"Master, what you just said could be very easy for a girl to misunderstand." Gold Ship narrowed her eyes and looked at Tang Han meaningfully.
"Ah, sorry. That's not what I meant." Tang Han immediately realized how misleading his wording had been and hurried to explain. "Bro Ship, don't overthink it. I just want you to be my bodyguard."
"I figured." Gold Ship nodded.
Their wavelengths were highly compatible. In truth, even without Tang Han explaining, she had already understood what he meant and would not misinterpret it.
If not for the Doctor's Coat hiding his eyes, they might even have been able to communicate through eye contact alone.
"If it were any other horse girl, Master, you'd be in serious trouble by now. Good thing I'm the first-rate Gold Ship. Ohohohoho—" Gold Ship copied Saint Light's haughty laugh.
"As expected of you, Bro Ship." Tang Han praised her just as he usually praised Saint Light.
But unlike his perfunctory compliments to Saint Light, this praise was sincere.
As expected of one of the true gods of weird fanfic. Even if he misspoke, she could still understand him. He could talk to her freely without worrying she would jump him.
"So, your answer…?"
"Hahaha, no thanks." Gold Ship clasped her hands behind her head and refused.
"Huh? Why?" Tang Han had assumed she would agree right away. He had not expected a rejection.
Gold Ship tilted her head back and looked up at the sky. "Because staying by one person's side all the time is boring. Especially as a bodyguard. You'd have to keep staring at scenery that never changes. That's even more boring."
Tang Han: "..."
This was bad. Gold Ship might be a good bro, but aside from certain important matters, she only did things she found interesting.
Should he pick another horse girl as his guard instead?
The first one Tang Han thought of was Urara.
But Urara was a little angel who believed everyone had good intentions. If a dangerous horse girl tried to jump him, she could probably fool Urara with a few sweet words and send her off to buy medicine for Tang Han on the way.
Urara was no good.
So Tang Han thought of another one of the true gods of weird fanfic: Oguri Cap.
But he was not close to Oguri at all, and her eyes were always on food. A dangerous horse girl could probably toss a snack in the opposite direction, lure Oguri away, and abduct Tang Han in the next second.
After considering it carefully, Tang Han concluded that the bodyguard position really had to belong to Gold Ship.
Tang Han calmed himself and made a proposal. "Bro Ship, how about this? I can play riddles with you."
Gold Ship loved playing riddles with him, so Tang Han figured that as payment, this should be enough to convince her.
But Gold Ship still refused.
"Lately, if I play riddles, it causes the universe to flicker, which leads to aliens invading my home planet, which means Concrete No. 29 stops tasting good. So I don't want to do that."
She explained it with complete seriousness.
After stripping away all the nonsense, the simple version was: she was tired of riddles for now.
"Uh…" Tang Han scratched his head.
If he wanted Gold Ship as his bodyguard, he had to offer her something she was interested in at this moment.
But lately she did not want to play riddles. So what else could tempt her?
"Wait!" Tang Han suddenly thought of something.
"How about this?"
He pulled out Training Equipment: From Treadmills to Children's Toys and flipped it to one particular page.
"If you become my bodyguard, I'll make this for you."
He pointed to the page's illustration of a children's toy: an alien spaceship.
The moment Tang Han first saw it in the book, he had felt it suited Gold Ship perfectly. It was practically custom-made for her.
The extraterrestrial oddball Gold Ship would definitely love this toy.
"Oh?" Gold Ship took one look at the illustration and her eyes lit up.
Just as Tang Han had expected, the alien spaceship instantly seized her full attention.
Because this was not some simple model. According to the book, it could actually be controlled like a remote-control aircraft, and it came equipped with several "weapons," such as a squirt gun, smoke bombs, and a mechanical claw.
Most importantly, it was sturdy enough to withstand a horse girl's full-force hit. If she used it to prank McQueen in the future, she would not have to worry about it being smashed in one punch.
Gold Ship felt that if she got this alien spaceship, she could play with it for an entire year without getting bored.
"I want it!" Her eyes were practically shining with desire.
At first she had thought about making it herself. But the manufacturing process looked complicated, and though the author's description was concise, it was also weird enough that she could not fully understand it.
She probably could not make it.
But Tang Han looked like he could.
For the sake of obtaining that toy, Gold Ship was willing to agree to something not too outrageous.
"So as long as I stay by your side when needed, you'll give me this, right?" Gold Ship pointed at the spaceship in the book.
Tang Han replied, "You don't need to be with me all the time. Only when I'm going somewhere remote and secluded. That's when I'll call you in for protection. And the spaceship is just the deposit. Later, I'll make you even more interesting toys."
"Oh?" The stars in Gold Ship's eyes sparkled even brighter.
She thought about it and realized she was not losing out at all. If anything, she was making a huge profit.
All she had to do was casually protect Tang Han once in a while, and she would get all sorts of fun toys.
"Alright. Protecting you so Miss Tazuna doesn't catch you again, right? I accept the commission." Gold Ship extended her hand to him.
"Nice!" Tang Han clasped it.
The commission was officially established.
"Hmph." Tang Han felt a little pleased with himself.
With Bro Ship protecting him, he would never have to fear being ambushed by Tazuna again.
"Wait. How do you know it was Miss Tazuna?" Tang Han suddenly realized something.
He had not told Gold Ship what had happened earlier. So how had she already guessed the person he needed protection from was Hayakawa Tazuna?
"I figured it out ages ago." Gold Ship folded her arms and lifted her chin proudly.
"I don't know how close you and Miss Tazuna are, but normally you avoid intimate contact with any female, and that includes adorable little Urara. You try not to touch her whenever possible."
"And yet you're carrying Miss Tazuna's body scent on you. That means she must have forcibly caught you and locked you in some dark little room."
"And at this concentration, you probably even held each other while sleeping for a while."
"Judging by how exhausted you look, you must have just run away from her. That's why you suddenly wanted to hire me as your bodyguard. Am I right?"
With one round of deduction, Gold Ship had reconstructed what had happened with almost perfect accuracy.
"Oh?" Tang Han was genuinely surprised. She had picked apart his secret that easily.
But far from being angry about her exposing him to his face, he felt sincere admiration for her observational ability.
Since he had already hired her as his bodyguard, he ought to trust her. There was no point hiding things from her.
In fact, letting Gold Ship know he had just been caught by Tazuna might be for the best. It would help her keep a sharper eye out and stop Tazuna from approaching him again.
So Tang Han praised her. "That was sharp, Bro Ship. You really figured all that out."
Hearing that the truth was exactly as she had deduced, Gold Ship folded her arms, adjusted the nonexistent glasses on her nose, and grinned smugly.
"Hmph. I'm Tracen Academy's great detective. Any tiny detail can become a clue leading me to the truth."
"Impressive." Tang Han applauded.
"Heh heh~" Gold Ship's smile widened even further.
Talking with Tang Han was always fun. He was smart, broad-minded, and basically the ideal bestie in her heart.
Gold Ship thought that since Tang Han had already shared his secret, she ought to share a secret of her own too.
So she said, "Master, let me tell you something interesting. Three days ago, Chairwoman Rudolf personally entrusted me with a top-secret mission. According to her, it was no easier than dealing with a terrorist attack on the academy."
"What mission?"
"To track down the mysterious man who appeared in front of the Three Goddesses statue earlier. The chairwoman said that if I found him, I was to knock him out and drag him back. Apparently a whole bunch of horse girls want to hold a wrestling match with him."
Tang Han quietly took two steps backward, widening the distance between them.
Help. Suddenly he did not want to hire Gold Ship as his bodyguard anymore.
Join here to read ahead.
In Star Rail, Ultra-Beast Armored — Have I Caught "Equilibrium"? l (Chapter 80)
Uma Musume, But I Only Have Five Years Left to Live (Chapter 178)
Zenless Zone Zero: I'm a Doctor, Not a Bangboo (Chapter 150)
Ben Tennyson Wants to Join the Justice League ( 126 )
TYPE-MOON: Redemption Beginning with the Holy Grail War (Chapter110)
Yu-Gi-Oh! — Transmigrated into the White Dragon Girl (Chapter190)
"Is this chat group even serious?" (Chapter105)
I, Lord Ravager, Utterly Loyal! (Chapter222)
Can Playing Games Save the World? 65
Crossover Anime Multiverse: The Demon Hunter of an Unnatural World 77
From Junkman to Wasteland 66
Weekly Refresh of Overpowered 31
I'm Grinding Proficiency Like 46
From Kiana, Lord Ravager, Onwa 190
Honkai: Is This Still the Prev 42
Elf: My Starter Pokémon Is Inc 65
Warhammer: My Primarch Is Remi 170
From Demon Slayer to Grand Ass Volume2/5
The Way the Umamusume Look at 68
Uma Musume, but My Cheat Power 215
Naruto: Weaving the Future, Be 65
Zenless Zone Zero, but Kamen R 76
Multiverse Crossover: The Perf 66
My Cyberpsycho Girlfriend 65
Uma Musume: The Dark Trainer 200
Uma Musume: A Calamity Born fr 154
I, a Reincarnation-Loop Player Volume4/30
The Violent Girl Group Is Beat 115
Uma Musume: The Horse Girl Who 67
Uma Musume: From Beginner 130
Becoming a Horse Girl, I Will 85
Uma Musume: I Want All 105
I Can Copy Unique Skills 100
Summoning an Evil God, but the 70
Supernatural Multiverse 90
My Harem Is Indescribable 85
Jujutsu Kaisen: Heroic Spirit 90
"I'm just a Valkyrie passing through." 68
Uma Musume: Today Is Another Romantic Battlefield 81
Still playing traditional Honk 69
The Most Filial Son Under Heav 65
What Should I Do After Switchi - Volume2/3
Reincarnated as a Demon, Skill 60
Hell-Difficulty Dungeon? 55
Transmigrated as Sukuna 61
Checking In in Demon Slayer 65
The Reincarnating Trainer of Tracen Academy 80
I Refuse to Become a Heroic 66
My Best Friend Into a Slime? 58
A Saiyan Stands Above Marvel 65
What Do You Mean by Using a Lab Mod to Be the Hero? 63
Tanya Starts from Re:Zero 59
Why did they assign me to Uma 55
MYGO Beauties 56
DanMachi: Emiya the Giant Hero 45
The Gacha Merchant Who Started 49
My patreon : patreon.com/queen_sin
My patreon : patreon.com/queen_sin