Holding his gaze with my own calm expression, I thrust the knife into his heart.
I had envisioned the scene so perfectly but I could not take myself to do it. I knew why. I was not a monster. I was not born or made a monster.
"I am not like them"I chanted continuously as my hands shook with fury. But I couldn't do it. I was not cruel. I was just weak and powerless, I realised before I burst into tears.
Angus allowed me to cry for a while before he came to me. He placed his hand on my shoulders and he stared into my eyes. His touch was warm but his eyes still lacked warmth. My soul chilled with fear as I stared into the eyes as dark as a bottomless sea.
"You can't do it. Can you?", he asked, his voice laced with mockery and a hint of sympathy. I wanted stab him with the knife again. "Believe whatever you like, I won't try to change your mind. Your friend is gone forever, you should let her go", he added without emotions and tears streamed down my face.
"I hate you", I told him. And I meant it.
"I know, dear. Believe me, I know. The feeling is mutual, we just can't help this attraction". As if to prove his point, he slammed his lips on mine.
Shaking my head, I began to fight him. But it was irrelevant. It felt as if I was fighting myself. I let go and I let the emotions control me. I kissed him back and I was ashamed of it.
Angus devoured my mouth vigorously, his mouth moving in sync with mine. His hand trailed from my shoulder down to my lower back and a tremor ran through me. He sucked on my lips as he thrusted his tongue into my mouth. With a final tug at my lip, we finally broke free of ourselves.
"I have prepared a meal for us.", he told me. Immediately my ear caught on the word 'meal', my throat suddenly became dry and I started looking around the room, making Angus to smile. But I didn't care. I just wanted the meal even if it was leftover. That was when he grabbed my hand.
"Let's take a bath together ", he said and as if he realised I was about to decline, he pulled me towards the bathroom.
I didn't say anything. It all felt like a dream and nightmare to me. This hot and cold.
When we got in, he released my hand like a dirt he has long wanted to get rid of. With his gaze fixated on me, he began to undress. I immediately turned around and I heard him chuckle. But he didn't tell me to look.
"I'm all done now."
I turned around only to find him streaked naked. I squealed and was about to turn away when he took hold of my hand and I was twirled around till I was facing him.
Heat rose to my cheeks as I tried not to look at him. It was quite embarrassing if you ask me. But he didn't share the same view as I did.
His laughter felt strange to my ears. Strangely nice. It was unusual to hear the ever moody Angus smile let alone laugh. For the first time, I stared contentedly at him. At his gaithy and his muscluline beauty.
His face, the curve of his jaw, the shape of his nose. His collar bones. His full lips. I stared to my contentment.
"Don't tell me you've never seen a man's nakedness before", he teased and I quickly looked away, but he did not allow me to wallow in timidity. He kissed me and I grew a bit confident in his warm hold.
"We need to bath now", he murmmured against my lips and we unlocked the kiss. I stood before him while he stared expectedly at me. Blinking severally, I stepped closer to him and I turned my back to him. He loosened my "chest_wrap" and I uncovered my chest. Holding his gaze, I loosened my wrapper until I was standing purely naked before him.
That evening, Angus bath for me and fed me. It was the first time I ate an healthy food. The very first time I ate a warm food. The first time I ate to my full.
Every once in a while, I would catch him staring at me. His brows furrowed and sometimes, his cheek flushed and his nose flared, as if in annoyance. I would understand if he was embarrassed by me.
"Freye, lay with me", he suddenly said and my eyes widened with shock.
"M-m-master?", I gasped and he shook his head.
"Call me Angus whenever you are here with me", he told me softly. I could only nod. Taken aback by the strange affection. I was reluctant but "no" was quite heavy on my lips.
"A-Angus", his name rolled out of my mouth. It felt so natural on my lips, as if I had always called it. As if it has always been minw. But I knew not. It was all an illusion that will soon shatter into pieces.
He must have felt the same because he pulled me to his chest and he kissed me.
That night, I slept on the same bed as Angus. I waited so long for him to make sexual advancement to me but he did not. And I was ready. I knew it was what was expected of me after his so very kind gestures. When sleep began to drift me away, he whispered into my ear.
"Dear Freye, be mine."
My eyes flew open at once. I thought I had heard wrong but it was not.
"Be my mistress and my woman. I will share with you not only my bed but my warmth. I might not love you but I shall care for you as I do all things mine. Be mine Under The Oak, in secret", he said but I kept my silence. Because I knew, I had just entered into a consensual slavery.