Just when she had started gathering the fallen pieces of her life, destiny played its game again - scattering everything once more.
She would have never imagined, not even in her dreams, that a single night of uncontrolled emotions could change her life like this.
A girl who couldn't even go to the doctor alone for fever, someone who needed her mother beside her just to explain basic things -
was now forced to face everything on her own.
I can't tell Mom about all this... she trusts me more than anything. She'll loose faith in me.
Dad... he wouldn't understand.
And what would I even say? How did this happened?
I'm... doomed.
She left the hospital and went to the library, but her exhausted mind refused to focus on studying.
She sat blankly in the library garden, trying to figure out whom to reach out to... and before she even knew it, she was dialing his number.
She had gotten his number long ago - from one of his friends -
but had never gathered the courage to call.
She had never imagined the first time she would call him...
would be a moment like this.
A thousand thoughts ran through her mind as the call kept ringing.
"Hi... Aira," she heard -
and froze.
Then it hit her.
The voice was familiar...
but it wasn't coming from the phone.
It was Ben.
The phone was still ringing in her hand -
the call hadn't gone through.
To her surprise, she felt a strange sense of relief.
Someone who had walked away as if nothing had happened -
how would he react if he knew about the pregnancy...
the one left behind by a single night?
Would he even believe me?
She had so many questions -
but no one to ask.
"Hello..." Ben waved his hand in front her, trying to pull her back to the moment.
"Hey... what's up?" she asked, though her mind was still far away.
"Doing good... but you don't look well. What been going on with you lately? All good?" Ben asked, concerned.
"Yea... well... umm... it's just... the atmosphere... yeah, the atmosphere these days. I just don't like it." she stuttered.
"Are you sure? I mean... the weather couldn't be better." he said, clearly sensing something off inn her hesitation.
"Yea, but I just don't like it. Everything around me feels... irritating." she said, before she could stop herself.
"Oh... so it's not the weather, it's you. Getting blamed without reason, I feel bad for it," he said with a small smile, trying to lighten up her mood.
"Right... we shouldn't blame something that isn't at fault... anything or anyone that doesn't even know it is getting blamed.
But tell me something... who decides whose fault it really is?" she asked, as if searching for an answer to something she couldn't name.
"If something puts you in a situation that isn't entirely your fault... and walks away untouched by it...
then who is to blame?
Yourself... for being part of it?
Or the one who walked away like it meant nothing?" she added, her voice quieter now.
He paused for a second, realizing her question wasn't really about the weather.
"Look... I don't really know what you're talking about." he said, a little confused, "But I can answer your question.
It depends on how you choose to deal with it.
If it's rains... you can enjoy it...
or sit by the window and just watch it pass...
or blame it for the mess it leaves behind.
And if the mess feels too much...
you clean it... or you give it time.
In the end... you choose what you feel, and decide what you do.
For everything else...
they're just being what they are."
He paused, realizing he had said more than he actually understood.
His words eased something inside her -
not completely, but enough to breathe.
"But hey... if nothing works, just blame others for everything and walk away.
Easier that way - you never have to admit you were wrong.
That's my philosophy." he added with a smile, to lighten the mood.
"Thanks. You have been a really good friend." she said, meaning it more than she expected to.
All they way home, Ben's words kept circling in her mind.
Somehow, they gave her a sense of clarity... and a little strength.
She still wasn't strong enough to face everything...
But at least, her heart felt lighter.
Not long ago, she had been crying over him walking away...
and now, she was facing something far bigger - completely alone.
She waited - for a call, or even a message.
She tried again... dialing his number
But the call never went through.
The debate inside her refused to quite down.
One part blamed her for that night...
the other begged her to let got and focus on what mattered now.
And slowly...
her thoughts shifted to the lives she was carrying.
The word didn't register at first.
Pregnant.
It didn't feel real -
until it suddenly did.
She found herself trapped... once again, where even her bedroom felt suffocating.
Her loneliness pulled her closer to the the babies she was carrying, but practicality hit harder.
One moment she was sure of what she should do...
the next, she was checking her phone - hoping for something, anything, to reassure her.
Day went by, she knew she had to make a decision soon.
She had already decided to be practical -
this wasn't something she could take lightly.
It wasn't just her life anymore... bit two more.
But still needed reassurance... something to hold on to.
In search of that support, she went to the doctor and told her everything.
Hoping to hear something that would steady her.
"After everything that's happened, I'm sure of one thing
-
I can't play with three lives." she said.
"I'm unmarried and it just doesn't feel right when the father of the baby isn't even aware of anything. If I bring them to this world, it'll be unfair to them," she added, her voice barely steady.
The doctor looked at her for a moment before speaking.
"I understand," she said gently. "At this stage, we usually suggest continuing the pregnancy... but the decision is yours."
"I get it... It's just that I am scared," she admitted, hesitation clear in her voice.
"That's natural. But would you mind sharing what you feel? It will help you calm down," the doctor asked softly.
"About abortion... I'm scared of the pain...
of the emptiness it might leave behind...
and of never being able to feel this ever again" she said, finally letting her fears surface.
Her heart felt torn - restless, conflicted.
"You are still young. Don't burden yourself too much.
Just do what feels right in your heart.
I'll give you some space - think about it while I attend my rounds.
Take a deep breath. We'll talk when I am back ," the doctor said, leaving her alone to clear her head.
She had to decide.
She sat there in silence, her fingers tightening around the edge of the chair.
The word abortion echoed louder than anything else in the room.
Not just a decision... but an ending.
She closed her eyes for a moment.
And after fighting through every doubt in her mind, she made a choice.
By the time the doctor returned, she had already gone through every if and but.
"I... I'll go through with the abortion" she said her heart steady, even if her heart wasn't.
The doctor nodded. "Alright. I'll prescribe what you'll need."
She took the prescription, and for a moment...
the noise inside her mind went quiet.
Not because it was over -
but because the decision had been made.
She bought everything the doctor prescribed and returned, ready to end it all - once and for all.
But little did she know, fate had other plans.
She sat quietly waiting for the doctor - her eyes drifting from the prescription in her hand to the blank walls around her.
Suddenly, a faint vibration brushed against her palm.
Her phone was ringing.
She reached for it - but just as she pulled it out, the call ended.
With no expectation. she unlocked her phone to check who it was.
It rang again.
It was the call she had been waiting for.
Her body froze.
As if the strength had left her all at once.
Her mind, which had just settled... began to spiral again.
Her thumb hovered over the screen.
One tap - and everything could change.
But before she could even move her finger - the call ended.
Silence.
Heavy.
Unforgiving.
She sat there, stunned... conflicted all over again.
Just as she tried to process it -
her phone started ringing again.