"Heehee, little bro! You must be the reason this whole universe is suddenly full of unknown variables, right?"
Aha's clown mask swiveled toward Yuki, speaking slowly. The mask wore a joyful grin, but honestly, it was deeply unsettling.
"Oh? What gave it away?" Yuki smirked, amused.
"Of course! Aha knew from the moment Aha saw you that you're stronger than Aha. Even stronger than most Aeons. In you, Aha sees everything!"
Aha laid the flattery on thick.
"You're something beyond Aha's understanding! The source of it all! The master of everything!" The more the Aeon talked, the more animated they became like a fanatic follower heaping praise on their deity.
Yuki just kept smirking. "So, what's your real reason for coming to the Astral Express?"
He casually sat down on the sofa, not even offering the Aeon a seat. No one else in the universe would dare disrespect an Aeon like this. But Yuki? He simply didn't care.
March followed suit, plopping down securely beside him. Himeko hesitated for a brief second, then sat nearby.
The three of them sat there, facing Aha, who was still standing, it looked exactly like they were interrogating a criminal.
Aha looked at the setup and burst into laughter.
"Heehee! Aha knows this scene!"
With a theatrical flourish, a pair of heavy iron handcuffs materialized on Aha's dark, amorphous form. They hung their head—well, their mask—in exaggerated shame. The mask's grin vanished, seamlessly replaced by a dejected, weeping expression.
"Reporting to the officer! Aha was forced here by the Destruction! They threatened Aha!"
"That Destruction creep threatened Aha's dear Peppa! Made Aha do their dirty work!"
"Aha's been forced to do countless terrible things across the universe! Please, officer, see the truth! Save Aha! Save Peppa!"
The mask's expressions shifted dramatically as Aha spun the wild tale, painting themselves as the helpless victim and blaming everything on the Aeon of Destruction.
"The Destruction? Nanook?"
"Sure, that Aeon's track record is incredibly violent. But you're an Aeon too. How could they blackmail you?" Himeko frowned, deeply skeptical. The story was entirely too far-fetched.
"Don't bother, Himeko. He's lying," Yuki rolled his eyes at the Jester God.
This guy would do anything for entertainment—even casually frame Nanook to stir up a cosmic conflict between the Express and the Destruction, just to grab some popcorn and watch the chaos unfold. Yuki didn't even need his omniscience or telepathy to see through this blatant nonsense.
Peppa? Wasn't that a cartoon pink pig?
"Heehee! Absolutely not! Aha swears! Aha is not lying! If Aha is, then Peppa's a pig!" Aha declared with the utmost, theatrical sincerity.
"Why would Peppa get punished for you breaking your oath?! That's so shameless!" March couldn't help but complain at the ridiculous logic.
"Because Peppa is already a pig," Yuki stated the obvious.
So, yeah. Aha was definitely lying.
"Enough with the games. I've known what you were up to all along. Why do you think all those bombs you kept sending to the train disappeared?"
"I collected them."
Yuki waved his hand, and countless objects suddenly materialized in the air.
Gift boxes of all shapes, colors, and sizes filled the ceiling of the Parlor Car, floating silently. Himeko and March stared, stunned, as the colorful boxes drifted above them. It took a few seconds for the horrific realization to sink in.
"Wait."
"Yuki... are you saying this guy's been planting bombs on the train?!" March's voice trembled with sudden alarm as she turned to him.
Yuki nodded lightly.
"For the ten minutes after the train launched, they've been tailing us, trying to get on board. But I set up some rules—Aeons can't just waltz in. So they've been lurking outside."
"Then, when that got boring, they started teleporting bombs inside. Trying to blow up the train. It's not the first time they've pulled this, is it, Aha?" Yuki glanced at the Aeon, recounting the events matter-of-factly.
The two women's expressions instantly shifted to one of intense hostility and high alert.
Bombs on the train? They were trying to kill them!
A quick count of the confiscated boxes floating in the air... if each one was a high-yield explosive... that was hundreds of boxes. Enough to blow the train up hundreds of times over.
Survival would be impossible. Even if by some absolute miracle they lived through the initial blasts, they'd be stranded in the vacuum of deep space with no way to survive.
"You're awful!"
"We didn't do anything to you! Why would you try to blow us up?!" March glared at Aha, sheer fury written all over her face.
Without Yuki, they'd probably be dead already. A massive wave of gratitude washed over her.
"March, asking that is pointless. The Aeon of Elation only acts for one single reason: entertainment," Himeko shook her head, stating a cold, cosmic fact.
"So blowing up the Astral Express is entertainment?! That's completely messed up!" March's cheeks puffed with rage as she glared daggers at the clown masks.
"Yuki, you said this isn't the first time. Have they done this before? Bombed the Express?" Himeko latched onto another detail, turning to him with serious curiosity.
"Mm-hmm. In the past, they tricked Akivili and the Nameless. Posed as an ordinary person and infiltrated the Express for over a year. Then, when the moment was right, they blew half the train—and an entire adjacent planet—to cosmic dust."
"Pom-Pom knows all about it. If you ask them, they'll tell you," Yuki nodded, recounting Aha's most infamous prank on the Express crew.
And Aha? They looked almost proud, the masks beaming with absolute delight.
"Heehee haha! Fun, right? Oh, that was a good one! Kept Aha amused for several entire Amber Eras!" Aha spoke nostalgically, like they were bragging about some great, philanthropic achievement.
Speak of the devil—just as they mentioned Pom-Pom, the little conductor emerged from the dining car doors.
The exact moment that fluffy, short-legged, long-eared rabbit laid eyes on Aha's shifting forms...
It was like a dramatic scene-change in an opera. The overwhelming contentment from eating Yuki's cloned pie and doughnuts vanished in an instant.
It was replaced by pure, unadulterated fury.
"YOU!!!"
"You absolute worst Nameless in history!"
"The one who blew my train in half!!!"
Pom-Pom charged forward on their tiny legs, completely forgetting their fear of Aeons, entirely ready to throw hands.