I flopped onto the sofa, covering myself with the worn history book I'd been fidgeting with. The book, a relic of a bygone era, held secrets and stories of a world ravaged by natural disasters. The once-blue skies were now a distant memory, replaced by the constant threat of sinking land and rising waters.
In the name of survival of the fittest, many lost their lives in search of more land. The scarcity of people due to the disasters and many in search of a place to live led to deaths. The toll has never been the same. To survive, even the enemies cooperated. A change that's hard to adjust to. Life was hard, as if facing the darkest time in history. A history that could have been better with more dead.
Human instincts are hard to be caged. They're meant to unravel, and so a sort of evolution took place, as right after getting a stable place, many demanded to get separated, a human hunch supposedly.
Although others claim it was closer to six years, the separation lasted eight long years. Ten districts arose during this period, each headed by a well-known family. A family that takes control by any means necessary. The kind of family that had the audacity to dominate.
A kind of result that was inevitable. It always has.
Rules were created to keep the districts stable. Like a marionettist, there are rules. They were enforced across all ten districts, deemed both necessary and justified by those in power.
So fixated rules, that a person or district will face harsh penalties if they are discovered to be violating any of them. Everything is obvious to the unaided eye, yet the punishment is not constrained by any religious legislation or advocate.
Humans have an innate desire to be in control, just as they want to be in control.
'The high rules control almost all districts.'
The first line encountered as I flipped the page over. Yeah, Yeah, I get it. Reading this book over and over would only make me queasy. Sigh! Reading Rules is the last thing to me yet it's the only thing left at this point. The bold font of the page is all the more threatening. I close the gruesome history book, as everything that needs to be known is something I am aware of.
The trite rules or so:
Rule 1: High rules must be followed by every single person in all districts.
Rule 2: Wars should be the last resort to every problem. [I still have a hard time understanding that.]
Rule 3: A ruler should treat all of his sons equally if he has two or more. The successor ought to be the most moral person. [The only approve-worthy]
Rule 4: Every man at the age of 20 must spend 2 months in the army. To know the harsh realities that were felt by the forefathers. [The forefathers probably don't even care at this point. Something I'm sure of]
Rule 5: Women shall remain within the vicinity of the freedom provided to them. [This rule may seem obsolete considering all the struggles that women went through to call themselves independent (they never were).] [A lot about this has been questioned, mainly by women themselves yet the status continues to stay the way it always has.]
Despite the creation of Districts 9 and 10, these five regulations were established from the start, when there were only eight districts.
However, a new law that exclusively targeted women was revealed in recent years, which raised concerns about women once more.
From not being allowed to attend the army tutorial to back to the time with them being regarded as providing childbearing facilities to fill in the alleged scarcity. A huge leap back in the past. I can see where the inspiration is coming from.
Now, there are six such rules, and no one dares to defy them.
There's a certain allure to being strong or at least pretending to be. Strong or acting strong has its charm. Right now, it's neither, as I've leveled to reckless. Why? Because I'm currently breaking one high rule and on my way to break another. That proud part of me is tinged with fear, uncertain of what the consequences will be.
I am Rose from the Nightingale family. The current ruler of District Ten. The district that is known to be ruled by my brother Rosen Nightingale.
As for the rest of the family, my mother died just a month after my birth. Father, consumed by grief, chose to blame me for her death. He never got my name registered in the family tree, effectively erasing my existence. A part of me chose to accept this reality while my inner child preferred to stay saddened by the lack of affection; however, things just dawned on me how much I would have lost as the one supposedly in rule. My presence is known to only a few: my brother, Aunt May, who raised me; Uncle Joe, my father's loyal subordinate who has guided me; and Rachel, a maid who has become more of a family member.
My brother and I are almost the same in appearance. His dimples and the jagged birthmark on my forehead are the only things that are distinct. The mark has never affected me, but it gives the right side of my forehead an odd appearance like it has been repeatedly smacked. In addition, we both have dark brown hair that might be mistaken for black and pale skin. Black! A shade I tend to keep in that beating pile of meat. A corrosive part that keeps my obsession tightly locked away. To me, he is everything. He's the brother who has fought for me, the brother who has bled for me, and the brother who needs me.
There are things we do without hesitation, without needing to understand or to be patient. For him, I would do anything.
Blessing the sofa with my body as I switch through random channels only to be reminded of him again. A bit of head tilt and Aunt comes into view which I'd say was unexpected. She's seldom seen by me these days.
"Hey! Um Brother had his medicines right?" Well, this always stops her!
A Casual everyday question in this household. Is she struggling to respond or am I thinking too much yet again? As her hands tighten on each side of the sofa on top of me. I'm not second-guessing anymore.
I guess not. I just did guess.
That's not the face of someone who struggles to come up with words like yes or no. Now all that is left is to wait for her to spill.
"No, but I tried. He's continuously refusing." A dejected tone made its way as she turned around to leave while holding the pills in her hands. Hey! Im not done yet.
"What do you mean by no? Why are you still unable to give him those damn pills?"
Im not screaming. Don't get the wrong idea.
Now what's with that expression? she's looking at me with an offended look. What? Did I say something wrong?
"What do you want me to do? Force him." A mediocre yet daunting voice made its way towards me.
Sigh. At the end of the day, it's always me who has to lay herself down. The ruler of nothing in this house.
"Look I'm sorry. OK. Now give those to me."
I took the medicines from her hands and went straight to his room. As there was nothing left to be relayed among us anymore.
Walking up the stairs had me feeling how I wanted these stairs to be like a spiral staircase. Why did I not do it when I could? Gotta keep this idea for later as I reached for his room.
Knocks.
Knocking once got me no answer.
Knocked twice.
"Bro, can I come in?"
Soon afterwards a weak but familiar voice with a slight grumble was heard. "No, you may not."
Like that's my signal to barge in and get the flimsy side of him in view. But it is easy for such thoughts to be carried away by entering that room of his and getting sight of him sitting on the bed covered with IV tubes, a pale complexion but as always holding a huge smile in place that unknowingly brings tears to my dried eyes.
I calm myself so as not to worry him while he smiles to not worry me. We both didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
"You're crying again. I am feeling better, actually better than better." He's hard to understand and cheat with. The Rosen I know has always known what I'm thinking.
He's a magician, a brother who knows her sister a bit too well. This is what love is or being loved feels like. And I, the conscious one…wouldn't let things budge. "Come on. You always say that. I don't trust you so let me check." His feeble hand is now in my clasuled small hands checking the only thing I'm good at, pulse check. Seems normal. This is like music to my ears as he moves from better to betterment. Unlike the past where just having a small amount of pulse was enough to make me breathe.
He shifts in his bed as he tries to get closer to where I'm seated on his right ."I'm going to be 20 soon. What are you going to give me this year?" I can doubt him. Is he trying to be an alarm clock for me?
I know exactly why he is continuously reminding me of him turning 20. I'm not the type to drag so let's just have this conversation while we are at it.
"Quit beating about the bush. I know what you're implying."
I know not going will be bad for us, our district. As many are already keeping one eye at bay for us. They'll find out about us eventually but before any of that happens it's best for brother to regain his lost health and take over as the ruler he should be. Till then just thinking of getting caught gives me creeps.
"Bro, I know you think about it a lot and no wonder you're losing weight." Weight was never stable in the first place. "I have already thought of a way." I hope this sentence goes clouded with confidence as I had planned before.
This did indeed bring a spark in his eyes according to plan. His frail body can only take so much is what my mind lets me on. For now lets keep things at a secrecy level.
"Really. Tell me." he asked as if expecting a direct answer. I'm not good with conversing at this pace, something sliced up.
I gotta make myself clear once I feel he can take it."I will but you have to understand the situation first."
I know he is going to turn 20 just after a few days and right after one month that stupid tutorial will start. And it is something that must be attended. That is what scares me. But my resolution is intact.
Brother, no matter what neither are you going nor am I going to let anyone find out. That's something I can assure you with.
"Go ahead. Tell me." He holds my hand as if to get me to state my ingenious plan. His eye balls could be seen quivering with happiness? Fear?
"Nope. What's the hurry? Not telling won't hurt."
"I am your older brother Rose!" There goes him. Using an elderly card on me.
With a mischievous grin, it could be called me having half- stupid looking upturned lips, on my face I continued as to not let this interaction of ours go to waste.
"There isn't much of a difference. Only 2 yrs that hardly matter to me." I may not be a liar but this is something that matters alot to me. I respect him, adore him, care for him like any sister would do. So all of it, everything matters to me. But right now everything's gonna get spilled as that one abnoxious stare of his has now been received.
"Quit giving me that glare."
The need to explain in one go is feral, then all will be less problematic for me.
"Bro, listen carefully. You should understand that you are in no condition to go there as you can't even walk properly yet and I seriously don't have the guts to send you there. If we don't attend it then they would do anything to get us removed after knowing the immediate condition of ours. You know district one well enough to know yourself. We'll lose our district. They'll find out about us. They'll find out that District Ten is lnnt ruled by the Rosen they always thought." A deep intake of breath was what I was lacking after rapping with no clear end in sight.
I stared, more like gaped at him. But his expression was all like, 'I'll beat you into a pulp if you don't continue'
What I'd assume 'go ahead, I'll hear what you have to say after that we'll see'
I sat straight once again and continued that script that I had written for this occasion.
'Um, so. This will bring chaos over me and I won't be able to look after you. All will be ruined."
Which is why I can't let anything happen that'll give us away not until you take hold of the district yourself. For me and for everyone to see. It's possible in just weeks but this damn tutorial is like a glitch in-between our smooth sailing. A month is all that I need to help him up on his feet. And then I'll just be there for him as I'll always be and always have.
The temperature seemed to suddenly drop, as if the room was never warm in the first place. My eyes had trouble adjusting as I tried to look at his face and so I backed down, unable to guess what's going to come. A minute or two has passed with no exchange of words that now makes things all the more stressful. Silence is not good. Not good at all when you have practically given every thought to what to need to hear. A bad omen.
Maybe a cough might help. As the major part is what I kept to myself.
*cough*
"This is why I think I should go there." The words are finally out. It feels ok to be sharing at this point.
"ARE YOU INSANE?"
Some deadly shrill-coded words made their way. NO. He screamed at me.
At me. He dared…oh yes he can but at me? He could never…was i expecting something else?
This is my first time as I could feel my eyeballs popping out with nothing to say for a moment. I know deep down I'm not wrong to think of such a thing when everyone knows the result of getting caught there. I am scared. But being scared won't get me anything or anywhere. It never did. Not then and even now.
"Look, I am already breaking a high so why not one more." A direct approach is the best one in this regard. I want to calm this sudden atmosphere but looks like I'd have to get myself accustomed to this surrounding.
"Rose, you are my younger sister. I promised dad that I would take care of you no matter the outcome. I am the one who should be talking about all these things, not you. It is I, who is to take care of you, not the other way around. Technically babysitting me."
It's bad.
For making him feel like this but what can I do. I know this possibly is the most dangerous way but it seems to be the most effective one at the same time. I cannot let even the tiniest things go unnoticed at this point.
This is a risk but it is the only one I can take.
"I know this is an insane idea but this is the best we can manage." It literally is the only option if you see it from my perspective. When it is said that their is no option then there is none. I've already looked upon other ways but the risk is no where near the desired calculation.
"Brother nobody has seen you since you were 10 as for me nobody even knows that I exist. I don't have an Identity."
Stating facts is all that's left at this point. The need for him to know how this plan has more the chances of succession then any of what he's probably thinking. I get as close as I can to diminish the distance between us. So much so that the height of our eyes linger on to each other densely.
"The plan is that I'm going to disguise myself and be you. It is not much of a hassle. I just need to cut my hair. I am quite well-trained in protecting." Everything is now displayed. Everything that he needs to know. No more no less.
Is it this ego that I read about? "As nobody has seen me so why not someone else. A boy rather than a girl. Just someone else." He inquired with a solemn expression. It is clear that he's trying to find alternatives which I've pretty much considered with some deep thought on my own.
"In that way, we are most likely to get caught. Well, there are tons of things that could be asked so this plan is most likely to fail. I am the only one with knowledge at this point. Not to mention the fact we lack young people, the ratio here is not normal."
I added, " If I knew that you are close to getting the health you deserve then I should have thought of this plan. Prepare a guy just for this occasion."
(I still would not have)
"It's a lost cause now and I take full responsibility for not making a good decision."
As a ruler, the best I can do is to accept this. Deep down I know things won't be as normal as they seem. If by chance any such trivialities were welcomed by me then It would be a slow death. Not knowing is better than having half information. But I'd rather know everything there is to be known. So sending someone else was off the radar a long time ago.
"Rose, what If your disguise failed."
Disguise fails of a disguise master. Not possible. The urge to stop my hands from going under my hair to flip was deep.
He is unable to hide the fear in his tone. The more he feels like this, the more eludes the urge to just do it. Simply waiting won't get us nowhere. I'd rather go by the path I chose.
Or more that choice was never an option in the first place for me. It never had and never will.
"Brother you are the only family I have left. The doctors are saying you're getting better. If you go there you might-might." Die. I can't say this. I looked up at him straight into his eyes once more. He had tears. The kind of look that breaks me.
"It's a sort of physical training probably and you are nowhere accustomed to that. Nobody I tell you would be of help there". He needs to see that he'd be alone with no one to understand his situation.
"What kind of brother am I? A kind who can't even do this for his little sister." The heavy voice amalgamated with sorrow is something I can not sink in with. It's a responsibility, a duty to cut the emotions before they sprout.
"Don't worry. Just remember that I will come back and district 10 will belong to you and you only."
"what am I supposed to do with this district if something happened to you?"
"I'll be fine. I promise." I will be fine as long as you are here alive and breathing for this district of ours. I will be ok. I should be.
Sitting close to him incited a sudden urge to hug him tightly. Tight enough to ease his tensions but I know the only thing I might end up bringing would be pain. Loving one beyond human comprehension always proves fatal. But that should not be a concern for me. I love him even more so he can imagine.
I stand up to make him know it's his rest time and for him to know that the discussion is done. No more of this shall be talked upon until when necessary. This is gonna remain like a void inside till it's not known.
I am able to gave him his pills. Which would surely help him calm down and provide a good sleep altogether. A commodity known to us both.
A sleep he's deprived of as far as I can recall. For now he's at the mercy of swallowing things to gain what he lost. It's more of a tragedy when you know you've done well and would continue to do so only to realise that the person you were supposed to be was killed mercilessly without much reason to support.
I stayed till I was sure his eyes would no longer stay alert and will slowly scumb to a rest he's deprived. He soon slept. I place a kiss on his peeking visible forehead that hardly shows itself under those long shoulder-length hair of his. I tucked him in and quietly left him to sleep that he needed.
.
.
.
The order I had placed finally arrived. Quite the patience it sprinkled on me. The package is placed on my bed, in my plain yet clean room. A room that Aunt never would approve of.
It's just clothes. Plain robust clothes that need me in the same manner I have a need for them. Got them out of the package and started placing them in the wardrobe. A place that hardly needs changes. The light barely seemed to reach my room being at a certain corner of this big house, not sidelined but yeah thats what I was told it'll feel if I tried to take a room closer to brother.
How do these fold? Huh. I really hate doing household work like this. It's not like I was given much of a princess treatment to begin with. But a girl can dream. A girl who hates it even though I'm doing it for myself. Somethings are a must.
All the ordered clothes were men's wear. I need to get accustomed to them in order to feel comfortable. It's not that I don't wear baggy clothes…a girl's clothing is feminine no matter how one looks. Gotta look more macho, showing off my slightly more than average height. These are gonna make an appearance in that tutorial. Gotta look expensive in the least.
I went out of my room and met 'junior'. So, Junior is our cat, well not a cat to be more elaborative. Actually a panther.
A black panther. A black beauty is what he is. Him under his hard looks is just a small cat no matter how one perceives it to be, well cat is always a cat. The only aspect noticeable is its size. A full grown male panther. A one forty pound giant is always up for crushing me. He has been with us for almost if I recall correctly five years. A prime. So, yes it's part of our small family.
"Baby! you had breakfast?"
I could feel him vandalizing my legs as if to say no, at least that's what I always assume."Moan."
"I guess not". My poor baby needs nutrition. How will he ever chew on bastards at this rate!
I called Rachel to take him away and to feed. As for me, I need to think and the best place to think freely is my greenhouse.
.
"What do you think about District Ten?" A lazy yet sinister voice is heard. The breathy tone, down to those shiny shoes, a piece of plumpy meat sits on a sofa waiting for an answer. A demand that needs execution.
A servant but most likely a lowy minister standing in front of him, holding a file full of every district's values. Something that no one should be capable enough to uphold before the official announcements every year.
"Master, these past years they have established themselves quite alot. It looks like the son is more efficient in ruling than the father and the most surprising thing is that they don't even have enough manpower yet still are economically strong." spoke as he broke a sweat.
"Father this coming month, That Nightingale will also be there" Spoke Kyson, the delusional next-in-line of District 1 and the second son of Gabriel Hawk.
"Ump! It's time to see what kind of person he is. That young insolent brat." Gabriel Hawk, the ruler of District One spoke as the One with a docile roar, stating his position.
"Do not worry father our district will always remain no.1." said Kyson, The next in line to get a hold of his father's wishes and district.