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Chapter 13 - Chapter Thirteen: This Little Light of Mine

Melina hugged her daughter Nat as she fought hard to keep her tears at bay. "Do you really have to leave?" She loved having her family back home, especially now that she had a granddaughter to spoil. 

"We will be back before you know it. Besides you and dad still have to come to Y/n's first birthday party in a few months." Nat said as she hugged her mom. She had never seen her adopted mother look so sad to see her go. It was a strange feeling, but one that she could get used to. 

Alexei was taking it a lot harder than Melina as he didn't want to let you go. He was currently holding you and giving you kisses on your rosy pink cheeks. His long beard was tickling your face which caused you to erupt into a fit of sweet giggles. "Don't you forget your Dedu and Babu." He said to you as he chuckled softly when you wrapped your little hand around his pinky finger. 

"Dad, it's going to be okay. Believe me Y/n isn't going to forget you or mom. Look, her birthday is in two months and you can come stay with us and help us set up her party. Now, can I please have my baby?" Nat asked in a playful tone as she motioned for her dad to hand you over to her. 

Alexei sighed sadly as he hugged you before handing you over to your mama. "I'll see you soon, malen'kiy." He then turned to Yelena and Kate who were saying goodbye to his wife. "So when will my youngest daughter have children?" 

Melina's jaw dropped as she gave her husband the scary "shut your mouth" look. "Alexei!" 

"What? I'm Dedu now and I want more grandbabies to spoil." He said as he shrugged his shoulders. 

Nat and Wanda couldn't help but giggle as they watched Kate and Yelena's faces turn beet red. They found it adorable that both Melina and Alexei had slipped into their grandparent roles so easily. 

Kate was the first to speak as she had finally found her voice. "Yelena and I actually have an announcement to make." The brunette felt like her heart was going to beat out of her chest from nervousness. Some of her anxiety slipped away when she felt Yelena squeeze her hand reassuringly. "Yelena proposed to me last night and we're getting married! We also are looking into fostering. After the incident with Y/n we realized that we do want to have children but we have a lot to learn before we adopt." 

It took a few awkward minutes for everyone to process what Kate had announced. Once everyone processed the wonderful news the room filled with love and congratulations. Yelena and Kate were squished in between Alexei, Melina, Wanda and Natasha who was still holding you. 

You got lots of hugs and kisses when you clapped your hands excitedly even though you didn't understand why everyone around you was so happy. 

Once everyone settled Melina looked over at Kate, "wait. What incident with y/n were you talking about?" 

Yelena's face turned white as she locked eyes with her mom who had the, "what did you do to my grandbaby?" face. 

Nat came to the rescue as she placed you in your Babu's arms. "Nothing to worry about now. I think Y/n wants to give her Babu a kiss goodbye." 

You placed a slobbery wet kiss to your Babu's cheek as she hugged you tightly. 

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The drive back home went smoother than expected as you had slept most of the way home. The rest of the time that you were awake you spent watching baby educational videos that your auntie Kate put on her phone for you. 

Wanda sat in the backseat with you and Kate, as Natasha had insisted that her and Yelena could take turns driving home. 

Natasha smiled when she turned to look in the backseat and found that you, Kate and Wanda had all drifted to sleep. Honestly it was a miracle for anyone to be able to sleep while Yelena was driving. 

"So you and Kate are ready to tie the knot?" Nat asked as she made small talk with her sister. She was happy that Yelena had found an amazing woman who loved and cared for her. 

Yelena's cheeks blushed slightly as she nodded her head, "we are. I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. She's amazing in every single way… I just hope that I can be just as amazing for her." The blonde bit her lip nervously as she gripped the steering wheel. 

"You're both made for each other. You will be a great wife and mother, sestra." Nat said as she placed her hand reassuringly on her sister's shoulder. 

Yelena nodded her head, "I hope so. The last thing I want is for my trauma to seep into those that I love. I'm scared that my childhood trauma is going to affect me as a wife and mother one day." She paused as she focused on driving. She was thankful that there weren't many people out on the roads this late at night. "I mean… I forgive mom and dad, but what happened to us was… abuse. What if I ever hurt Kate or our children? Sometimes I have nightmares that I'm still a mind controlled assassin." Tears fell down the blonde's face as she felt her lips tremble. 

Nat felt her heart break for her sister as she also shared the same thoughts and fears as her little sister. "Yelena. I'm sorry. I wish I could go back in time and rescue you from the Red Room. I should've gone back for you." Natasha dug her nails painfully into her thighs as she felt her own tears fall down her cheeks before letting out a sigh. "I can't change the past. We both can't. But one thing that Wanda and Y/n have shown me is that I have the power to choose my present. We've both had so much taken from us, let's not let Dreykov take our future away from us too. All we can do now is learn how to heal, and hold the ones we love close. I love you, sestra." 

Both sisters cried silently as they held each other's hands in understanding. "I love you too, sestra." Yelena said in a quiet whisper. 

Wanda smiled to herself as she had woken up in the middle of their conversation. She was thankful that Nat and Yelena were knocking down the walls of their childhood trauma and getting closure. 

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Wanda carried you into your nursery as you had just finished breastfeeding. She laid you on the changing table and changed your diaper. "Y/n, I love you so much sweet girl. You are bringing so much healing and love to this family. I don't think I've ever seen your mama and her family so happy before. We are so lucky that you are our little tiger." She said as she rocked you in her arms. 

Natasha walked into the nursery and wrapped her arms around Wanda's waist from behind. She loved watching Wanda be so loving and nurturing to you. "Thank you for loving me and Y/n." 

"I'll always love you and Y/n." Wanda said as she gently lowered you into your crib before turning and facing her girlfriend. "You both complete me… Nat there's something I need to tell you… it's about my past." 

"Whatever it is Wanda. I promise I'm not going anywhere. Come let's go talk in the living room, I'll make us some tea." Nat said as she held her girlfriend's hand and led her out of the nursery. 

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Wanda sat on the couch crisscrossed as she sipped her tea carefully. She felt nervous to finally reveal her own trauma to the love of her life. 

"I've always wanted to be a mother and there was a time in my life where I went to great lengths to have that possibility. After I lost Vision my heart felt dark and empty. We had talked about getting married, buying a house and having children. We dreamed of having twins… twin boys; but as you know Vision died before we could make our dreams come true." Wanda took a shaky breath as she sat her mug of tea on the coffee table. She didn't want to spill it due to her hands shaking. 

"When Vision died I went to the town where we were supposed to build our life. I used my chaos magic and I created a fake version of the life that I had wanted. I created a fake reality where I was married to Vision, became pregnant and gave birth to two beautiful baby boys. Billy and Tommy had become my whole world and I loved them with every fiber of my being. The thing was that they weren't actually real. I'm not ready to talk about how I lost them and the fake world that I had created; but what I need you to know is that I've done horrible things too, Nat. I'm scared just like you. I'm scared that if something happens to you and Y/n that I'm going to turn into the darker version of myself… when y/n almost died… I felt it. I felt my darker side." 

Natasha could tell that Wanda had been wrestling with your near death experience. To be honest everyone that almost lost their Little became even more protective of their babies. Since the incident Wanda hadn't taken on any missions. "Wanda you're not a monster. If anything ever happened to you or y/n, I would turn into the assassin that Dreykov raised me to be." She said as she moved closer to her girlfriend and took her shaking hands into her own. 

The stress and exhaustion hit Wanda like a ton of bricks as her shoulders relaxed. Her head hung low as she began to sob. She cried for the life that she had lost and she cried over watching you almost die. She knew that as an Avenger that it was her job to protect everyone, but she didn't want to lose you or Natasha in order to save the world. She would always go above and beyond to protect those that she loved. 

Nat instantly pulled Wanda into her lap and embraced her. She felt her own tears fall down her face. She hated seeing the woman she loved break apart; but this is what healing looked like. This is what facing your fears and doubts looked like. Darkness grows in isolation. She knew that better than anyone. "Let it out, moya lyubov'. I'm right here. You're safe, we are all safe and we are home." 

Both women held each other as they let their walls continue to fall. They opened up and talked about their fears, their broken and fractured memories, and they shed light onto their dark pasts. They both had done horrific things that they weren't proud of, but opening up about those things and being gentle with themselves was what they both needed. It would be a learning curve for them to fully heal from their pasts, but they weren't alone anymore. Their little tiger was shedding light, love, and healing onto all that was dark. 

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