Seven Sins System Chapter 461. Growth
It was a good meal, all things considered. The casserole Julia had brought was warm and comforting. But even as I ate, I knew that the turmoil inside me wouldn't be easily silenced. This was new territory for me, a situation unlike anything I had faced before—a relationship that involved the heart and all its messy, unpredictable emotions.
In the past, relationships had always been simple for me. My criteria were straightforward.
Did the woman suit my taste?
Did she agree with how possessive I was, with my status, and with the fact that I wouldn't share her with anyone?
If she accepted those terms, I would take her as mine, regardless of her status or whether she brought any benefits to the table. It was as simple as that. Even with my first succubus, Ravenna, it hadn't been as complicated as this.
But with Puriel, everything was different. There were layers upon the complexity that I couldn't easily untangle. Our past, those countless battles, the thread of fate that bound us, the conflicting emotions that neither of us wanted to acknowledge—it was all a tangled web that I wasn't sure how to navigate. And it frustrated me to no end.
The dinner wound down. The silence between Julia and me grew heavier. I could tell she wanted to say more, to offer some kind of solace or advice, but she held back, perhaps sensing that I needed time to process everything on my own. I appreciated her restraint.
I pushed my empty plate aside and leaned back in my chair, letting out a long breath. "Thanks for the meal, Julia," I said, my voice a little softer than before. "It was... exactly what I needed."
Julia smiled, a warm smile that reached her eyes. "I'm glad you liked it. I thought you could use something homemade." She paused, her gaze searching mine for a moment. "I know you're dealing with a lot right now. But you don't have to go through it alone. You know that, right?"
I nodded, though I wasn't sure how much comfort I could take from her words. "I know. And I appreciate it. But this... this is something I have to figure out on my own. It's not like any of the other challenges I've faced. It's... different."
She tilted her head slightly, her expression thoughtful. "Different isn't always bad, you know. It might be uncomfortable, even painful, but it can also lead to growth. You've been through a lot. Maybe this is just another part of that journey."
I looked away, her words striking a chord that I wasn't ready to acknowledge.
Growth.
The idea that this turmoil, this chaos, could be a part of my evolution as a being—a devil, no less—was unsettling. I had always prided myself on my strength, my ability to control and manipulate my environment to my advantage. But now, with Puriel, I felt out of control, vulnerable in a way that I hadn't been since Ravenna.
"I don't know if I want to grow in this way," I muttered, more to myself than to Julia. The idea of changing, of becoming something different because of these feelings, was terrifying. It was easier to remain the same, to cling to the familiar roles of power and dominance that had defined me for so long.
Julia stood up, taking our plates and stacking them neatly. "Sometimes, we don't get to choose how we grow," she said, her tone gentle but firm. "Life, or fate, or whatever you want to call it, pushes us in directions we never expected. All we can do is decide how we're going to respond to that push."
She moved around the room, cleaning up without waiting for me to offer help. Her words lingered in my head, to where my doubts and fears festered. I knew she was right. Julia had a way of cutting through the noise in my head, of finding the truth that I was too stubborn or too scared to face. She was right about growth, about how I don't always get to choose how I'm pushed to evolve.
I leaned back in my chair, the tension in my body slowly unwinding, though my mind was still a tangled mess. "Do you think it's possible?" I asked after a long pause. "For me and her? To... to find some kind of middle ground?"
Julia stopped what she was doing and looked at me, her expression thoughtful. "I think anything is possible," she said slowly, choosing her words with care. "But it depends on what you both want. If you both want to find that middle ground, if you're both willing to put in the work and face the challenges, then yes, I think it's possible," Julia said, her tone measured and hopeful.
I let her words sink in, but deep down, I doubted that we could ever do that "face the challenges" she spoke of. The obstacles between Puriel and me seemed insurmountable, and the idea of working through them felt more like a cruel joke than a realistic possibility. The skepticism bubbled up inside me, and I decided to hide it behind a forced smile.
"It will need a miracle for that," I said, my voice filled with a dry, self-deprecating humor. I didn't believe in miracles, not for someone like me.
Julia, however, simply smiled back and continued her work, her eyes soft but knowing. She didn't press the issue, perhaps realizing that convincing me wouldn't be easy, or maybe she sensed that I wasn't ready to be convinced.
For a moment, there was only silence between us. "I'll get out of your hair," she said, her voice gentle. "I know you've got a lot on your mind, and you probably need some time to yourself."
I nodded, grateful for the space she was offering me. "Thanks, Julia. For the food... and for listening."
She gave me a warm smile. "Anytime. You know where to find me if you need to talk."
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