He was just outside the cave, sitting on a dry rock, watching the sky.
"A bright blue moon, almost twice the size of ours, with a smooth surface."
He focused on surviving, blinded to the reality of his situation.
So much so that he ignored all the eerily familiar but alien life around him.
Erwin reached for a contraption and turned the meat on a sharp stick.
He had encountered a small critter. A rabbit mole mix. It had wandered around the cave, perhaps searching for warmth, but it ended as his food.
"Long arms with big claws, and a meaty body. Never seen an animal like you, hope your taste is good."
Molerabbit was also scrawny, though he didn't know if the animal was hungry or just built like that.
New blue moon, unknown animals, and finally a monster straight from a fantasy story.
"I am either somewhere not on Earth, or this is one hell of a dream I am having." He murmured as he approached the cooked meat and cut a piece with his pocket knife.
"Leathery, and dry. But no weird taste or smell." He cut another piece. "Not the worst thing I ate."
Memories come to his head.
A fire made from a broken wooden door, a can of half-frozen dog food warming atop it.
Sounds of patrol helicopters in the sky and shells occasionally hitting the next neighborhood.
Followed by a stale bread cut in half and used as a bowl for the cooked dog food.
Erwin smiled. "Certainly not." He then pulled out a leather wallet.
The wallet itself was damaged and worn, with only one compartment. But that was more than enough, as Erwin pulled pictures folded into one another from it.
Many worn pictures with thick, bent lines and faded colors.
Erwin's eyes glided through them. Names, smiles, jokes, dreams, desires, and deaths all flashed in his mind.
"Soldiers under all so daring Captain Erwin." Erwin had a bittersweet smile, taking his time to look at each picture.
Around 25 people, one-fourth of a platoon, should be under the command of a second lieutenant, but were assigned to a captain for a campaign ill-prepared.
"Expected to cross one more name from the inheritance list, bastards. Wasn't expecting the kids and me to be so resilient."
Erwin shook his head. "Death doesn't revive, and the past matters not."
Erwin looked at the fire.
"Then that promise to him, to keep living, why I keep holding on."
*****
Erwin woke to the morning lights. Charred rocks from the campfire under him rumbled as he got up.
His mouth dry, he stretched, looking at the snowy forest before him. It was calm.
In this calmness, he reached into his pocket, took out a single cigarette, and took a puff.
Smoke entered his throat, then moved to his lungs, burning and warming his chest on the way.
With each breath, his became clearer. His situation, what just happened, settled on his mind.
But he didn't react; he didn't know how.
"Monsters, passage to a different world, snow-covered forest. Well, there were no Lion or witch, so I at least know where I am not." He snickered as he threw the finished cigarette to the ground.
The scorched butt bounced twice before stopping.
"I wish I could wake up in my bed or change the situation…" Erwin sighed. "Do with what you got, so what comes?"
"What can I even do at the moment?" Erwin stepped outside the cave. "Should I scream, ask for help, maybe pray?"
He felt the cold weather on his skin, sharp and numbing, but bearable.
"Not that I have any supplies to stay on my ass and wait for something to happen."
Scratching his head, Erwin began to walk in a circle.
Constantly mumbling, but saying nothing of value.
Till he stopped so suddenly, took a deep breath, and screamed.
Loud as he could, till his throat hurt. "Enough! Enough! Enough!" He shook his head. Holding it with his hand, pressing from the sides.
"I am done with overthinking. What good ever came from it anyway?"
Erwin raised his head and looked at the scenery, then smacked his lips, then rubbed his stomach, and breathed on his cold hands to warm them.
"Find water, then food, then I can make a decent fire. Yes, that will be my goal."
And Erwin stepped forward into the forest, on one hand, with the hatchet he got from the skeleton.
As he walked, he marked the trees to ensure safe passage, or at least a known route, back to his cave.
And as he did all these, his mind cleared again.
No memories, no flashbacks, just a dire feeling of something forgotten.
"Did I keep the stove on? The lights? Is the door locked? No… This feeling, this is something different."
But he ignored it.
Or tried to.
It kept lingering in his head. Even when he found a small, half-frozen stream, it was foremost on his mind. A huge hole that never filled.
Even when he dug the ground to pull some wild vegetables till his hands hurt, even when he plucked berries, and his fingers bled from thorns.
"Something, something missing."
When he returned to his cave, Erwin stopped at the door.
His arms relaxed and released themselves.
Berries and vegetables alike fell to the ground. Bounced back and forth.
His eyes widened, locked onto one point.
A woman with lush white hair, in a long dress, standing barefoot.
She turned to Erwin, her eyes hidden behind a cloth wrapped around her head. Cut, stitches, covered her body, missing nails, a line of stitch marks on the sides of her mouth, cuts on her ears.
But neither where she appeared, nor how she looked mattered to Erwin.
"I remember…"
That emptiness, the void.
Echoes of mocking voices that belong to something not human.
Memories his mind forbade him.
"A planet not his, laughs of 24, a set of puppet strings, and a cursed mark." He repeated
again and again, each repeat confusing him further
Frozen in his place, he didn't even see the woman in the dress approach him.
She approached him and grabbed the sides of Erwin's head. Her hands were dead cold.
Looking straight at Erwin's eyes, she smiled, and as she did, words appeared before him.
["I am sorry."]
Crystal, semi-transparent letters, appearing and disappearing one by one.
["But I am here now, don't fear."]
Her frozen hands, filled with warmth, she slowly caressed Erwin's cheeks.
["I know you want answers, so please, forget about that awful memory, and look at me. I may not tell you all you wish, but I can ease your heart."]