Chapter 85: BATTLE ROYALE (2)
FANG YUAN VS. TANG XIONG (IT'S GIVING ONE-SIDED BEATDOWN)
Tang Xiong, FLEXING HIS GYATT: "LIL BRO, YOU KILLED MY BROTHER? PREPARE TO GET FOLDED."
Fang Yuan, CASUALLY: "Oh? SKILL ISSUE."
ROUND 1:
CLASH!
Fang Yuan NO-SELLS Tang Xiong's charge.
Audience: "GYATT DAMN, HE'S BUILT DIFFERENT?!"
ROUND 2:
Tang Xiong activates BEAR STRENGTH PHANTOM (RIZZ LEVEL: OVER 9000).
Fang Yuan gets YEETED but lands like a cat.
Fang Yuan, INTERNALLY: "Hmm. ANYWAY."
ROUND 3:
Fang Yuan switches to RANGED ATTACKS (Blood Moon Gu go BRRRR).
Tang Xiong, BLEEDING OUT: "BRO, THIS IS NOT IT."
RESULT: Tang Xiong FOLDS, Fang Yuan takes his GRAND BEAR GU.
TWITCH CHAT REACTS:
💀 "BRO REALLY WENT FROM FISTS TO KITING LIKE A LEAGUE PLAYER"
🔥 "TANG XIONG'S MALDING LEVEL: MAXIMUM COPING"
🐍 "FANG YUAN'S UNBOTHERED ERA CONTINUES"
LEGENDARY GU HUNT (IT'S GIVING NPC QUEST FAIL)
Fang Yuan MALDING over missing legendary Gu:
"WHERE THE GYATT IS IT?!"
Checks gambling den again. STILL NOTHING.
Fang Yuan, INTERNALLY SCREAMING: "MY ENTIRE STRENGTH PATH IS COOKED."
ENTER: LI RAN (NPC WITH MAIN CHARACTER ENERGY)
Lives like a RIZZLESS mess (gambling, brothels, debt).
But SECRETLY visits ex-wife & son EVERY 10 DAYS.
Fang Yuan, SUSPICIOUS: "Bro's FAKING the NPC lifestyle."
FLASH OF INSPIRATION GU (BIG BRAIN TIME)
Fang Yuan SPENDS 29K PRIMEVAL STONES on a ONE-TIME USE GU (desperate hours).
Effect: IQ +1000 for 5 SECONDS.
Fang Yuan, REALIZING: "LI RAN'S SCHEDULE IS TOO PERFECT… HE'S HIDING SOMETHING."
TWIST REVEAL:
Li Ran WASN'T peeking at the brothel's #1 LADY.
He was WATCHING HIS EX-WIFE & SON from afar.
Fang Yuan, EUREKA MOMENT: "THE LEGENDARY GU ISN'T IN THE STONE—IT'S IN HIM."
LI RAN'S SECRET PAST (IT'S GIVING SPY MOVIE FLASHBACK)
Wu Clan Leader: "Wu Ran, will you sacrifice your GYATT, your RIZZ, and your LIFE for the clan?"
Wu Ran (Li Ran): "SHEEEESH, YES!"
CUT TO: 8 YEARS LATER
Li Ran (Undercover): "I've been NPC-ing so long I forgot my own name…"
Also Li Ran: "But soon… MY DEMONIC GLOW-UP ARC BEGINS!"
FANG YUAN'S 500 IQ PLAY
Fang Yuan, SNEAKING INTO LI RAN'S HOUSE:
"Oh? A SECRET COMPARTMENT under the bed? SUS."
"FLOWERBUD GU? Let me just… YOINK."
Finds the LEGENDARY GU STELLAR STONE: "GYATT DAMN, FINALLY!"
Li Ran, MID-BATTLE: "WAIT, WHY CAN'T I FEEL MY STORAGE GU?!"
Opponent: "Free win? BET."
HEART SOUND GU MIND GAMES (IT'S GIVING PSYCHOLOGICAL TERROR)
Fang Yuan, USING HEART SOUND GU: "Li Ran… or should I say… WU RAN?"
Li Ran, SWEATING BULLETS: "OH NAH, HE KNOWS."
Fang Yuan's Instructions:
"Walk out, turn left."
"Now right, third junction."
"SKIP TO FIVE."
Li Ran: "BRO CAN'T EVEN COUNT?!"
Final Destination: FU TAI XIANG HE RESTAURANT (Li Ran's usual spot).
Li Ran, TRAUMATIZED: "He's been STALKING ME harder than a Twitch mod."
FACE TO FACE (IT'S GIVING FINAL BOSS MEETING)
Li Ran: "You're just a KID?!"
Fang Yuan, SMIRKING: "Age is just a number, SKILL ISSUE is eternal."
Li Ran, INTERNALLY: "This EDGY TEEN just ruined my 8-YEAR SPY ARC."
Fang Yuan, LEANING BACK: "So… about that LEGENDARY GU…"
TWITCH CHAT REACTS:
💀 "BRO REALLY WENT FROM GU HUNT TO SPY THRILLER IN 2 CHAPTERS"
🔥 "TOP 10 FANG YUAN QUOTES: 'Age is just a number'"
🐍 "LI RAN'S MALDING COULD POWER A CITY"