Help! I’m the Holy Son With a Demonic Bloodline!
I died while rage-pulling in a mobile gacha game.
One moment I was yelling,
“JUST GIVE ME THE FIVE-STAR WAIFU, YOU GREEDY PIXEL PIMP!”
And the next—
my phone exploded with the power of ten thousand failed pulls.
Darkness.
Silence.
Regret.
When I opened my eyes again…
I was not in Heaven.
Not in Hell.
I was in Peak Plot Armor Territory—
the Sacred Heaven Sect, the number-one righteous sect known for two things:
— Crushing demons
— Crushing people they think look like demons
(very important distinction)
Also, I had somehow become their Holy Son.
Yes—that Holy Son.
The one so handsome the flowers bloom.
The one so elegant the heavens weep.
The one so arrogant he has his own personal lightning strike counter.
Great!
Except—
This particular Holy Son is also famous for being:
— A tutorial boss with too much eyeliner
— Rude to everyone
— A plot device
— And extremely good at dying
(usually in public, usually loudly)
I was basically a handsome piñata for the protagonist to beat up.
But before I could say “return policy,”
a cold mechanical voice echoed inside my mind:
[Luck Plundering System Online]
Newbie Gift Pack: SUPER ILLEGAL DEMONIC BLOODLINE — ‘Abyssal Monarch Physique’
Translation:
“Congratulations! You are now a walking death sentence in a righteous sect. Good luck not getting executed!”
I checked the sect rules.
Rule #1: No demons.
Rule #2: Seriously, no demons.
Rule #3: If you think you might be a demon, please report yourself so we can kill you politely.
Wonderful.
Now I, the Holy Son beloved by thousands of female disciples, was secretly a demon lord starter pack with a system whose main function is:
[STEAL LUCK]
AKA
“rob everyone blind and become the reason Heaven files a complaint.”
So what do I do?
Oh, you know:
Steal opportunities,
Hijack destiny,
Third-party loot everything,
Bulldoze plot armor,
And—
ahem
collect female leads like Pokémon cards.
Protagonist blessed by the heavens?
Sorry, bro.
Your luck is now my pocket change.
Righteous elders?
Fuel for my stats.
Beautiful fairies, saintesses, fox spirits, sword maidens?
I will save them.
I will protect them.
I will absolutely not let them join the protagonist’s harem.
In this cultivation world, luck decides everything.
So I’ll just take everyone’s.
After all—
I am the Holy Son they bow to…
and the Demon King they’d definitely murder if they found out.
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» DISCLAIMER BEFORE YOU ENTER THE CHAOTIC CULTIVATION UNIVERSE «
This novel contains:
• A system that steals luck harder than my ex stole peace
• A Holy Son who is holy in title and demonic everywhere else
• Senior sisters who are one flirt away from forming a cult
• Some protagonists destined to be bullied
• And plot armor getting mugged in dark alleys
Side effects of reading may include:
• Spontaneous laughter
• Sudden desire to bully protagonists
• Questioning your life choices
• Wanting a system of your own (please don’t)
(If you lose IQ points while reading, that’s a feature, not a bug.)
Proceed at your own risk.
The abyss is waiting, and it brought snacks.