"Perona, you are useless."
"Useless?!" Perona's voice cracked like thunder. "I am useless? Who was the one who got captured five seconds into the mission? I can't believe my captain is this weak! If you weren't such a cursed little cutie, I'd have ditched this crew long ago!"
Three figures stood awkwardly—no, dangled awkwardly—on a random puff of cloud in the middle of nowhere, trussed up from neck to toe in thick rope. Surrounding them was a crowd of furious Skypieans. At the front stood none other than Gan Fall, the stoic "God" of Skypiea, looking more tired than divine.
Two of the prisoners—Perona and Ezio—deserved the ropes. After all, they had caused a minor apocalyptic disturbance in the city. The third, however—sweet, innocent Conis—was only tied up because she made the unfortunate life choice of joining their crew. Guilt by association, apparently.
Ezio, despite being bound, turned to Conis with an annoyingly affectionate grin. "I'm so glad you joined us, Conis. You're truly loyal."
Perona gagged dramatically. "Ugh. Get a room. A prison cell would do."
From somewhere in the crowd, a familiar voice shrieked: "MY DAUGHTER!"
Papaya, Conis's frantic father, shoved through the mob. "Let her go! She's innocent! She has nothing to do with these scoundrels!"
"Quiet, old man!" barked McKinley, grabbing him by the arm and dragging him back. "She admitted she's one of them. She's just as guilty."
Gan Fall stepped forward, eyes grim. "You three have committed serious crimes. And now… you shall face our highest punishment."
Before any of them could react, they were dragged to the very edge of the cloud. The endless blue sky yawned below, stretching far, far down to the Blue Sea. A fall of… what? A thousand meters? Ten thousand?
Gan Fall gave them a final look. "Good luck… on your way back home."
And with that, they were shoved off the cloud.
They plummeted.
Three flailing bodies, screaming through the open sky, nothing beneath them but the promise of terminal velocity.
"THEY JUST THREW US OFF THE CLOUD?!!" Perona shrieked in disbelief, hair and limbs flailing in every direction.
"OH MAN," Ezio yelled, clutching his face mid-fall. "I really don't know if my luck is good enough for this!"
"Actually," Conis said cheerfully, casually rotating mid-air like she was practicing skydiving, "I think I'll be fine."
Lightning crackled from her left arm.
Perona's jaw dropped. "What the hell?!"
"Oh yeah!" Conis grinned. "I accidentally ate that weird fruit you left at my house. Turns out, I'm now made of literal lightning! Neat, right?"
Ezio's eyes went wide. "No way... That was one of the most powerful Devil Fruits in the world… and she just snacked on it."
"NICE FOR YOU THAT YOU'RE GONNA SURVIVE," Perona snapped, "but if we hit the ocean, even lightning girl's gonna drown!"
"Why?" Conis asked, tilting her head mid-freefall.
Ezio groaned. "Because anyone who eats a Devil Fruit can't swim. It's the curse."
"Oh," said Conis thoughtfully. "What's an ocean?"
Ezio and Perona screamed in unison.
…
"Hina is a warrior of justice."
Hina stood tall before the mirror, back straight, chin lifted in determined pride. She nodded once—confidently, resolutely.
"Hina is the strongest."
And she wasn't wrong. On her island, Hina was the strongest. That's why, despite her young age, she had been appointed leader of the island's guards—the first line of defense against any who dared threaten their peaceful home.
"Hina is the smartest."
Well... perhaps not exactly. While Hina had a brilliant mind for strategy and an uncanny instinct for battle tactics, she occasionally displayed a puzzling lack of common sense. She could plan an ambush in her sleep but once got stuck inside her own training dummy for half a day.
As she patrolled the village, an old woman approached her, squinting up at the girl in full battle armor.
"Hello, dear. What's your name?"
"Hina is Hina," she replied, entirely serious.
The old woman blinked. "Well then, hello Hina. What can I do for Hina?"
Hina's eyes narrowed with focused intensity. "Our island is currently under attack. All civilians must evacuate and find shelter. The guards will protect this land."
The old woman let out a startled shriek and dashed back into her home, dragging her bewildered husband by the hand as if the pirates were already at the door.
Hina nodded in satisfaction. That was the proper response.
This wasn't the first pirate raid, nor would it be the last. Time and again, Hina had led her guards to victory, capturing the intruders and handing them over to the Marines. They had even offered her a position in their ranks—a prestigious invitation, one many her age would dream of. And she had considered it. More than once.
But something always held her back.
Yes, joining the Marines would give her more power, more reach, and the opportunity to fight evil across the seas. But it would also mean leaving her island, her people. She couldn't protect her home if she were off chasing criminals in faraway lands.
And Hina—well, Hina was a warrior of this island.
For now, that was enough.
Hina stood tall at the edge of the beach, flanked by hundreds of her loyal guards. Before her, the horizon cracked with thunder as a shadow loomed—an enormous pirate ship, its black sails flapping like the wings of a beast.
"That's him," muttered her second-in-command, voice tight. "Fetish Boy Johnson. This is going to be bad."
Hina raised an eyebrow. "That's a peculiar name."
"It's... earned," her second said grimly. "Hina, I'm not sure we can win this one."
A horrible cackle echoed over the waves.
"Duahuahuaqhuahua!"
From the ship, a monstrous man leapt ashore. Bald, big-nosed, and grotesquely large, he wore nothing but torn pants. Despite the absurdity of his appearance, his presence radiated power—wrong, distorted, dangerous.
Then the impossible happened.
From his outstretched hands erupted dark, metallic bands—black steel, alive and writhing. In seconds, Hina's entire force was trapped in cages of unnatural metal. Screams filled the air as the steel twisted around limbs, pinning them in place. The guards fought valiantly, but the steel responded to thought, tightening and binding faster than they could resist.
"Hina, run!" her second shouted, even as the steel snaked around her. "He's a Devil Fruit user! We can't fight him like this!"
Hina gritted her teeth. She was Hina. Running wasn't in her nature.
She charged forward, rage burning in her chest. She would not let her people fall!
But before her kick could reach the pirate captain, another figure slipped between them—a wiry, slick-haired man with an oily grin.
"You would strike my captain mid-fun?" he sneered. "How rude."
Suddenly, a massive wall of wool surged up from the ground, absorbing Hina's kick like a mattress. She stumbled back, momentarily stunned.
"I ate the Wool-Wool Fruit," he announced proudly. "I can create and control wool at will. Soft, strong… suffocating."
White fluff exploded across the battlefield, blanketing half the island, choking streets and homes in its dense mass.
Before Hina could react again, the black steel came for her. It coiled around her limbs, pulled her into the sky, and suspended her above the chaos—forced to witness the devastation of everything she had sworn to protect.
Below, Fetish Boy Johnson grinned. "Such fire in your eyes. You'll be a fine prize. But good things come last."
He turned to his crew.
"Raid the island! Take anything of value! And burn what's left!"
"AYE, CAPTAIN!"
From her helpless vantage point, Hina watched in horror. The pirates tore through homes. They knocked aside the old and the young alike. People screamed from within the wool-clouds as the black steel wrapped around them one by one. The guards had fallen. The people were defenseless.
And she—Hina, leader of the island's defenders—was trapped, powerless.
Her fists clenched against the steel bindings, and her fury burned hotter than ever.
This wasn't the end.
It couldn't be.
It was then Hina heard the screams.
Her eyes snapped upward, and what she saw made her question reality for the second time that day.
Three people were falling from the sky.
The first was a blonde girl, oddly serene despite plummeting toward the earth. She had the calm grace of someone either truly fearless—or totally unaware of the danger.
The second was a gothic girl dressed in black and pink, shouting expletives that made even Hina's ears burn. She was directing her rage at the third member of their group—a boy currently screaming as he plummeted headfirst toward Hina.
And then—he crashed. Directly into her.
"OOF—!"
Before she could react, he latched onto her like a monkey finding its favorite tree, arms and legs clinging tight.
"YES!" he shouted triumphantly, grinning like a maniac. "Still lucky enough, bitches!"
Meanwhile, his companions landed softly on the thick cloud of wool that blanketed the island below. Somehow, not a scratch on them.
"I can't believe we survived that!" said the gothic girl—Perona—throwing her hands up. "Damn those sky people! Who just throws people out of the clouds?!"
"I was never worried," Conis replied with a dreamy smile, gently bouncing on the wool. "This feels just like home. Almost as fluffy as Skypiean clouds!"
"Most islands don't have wool floors, you shiny-feathered cloud-dweller," Perona grumbled. "We're probably in the Grand Line again. This place is insane."
Up above, Hina twisted her neck to glare at the boy clinging to her like a koala.
"Excuse Hina," she said, voice deadpan. "Could you please help Hina out of this?"
Ezio blinked, finally registering the black steel bindings pinning her in place. "Whoa. Did you… tie yourself up, Black Cage? What kind of hobby are we talking about here?"
"HINA DID NOT TIE HERSELF UP!" she snapped. "And what is this 'Black Cage' nonsense?"
Ezio's eyes gleamed with sudden interest. "Wait, that's not your power? Huh. That changes things." He paused, tilting his head as if calculating odds. "By the way, your fortune isn't bad. Not bad at all."
Hina stared at him, furious and confused. "How is Hina's fortune not bad?! Hina is trapped, humiliated, and her island is under siege!"
Ezio gave her a relaxed grin. "Yeah, but you've got us now."
From below, Perona shouted, "Don't flatter yourself! I didn't sign up to save random tied-up warriors just because my captain is cute!"
"Cute?" Ezio blinked.
"Shut up!" Perona snapped, face flushed. "I didn't say that!"
Conis simply lay on the wool, hands behind her head. "This island's really nice. Do you think they have dials here?"
Perona groaned.
This day couldn't possibly get any stranger.
Could it?
"Hm…" Ezio eyed the black steel bindings wrapped tightly around Hina's body. He gave them a gentle poke, then shrugged. "Well. I'm just a regular guy. I can't break steel with my bare hands, so… yeah. You're kinda stuck, Hina."
Hina sighed heavily. "Useless. Completely useless."
Before Ezio could reply, Conis floated up beside them—floated, with the lower half of her body dissolving into raw lightning.
"Since when can you fly?!" Ezio squawked.
"I'm lightning," Conis said, tilting her head. "Isn't it obvious?"
"NO!" Ezio and Perona shouted in perfect unison from opposite sides.
Perona, hovering on her own ghostly mist, drifted up beside them with an unimpressed expression.
"Why is everyone flying but me?!" Ezio asked the heavens.
"I'm the Ghost Princess," Perona sniffed proudly, hands on hips. "Isn't that obvious?"
"NO!" Ezio and Hina snapped together.
There was a long pause. Just four people hovering awkwardly in the sky—two annoyed, one confused, one smug.
"Then why were you freaking out when they threw us off the clouds?!" Ezio asked, utterly baffled. "You both can fly! Couldn't you have just caught us or something?"
"Oh."
Perona and Conis blinked, glancing at each other like the thought had just occurred to them.
"Right... we can fly."
There was a long pause. Just four people hovering awkwardly in the sky.
Then Ezio pointed down at the beach, where the chaos was still going strong. He figured it was safer for his sanity to just not ask.
"Okay, Conis. You see that bald giant? The guy spitting wool like it's a fashion show? The squad of creeps who look like banned Halloween costumes?"
"Yes?" Conis blinked, as if she hadn't quite noticed the battlefield.
"Think you could, I don't know… zap them into oblivion?"
"Hm." Conis tapped her chin. "I can try."
Her eyes suddenly lit up, turning into radiant bolts of electricity. Power crackled around her, dancing across her skin. She no longer looked like an innocent sky-girl—she looked like the storm itself.
Ezio's jaw dropped. "Okay. Okay, I definitely didn't see that coming."
Conis raised a single finger toward the sky.
A moment passed.
Nothing.
Then—
CRACK—BOOOOM!
Dozens of bolts of lightning ripped down from the heavens, each one surgically striking pirate after pirate. Screams erupted as they were electrocuted, their weapons exploding in sparks. Chaos erupted in their ranks.
And then, with an earth-shaking ROAR, a final colossal beam of divine lightning surged down—obliterating Fetish Boy Johnson and his wool-weaving sidekick in one blinding flash.
When the light faded, the battlefield was silent.
The wool cloud that had blanketed the island disintegrated into mist.
The black steel binding Hina and her guards vanished with a shimmer.
The pirates were gone.
Just like that.
Conis floated back down, now entirely human again. She blinked, smiling softly. "Did that help?"
Ezio stared, mouth hanging open.
Perona dropped to the ground in disbelief.
Hina, finally freed, stood in stunned silence.
"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Ezio finally yelled.
Hina nodded slowly, brushing dust off her uniform. "Hina has… reconsidered your usefulness."
Ezio turned to Conis, pointing at her like she was a cheat code that somehow slipped past the developers. "You—YOU—can do stuff like that without even a training arc?!"
Perona muttered under her breath, "Mental note: never piss off the lightning angel."
Conis blinked, tilting her head in pure innocence. "Did I do something bad?"
"By the way," Ezio said suddenly, his voice almost annoyingly chipper considering the destruction around them, "Hina, you've got strength, a knack for surviving impossible situations, and an unbelievable amount of luck... honestly, you'd be a perfect fit for my crew." He grinned like he'd just handed her the keys to a treasure chest. "So, what do you think? Ready to join?"
Hina looked at him flatly. "Let Hina get this straight. You're inviting Hina—who was dangling uselessly in midair while a lightning girl did all the work—to join a crew that literally fell out of the sky?"
Ezio nodded with unwavering enthusiasm. "Exactly!"
Hina sighed. "...Fine. Hina accepts."
"Seriously?!"
"But only because Hina suspects being around you people will be less stressful than doing paperwork for the next three years."
Perona raised an eyebrow. "That's a bold assumption."
Conis beamed. "We're like a family!"
"Hina had a family," Hina muttered. "They made her eat broccoli."
Ezio beamed. "Welcome aboard!"
Perona floated by with a dry smile. "Great. Another emotionally stable lunatic joins the chaos circus."
Hina cracked her knuckles. "Hina looks forward to the dysfunction."