw that it was him, and looked back down again.
"He should be glad he didn't see it," said Lee Jihye, squeezing the TV remote in her hand so hard the plastic creaked. Her face was dark with fury. "What a waste of 12 hours of my life."
Han Sooyoung's smirk widened. Kim Dokja had an ominous feeling about what was going to come out of her mouth. "Did you also hate the ending, Jihye?"
"It wasn't that bad," Lee Hyunsung tried. "I thought it was nice that the two of them found love in the end, after everything they've been through."
Lee Jihye threw her hands in the air in exasperation. "But they found love with the WRONG person!"
"Exactly." Jang Hayoung nodded. "Yuri should have ended up with the main character."
Lee Jihye winced at the statement. "Well, not that either, but that's not the point! The point is, this pairing makes no sense!"
"Don't you hate how the author forcibly paired them together?" Han Sooyoung asked gleefully.
"Sooyoung-ah."
"Yes!"
"Luckily for you, Jihye, you get to air your grievances with the author directly. Not a lot of fans can say the same." Han Sooyoung patted Kim Dokja on the shoulders with a pitying look. "Isn't that right, Dokja-ssi? Or should I call you Salvation-nim?"
Kim Dokja covered his face with his hands.
"..." Lee Jihye's eyes brightened as realization dawned upon her. "Are you saying that he's the author of the book the show is based on?" she gaped.
"What?!" Kim Namwoon leapt to his feet beside her and pointed an accusing finger at him. "Hey, you said you weren't Salvation when we revealed our careers last time!"
"Kim Dokja was just too embarrassed to tell you guys back then," said Han Sooyoung, waving his concerns away. "He's pretty secretive about his identity, so don't go around telling people, okay?"
Lee Hyunsung nodded in agreement, looking impressed. Yoo Sangah was watching the two of them with a particular look on her face.
Jang Hayoung looked vaguely star-struck. "You're Salvation? Really? I, uh, I really liked Lamarck's Kirin!"
"Thank you," said Kim Dokja. There was no point in denying it now, no one would believe him. "I'm honoured you enjoyed it."
"How much did you sell the rights to Unbreakable Faith—"
Lee Jihye pushed Kim Namwoon out of the way before he could ask more pointless questions. "So, author-nim, why'd you make the two of them get married in the end?"
He was getting flashbacks of 2014 and the fanwank about the original ending all over again. "I was trying to give the two of them a happy ending," he tried to explain.
But it was futile.
"They weren't even interested in each other!" Lee Jihye argued. "I would've been okay with it if she married the main character or something, but why Schweichen? They don't love each other!"
Kim Namwoon shrugged one shoulder. "I dunno, I thought the romance was okay."
"You're unqualified to comment on romance," snapped Lee Jihye.
"Hey!"
"I just thought they would make good parents," Kim Dokja said weakly.
Lee Jihye turned to Han Sooyoung with a look of determination. "Unnie, you said you were university friends with him, right? Were you there when he wrote the book? Why didn't you stop him?"
"Hey, I didn't want my Yuri to get paired up with his in-universe man crush either," Han Sooyoung protested. "But this guy never listens to me when it matters. Honestly, the producers should've chosen a better book to adapt. It was the first book he ever wrote, and it was honestly kind of trash."
Kim Dokja sighed. "Do you have to call him that?"
"You spent 3 paragraphs describing how fit he was. Seriously."
"What are you talking about? I describe all my characters in detail."
"Wait, don't tell me the female lead was based on Han Sooyoung?" Jung Heewon asked, looking like her worldview was shattering before her eyes. She had clearly picked up on the implication in Han Sooyoung's words. "What, is she your ex-girlfriend or something?"
"We're not—"
"Hell no. He just sucks at coming up with characters so he always bases them off the people around him," Han Sooyoung said. "I think half our graduating class was featured in Unbreakable Faith at one point. He killed off almost all of them too, the savage."
It was incredibly embarrassing to have his writing habits announced to the whole world.
"That's an interesting way to write characters," Lee Seolhwa said kindly. "I wonder if we'll feature in Dokja-ssi's books in the future?"
Kim Dokja couldn't help but glance at Yoo Joonghyuk. Thankfully, he was staring at his phone screen with a look of concentration and didn't seem to be paying attention. "Ah, who knows?"
"For your next book, can you base a character off of me?" Lee Jihye asked eagerly. "Make her someone cool too, not a one-shot villain!"
"I'll think about it."
"So do you prefer women like Han Sooyoung or not?" Jung Heewon raised her eyebrows at him. "Tell us the truth. There's no accounting for taste, I won't judge you."
Han Sooyoung rolled her eyes and muttered something insulting under her breath.
"Can we not do this?" Kim Dokja asked the ceiling.
"We're on a dating show. Obviously we're going to be curious what your type is, even if it does turn out to be that woman."
"Oh, he wishes he could date me," Han Sooyoung snorted, examining her cuticles with a bored expression. "Sadly for him, I'm way out of his league."
"You still owe me 40,000 won from the last time we went drinking and you passed out before you could pay your bill," he reminded her before her ego could get too inflated.
"I already said I'll treat you next time!"
Yoo Sangah's smile looked a bit strained from where she sitting quietly on the couch, watching the back and forth exchange take place in front of her. Jang Hayoung patted her on the knee sympathetically.
"Dokja-ssi, do you know Judge of Fire in real life?" asked Jang Hayoung. "Is it true that she's your sister? She can't be your wife if you're on this show, right?"
Kim Dokja was confused; what sort of rumours were they even spreading about him online? "No. We've never met in real life, and we're just friends."
Jung Heewon smirked. "Like how you and Han Sooyoung are just friends?"
"What?"
"That's it, Jung Heewon." Han Sooyoung rolled up her sleeves and started advancing towards her ominously. "One of us is going to bite the dust today, and it won't be me."
"Bring out all your power. I'll cut you down."
Lee Hyunsung quickly got up from his seat and stood in front of Jung Heewon, blocking her from view. "Let's not fight, you two."
Lee Jihye was torn between helping out Jung Heewon and helping out Han Sooyoung. "I don't know which unnie to cheer for..."
"Have you turned to the dark side, Jihye?"
"Who are you calling the dark side? Jihye, I'll give you 500 won if you steal her sword from her bedroom."
"Don't you dare listen to her, Jihye."
"500 won? I can't even buy a can of soda with 500 won, Sooyoung-unnie."
"Hah?! You little traitor—"
While everyone was distracted by the impending bloodbath, Kim Dokja snuck out of the room and headed back upstairs before they remembered he was there.
***
Lee Hyunsung was a wonderful roommate. He was unobtrusive, and he went to bed at 11 pm sharp and slept like the dead. Kim Dokja had never had a roommate before (apart from the few times Han Sooyoung crashed at his place), and he was going to miss him when the thirty days were up. It was nice not being alone for once.
He finished brushing his teeth and dried his hands on his towel that was still wet from his shower earlier. Unlocking the door, he stepped out of the bathroom and called out, "Hyunsung-ssi, it's your turn—" His words died in his throat as his gaze landed on the intruder.
Yoo Joonghyuk was sitting on Lee Hyunsung's bed with his back against the wall. There was a black suitcase lying open on the floor next to his feet. He was typing something on his laptop, and he looked up at the sound of Kim Dokja's voice.
"Where's Lee Hyunsung? Are we having a sleepover?" asked Kim Dokja, looking around the room for Lee Hyunsung. "Do I need to start braiding your hair?"
"I switched rooms with Lee Hyunsung," said Yoo Joonghyuk. He didn't seem impressed by the attempt at humour.
"Huh. How did you manage it?"
"I asked him directly."
"I meant, how did you manage to convince Kim Namwoon to let you go?" Kim Dokja asked curiously.
Yoo Joonghyuk frowned. "I don't need his permission to switch rooms."
"You're breaking his young heart, acting like this." Kim Dokja shook his head in mock dismay. "What if he thinks he drove you away?"
"I told him I had private matters to discuss with you," Yoo Joonghyuk said grumpily. "And Kim Namwoon doesn't care."
"That's because he's putting up a brave front for you. Besides, do I not get a say in who my roommate is? How come no one asked my permission?"
"You never asked my opinion when you assigned the rooms for everyone."
"Fair enough." It was karmic retribution.
In retrospect, it was weird how Yoo Joonghyuk hadn't switched rooms with Lee Hyunsung earlier, but Kim Dokja just thought it was because the man had evaluated his options and realized that rooming with Kim Namwoon was marginally better than rooming with him. Besides, what was the point of switching now and when he had already survived a week there? Unless he was too smart to fall for the sunk cost fallacy.
They stared at each other in silence for a few moments. It was weird seeing Yoo Joonghyuk in his pyjamas, even if they were just as black and grim as he expected. His dedication to his emo aesthetic clearly ran deeper than anyone predicted.
Kim Dokja was the first one to break the silence between them. "Are you not going to give me the talk?"
"What talk."
"The 'don't touch my stuff or I'll kill you, don't drip water all over the carpet or I'll stab you in your sleep, don't use my soap or I'll carve out your intestines and strangle you with them' kind of talk. The standard roommate discussion."
"I think you know what not to do already."
"But if you don't specifically state your boundaries, how would I know which mine zones to avoid?" Kim Dokja asked nonchalantly.
"Then don't snore," Yoo Joonghyuk added, almost like an afterthought.
"I can't control something like that, you're asking the impossible."
Yoo Joonghyuk took a deep breath in and exhaled. He was clearly trying to suppress any homicidal tendencies; the camera on the ceiling was still recording.
Kim Dokja climbed onto his bed and picked up his phone from the bedside table where the Magikarp was perched belly-up like a dead fish. He hadn't known where to put the plushie (he briefly considered the bathtub for hyperrealism, but it would be too much like Yoo Joonghyuk was watching him shower), so he just sort of left it there.
He browsed the ranking charts of the webnovel platform out of habit, but there were no good ones to read. He had another passive-aggressive email from his editor reminding him to stop taking a vacation and post already, but Kim Dokja didn't read that either. He set his phone down in disappointment and turned off the lamp on his side. He made sure to lie on his side facing away from his new roommate.
After a while, Yoo Joonghyuk put his laptop away and turned off his lamp. The room was enveloped in silky darkness, and the moon's pale fingers crept along the carpet towards the edge of Kim Dokja's bed. He could hear the quiet sounds of the other man's breathing on the other side of the room. It shouldn't have been reassuring, but it was.
"Did you grow up in Seoul?" Yoo Joonghyuk suddenly asked.
Kim Dokja's gut reaction was to respond with 'none of your business' just to give him a taste of his own medicine, but now that they were roommates he should probably make more of an effort to get along with him. Yoo Joonghyuk could definitely murder him in his sleep if he wanted to. Not that he was going to. Probably.
"Yes," he replied. Then, out of politeness, "did you?"
Yoo Joonghyuk ignored him. "Which schools did you go to?"
What was this, a national census? Maybe Yoo Joonghyuk was actually an advanced AI algorithm designed by the government. "There were multiple."
"Why?"
"Because I switched schools often when I was young."
"Why did you switch schools?"
It was late, and he was too tired to have a heart-to-heart with Yoo Joonghyuk about the skeletons in his closet. "Why are you even asking?"
"Answer the question."
"Is there a prize if I answer correctly?" Kim Dokja shot back, annoyed.
"Kim Dokja." Yoo Joonghyuk's voice was deep, and it echoed in the dark room like thunder. "Don't be difficult."
"Then tell me, why do you even want to know about my childhood? It's none of your business."
Yoo Joonghyuk didn't reply.
Kim Dokja sighed; of course there was no way he was going to get a straight answer out of him, the man was more tight-lipped than he was. A reasonable person would acknowledge the question and explain or reciprocate with their own story, but Yoo Joonghyuk always plowed ahead without looking back and expected everyone else to match his pace. His mind truly worked in mysterious ways that were incomprehensible to the average human.
Maybe he was trying to get his information so he could commit identity fraud and imprison him to ensure his romantic victory with Lee Seolhwa, Kim Dokja theorized. But they weren't even romantic rivals; wouldn't it be more logical to go after Lee Hyunsung first? Or maybe he was going to methodically get rid of them one at a time. Still, Kim Namwoon's threat level was higher—
"Go to bed," said Yoo Joonghyuk, startling him for the second time that night.
"How did you know I was awake?"
"I can hear you thinking."
Well, he had been slandering Yoo Joonghyuk's name in his mind after all. No wonder the man noticed. "You go to bed first. Don't you have to take care of your skin for commercials?"
"Good night."
His words were obviously meant to be a dismissal, but Kim Dokja's heart still softened a little. It was the first time someone had said that to him in years. When his insomnia was at its worst in his adolescence, he used to lie awake in bed for hours and hours, wishing that someone would knock on his door and tell him to go to sleep. No one ever did, and he eventually grew out of it on his own.
"Good night."
It was strange how he always found the things he was looking for in unexpected places.