Nephis tried to toss the packet back onto the floor, but it stuck to her skin for a second too long, causing her to jerk her hand back and nearly knock the rose-gold compact off her lap. A strangled, high-pitched noise—half-gasp, half-squeak—escaped her throat.
She scrambled out of the chair and looked from Sunny's pod to the door. Even though the room was empty, she felt a frantic, prickling sensation on the back of her neck, as if the very walls were judging her.
"Oh... God," she whispered, her voice cracking.
She didn't just pick it up; she snatched it, shoving the foil strip against her chest to hide it from view. Her heart was hammering a frantic rhythm against her ribs, and no matter how hard she fanned her face, the burning flush wouldn't go away.
"When—how—what is this doing here?!" Nephis's mind worked tirelessly to find the answer, all while she looked from Sunny's pod to the door, expecting someone to come in at any second. It was Effie! But after thinking about it, Nephis came to the conclusion that it made no sense. No, it could not be her; the purse was in my room, and she had never gone in. Effie had stayed near her door, but outside, while the purse sat in a forgotten corner of her vanity and had been there for years.
Calming her nerves a little bit, Nephis looked at the packet in her hands, searching her memory. The last time she had ever used this purse was before her grandmother died. Grandmother! Thinking of the woman made a memory surface. It had been a cool summer day at the time, and her grandmother was running some errands which Nephis was helping her with. They were walking through the aisle of the pharmacy when suddenly they had stopped to put some items in the cart.
While her grandmother was selecting items, Nephis had been looking around, not really interested, when from the corner of her eye she saw movement. Turning her head slightly, she saw a couple. The girl, not much older than her at the time, was holding hands with a black-haired boy. Nephis remembered that at some point, the boy grabbed a black box with golden letters and said something to the girl that made her giggle, while her cheeks turned a slight shade of red.
"I guess it's about that time." Nephis had turned to look at her grandmother at the sound of her voice and saw she was also looking at the couple. "You know, your grandfather and I were not much older than them when we had little Solis—your mother." Nephis looked at her grandmother, confused as to why she would bring up this topic.
Seeing this, her grandmother smiled slightly and moved down the aisle where the couple had been. Reaching up, she grabbed the same-looking box and put it in the cart. "Let's go, little one. We still have one more stop to make." Nephis was even more confused; her grandmother was a person who always planned her day ahead—making sudden changes was very unlike her.
"I thought this was the last stop of the day. Where else do we need to go?" following her out of the aisle, Nephis asked.
"To the supermarket. Tell me, which one is better: a banana, a cucumber, or a carrot?" They reached the cash register, and Nephis saw the couple from before again. They seemed to have finished checking out and were heading out, never stopping from holding hands and sharing secretive whispers.
"I don't know. What do you need them for?" Nephis never took her eyes off the couple, answering distractedly.
"You'll see," was the only answer her grandmother gave.
Later at home, her grandmother pulled out the carrot and said, "This is the most similar to the real thing in shape and length. Of course, your grandfather's was bigger. He truly was a stallion!"
She then produced the black box with golden letters. In the living room, her grandmother made her open one of the black squares and put it on the carrot; only afterward did she explain what she had just made her do. Nephis could still remember the laugh her grandmother had at her expense when the realization hit her. From then on, her grandmother always made her keep a pack of condoms in her purse under the pretense, "If you ever find someone as good as your grandfather to repopulate the Immortal Flame Clan, forget about these and start mating like rabbits. But until then, use the condoms."
Nephis let out a sigh. "Of course. How could I have forgotten her machinations?" Nephis whispered, looking at the strip of dark squares. Curious, she looked at the expiration date. "Surely they don't work anymore."
They did.
Nephis let out a little laugh. Grandma really picked out the good stuff—eight years of shelf life.
Looking around the room, there was nowhere to put them, and somehow the purse had disappeared when she suddenly stood up, which meant she was forced to keep holding the strip. Looking at her communicator and not wanting to waste more time on her visit, Nephis approached Sunny's pod. Like always, he was motionless, his face a marbled statue that she could never stop appreciating.
Looking back at the door and seeing it was closed, Nephis decided that it was okay to open Sunny's pod. She wanted to at least hold his hand. "Hey, Sunny." Her voice was soft, as if not to wake him. "I guess you heard they're making a movie about us." She started rubbing his hand with her thumb. "You're famous; they even gave you a title: The Star's Dark Half. I don't know who even came up with that. It's ridiculous." A small chuckle escaped her at the admission. Nephis kept quiet for a while after that, letting the silence stretch, her only focus on Sunny's hand.
"You wouldn't believe what I found in my purse today. A condom—can you believe it? It was placed there by my grandma, and I forgot all about it." She let a little private laugh slip out. When the sound faded, silence was all that was left. Putting Sunny's hand down gently, Nephis caressed Sunny's face.
"Grandma, what should I do?" Her voice started to quiver, and her vision grew glassy. "I think I found the one, but he's not here with me—and worst of all, I betrayed him." Nephis's tears started to fall, some of them landing on Sunny's face and sliding across his cheeks.
"I'm sorry." She quickly cleaned them away with her finger. When she was finished, her hands lay on his chin, her thumb resting on his lips. She caressed them, noting their shape and smoothness.
"I wish you were here with me, even if you hate me for what **I—**for what Cassie and I did." It was hard saying those words. The thought of him hating her was something she wanted to deny, but she knew that it was true. How could he not, after we stabbed him, not only metaphorically but also physically? Nephis ran her hand along his leg where Cassie had pierced him with the rapier. Of course, she found no wound.
Taking her hand away from his leg, Nephis placed it on his chest, right over his heart. She had gotten into the habit of doing this every time she came; it wasn't enough to just see his vitals on the pod computer. She liked to feel the strong heart that Sunny seemed to have, even with his small stature.
"Please come back to me, Sunny, even—" Her voice hitched. "—even if you hate me—" A sob escaped her. "Just come back, please. I'll take all your fury—" Nephis laid her head on his chest and hugged Sunny with one arm. "Just please, don't die." This thought had tormented her every time her thirty minutes ran out and she had to wait.
At times like this, when the thought of Sunny dying ran rampant in her mind, Nephis would just lay her head on his chest, close her eyes, and listen. The steady beat of the muscle could be heard and felt; it was like a drum that was being hit two times every second. The sound made her mind quiet. Her breathing, which had begun to become agitated, slowed, and she could feel her body starting to loosen, the stress leaving her limbs.
Opening her eyes, she just looked up at him, enjoying the warmth of his body. "You know, Effie suggested I bring you home with me. Just move all your stuff to the manor. I think it's a good idea; that way, I'll be able to do this more." Nephis ran her finger along the bridge of his nose.
"I know Effie is right, but still—"
Nephis knew it was a bad idea to bring Sunny back with her. She also knew that there were probably no other places safer for Sunny than the Academy, protected as it was by the government.
Still, I wish I had a part of him. Not just a simple lock of hair. Something more. Something that will make me feel connected to him. Another memory appeared in her mind, making Nephis stand up suddenly and look at Sunny.
"Grandma once said that situations like this had happened before." Nephis could see it clearly; the memory took place next to the hearth in the manor. It was night, and Nephis had been reading a book about the time the Nightmare Spell first appeared.
She remembered her grandma coming into the room and mentioning, "I remember the time before the Nightmare Spell appeared. It was complete chaos, with countries fighting each other using bombs and all sorts of nasty stuff. But the thing that pained me the most was the lack of children."
At the comment, Nephis had closed the book and looked at her grandmother, not understanding. Seeing this, her grandmother sat down. "You see, Nephis, before the Nightmare Spell, countries had been having problems getting their citizens to have children for a variety of reasons. But that all changed with the Nightmare Spell."
Now, Nephis was really confused. She didn't understand how the Nightmare could have solved a problem like that.
"How could the Nightmare Spell ever solve a problem like that?" At the time, Nephis had asked. Her grandma patted her on the head.
"Well, Nephis, people simply got desperate. More accurately, women got desperate. At the start, the Nightmare Spell didn't discriminate—that was true—but the statistics showed that there were more males infected than females. Those statistics also showed that most of them were dying, since at that time, using a weapon that wasn't a gun wasn't common.
Listen up, Nephis, because this is something that won't appear in any general history book, but it was recorded, and I even saw it with my own eyes. Hell, the Clan did it a few times. When men became infected and fell asleep, if they had a partner—a wife, a girlfriend, or whatever, the point is a woman who really cared about them—they would sleep with the man's unconscious body and collect as much of his seed as they were able to.
You may think this was a cold tactic to keep up the lineage, and sometimes it was. But in truth, those women were just scared for their lovers and wanted to keep something of them. A piece of the man they loved that would make them feel connected in case he never came back from the slumber. And like that, little Nephis, crazy women brought the birth rate curve up. Aren't we awesome!"
Nephis had nodded, a big smile on her face, and gave a thumbs-up to her grandma.
Focusing her eyes, Nephis looked at Sunny.