All of these little advantages, coupled with the fact that she was stationed at the back of the army, were why she was able to escape that devastating attack.
If given a choice, she doesn't want to experience that again. If her opinion counted, she would have made everyone retreat now.
But her opinion doesn't count, and the church is not yet willing to give up. So she has to show up for duty and hope that it won't be her last time to do so.
Many people in the camp were like her. They were realistic people who felt fear for their lives.
It was a normal reaction for them to be afraid after witnessing people being burned alive without any resistance. It was even more reasonable to want to quit while they can after barely surviving the process of being burned alive.
But despite how normal and reasonable this reaction was, the people who felt it were in the minority in the camp. There were more people still willing to fight after witnessing the horror of a legendary noble.
