I'm Not A Master, I'm A Director
Chapter 437: Ritsuka: Am I in an Insane Asylum?
On the television screen, after a period of complete chaos and confusion, the three emotionally unstable individuals finally managed to calm down.
"So, to summarize: after arriving at Chaldea, you participated in a simulated battle exercise. Because you weren't accustomed to the half-dreamlike state caused by Rayshifting, you ended up falling asleep in the hallway."
Lev wiped the sweat from his temple. After understanding the full story, he lowered his head toward Ritsuka once again.
"My apologies again, Fujimaru-kun. Dragging you into all of this was our mistake. Unfortunately, you can't return home for the time being, so… please forgive us."
"Haha… if you put it that way, then please stop apologizing already."
Ritsuka could only respond with an awkward but polite laugh before asking the most important question of all.
"So… what exactly am I supposed to do now?"
Lev didn't answer immediately. Instead, he glanced down at the time.
"Perfect timing. The Director is about to hold a briefing session. Once you attend it, you should understand why you were brought to Chaldea."
Seeing that Ritsuka still looked completely lost, Mash stepped forward.
"Professor Lev, I'll bring Senpai there myself."
Lev nodded readily.
"Of course. If Fujimaru-kun falls asleep again, it'll become troublesome. What do you think, Fujimaru-kun? If you have no objections, we'll proceed with that arrangement."
As he spoke, Lev looked toward the still-dazed Ritsuka.
Ritsuka pondered for several seconds before slowly raising one finger.
"Can I ask something first?"
"Certainly."
"This girl…" Ritsuka pointed at Mash. "Why does she keep calling me Senpai?"
"Eh?!"
Mash's eyes widened so much her entire expression practically screamed:
That's the thing you're most concerned about?!
"Pfft—"
Seeing Sakura make such a genuinely shocked expression on screen, Shirou couldn't help laughing out loud.
Already furious from being irritated by her brother earlier, Sakura instantly turned toward him with a dark aura gathering around her.
"Senpai… what exactly is so funny?"
"S-Sorry, sorry!"
Shirou's survival instincts kicked in immediately as he hurried to apologize.
"I didn't mean anything bad by it! It's just… Sakura, you rarely make expressions like that when you're startled. It felt really fresh seeing it."
He scratched his cheek awkwardly.
"You're usually so composed all the time."
'Except when you're beating Shinji up in rage.'
Shirou quietly added that final part in his heart.
"Me?"
Sakura tapped her chin thoughtfully before replying uncertainly:
"But Mash's makeup and styling look pretty different from how I normally look without makeup, don't they?"
Shinji instantly cut in.
"Obviously it's because both you and Mash share the same secretly dark-hearted personality settings."
Sakura: "..."
Thirty seconds later—
"Let go of me!"
"Sakura, calm down!"
"Sakuracchi, how about using a hammer~⭐ If that's not enough, I can lend you a club too~⭐"
"Merlin, shut your damn mouth!"
◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆
The real-world Type-Moon company had descended into utter chaos, but Chaldea inside the movie wasn't doing much better.
Some things in the Type-Moon universe were simply unavoidable laws of causality.
For example, Rin Tohsaka's catastrophic luck with money.
Or Cu Chulainn's Schrödinger-like survival rate.
Or Lev's unbelievably cursed mouth.
While bringing Ritsuka to attend the Director's briefing, Lev worried the boy might literally fall asleep midway through the explanation, so he arranged for Mash to keep an eye on him.
Unfortunately, it was completely useless.
Even with Mash reminding him repeatedly, Ritsuka still managed to fall asleep while standing.
And, as if fate itself had it out for him, Director Olga Marie personally caught him in the act.
The result?
Ritsuka was immediately kicked out of the briefing room—with the left side of his face swollen bright red from being slapped.
"Are you alright, Senpai?" Mash asked worriedly.
"I got beat up pretty badly…"
With one cheek swollen, even Ritsuka's speech had become slurred.
Mash awkwardly scratched her cheek with a dry laugh.
"Well… no matter what, thanks to Director Olga, you're fully awake now."
"Yeah, but I also got kicked out at the same time!"
Ritsuka placed both hands behind his head and sighed helplessly.
"In the end, I still didn't learn anything."
"..."
Mash had no idea how to comfort him, so she forcefully changed the subject.
"Sorry for the wait. This is your room, Senpai."
"Thanks for bringing me here, Mash."
"Senpai, if you'd like, I can explain everything to you."
Probably because she genuinely couldn't stop worrying about the hopelessly absent-minded Ritsuka, Mash volunteered to take over the role of guide and narrator herself.
However, not wanting to trouble the girl any further, Ritsuka gently declined.
"It's okay. I'll just find someone else and ask later." He smiled kindly at her. "You still need to go back to the control room for the meeting, right? Don't worry about me. No point delaying important work."
Ritsuka's response completely caught Mash off guard.
She stared blankly at his face for several seconds before finally smiling softly.
"How could I?"
Then, with an unexpectedly cheerful tone, she added:
"As long as it's a request from Senpai… I'd gladly listen, even if it's just inviting me out to lunch."
["The level of treating someone to lunch"… what kind of level is that supposed to mean?]
As he waved goodbye to Mash, Ritsuka found the pink-haired girl even harder to figure out than before.
"Man… this really is one unbelievable place."
The moment Mash's figure disappeared around the corner of the hallway, Ritsuka immediately dropped the cheerful act and slumped into exhaustion.
"I seriously ended up somewhere insane. Is this so-called Chaldea some kind of secret organization or what…?"
"Fou!"
Fou, who had somehow decided to stick to Ritsuka like glue, smacked the door repeatedly with its tiny paws while turning back to cry at him impatiently, as if urging him to hurry up and open it already.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm opening it."
Ritsuka sighed. Although he had no idea why this weird little white creature had become attached to him, his body obediently took out the room card Mash had given him and unlocked the door anyway.
The moment the door opened, Ritsuka reflexively said:
"Excuse me for intruding—"
"—WAIT! DON'T COME IN!!"
A soul-shaking scream suddenly erupted from the kotatsu in the middle of the room.
"…A dumpling?"
"It's a human being!"
A young man with orange hair tied into a ponytail popped his head out from beneath a blanket wrapped around his body while hiding inside the kotatsu. Pointing dramatically at Ritsuka, he shouted:
"Who are you?! This is my personal slacking-off room, you know!"
"No, who the heck are you?!"
Ritsuka clearly remembered Mash specifically telling him nobody else was in his room.
"Hmph, who am I? Obviously a perfectly healthy doctor—cough cough cough!"
The man proudly slapped his chest, only to choke himself from using too much force.
"How is any part of you healthy…?"
Ritsuka helplessly rubbed his temples.
"What kind of cursed disaster day is this? Why are all the people I meet complete weirdos?"
The young man either didn't hear the complaint or chose to ignore it entirely. After calming down, he examined Ritsuka's clothes carefully before speaking again.
"So you're Fujimaru Ritsuka-kun, the final Master candidate."
"Yeah."
"Nice to meet you. I'm Romani Archaman, head of the medical department."
"Nice to meet you too…"
Ritsuka unconsciously shook the hand extended toward him.
[This guy actually seems pretty formal…]
"Everyone just calls me Dr. Roman. You can call me Roman-chan if you want~ Come on, don't just stand there. Sit down and have some tea."
[…Never mind. What kind of fluffy healing-series character is this guy supposed to be?!]
Looking at the utterly limp and spineless doctor, Ritsuka's favorable first impression shattered into pieces within a single second.
Thinking back on all the people he had met since arriving here—
A girl who called him Senpai despite never meeting him before (Mash).
A squinty-eyed man who treated him like a living Buddha statue (Lev).
A Director who slapped him without hesitation (Olga Marie).
And now this doctor who had somehow occupied his room while acting like the host.
"There's not a single normal person here. Did they throw me into a mental institution or something?"
Looking at Romani curled up inside the kotatsu, Ritsuka suddenly felt that his future had become incredibly bleak.
"…Am I ever getting back home?"
"Hahahaha~" ×N
Outside the screen, many viewers burst out laughing at Ritsuka's deadpan complaints. They also felt every newly introduced character so far was weird in their own unique way.
However, Aoko didn't laugh.
"This is kinda boring."
Resting her chin on one hand, Miss Aozaki coldly delivered her verdict.
"I think it's pretty good, though. Sure, the opening is a little mysterious, but the new characters are all really fun."
Compared to how she treated Fujita, Alice's attitude toward Aoko was noticeably gentler.
"But this doesn't even feel like a Shinji Matou movie at all!" Aoko loudly complained.
"There's no explosions, no fighting, no blinding special effects! It's just a bunch of characters standing around talking! Honestly, I'd rather watch three straight hours of Fou dancing by itself!"
"…You're right."
After being reminded by Aoko, even Alice finally realized just how unusually quiet the opening of Prologue had been.
"I think Sir Matou might be building up to something big?"
"I hope you're right. Otherwise it'll look like the movie skipped theatrical release to cut costs and is padding runtime with dialogue scenes." Aoko's voice dripped with impatience. Right now, she desperately wanted to see Servants fighting already.
"Aozaki-san, if this movie ends up flopping, wanna go flame Fuyuki City together?"
Fujita, who still hadn't gotten to see the Saber Alter teased in the trailer, was equally restless.
"Agreed! Let's do it together!"
Aoko and Fujita gripped each other's hands tightly.
At that very moment, the Anti-Shinji Alliance of Tokyo was officially born.
◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆
Ritsuka still had no idea how skilled Romani actually was as a doctor, but when it came to slacking off and enjoying life, he was absolutely convinced the man was a seasoned professional.
The tea Romani prepared was excellent, and the snacks served alongside it were surprisingly high-class too.
While sipping tea and eating sweets together, Ritsuka finally managed to learn the basic details about the research facility known as Chaldea.
"So it's located in a snowy mountain range six thousand meters above sea level…"
The moment he heard that, Ritsuka instantly gave up on any thoughts of secretly escaping.
[Even if I managed to get outside, I'd freeze to death immediately…]
What Ritsuka didn't know yet was that Chaldea wasn't merely located atop a six-thousand-meter snowy mountain—it was also situated in Antarctica, at the southernmost edge of the planet.
If he actually tried sneaking home by himself, he'd probably earn a Guinness World Record for Most Suicidal Human Being Alive.
Seeing Ritsuka's conflicted expression, Romani—already aware the boy had basically been kidnapped—asked sympathetically:
"Fujimaru-kun… you're feeling uneasy, aren't you? Being dragged to a place like this without understanding anything."
Ritsuka awkwardly scratched his hair.
"Yeah… a little uneasy. Mainly because everyone I've met so far has been kind of weird…"
"Hmm?"
Thinking of the pink-haired girl who kept smiling reassuringly at him, Ritsuka's lips unconsciously curled upward.
"But… everyone also seems like a good person."
Hearing that, Romani finally relaxed in relief.
"I see… that's good, then."
"Um, Doctor?"
Ritsuka leaned forward slightly.
"Why does a place like Chaldea need someone as ordinary as me?"
"That would be because—"
Before Romani could begin explaining Masters and Servants, his communicator suddenly rang.
"—Romani, Rayshift operations are about to begin soon. Just in case, could you come over here?"
Ritsuka recognized the voice on the other end immediately.
It was Professor Lev—the man who had guided him earlier.
"Huh? You need me there too?"
The instant he realized his peaceful slacking-off session was about to end, Romani's face became miserable.
"Just hurry and get over here already."
Lev's tone made it crystal clear this wasn't a request open for negotiation.
"It only takes two minutes to get from the medical office to the control room, right? Don't make me wait too long."
Then the call ended.
Romani looked like he was about to cry.
"Ugh… what about Fujimaru-kun? It takes five whole minutes to get there from here…"
"Doctor, please do your best."
Unfortunately, Ritsuka's encouragement did absolutely nothing to cheer him up.
Romani hurriedly began cleaning up the tea set on the kotatsu in a panic.
"This is bad, this is bad… I wonder if being a few minutes late will get me killed…"
Seeing Romani so flustered, Ritsuka quickly stood up to help.
"Doctor, I'll clean up here. You should hurry to the control room first."
However, before Romani could even say thank you, the lights in the room suddenly went out.
"A power outage? That shouldn't be possible—"
The instant Romani finished speaking, the entire room violently shook.
BOOOOOOM————!!
A deafening explosion erupted throughout the facility, startling both Ritsuka and Romani so badly they collapsed onto the floor.
The real show had finally begun.
"YEAH! THAT'S THE STUFF!"
In front of the television screen, Aoko pumped her fist excitedly into the air.
"Now this is the Shinji Matou I know!"
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Tn: I updated the story once every 2 days, but if you want to see more chapter of this story ahead of time, please go to my Patreon.
Latest Chapter: Chapter 476: Shirou: I'll Take Both[1]!
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[1] https://www.patreon.com/Thatsnakegirl/posts/im-not-master-im-165055398?collection=31097
[2] https://www.patreon.com/Thatsnakegirl/posts/im-not-master-im-165055398?collection=31097