Xavier's POV
Where do I even start? How do I explain the hell she left behind?
I could start with the sounds. The ones I spent every night eavesdropping on, praying my sister hadn't become the grenade that finally blew our family apart.
I could describe the scene I imagined in their bedroom that first night. The air so thick with silence you could choke on it.
"How long are you going to give me the silent treatment, Emily?"
Nothing from Mom. Just the sound of her scrubbing her face raw at the vanity. The AC was on full blast, but it did nothing to cut the heat of their anger.
"You can't keep ignoring me."
She finally stood, turning on him. "Why not? I'm doing a fantastic job so far."
"Honey…please."
She went to the bed, her eyes catching the family portrait on the nightstand. It seemed to mock her. For a second, I swear I felt her want to smash it. Instead, she just placed it face down. Gently. Which was worse.
Dad climbed in next to her, turning her face to his. "Talk to me. Just tell me what I can do."
I could tell her the parts I wish I could forget.
Like how Mom's gaze dropped to his lips. How her hand cupped his cheek, and she leaned in, her mouth barely grazing his. A ghost of a kiss.
Then she tried for a real one.
He held her back, his expression shocked. "What are you doing?"
"You said you wanted to help. So help me. Have sex with me."
She kissed him again. He groaned, a raw sound, and pushed her away. "I'm flattered, but I meant talk. We need to talk."
"Talk about how you let our child walk away? No. If you want sex, fantastic. Anything else? No. Good night."
She took a pillow and duvet and left. She slept in the guest room.
I could tell her about Beetle. How it broke our little sister.
How Mom showed up at her school, drunk off her ass. Beetle had to confiscate her keys and call Dad, her voice a tiny, terrified thing on the phone.
'Daddy? Can you come?…It's Mom. I think she's drunk…Please hurry.'
It took him forty-five minutes. He was vibrating with fury, but he smiled for Beetle. His face didn't change as he scooped Mom up and carried her to the car.
"Go back to class, baby," he said, his voice steady. A lie...our rock of a father wasn't steady.
In the car, Mom slurred, 'I'm so sorry.'
Was she? I mean she had to be. One doesn't go from supermom to flat out drunk in two weeks because her daughter ran off with a boy she hardly knew.
She had to be sorry!
But should I tell Miracle how Dad looked at her then? He always looks at Mom like she invented the sun. But in that moment, he saw a stranger.
'Did you drive here like this? It's a miracle you didn't kill yourself or someone else.'
'I'm sorry… I lost my child!'
'Yes, you did. But not the one you're thinking about.'
'What does that mean?'
'It means you lost Beetle today. And it's going to be a long time before you win her back. Xavier is worried sick. And I'm too busy worrying about you to worry about them properly.'
He carried her inside, straight to the shower, and turned the cold water on full blast.
I was so afraid. I thought he'd leave. Just walk out. But he surprised me. He stepped right into the spray, his suit and all, and started scrubbing the smeared makeup from her face.
She fought him. Of course she did. All the way through it all.
'This is your fault!' she spat.
He ignored her. 'Arms up. Let's get this off.'
'You're the reason I'm in this mess! You couldn't accept that she liked that boy and so you told her to leave'
'I didn't want her to leave. She was barely eighteen and he was twenty four. He's a fucking predator, Emily. It was a difficult decision but she wasn't my only kid. I had Beetle to think of. I didn't want that perv anywhere near her'
She started hitting him. Hard. Open-handed slaps to his chest, his face, shoving at him. He tried to block most of it, but she was persistent. Sober, she's strong. Drunk, she was a tornado.
'You need to stop. You're making it impossible to help you.'
'I don't need your help, Waylen! You've done enough!'
'Blaming me isn't fair. I did what was best for everyone.'
And then Mom said the thing. The words so horrible I bit my own lip until I tasted blood.
'I should have never let you into our lives.'
His voice went deathly quiet. 'You need to shut up. Now. Before you say something you can't take back.'
'You want to know what I regret?' she screamed, the water plastering her hair to her face. 'I regret ever meeting you.'