The next morning felt quieter, not because things were better, but because Mika didn't have the energy to feel everything at once anymore.She sat in the library earlier than usual, her notebook open but blank, her pen resting between her fingers as she stared at the page."You came early," Leo's voice came softly as he took his seat across from her."I couldn't sleep," Mika replied.Leo glanced at the untouched page. "You're trying to write?""I don't know what to write," she admitted. "Everything feels… mixed.""Then don't try to organize it," Leo said calmly. "Just write exactly what you feel, even if it doesn't make sense."Mika looked at the page again. "What if I don't like what I write?""Then at least it will be honest," he replied.There was a quiet pause.Mika slowly lowered her pen and wrote a few words, then stopped.Leo didn't interrupt."I wrote… 'I feel lost,'" she said quietly."That's a start," Leo nodded.Mika looked at the words again. "It feels small compared to everything.""Big emotions don't need big words," Leo said. "They just need truth."Mika stayed silent, then slowly wrote again.
Later that day, Mika walked through the hallway, her steps slower but steadier than before.She saw Akira laughing with others from a distance.For a moment, her chest tightened, but she didn't walk over.She didn't run either.She just… kept walking."That's new," she murmured to herself.
"Hey!" San's voice came as he appeared beside her again, holding two juice boxes. "I brought you one. Don't say no."Mika looked at him, then took it. "Thanks."San smiled. "You look… a little better today.""I don't feel better," Mika said honestly."That's okay," San replied quickly. "You don't have to feel better to look better. That counts as progress, right?"Mika gave a small nod.San watched her for a moment. "Did something change?""I talked to Leo," Mika said.San's smile paused for a second. "Oh.""He told me to write things down," she added."That sounds… like something he would say," San said, forcing a small laugh.Mika noticed it this time."You don't like him?" she asked quietly.San blinked. "No, no, it's not that. He's… he's good for you.""But?"San looked away for a second, then smiled again. "No 'but.' If he helps you, that's all that matters."Mika didn't reply, but something about his tone stayed with her.
That evening, Mika sat on her bed again, her notebook in her lap.She opened it slowly and looked at what she had written earlier."I feel lost."She added another line."I feel like I'm not enough."Her hand paused, then she continued."But I don't want to feel like this forever."She stared at the sentence for a long time."Is this what trying looks like?" she whispered.
A notification appeared on her phone.Her heart skipped for a second.She picked it up quickly.It wasn't Akira.It wasn't her ex.It was San."Did you eat today?"Mika stared at the message, then replied, "A little.""Good. That's better than nothing."She smiled faintly. "You always say that.""Because it's true," he replied instantly. "Small things matter more than you think."Mika looked at the screen for a moment, then typed, "Thank you… for staying."There was a pause.Then—"Always."Mika's smile faded slightly as she read that word again.
The next day in the library, Leo placed something small on the table in front of her.Mika looked down. It was a new notebook, darker, thicker."What's this?""For when that one fills up," Leo said simply.Mika blinked. "You think I'll fill it?""I know you will," he replied calmly.Mika held the notebook gently. "Why do you believe in me so much?"Leo looked at her, his expression steady. "Because you're trying, even when it's hard. Most people stop."Mika didn't know what to say.No one had ever said that to her before."Trying doesn't feel like enough," she said quietly."It is," Leo replied. "It's more than giving up."Mika nodded slowly.
That afternoon, Mika walked home alone, the city still loud, still crowded, but something felt slightly different.The noise didn't feel as overwhelming as before.Or maybe… she was just starting to hear herself too.
She reached home, ignored the usual questions, and went straight to her room.She opened her notebook again.This time, she didn't hesitate.
"I cried today.I smiled a little.I'm still hurting.But I'm still here."
She stared at the words, then leaned back against the wall.
"I'm still here…" she whispered softly.
And for the first time in a long while—
that felt like something.