You know that feeling you got when you prepared your first meal or when you finally rode a bicycle without assistance or when you made your first friend, that gentle feeling of pride and self appraisal that made you so happy you want to make that food again and ride that bike longer? That's exactly how I feel right now after finishing up the book Jana gave me at the library yesterday.
I've never read a book in less than twenty four hours, no matter the size but it's just sunset and I'm done. It's very informing and enlightening but it's basically a more detailed explanation form of the history Sean told me summarily.
There are other added points he left out like the goddess being twenty five when she created this kingdom and lived for approximately two thousand years. She never married nor conceived, she never fell in love either.
There has been four tenors in this kingdom so far and I'm guessing Sean's to be the fifth, although there isn't any detailed information about the rulers aside their names. One strange thing I noticed is the last ruler recorded in the book bears a male name, Xavier and I'm pretty sure Sean's mom is the last ruler before Sean. She can't possibly be Xavier and if she isn't, why is her name omitted? Quickly, I skim through and find the page where their names are listed accordingly:
King Ian and Queen Imelda.
King Elliot and Queen Charlotte.
King Lucius and Queen Esmeralda.
King Xavier.
That's it. Just King Xavier. Didn't he have a queen of his and where's Sean's mother? I need to find the answer and I would ask Sean but I haven't set eyes on him today. Like before, I woke up to see he left breakfast for me and hours later, lunch appeared with a small note that reads *I miss you*. I hope he shows up soon but I have a really bad feeling about something, I just can't place it.
Sighing, I keep the book gently on the table and lay on the bed in wait for Sean while letting my mind think of possible ideas why his mother's name was not recorded.
Hours pass by, the sun disappears, the moon takes it as it's cue to shine and I find myself dozing for the fiftieth time, slowly growing impatient to wait and seriously considering giving in to the sleep. It's funny how my nightmares don't scare me anymore, they're there and they affect the peacefulness of my slumber but I've grown to accept it. I no longer fight off my demons, embracing them seems easier.
The bed shifts a little beside me and the all too familiar scent of lavender and citrus fills my nostrils and relaxes my muscles, my entire system calming down as he wraps his arms around me in his usual manner.
"I missed you." Sean says into my hair and his usual minty breath mixes with his scent giving it the spice I so much like.
"I know." I respond with my voice low and he holds me even tighter.
"I'm going to miss you." He sighs and I frown a little.
"What do you mean?" I ask allowing my confusion into my voice since he can't see my face.
"They're really close." He says and I immediately know he's talking about the war, "We have to set out by dawn so they don't get any more nearer."
"But," I say trying not to panic as I sit up quickly to look at his face but his features blend in with the dark and I can only see his outline. "So soon? How close are they? How tough of a war would this be? What am I supposed to do when you leave? I can't cope if-"
"Shhh." He cuts me off and pulls me back down on the bed, "everything will be fine. Don't move. Stay this way."
Sighing, I close my eyes and try to relax, repeating his words till I'm convinced a little. Everything will be fine.
"You'll have Zara guide you." He says after a few seconds, "and I'll be back before you know it."
"Promise me." I say already scared of losing him. These people would kill me if anything happens to him and I've come to grow really fond of him. I can't lose another dear one.
"I promise to come back to you," he kisses the back of my head, "my queen."
My heart swells at the promise and my stomach flutters at the name but I stay quiet as we both enjoy the peaceful silence. I know he's going to come back, he would never back out on his promise.
"Crystal?" He says my name after few minutes, breaking the comfortable quiet.
"Yeah?"
"Be careful." He says and although concern overfills his voice, I can sense his fear, "I know you don't want to rely on anyone but that's the only way to survive here. Rely on Zara. Don't go anywhere alone, eat with her if you must but be extra vigilant. Trust no one. I mean no one."
"Sean?" I call out to him too, "be careful. I know you are king and don't want to rely on anyone but that's the only way to survive the war. Rely on your men but be extra vigilant. Don't fight alone and trust no one. I mean no one."
He holds me even closer to himself if that's possible and we lay quiet, the soft ticking of the small table clock serving as the only sound. After a few minutes, sleep starts to take me away from the sad reality of Sean leaving for war as my heart cries for the night to be long and for dawn to take days.