After training finished Maya and Jasper made their way up to his room intending to hop through a quick shower.
"Ya know, I was kind of surprised that you were the one teaching us" Maya commented idly as she combed her fingers through her hair.
Jasper cocked an eyebrow, "and just who did you think would be the one teaching you?"
"I assumed it would be Major" Maya admitted with a shrug.
"Normally he would have, but he tends to be a little ruff during training. As such we decided it would be best if I trained you guys."
Maya giggled at the thought. Watching him train everyone had made her lust skyrocket and because of that his innocent comment sent her mind straight into the gutter.
"What?"
Maya waved his question off, still laughing. "It nothing. Just the way you phrased it. My darling soldier boy does like to play ruff after all."
The Major growled at her response and Jasper internally sighed, relinquishing control without a fight. Over the past few months with Maya he had grown more accepting of the Major. Going so far as to allow him control more often, but only in her presence. When it was just the two of them, Major was calmer. He was also, for the first time since he appeared, willing to just sit and talk, wanting to get to know their mate as much as Jasper was.
However judging by the emotions Major was feeling right now talking was not what he had in mind.
The moment Major had full control, he moved so he was directly behind his still laughing mate and put one hand on the back her neck, gently forcing her down so she was bent over the bathroom counter. He followed her down so that his chest was pressed against her back, keeping her pined, and his lips just brushed along her ear.
"Tell me Doll, what part of our time together makes the word 'boy' come to mind for you?" he whispered.
A shudder racked her body at his tone as Maya shifted her head to the side so that he could see her smile. "Why your overwhelming exuberance Major."
She giggled again at his unimpressed look, grateful to finally have something else to focus on today besides the upcoming battle. Something that would take her mind off everything and the heavy tension that had settled over everyone.
"Are you implying that I am unable to take you any other way?" Major asked with a raise brow.
"Maybe" Maya teased.
Major let out another growl at that and stood up to yank the skirt of her dress up over her hips. He practically purred at the sight of her already wet for him. "Does the thought of my 'exuberance' excite you so much?" He taunted her, pressing his still clothed member against her folds.
Maya groaned at the sensation. "Mm yes. I love how you take me."
"Oh I know Doll." He leaned back down to whisper in her ear again, "But I wouldn't really be proving you wrong if I did that now would I? After all, I can't have you thinking of me as a boy now can I?"
She opened her mouth to say something. What exactly she didn't know. But what came out instead was a shriek as Major slammed into her from behind. He gave her no warning and the combination of shock and feeling of being stretched so fully drove all thought from her mind. Her hands shot out to try and find something to grab onto, eventually hitting the wall. Her claws sprung out and she desperately dug them in, uncaring of the marks she was leaving.
As she caught her breath, she braced for the feeling of Major slamming into her as he usually did, but that was not what happened. Instead he began to slowly glide in and out of her at an excruciatingly slow pace.
She whined at the feeling. After today's training session where she watched as Jasper took control and barked out orders she had already been desperate for him. The speed at which Major was moving inside her only serving to heighten that need. With everything going on she wanted hard and fast. She wanted him to fuck the worries right out of her mind. To make her forget that in three days time she and her loved ones would be fighting for their lives. To use her so thoroughly that she was too lost in pleasure to even remember her own name.
But this? This speed was not it. Every thrust of his was precise and hit her in just the right spot, only his gentleness failed to bring her the mind-numbing ecstasy that moved too fast for her process that she craved today.
"Major please" She moaned.
"Please what? You have to use your words Doll" He teased, knowing already what she was asking for.
"Please go faster. I need more." She pushed her hips back, trying to entice him into moving faster.
He grinned down at her and brought his hands up to hold her hips so that she couldn't move them anymore. "Oh no. Certainly not Doll. After all to do that would be to prove you right and I certainly can't have that. Now, can I?"
Maya hadn't thought it possible but he somehow slowed down even more causing tears of frustration to begin sliding down her face. Every nerve that he touched was alight with pleasure, but his speed kept it constant, never allowing her to reach the peak she sought. "Please Major," She whined, "I was wrong, okay? There is no part of you that is a boy. Just please, please fuck me faster!"
Major didn't listen to her. While she might be in agony right now, he was discovering that he liked this speed. Yes, he loved any chance to take his girl and usually drove into her with enough speed and force to break any human, but he was enjoying the change. Even if it was straining his self-control. It enabled him to truly feel every inch of her and her begging only added to his pleasure.
"You're not the one who decides the pace Doll, I am. And I for one am loving this speed. God I can feel every inch of you stretching around me, every quiver and movement." He threw his head back, closing his eyes to savour the moment.
Realizing he would not be giving into her, she let out a sob and began to squirm. She tried to free her hips, to gain some control of the pace but he gripped her harder, effectively stopping her attempts.
When she finally stopped fighting him he raised a hand and brought it down on her ass, leaving a red mark. "You really are being a bad girl today, aren't you? Did almost winning against Jasper make you think you could take control of your own pleasure?"
She rushed to reassure him, worried he would do something else to torment her. "No! Never!"
"Then what is it that has you acting out today?" He asked, massaging the area he had slapped as he did.
He had a good idea of what was bothering her, but he also knew that she tended to bottle it all up. It was part of the reason why he was teasing her so. He wanted her to open up to him, to trust him and rely on him to make it better. Something she would not do unless first prompted. Or in this case; very desperate for the pleasure he could give her.
She stayed quiet for another moment, causing him to give her another slap. She sucked in a breath in shock, tightening around him unconsciously as he continued to move within her slowly.
"I want you to make me forget" She finally admitted quietly.
He smiled down at her in pride, although she could not see it from the angle her head was at. "You want to forget what?" he asked, gently prompting her to explain more.
"Everything. This whole situation with the newborns, the fact that one of us could die, the fact that YOU could die. I want you to make me forget it all. I want you to fuck me so hard that I can't even remember my own name" she confessed. Her voice rising with each word until she was practically yelling at the end, tears falling down her face.
As she finished, he stopped moving and leaned down over her. He gently brushed a few stray hairs off her face before turning her head and capturing her lips in an equally gentle kiss.
"Good girl" he praised softly. "You can't hold it all in like that Doll. You have to let it out. You have to tell me what's wrong so I can make it better."
"Yes Major. I'll try" she promised a few tears still falling.
"Good. Now once more Doll, what do you want me to do?"
"I want you to fuck me. Hard and fast."
"Anything for you Doll." He pulled back until he was almost fully out of her before slamming back into her.
He drilled into her, hard and fast. Not giving her a moment to catch her breath at the change in pace. Neither of them bothered with attempting to talk. Instead the only thing that could be heard was the sound of their panting breaths and moans of pleasure.
Maya's whole body was on fire with need, Major using his gift to drive it higher than she thought possible. She cried out as he hit the spot that set her whole body alight and he shifted so he continued to hit it with every thrust.
True to his word, he drove her insane with pleasure. Every worry and thought fled her head as the only thing she could focus on was the sensation of him driving himself into her.
Major growled as he felt Maya clenching down on him again and again. He allowed his head to once again fall back as he squeezed her hips tighter. Feeding off the desire coming from her, the only thing he was capable of focusing on was his mate. As he felt his own release building he slammed into her harder, eyes flying open to look down at her. He released one of his hands and brought it up to tangle in her hair, pulling it so her head was tilted back.
At the brief flash of pain, Maya's eyes flew open. Noticing her new position, her eyes moved to meet Major's in the mirror. The moment she caught sight of his intense gaze she let out a moan as her walls clenched down on him harder than ever. He growled in pleasure and the sound practically sent her over the edge then and there.
She felt her orgasm approaching fast and opened her mouth to warn him. Only to find herself unable to form the words through the pleasure he was giving her. All she managed in the end was a strangled moan of his name as he once again hit all the right spots, eyes never leaving hers.
"Cum" he ordered, fighting back his own orgasm so they could cum together.
That was all she needed. She came all over his cock as his seed spilled into her. She screamed his name, eye shut tight as the sensation overwhelmed her.
When at last they were finally done and he had slipped out of her, she lay there, sprawled out over the counter, catching her breath.
"We should ... we should do this ... in front ... of the ... mirror more often" she told him between gasps of breath.
He grinned over at her from where he was turning on the shower. "Indeed. But for now, we both need a shower."
With a groan she managed to push herself up and turned to head towards the shower.
She made it exactly one step before her numb legs gave out on her and she began to crumple towards the floor. Major was quick to catch her, hoisting her up into his arms.
He smirked down at her and raised a brow. "Tired?"
"Mm" was all she managed in reply.
He laughed at her as he moved them both over to the shower. Once they were under the water, he placed her on her feet, but kept a hand around her waist to support her.
"Well that is certainly too bad" he told her, leaning down to bite her ear gently, "we are only just getting started after all."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Much later Maya was curled up in bed with Jasper's arms wrapped around her. She was fiddling with his fingers as they lay there in a comfortable silence, both of them lost in thought.
"You know," Maya began, keeping her eyes focused on his fingers, "you haven't really told me how you feel about all this."
Jasper withdrew his arms at that and propped himself up so he could see her better. "What do you mean?"
"Well you've mentioned that this was bringing it all back for you but you haven't said anything beyond that." Maya rolled over as she spoke, scanning his face for any hint of how he was feeling.
He gave a sigh. "It's not important how I feel Darlin'. The army is coming either way and we will have to fight it."
"No," she reached up to cup his face, "it is important. How you feel matters. It matters to me and it matters to your family. You're not just some soldier anymore, you're the love of my life and I want to know how you are feeling."
Jasper stared at her, shocked at her words. He hated to admit it, but he had sort of been acting like he had when he was part of Maria's army. She hadn't cared what you thought or what you felt, only if you could still fight. As such he had grown accustomed to keeping everything to himself and pushing through it all. A habit that had come back as this new situation arose with the army in Seattle. He supposed that really made him lucky then that he had Maya here to notice and verbally smack some sense back into him.
"What did I ever do to deserve you?" he wondered allowed.
Maya snorted. "In this case? You unleashed Major on me who forced me to admit the very same problem you're having now."
"Mm, remind me to thank him."
"You do that cowboy" Maya told him with a laugh before growing serious. "But be honest with me, how are you doing?"
Jasper rubbed his hands over his face and fell back on the bed with a sigh. "Honestly? Disappointed in myself." At her confused look, he continued. "I've spent close to seventy years trying to leave behind the man I was during the vampire wars. To erase the 'God of War'. Yes, I still have Major, but we both agreed that we were done with those times. Now we're in the middle of this mess, and don't get me wrong we are both more than willing to fight for our family, but I hate how easy it was to fall back into the role of soldier. To be the man that trained soldiers. Who I was at training today, that was me during my time with Maria. I wasn't thinking about how what I was teaching would keep my family safe, I was thinking about how to best use their different strengths and skills to win."
As he finished Maya pulled him close, brining him into a hug. She honestly wasn't sure what she could say to his confession to make him feel better, but she knew she had to say something.
"I can't say I can even begin to fully understand what you're going through," she began slowly, choosing her words carefully, "but I can tell you that you should not feel disappointed in yourself. You spent seventy-five years learning how to and being a soldier. You can't expect to unlearn something like that in less time than you spent learning it. Especially when dealing with a situation that is so similar to your past. I mean ... if it worked for you in the past, then it would make sense that you try the same thing again ..." Maya trailed off then, contemplating how to voice the next part.
Taking a deep breath and swallowing the guilt blooming in her chest, she decided to just go for it. "And as for you falling into the role so easily ... I think that we are partially to blame. None of us asked if you were comfortable doing this. If you were okay with what's going on and for that I am truly very sorry. We shouldn't have put this on you and its our fault for forcing you into the role you have tried so hard to leave behind."
"It's not your fault. You all need this training" he told her quietly, running his hand through her hair.
Maya shook her head, grabbing the hand in her hair to hold, feeling even more guilt that he tried to reassure her, even when he was the one suffering. "Yes, it is. We had other options. I could have fought harder to get the Volturi involved, consequences for this family for not turning Bella be damned. Or if they really were not an option we could have reached out to others for help. I'm sure Carlisle has friends that would have been willing to lend us a hand. But instead, we all got caught up in solving this ourselves and put all the pressure on you. So please, don't feel disappointed in yourself, not when most of the blame should be put on us for forcing you into it. For knowing how hard you have worked to leave you past behind you and asking this of you anyways."
He was quiet for a long time, mulling over her words. They hadn't completely absolved him of the disappointment he felt in himself, but they did help a great deal. Not the part about Maya and his family being to blame, he didn't believe they were at all. Even if they had not asked this of him, he would have done it anyways. This was his family. He loved them and he would always do what he could to protect them.
Gazing into the worried eyes of his mate he let out a sigh. "I don't blame you."
Startled at his sudden announcement, she pushed up further to stare down at him in shock. "What?"
"I don't blame you" he repeated. "You said you should have asked, but I could have spoken up at any time. I could have told you all no. And besides, there was no way I was going to stay out of it. You and this family are everything to me. I am always going to do whatever I can to protect you all."
Maya let out a rueful laugh at that. "I suppose I can't fault you for that logic. Especially when I and everyone else are willing to do the same for you. But really, this just further proves what I know of you to be true."
Now it was his turn to pull back to look at her with confusion, which caused her to smile as she reached out to stroke his face. "Back when you first told me your story, you described yourself as a monster and I told you that you weren't. I told you that you were a man who loved fiercely and was willing to do anything for the ones you cared for no matter what it meant for you. And here you are doing it again; putting yourself through all this to ensure that your family survives. Using everything you learned and facing your past to help us. You really are amazing you know that right? And if you ever get to feeling like you're not, then I want you to remember one thing: this is your choice. I know you say that you stayed with Maria because you thought you were mates, but I know it was also because you didn't think you had any other options outside of the fighting. Here, you know you have other options, but you are choosing to stay and help protect your family despite your past. You are so amazing and so strong because I don't know anyone else that would willingly wade back into their own personal hell for others like you're doing."
When she finished, she snuggled down on his chest, a yawn escaping as the day's events caught up with her. She wasn't asleep yet, but she definitely was fading fast and no longer had the energy to keep her head up. But there was one last, very important thing she wanted to tell him before she fully drifted off to sleep.
"That being said Cowboy, we are here to. You can rely on us. Rely on me. You're not alone this time and we will always be here for you if and when it becomes too much. We will never be disappointed in you or upset if that does happen. We all love you so much and just want you to be okay and happy. You can lean on us a little more. That is what family is for after all, to support and help you when you need it."
She new that everything wasn't fully settled yet, that he was still struggling. But she also knew that they had both at least taken the first step today in getting each other to talk about what was bothering them. There would be more time to figure everything out further. So with a contented sigh she allowed her body to relax and murmured "I love you Jasper" before allowing her eyes to slip closed.
Jesus, this woman was too much for him, he thought as he wrapped his arms around her. He had a feeling that even at his worst, she would be able to pull him out of the darkness with only a few words. Somehow, she always knew just what to say. Even when she stumbled her way through it and tripped over her own words, he could clearly see and feel the sincerity behind it. How she truly believed what she was saying and somehow it never failed to make him see things in a new light.
Yes, he was still upset that being a soldier was still so comfortable a role for him, but she had made it bearable. He no longer felt like he was being crushed by the disappointment and anger he'd kept hidden inside himself. The feeling that he had not really changed at all. That he was still the same newborn that did Maria's bidding and had no real control or mind of his own.
Maya had put it all in perspective for him. Made him realize what was so different about this fight from others; it was his choice. Not Maria's, not whoever their enemy was, not his families. It was his choice to fight. To fight and protect his family. And honestly, that thought made all the difference. He was not the poor lost boy who followed orders because he didn't know any better. He was a full-grown man who knew exactly what he was getting into.
Yes, his past was still influencing how he dealt with this situation, but as Maya had said he had support now. He had a beautiful and wonderful mate who could help him work past that. He had a family that didn't see him as a commander or someone to be feared, but as a brother and a son. They certainly wouldn't be afraid to speak out if they thought he was going too far down the wrong path. None of them would stand by as he lost himself to his past. They would all be there for him to pull him back, just as he would be for any of them.
With those thoughts in mind, he allowed his own body to relax. Drifting off into a meditative state that was as close to sleep as a vampire ever got. He allowed a contented smile to rise to his lips as he did. For the first time since they learned that there was a newborn army coming for them he wasn't worried or troubled by his past.