"Pwah! Nothing beats starting the day with a drink or two!" Aqua exclaimed, wiping the foam from her mouth with the back of her hand.
"Actually, I think that's the worst possible way to start the day, but since the day started hours ago and it's already past noon, I guess it doesn't really matter," I said resignedly. "Can I ask what you've been doing until now?"
Aqua set the mug down on the table with a loud thunk. Her lips curved into a cheeky little smile.
"Oh? What's this? We do it a couple of times and now the little hikikomori thinks we're a couple or something? That's really cute, you know? Puuukusukusu!"
"I wasn't saying it like that," Aqua's comment annoyed me a little, but I didn't let it show. "We agreed to meet first thing in the morning to take on a high-level quest, remember?"
"Yeah, yeah, I know. But remember that besides going on quests with you to earn extra money and pay off my debts, I also have a party I belong to," Aqua replied, acting all high and mighty. "I'm a high-in-demand goddess! So it's only natural that I need to take some extra time off every now and then."
For some reason, it was almost impossible for me to imagine Aqua going that far when it came to completing quests. But I had to admit that belonging to two different parties must be pretty exhausting.
"And let's not even talk about how I also have to deal with your constant carnal urges every time those perverted hikikomori eyes of yours land on my divine body."
Ever since that day when Aqua showed up at the guild and we ended up fucking practically until nightfall, we had been regularly going out on some mid-level quests. In the worst cases, they only took us a couple of hours to complete. Thanks to my combat skills and Aqua's support magic, there were almost no monsters in the area that could stand up against me.
So as soon as we got back to the guild we'd order something to eat and then immediately head upstairs and spend the rest of the day having sex in one of the rooms.
Even the guild employee was so used to our routine that yesterday when I approached the counter, she gave me a shy smile and said, "Room number 2, right?"
I won't lie. Being able to have this goddess's body whenever I wanted, was without a doubt one of the best things that had happened to me since I arrived in this world.
If it were up to me, I'd be dragging her upstairs right now to make her mine once again. And we'd only stop to eat.
However, last time we decided we should slow down a bit with all that and focus on quests instead.
That Demon King wasn't going to defeat himself, after all.
"So, have you seen any quest that caught your eye?" Aqua asked while running a finger along the rim of her beer mug and then bringing it to her mouth for a lick.
I nodded.
"I've seen several. They all offer a more than generous reward. The problem is that the details seem a little confusing."
"What do you mean?"
"For example, one quest offers 10 million eris for venturing into the depths of a volcano and killing a flame dragon or something. So I assume it must use fire-type attacks."
"Oh! I didn't know you had such high intelligence, Kaizer!" the goddess exclaimed with clear sarcasm.
I shot her a "let me finish or I'm going to hit you" look and continued with my explanation.
"At the same time, there's also a quest posted by a craftsman in the city looking for someone who can get him a strange rock called kiritite."
"That doesn't sound too complicated," she pointed out.
"That's exactly what I thought. The only problem is that this stone can apparently only be found in an abandoned mine that adventurers practically don't go near. Because, it seems, the stone itself is guarded by a mysterious and powerful creature. So the quest would basically consist of killing said creature (whatever it is) and getting the kiritite for the craftsman. Just like the volcano quest, the reward is 10 million eris."
"It seems pretty simple. Or at least simpler than facing a fire dragon. I vote we do that one!" Aqua said. Her beautiful blue eyes sparkled with enthusiasm at the prospect of making easy money.
"Don't you realize?" I replied in a serious tone. "If the reward for getting that stone is the same as what they give us for killing a fire dragon, it can't be an easy quest."
And the worst part was that we didn't even know what we'd be facing. Because the quest description only said that the kiritite was protected by a "mysterious and powerful" creature.
At least with the volcano quest we already knew we'd be facing a fire dragon. So in that case you'd just have to find something to counter its flames and problem solved.
But a "mysterious and powerful" creature? Who knows what we might run into! What if it turned out to be something worse than a dragon?
It was true that Aqua's level was quite a bit higher than mine. But as an arch priestess, her skills were mainly focused on healing magic. She wouldn't be much help in a direct confrontation.
And the worst part was that most of the high-level quests were like that!
"Kill X powerful creature," "Obtain such-and-such object guarded by X powerful creature," etc.
No wonder no one took them.
"Well, what do you say we decide which quest to take while we eat something and have a beer?" Aqua suggested. She didn't seem to care much about our little predicament.
"Yeah. I guess that wouldn't be a problem," I looked her straight in the eyes. "As long as you pay with your own money."
The goddess shrank back in her seat and looked at me with pitiful puppy-dog eyes.
"Don't be like that, Kaizer. You know I'm broke. Besides, what's it to you?"
It costs me money.
"No way," I told her. "Besides, what did you do with the money we got from the last few quests we completed?"
"Weeeell…" Aqua's voice began to tremble as she nervously tapped her index fingers together. "I-I had to take care of some debts. M-Money I borrowed."
I can't believe it. This irresponsible goddess really was a disaster when it came to managing money!
She barely paid off one debt before she was already making another.
"In that case, I'm sorry to say you'll have to figure it out on your own," I said. My voice maybe a little colder and firmer than I would have liked. "Besides, I'm always the one inviting you to eat. If I keep this up, I'm going to end up broke myself."
At those words, the goddess's eyes began to water.
"Fine… fine… I understand…" she said between weak sobs.
"Aqua, look, I'm really sorry. But I think you need to start being more responsible with how you handle your money."
"It's fine, Kaizer," more sobs. "It's fine. Don't say anything else. After all, it's my fault for thinking we had something special. That we were friends."
"And of course we are, but—"
The words got stuck in my throat.
Wait. Friends? Was that really how I felt? Was that what I wanted? To be friends with Aqua?
"BUAAAAAAAAAAH!" Suddenly the aforementioned goddess burst into tears right in the middle of the guild. Several heads turned in our direction. "I… I thought… that we were… that we were friends! BUT I WAS WRONG!"
"Hey, don't cry. People are already looking at us again," I tried to calm her down, but it wasn't enough.
"AT THE END OF THE DAY, ONLY THING YOU CARE ABOUT IS MY BODY AND USING IT TO THE LIMIT TO COMMIT ALL KINDS OF DEPRAVED ACTS! BUAAAAH!! How stupid! How stupid I was!"
Oh my god! Not again!, I screamed internally while clutching my head in embarrassment. I wanted to hide under the table.
"There they go again," someone said.
"Taking advantage of a woman like that… that guy it's a scumbag," another person pointed out.
"I wonder how much more pleasure I have to give you before you'll be nice to me!" Aqua continued.
Damn treacherous, manipulative goddess. I'm sure if she dedicated herself to being an actress instead of an adventurer, she would have paid off her debts a long time ago.
Clearly, this wasn't going to stop. So before things got any worse and I ended up being lynched for being considered human scum, I sighed in resignation and accepted defeat.
"Fine," I said. "I'll buy you lunch today and a beer. But stop crying already, will you?"
"Thank you, Kaizer! You really are a good friend!" Aqua said, stopping her tantrum instantly.
She was calling me "friend" again. The idea itself didn't bother me, but for some reason it made me feel uncomfortable. Especially after everything we had been doing up until now. And I wasn't exactly referring to the quests.
While we waited for the waitress to bring our order, I couldn't stop turning the matter over in my head.
And the more I thought about it, the more convinced I became that "uncomfortable" wasn't the exact word to describe how it made me feel when Aqua referred to me as a friend. No. The idea didn't make me uncomfortable… it made me feel empty.
I don't want to be your friend, Aqua. What I want…
…
What do I want?
"Huh? Is something wrong?" she asked suddenly. Her eyebrows were slightly raised and her head was tilted to the side. Her elegant eyelashes blinked consecutively, giving her gaze a playful sparkle.
"No. I was just lost in thought," I shook my head.
Thinking. She repeated in confusion. "Thinking about what?"
"About the quests. I still can't decide which one we should take."
"Oh, right."
At that moment the waitress arrived with our order. She set down the two mugs of beer and the food I had ordered for Aqua — a juicy beef steak accompanied by baked potatoes.
I quickly picked up my beer and took a sip. For some reason I couldn't bring myself to look Aqua in the eyes.
The beer was a bit bitter for my taste, but nice and cold. The feeling of that bubbly liquid sliding down my throat was like a refreshing icy caress.
When I looked up, I saw Aqua staring at me. Her lips curved into a cocky smile.
"Hehehe."
"And now what's wrong with you?"
"Me? Nothing's wrong with me, Kaizer. I was just wondering if you were telling the truth when you said you were thinking about the quests."
"Of course I was. What else would I be thinking about?"
"You know—" she began, leaning forward as if she was about to reveal a big secret. "We gods have the ability to know when someone is lying to us."
"WHAT?"
Seeing my look of absolute panic and terror, she burst out laughing.
"You should have seen your face! Puukusukusu!"
"You're an idiot."
"Huh? Can I ask what kind of way that is to treat your goddess, you inconsiderate hikikomori? I demand compensation!" She took a long drink of her beer and then slammed the mug down on the table, spilling a bit of the contents over the sides.
"The way you deserve to be treated. Wait, did you say 'your goddess'? Can I ask since when you became my goddess?"
"Let's leave that for later. The way you reacted when I said I could tell when you were lying makes it obvious you weren't being honest when you said you were thinking about the quests. Or am I wrong?"
"And what if I was lying?" No matter what, I couldn't let her corner me. "Just because we're party members doesn't mean I have to tell you everything I'm thinking. I could have been coming up with some strategy to defeat the mysterious monster in the mine."
Aqua took another sip of her beer and smiled again. She leaned her body a little more forward, resting her chin on her right hand.
"You know what I think?"
"W-What?" I was starting to blush.
"That you were thinking about doing perverted things," she whispered. "Sexual things…"
"OF COURSE NOT!"
I shouted so loudly that practically everyone present turned toward our table.
"Fine, fine. I understand. You've satisfied your carnal appetite with this divine body and now you can't think about anything else. Poor little Kaizer."
This woman really had a divine gift… but for driving me crazy! She thinks she's so great just because her body is kind of irresistible to me and my dick gets hard just from looking at her. Aaargh! And the worst part is that she's right. However, that wasn't what I was thinking about this time.
I was about to tell her that when suddenly a man approached our table.
Both Aqua and I stopped our conversation to pay attention to the newcomer.
Judging by his appearance, he looked like a noble. Or at least someone with a lot of money. He was wearing a formal black suit, white gloves, and a top hat.
Judging by his thick mustache, which was slowly starting to turn white, I'd say he was in his fifties.
"Ah! I've finally found you, young man!" the man exclaimed.
"Excuse me? Do I know you?"
"No, not at all. But that's beside the point! I know who you are, as well as this young lady sitting here, and that's all that matters."
Great. It seemed that thanks to Aqua the rumors that I was a pervert had spread like wildfire and now this wealthy man had come to use his influence to throw me in prison. Or something worse.
"Look, sir," I began in my most polite tone, "I don't know what things you may have heard about me, but I assure you it's all a misunderstanding."
Partly.
"A misunderstanding, you say?" the noble replied with a furrowed brow. "Aren't you the heroes who saved this city from the Giant Toad King and Queen?"
"Well, if you mean that…" I began. Even the term "heroes" felt a bit extreme. It hadn't been that big a deal.
"Furthermore, I understand that the skilled arch priestess here was the key piece in the defeat of Beldia."
At the mention of the incident with the Demon King's general, Aqua's cheeks flushed and she quickly looked away in embarrassment.
Whether the man was omitting the details out of courtesy or simply didn't know the full story, the truth was that during that battle Aqua had caused more destruction than Beldia himself. So it was understandable that being reminded of all that wasn't exactly pleasant for her.
However, that wasn't the most important thing right now.
If this man wasn't here to cause trouble, then why had he come?
Without beating around the bush, I asked him, and the answer I received left me more than surprised.
"I've come to request your help, young adventurers! I'm desperate!"
"What exactly do you need from us?" Aqua asked, sharing my curiosity.
"My daughter has been kidnapped by a demon!" the man exclaimed. "And I'm willing to pay two million eris to whoever can bring her back to me!"
"EEEEEEEEEEHH!" Aqua and I screamed in unison, shaking the walls of the guild.