Friday, September 13, 2010
[Dunphy House]
Earlier that day, Andrew had played his second game with Mater Dei, another preseason friendly.
This time, the opponent was a solid team from the San Diego section, but slightly weaker than Narbonne from LAUSD.
As expected, Mater Dei won comfortably again: 41–21, this time on the road.
Andrew even outdid his debut performance, with stats of 5 touchdowns (4 passing and 1 rushing), 320 passing yards, and 0 interceptions.
One of those passes was particularly eye-catching: a 23-yard throw to Nick, the running back.
No one in the stadium expected a mid-range pass to an RB—let alone such a perfectly placed one. Nick caught the ball and, with open field ahead, ran another 10 yards into the end zone.
Typically, a pass to a running back is between 5 and 15 yards, and anything over 15 requires either an RB with exceptional hands or a QB with pinpoint accuracy to make it an easy catch for the RB in stride. In this case, it was the latter.
In just two games, Andrew had already totaled 9 TDs and over 600 passing yards.
His goal wasn't just to win titles with Mater Dei, he wanted to have the best season of his High School career and the best in the program's history.
Among the benchmarks to beat was Matt Barkley, a Mater Dei legend who, in 2007 as a junior, threw for 3,576 yards and 35 TDs, completing 63% of his passes with 9 interceptions. That year, he was named the Gatorade National Football Player of the Year.
Barkley ended up ranked as the nation's No. 1 prospect in the Class of 2009 by ESPN, Rivals, and 247Sports.
Even so, despite his individual season, he couldn't end Mater Dei's sectional championship drought, falling in the semifinals. His averages that year: 3.5 TDs per game and 0.9 interceptions.
Someone comparing those numbers to Andrew's freshman year at Palisades: 72 TDs in 13 games (5.5 per game), might think Barkley's performance wasn't all that impressive, especially since he didn't even win a sectional title.
But the truth is, a Division 1 QB in California, or in any top state, rarely averages numbers that high. The elite defenses at that level are far superior to what a QB faces in lower divisions.
Even so, what Andrew achieved at Palisades is still considered extraordinary by scouts and analysts: he put up those numbers in a mediocre school that had never made the playoffs, and did it with a medium-to-deep passing game, not an inflated short-pass system.
In lower divisions, you might see similar or even better stats than Andrew's, but they're often inflated by the system.
Example: Ben Mauk, Kenton High School (Ohio, Division IV). In 2002, he recorded 76 TDs and 6,540 yards, breaking state records.
Yet in Rivals, ESPN, and 247Sports, Ben was rated only a 3-star prospect and received just three scholarship offers.
Why? He played in a pure Air Raid offense, with over 600 pass attempts and almost exclusively short routes, many throws under 10 yards that receivers turned into long gains.
By contrast, Andrew at Palisades didn't have that kind of system, nor star receivers besides his friend Steve, nor weak opposition, quite the opposite.
He had to lead a team that, until the previous year, lost to those very same rivals. It wasn't easy: the only good players were his friends he had trained with since they were kids, plus the occasional senior who could be considered decent, like Liam.
Without an inflated scheme, without relying on short passes, and while lifting his school out of mediocrity, he still managed 72 TDs in a single season, then 60 TDs the following year in a higher division after the team was promoted.
For this reason, many powerhouse high schools, including Mater Dei, wanted to recruit him. And after his performance at Dana Hills, prestigious and historic colleges like USC, Georgia, UCLA, Oregon, and more rushed to secure him with official visit offers and scholarship deals.
They didn't want to wait to see him play officially with Mater Dei, scouts who had watched his previous seasons and his showing at Dana Hills recognized it was real, elite talent, and that he would put up strong numbers in the official season. They were not wrong.
In fact, everyone was impressed: scouts, analysts, fans, even Bruce and the coaching staff, were surprised that in just two games, Andrew already had 9 TDs. He had exceeded expectations.
If he kept this pace and played the same 9 games Max had the previous season, he could finish with over 40 TDs, easily surpassing Barkley's national award-winning year.
The following Friday would be the debut in the prestigious Trinity League, against Orange Lutheran.
Meanwhile, Andrew kept receiving offers and persistent messages from colleges eager to schedule an official campus visit.
But right now, that was the farthest thing from his mind.
He was at his aunt and uncle's house, in the middle of a Monopoly game with: Pippa, Alex, Haley, Leonard, Luke, Howard, and Willa.
"Come on, Luke!" Alex exclaimed, holding a wad of bills and frowning. "Sell me Tennessee Avenue! I'll give you $300, almost double what it's worth!"
The game had been going on for over two hours. All eight players, the maximum allowed, had bought every property on the board, but no one had a complete set to start building houses or hotels.
The reason for this stalemate had a first and last name: Luke Dunphy.
By sheer luck, Luke had managed to get one property of each color, blocking any monopolies. And to top it off, he refused to accept any offer. Not for money, not for properties, not for a combination of both.
"No, no," Luke replied, shaking his head as if it were a matter of principle.
"$350!" Alex raised the offer.
"Pass," Luke said without blinking.
"Luke!" Alex insisted. "Your properties are all over the place and you barely have $400. If you keep this up, you're going to go bankrupt."
"I can mortgage," Luke said with a shrug. "I'm not getting scammed again. You always do it."
"Tsch… the ones who scam you are usually Mom, Andrew, or Haley. Not me," Alex defended herself. "My deal is fair."
"You hear that, cousin?" Haley said, looking at Andrew in mock surprise. "They're slandering us!"
"Pure defamation," Andrew replied, crossing his arms. "All my deals in this game are fair."
"So are mine," Haley added, nodding solemnly.
Alex rolled her eyes. She knew talking to those two was pointless, so she decided to change her target. She turned her head toward Howard.
"You…" Alex said in an accusatory tone. "You should have bought Tennessee Avenue. If you had, we wouldn't be stuck like this."
"What?" Howard raised an eyebrow. "Now it's my fault, Miss Tennessee?"
Alex frowned at the nickname.
"Besides," Howard continued, without a hint of remorse, "it went to auction. You could have bid. Not my fault you're stingy."
"Stingy?" Alex repeated, outraged. "Luke bid $525! I wasn't going to pay that much for something worth $180."
Andrew raised an eyebrow. "And you call us scammers… You want to pay Luke $350 when he spent over $500."
"Oh… how cruel," Haley added with fake drama. "And to your own little brother. The real scammer here is you, Alex."
Alex opened her mouth to retort but stopped when she saw Luke's expression: a mix of horror and betrayal, as if he were looking at the biggest criminal in history.
"Whatever…" she muttered, stepping away from the negotiation. She wasn't going to give up, but she knew she wouldn't get anywhere right now.
"Luke, I know you don't want to take offers, but at least hear me out…" Pippa said, stepping into the negotiation with calculated calm.
At this point, everyone knew that if they couldn't convince Luke, no one could build houses, and without houses, there was no way to start bleeding everyone else dry financially.
"I'll give you $450 for Park Place, which cost you $350. That's over a hundred in profit…" Pippa began in a calm, steady tone. "And not only that: I'll also give you St. James Place, worth $180. In total, $630. With St. James Place, you could trade with Alex for the one you're missing and have all three of the same color… What do you say?"
Her method was direct, logical, and without pressure.
"Don't listen to her, Padawan!" Howard jumped in, alarmed. "That smooth, persuasive tone is the dark side! If she puts a hotel on Park Place, we're disintegrated in one shot, fifteen hundred dollars!"
Pippa shot him a glare but didn't lose her composure.
"It's a good offer, Luke," Andrew chimed in, arms crossed. "Besides, the blues are only two, and it's hard for anyone to land on them. And the houses are expensive, she won't be able to build right away."
Howard looked at him as if he'd just seen a traitor in his own ranks, "You're one of those who helps his girlfriend?"
"She's not helping me," Pippa replied naturally. "It's just logic."
"Exactly," Andrew nodded. "I'm a logical man."
"If she puts houses there, it's the end for all of us," Willa said seriously, joining the conversation.
Leonard nodded several times, as if in a crisis meeting.
Alex, for her part, wasn't as opposed. If Luke took Pippa's offer, it would open the door for her to negotiate with him, and that suited her.
Plus, Andrew was right: the blues weren't exactly the easiest to collect on, and between the cost of the houses and the time it would take to put up a hotel, there would be time to survive.
Luke lowered his gaze to the Park Place card. Fifteen hundred dollars in rent with a hotel… Then he looked at his increasingly thin stack of bills. He hesitated for a few seconds, took a deep breath… and shook his head.
"No, thanks. Although it's a much better offer than Alex's."
"Alright…" Pippa replied, accepting the rejection without any drama.
Howard, Leonard, and Willa let out a sigh of relief, as if they had just dodged an execution.
As for Andrew, he didn't mind the stalemate, he was comfortable. He had three railroads bringing in a steady cash flow, and as long as no one could build houses, his position was solid.
"Now it's my turn," Willa said with a confident smile, placing three bills in the center of the board: two hundreds and one twenty. "Luke, I'll buy Kentucky Avenue from you for two hundred and twenty. What do you say?"
The room fell into an odd silence.
"Two hundred and twenty?" Luke repeated, looking at the bills and then at Willa.
Howard broke the silence with a chuckle he tried to stifle, but it was useless.
"What's so funny?" Willa asked, raising an eyebrow in a threatening tone.
"Nothing, nothing… It's just… only two hundred and twenty? That's exactly what the property is worth. And I called Alex stingy, but you just took the crown," Howard replied, provoking general laughter.
"I'm not stingy!" Willa protested. "I only have one red. It's not like I can build houses… I'd still need to get the other one."
Luke still had that "you're not convincing me" look.
"Fine, two hundred and forty," Willa added, confident that an extra twenty dollars would seal the deal.
"Wow… twenty more dollars. How generous, Willa," Andrew said sarcastically, prompting more laughter.
"Shut up… it's a logical price," she grumbled.
"No, thanks," Luke replied without blinking.
Willa grimaced but wasn't ready to give up so easily. "Okay… you like cheerleaders, right?"
Luke raised an eyebrow. "Yeah… why?"
"In addition to the two hundred and forty dollars, I'll do a cheerleading move. Whichever one you ask for," Willa said, as if it were her ace up her sleeve.
Alex's eyes went wide, and she immediately said, "Hey, that's not fair!"
"Why not? Money isn't the only form of exchange," Willa said with complete nonchalance.
Alex couldn't argue with the logic. A trade was a trade.
"Luke, don't listen to her!" Howard jumped in. "Sure, she's pretty like every cheerleader… but she sucks. She has no coordination and can't do those flips."
"Hey! You suck at sports too," Willa shot back, offended, though deep down she knew he wasn't entirely wrong.
"I know, but I admit it," Howard replied with a proud smile.
"Can you do a Toe Touch?" Luke suddenly asked.
"A what?" Willa frowned.
Howard pulled out his phone, searched YouTube, and showed her the video. Everyone leaned in over the screen.
There, a cheerleader launched herself into the air, legs fully extended at a perfect 180-degree angle, arms reaching toward her feet, and wearing a flawless smile. It was a move that required flexibility, strength, and coordination.
Willa watched in silence… and the moment she saw the cheerleader in the video touch both toes mid-air, she knew it was physically impossible for her. Not only would she hurt herself, she'd make a fool of herself in front of everyone.
Haley couldn't hold back a laugh. "Accept it, Willa. It'll be fun to watch you try."
Willa had too much pride to make a fool of herself.
"New offer… I'll give you two hundred and fifty, and none of that move stuff," Willa said quickly, trying to steer the conversation away.
'Ten more dollars?' everyone thought at the same time.
"No," Luke replied without blinking.
"Alright, my turn," Andrew said, clasping his hands on the table.
Luke glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, he knew that look all too well. That mix of confidence and cunning that meant only one thing… an offer so well crafted he'd end up taking it, even if it was a scam.
"Listen, cousin…" Andrew began. "I'll give you 280 for States Avenue. Exactly double. And not only that…" he paused dramatically. "Since trades are now allowed, I'll add something extra."
"Add what?" Luke asked, intrigued.
"You like cheerleaders, right?" Andrew repeated Willa's question, though he already knew the answer.
Luke nodded.
"As you know, I'm the new face and leader of Mater Dei. And we have a very high-level cheerleading squad…" Andrew smiled triumphantly. "I've got connections."
Luke's eyes lit up. He remembered the two Fridays he'd seen the Mater Dei cheerleaders in action: flawless red uniforms, sparkling pom-poms, perfect jumps, and the coordination of an army.
Led by Madison, the captain, they were light-years ahead of what he'd known at Palisades. And that was saying something, back there, Regina had been the best, but she practically carried the entire team on her own. At Mater Dei, talent overflowed, both on the football field and in the cheer squad.
"Exactly what you're thinking," Andrew went on. "I could ask Madison to get you onto the field during the league's opening game. You'd see them up close, way better than in those two previous performances."
Howard heard the offer and, for once, decided not to sabotage it. He knew how much that meant to Luke. Andrew getting three properties was nothing compared to making his Padawan's dream come true.
Luke was about to respond when a voice cut through the moment.
"Oh… so it seems you've gotten very friendly with this Madison and the other cheerleaders in just two weeks of classes…" Pippa said, in a sweet tone. Too sweet. The kind of sweetness that, to Andrew, sounded more like a warning than a compliment.
Andrew slowly turned his head toward her, "Excuse me?"
"Nothing… I'm just saying it's curious that you can get Luke onto the field while they're performing their show," Pippa said, smiling with her lips but not with her eyes.
"I'm not close to them… or to Madison. Just, being the starting QB, I've seen them a couple of times. And that was usually because of Victor and the others," Andrew defended himself quickly.
"So you'll have to ask them for a big favor. That'll bring you closer to her. And… who knows what the future might bring, maybe a new friend?" Pippa added, still wearing that poisoned smile.
Everyone watched the exchange like it was a tennis match.
Andrew stayed silent for a few seconds. Then, with a sigh, he turned back to Luke and said, "I'm changing my offer. Just 280 for the property, nothing else. Take it or leave it."
Pippa had a point. He wasn't close enough to Madison to ask for something like that. And if he did, he'd probably end up getting closer to her, which would bring him right back to the never-ending problem of female friendships and all that blah, blah, blah. It wasn't worth risking another conflict with Pippa over a simple Monopoly game.
Luke frowned, he'd been just about to accept Andrew's offer.
"No," he finally replied. Without the cheerleader part, 280 didn't seem worth it, especially if Andrew ended up with all three properties and could start building houses.
At that moment, Howard smiled as if he had been waiting for this chance all night.
"Oh…" Howard said in a theatrical tone. "I've prepared something for this."
He quickly pulled his phone from his pocket, tapped the screen a couple of times, and without warning, swung the hand holding it as if cracking a whip. From the phone's speaker came a perfect, sharp CRACK! straight out of an old western movie.
"And so, ladies and gentlemen…" Howard announced, barely containing his laughter, "the talented quarterback of Mater Dei withdraws his winning offer out of fear of his girlfriend."
Laughter exploded around the table. Andrew shot him a murderous glare, while Pippa brought a hand to her mouth to hide a victorious smile.
"Very funny, Howard," Andrew growled.
"Come on, Howard," Willa chimed in with a half-smile. "You're not exactly in a position to talk. I'm sure that the day you get a girlfriend, you'll be the kind of guy who does whatever she says without question."
Howard blinked, surprised. "What? Me?"
"Yes, you," Willa went on, crossing her arms. "The way you are… the moment your girlfriend smiles at you or says the magic word, you'll be wagging your tail like a little puppy."
The whole table nodded almost in unison.
"Totally," Haley said, amused.
"Magic word? What is it?" Luke asked innocently, looking to Andrew for answers.
Luckily for Andrew, he didn't have to explain, because the conversation flowed right along.
"I'd bet that if you had a girlfriend right now and she called you saying she was home alone because her parents went out, you'd drop everything and run straight to her, leaving us here," Leonard joked.
"Absolutely," everyone said at the same time, laughing.
"Shut up! I'm not that needy, I'm a man of principles," Howard protested, rising slightly from his seat. No one took him seriously.
"Alright, now it's time for my offer," he said at last, determined to change the subject before they kept calling him a lapdog. "Luke, my good friend… I'm offering you $350 for Pennsylvania and a trade: an unreleased video of cheerleaders doing a rarely seen stunt."
He lowered his voice on the last part, as if revealing a state secret.
"No way," Haley jumped in before her brother could answer.
"What? Why are you sabotaging me?" Howard asked, indignant.
"Because I'm not letting you show weird cheerleader videos to my brother. And also, it's for your own good: my mom is this close" she made a small gap with her fingers, "to beating you up if she finds out you're still being a bad influence on him."
"What? Your mom? She likes me," Howard said, confused.
He'd known Claire, Andrew's aunt, for a while, and had never had any issues with her. He'd even say Andrew's family treated him with a certain affection as a long-time close friend.
"You seriously think my mom likes you?" Alex asked, looking at him in disbelief.
"Yeah, why wouldn't she? Phil loves me, we even do magic tricks together," Howard replied sincerely. With Phil, there was no doubt they got along great.
"Of course… because Phil is the father you never had," Willa said with a venomous smile.
Andrew and Leonard burst out laughing instantly.
"Okay, that was a good one," Andrew said, nodding in approval.
"Very good," Leonard added, still laughing.
Howard rolled his eyes, not offended. Among the four of them, that kind of sharp humor was just part of daily life.
"Willa's right," Andrew added. "I can totally picture my uncle at your wedding, giving the toast like he was your father and blessing you."
"My dad would be fine with that, but I can't imagine the part where you find a girlfriend willing to marry you," Haley said, delivering the final blow.
Leonard almost choked with laughter, Willa covered her face while laughing, Pippa did the same, and even Alex let out a chuckle, which was an achievement in itself.
'These guys…' Howard thought. He knew that if he opened his mouth, they'd only make it worse, so he decided to move on.
"New offer," he said at last, shifting in his chair. "Three hundred fifty for Pennsylvania. Nothing else."
He didn't mention anything about the cheerleader video; he knew that if he brought it up again, he'd end up with double trouble from Haley and Claire.
Luke frowned at him.
"No," he replied firmly, crossing his arms. He was visibly annoyed, every cheerleader-related offer had ended up withdrawn or sabotaged.
Haley was the next to try to convince Luke, but her offer failed to sway him.
Lastly, it was Leonard's turn. No one at the table had any faith he could close the deal… and yet, he did.
With a straightforward, no-tricks negotiation, Leonard bought Baltic Avenue from Luke for $300, five times its original price. It was the cheapest property on the board, dismissed by everyone and considered almost useless.
No one thought much of it at the time… until he started building houses on the two brown properties.
What had seemed like an irrelevant move turned into a money-making machine. Little by little, Leonard began draining everyone's wallets until, against all odds, he won the game with the cheapest properties in play.
"Well… that was humiliating," Andrew admitted, leaning back in his chair as they gathered the bills and tokens.
"Yeah…" Haley said with a grimace. "I'm never underestimating the cheapest properties again."
The night had slipped by without them noticing, and the clock was already nearing one in the morning. Andrew got up, grabbed his keys, and drove Pippa home in the Camaro. The ride was short.
Afterward, Andrew returned to his aunt and uncle's house, where he would be staying the night. He had a plan for the morning: help Haley, Alex, and Luke prepare a surprise for Claire and Phil. It was their anniversary, and they wanted to bring them breakfast in bed.
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