Here, in the real world, I haven't talked to my exe for weeks.
It's strange how you can go from:
"I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
To just never talking again for the rest of your lives, you know?
Letting someone go can be one of the hardest things you have to do in life.
It -to me- feels like...like pretending that person is dead.
Like pretending they never existed in the first place.
It can hurt.
And hurt.
And hurt.
But one day it just wont anymore.
I am really looking forward to that day.
I will look back at this, all of this.
All of that.
And smile for what it was.
Laugh for the fool that I was.
For the memories made.
The stories.
The pros and the cons.
One day it will all be nothing but a series of events, and maybe just shards of that, as our memories tend to become.
Hmm.
I hope you all have been well.
I am so sorry that I didn't open with that.
I have been a bit off as of late.
I got this.
YOU got this.
WE got this.
Worry not, Folks.
Pain is temporary.
See you all soon, yeah?
Enjoy.
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August 12th, 2013.
Journal #072.
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I finished her poem today.
I wonder if she will cry when she reads it?
I don't really want her to cry, but I have a feeling that she will.
Maybe not in front of me, but she will.
I can feel it.
I miss her.
That's about it.
-----
-Hmm.
I remember writing that poem.
I posted it in "Shadows before dawn." I believe.
I'll post it here for anyone who doesn't want to go hunt it down, in the event that you care to read it.
...
... ...
... ... ...
-Hmm, again...
I can't seem to find it.
I think I have a copy somewhere in an old notebook or journal.
I will do my best to find it for you all. I could have sworn that I had added it to the S.D.B. collections, but I suppose not.
I just wasn't meant for me to relive at the moment, lol.
I'll take it.
-I've been doing much better in this healing journey of mine as of late, you know?
I think my last phase is a bit of bitterness and irritation, lbvs.
I have been feeling a bit...dark and heavy.
But I am good, I promise you.
I just need to finish this series, lol.
But I will be all good, even far before that point comes!
I always am.
And with you all here with me?
How else would I be?
I will leave you all at this point, and present you all with a more positive experience next time!
I love you all, and I hope that life has been treating you as good as it possibly can.
I will see you all back here soon enough.
Wherever THIS is!
Have a good weekend, Folks, and safe travels.
As always:
Stay safe.
Stay healthy.
Stay vigiant.
-Redd.