I have finally arrived at Rajasthan. Yes, it was a long and peaceful journey… or not…
The current scene was that a bull was running. A dog, then me and then a policeman was sitting on top of that bull. And we were chased by my mom's slipper, which was spinning like crazy and flying around following us.
Yash:
FLASHBACK
I arrived at the airport and was standing dazed and with a tensed expression. I opened my suitcase and started throwing all stuff out while looking for something.
Yash: [Tensed] Where is it? Damn it!
The people around me looked at me with a troubled and worrying expression. Finally, I found what I was looking for.
Yash: [Relaxed] Hah! Found it!
I took out a lollypop and ate it and stood with a proud expression on my face. The public fell down. Then I packed my stuff back and looked around.
Yash: Where did that antique beauty went off to?
I was talking about the girl who was my seat partner in the plane. I didn't saw her but I spotted another beauty.
Yash: Well, well. It doesn't matter. Let's follow that one!
I took my bag and went behind her. A little while later, I saw another beauty who was coming towards us. I then turned around and started following her. Then again, I spotted another girl and changed my steps. Suddenly, in accidentally stepped on a dog's tail. That guy was now angry and chased me down. I was yelling and running with my bags. I and the dog were running on the main road and then… a policeman saw us and was now chasing after us. The dog was running forward, followed by me and we both were being chased by the angry policeman. But it doesn't end here. We accidentally collided with a bull. That thing was now chasing us. The policeman was running now in the 1st place, while I was in the 2nd and the dog was in the 3rd place and we all were being followed by the bull. We were putting quite the show.
Yash: [Running] What the fuck's going on?
Dog: [Running] Bow vow! Bow vow!
Policeman: [Running] Which star were you born under, kid?
Yash: [Running] It's not a star's fault. This runs in our bloodline, and it comes majorly from my mom.
The next second, the slipper was coming towards us and on the following scene, we ended up in the current situation. Somehow, I managed to survive out of this. The bull's owner showed up and stopped him. The policeman scolded me and the dog for causing this shit around the city, and by the way, we were in Jaipur. I and the dog shook hands while feeling proud of our achievements. Then I went to a park nearby and drank a little water and sat on a bench to rest.
Yash: What a mess. How could Mom's slipper follow us here and then went back too? What is she, a magician? What should I do about staying tonight? Hold on a sec… since mom can do magic by throwing her slipper, maybe… [Excited] …maybe I'm a magician too! Let's try!
I took out my shoes and threw it, but it fell a little far and stopped. I got disappointed. Then the dog from before came and picked my shoe in his mouth and ran away.
Yash: [Tensed] Awaa! Come back, you basted dog. Give my shoe back!
I took my bag and started running again. I followed it and after a brief marathon, he put my shoe away and ran. I picked my shoe and sat down, all out of breath.
Yash: [Red faced] Haah! Haah! Damn doggy!
Then I realised that my shoe was filled with the dog's saliva. I look at it with disgusted eyes and then I looked around me. There were girls. Beautiful girls. Well, mostly girls… Umm... Damn. THERE WERE ONLY GIRLS!!! One of the girl went inside running and the rest were whispering "Is he a pervert?"
Why? Why is my life so damned?! Then a mid aged and beautiful lady came out. She walked to me as I stood up.
Yash: Err… listen ma'am. I… I didn't intend to come with any wrong purpose. I just… was chasing a dog who stole my shoe and…
She was walking towards me with scary eyes. Her glasses were making it hard for me to even see her eyes. She bought both of her hands forward towards me and…
Yash: [Scared] …I… I… EEPP!!!
She caught me and hugged me.
Lady: [Happily] Hey, Yash! You sure have grown up! How was your journey? Did you get tired?
Yash: [Confused] What?
Lady: You could have just given me a call and I would have come to pick you up.
Yash: [Confused] Wait… do I know you?
Lady: You forgot me… how could you? It's me! Aunt Jelly! Your mom's friend! Shizuka Jelly!
Yash: Hold on! You are the principal of Double Dot School and you send that letter to us?
Jelly: Yes. Your mom suddenly got in contact with me 2 days ago and asked me to admit you. I was so happy to help and I was wanting to meet you myself. So, welcome!
Yash: Wow, so the doggy actually bought me to the right place, huh? Is it the school?
Jelly: The hostel for girls. You sure found your way.
She giggled.
Yash: Um… I didn't come here intentionally.
Jelly: Yeah, Yeah. I know. So, you have a place to stay?
Yash: Err… not yet.
Jelly: Figured. How about you stay in store room for today? I know its rude but for now I can't get any better thing. Sorry!
She joined here hands and apologised. The face she made was such a cute one that my face blushed a little.
Yash: No, that's very kind of you.
Jelly: Great! You can eat at the mess for today.
Yash: [Bowing] Thank you so much. I appreciate that.
Then she took me to the room. Actually, it was the store room, but it was damn clean.
I spent my day there for the night. It was Sunday now. I woke up at 5:00 AM. Actually, I couldn't sleep because of the spiders behind the shelves. They were as big as a boulder. My heart was racing so fast that it looked like I was going to die just from over blood flow. I thought that it was a clean place but that was just for show. Well, I can't complain though. I then took a bath and now was ready. We all ate our breakfast at the mess.
Jelly: Yash, I've called Raghav. A student from our school. He will show you around. Be sure to buy every essential for the school.
Yash: Alright. When will he arrive?
Jelly: Hmm. He should arrive in 10 minutes. Wait at the gate. He is a very nice and friendly guy.
Then I waited at the gate, and after a little while, a boy came on Ducati X-Diavel S. A bike worth 31,00,000 Rupees. It was highly modified too. A guy rich and good-looking. Then he walked inside.
Yash:
Two girls came running at him.
Yash:
The girls reached him and then slapped him on both his cheeks at the same time. I got startled.
Girl 1: Bastard!
Girl 2: Go Die!
Then the two of them ran back at the hostel. I walked to that guy.
Yash: Hey… you okay?
Raghav: Yeah. I'm used to it.
Yash: Why did they hit you?
Raghav: If you tell a girl's brother about that girl and her boyfriend, then what will that girl do to you?
Yash: Slap me, of course.
Raghav: So, was I just worshipped or something?
Yash: No. But why did you tell her brother about her boyfriend?
Raghav: Because she was trying to double cross me with her boyfriend.
Yash: And what about the other girl? Why did she hit you?
Raghav: Because the boyfriend guy who was beaten was her brother.
Yash: And where is that boy now?
Raghav: Come, I'll show you.
We both went to a hospital. At the 5th floor… There were 5 patients in the room. He pointed to a guy on the last bed. That guy was completely fine. Well… except his penis which was covered in bandages and was standing with the support of a stick.
Yash: [Tensed] Wh-What the fuck happened to him?
We walked to him. He was sleeping.
Raghav: The girl's brother ran a road roller on his sausage and eggs. His balls are now flat disk.
Yash: B-But how is that possible? His whole body is without any damage, then how come only his balls and junk are squashed?
Raghav: I'm thinking the exact same thing.
Then a nurse came from behind and hit Raghav on his head and pushed him. Why? Because he was standing in the middle of the hall.
Yash: Now why did she hit you?
Raghav got confused and then snapped his finger. A man in black suit broke the window and stood near him. That man was his bodyguard, Andrew. I got surprised and fell down.
Raghav: Andrew, the mini book of hisab!
That guy handed him a small notebook. Raghav checked its pages but then closed the book. I stood up.
Raghav: There's no entry of this. Why did the nurse hit me? Andrew, go and give a stick in her ass!
Andrew: Okay sir. But stick?
Raghav: [To me] You have a stick?
I took the stick which was supporting the other guy's penis and gave it to Raghav, who passed it to Andrew. Andrew then went for his mission.
Yash: What is this book anyways?
Raghav: Oh, this? I have done many things which makes people hold a grudge against me. Its impossible to remember every one of them, so I have maintained a book. This is the mini version of it.
Yash: What are you?
Then Andrew returned. His hand was a little bloody. We also heard screams from inside the other room. It was obvious who they belonged to. Also, the boy with the broken penis woke up and now, since I took his supporting stick, he was also yelling in pain. The doctors came running.
Doctor: What happened? What happened?
Raghav: [Innocently] I don't know.
Yash: [Whispering to him] He's yelling because we took his stick. And the nurse is yelling because your bodyguard gave that stick in her ass!
Raghav: Really? That stick? [To Andrew] Go bring that stick back.
Andrew: Yes sir!
I stopped him.
Yash: Don't be stupid. That stick will come out in the morning. Let's get out of here.
Andrew then jumped off from broken window and disappeared.
Yash: A ninja?!!
We both then went out.
Raghav: Well, that was fun. Now, for the intro. My name is Raghav Gupta. I'm a second-year student in Double Dot high-school. You can say that I'm in class 11th.
Yash: Nice to meet you. I am Yashvardhan Saini, and I'll be studying in 11th class too.
Raghav: You are from a middle-class family, right? How the hell did you managed to get in Double Dot?
Yash: Aunt Jelly and my mom have been long friends. So, my mom asked her to take me in this school.
Raghav: That's lucky. This school is only for rich and prodigy students. I can bet that you won't survive in this school. The students are very egoistic and they look down on each other. You are a middle-class guy. You will be their primary target. You are like a bug to them.
Yash: Then how are you so different?
Raghav: I'm no different either. I think of you as an insect too.
Yash: Thanks a lot. -_-
Raghav: But, I have agreed to help Principal Jelly for a favour that she did. I kind of owe her, so its just for the repayment of that. As soon as my work is done, we won't see each other again. You understand?
Yash: Yeah, Yeah. I get it. You all rich people are egoistic and mean. Let's get this over with.
We both reached a hi-fi cloth store. Inside…
Raghav: Hello uncle.
Shopkeeper: Huh? Oh, Mr. Raghav. How may I assist you?
Raghav: We need a dress for Double Dot school. For this guy here.
The shopkeeper looked at me and then took my measurements. Then he gave me my dress. It was black coat, black jeans, white shirt and a black tie. He then bought some black shoes too.
Shopkeeper: The total is 5000 rupees.
Yash: 5000?
Raghav: What? Don't tell me you don't have money!
Yash: Who do you think I am? [Thinks a little] [To shopkeeper] How about I exchange it for porn DVD of highest quality?
Raghav: Those things won't wor…
The shopkeeper puts his hand on Raghav's Shoulder.
Shopkeeper: [To me] Sir, you want it gift wrapped or should I deliver it to your home?
Raghav: What?
He looks at me and the shopkeeper idiotically. I then payed for the dress with 3 DVD. Then we both left the store, and I went to buy a lollipop and Raghav went to get the bike. He stumbled upon a familiar person.
Raghav: Oh, Hi Priya!
Priya: Who're you?
She said that very coldly. She was the girl who sat beside me in the plane. This girl is another Rich and a student of Double Dot school. She is in the same class as well.
Raghav: [Nervously] Isn't that funny, Hehehe! We are studying together for almost 8 years now! You really don't know me? I mean, C'mon! I'm Raghav!
Priya: [Thinking] Raghav? You're in my class? Oh, so you're that social insect, huh?
Raghav: [Teary eyes] Insect? Uhuu! I'm social beetle.
Priya: It doesn't matter. I can't possibly remember the name of every maggot who crosses my way. Now get out of my sight.
As she was about to go, I came.
Yash: I got 10 lollipops for 40 rupees! Yay!
Then I saw that beautiful girl. Now, about my mind… Since I slept, ate and stayed at the girls' hostel for half a day, and saw so many beautiful girls in Jaipur, I now had no sudden urge of following girls or to suddenly spot a girl. This phenomenon is the same as when you spray some deo on yourself. You smell it for a little while but after that it fades for you because you get used to it. But when others get close to you, they can smell its faint scent. Anyways… its effect was… I completely ignored that girl.
Priya: [Angrily] YOU!?? YOU BEAST!!!
Yash: [Looks at her] Huh? Who're you?
Instant Karma!
She was in a different dress and was wearing glasses. Her hairs were differently styled too. The result…
Priya: Wha? How could you not know me, you asshole!
She took off her sunglasses.
Yash: You?! Pendrive thief?! Give me my pendrive back!
Raghav: [Surprised] What? Itni Ameer hoke pendrive churati hai?
She slapped both of us.
Priya: Shut up! I don't want to waste my time and energy on you low lives. Why are you following me?
Yash: I'm not following you. I'm here to buy my own school dress and other stuff.
Raghav: He's in our school not to mention in the same class too.
Priya: What?! Our school have a 'Gareeb Quota' Too?! (For Me)
Raghav: [Acting] Once upon a time, his mother and our principal is phiriend (Friend). They both decided to admit his in our school. That's why he is here. Thank you. Dhanyawad.
We both looked at him idiotically.
Yash: Dude, you know English too?! Here is your reward!
I took out the lollipop from my mouth and passed at him.
Raghav: Uh… no thanks.
Priya: Go to hell. You're wasting my time.
She then left.
Raghav: Bro, I am her classmate for the last 8 years, yet she doesn't know me. What did you do to her that she recognised you instantly?
Yash: Well, it's a long story.
Raghav: Do you have any idea who she is? She is Priya! Priya Choudhary! The daughter and sole heir to the richest man of Jaipur. She is called the 'Violent Beauty' in our school.
Yash: What's with that weird sounding title?
Raghav: Our school have a title for each student. I have some too, like 'The Social Beetle', 'Ducati Boy', 'Chameleon Boy' etc.
Yash: So, what?
Raghav: The top title is given at the end of the year. This ranking system is done on the basis of various activities throughout the year. That girl, Priya… she is the 2nd best girl in our grade and possibly in the top 10 of our school.
Yash: Is that so? Well, it doesn't matter, does it? Let's just go the next place.
Raghav: You are so simple minded. This is a big deal! Well, whatever. You'll be expelled soon anyways. Let's just go.
Then we went to a 5-star hotel. It was a really big building. A very fancy looking too.
Yash: [Sparkly eyes] Whoa! This is one lovely hostel for boys.
Raghav: You motherfucker, the hostel is behind this.
We went behind the hotel. There was a very old, crappy and dark mansion. A haunted house behind that building.
Yash: [Scared] What the fuck is this?!
Raghav: [Broad Smile] Boys hostel!
Yash: This is boys hostel? Isn't it called a haunted house!?
Raghav: C'mon! There is nothing haunted about this place. Once, a party was organised here and 50 peoples were found unconscious here.
Yash: Unconscious? Well, that's reassuring.
Raghav: [Casually] Rest 200 were found dead.
Yash: [Scared] WHAT?! I'm not living here!
Then I saw a witch in a white dress, dancing on the roof while looking and smiling wickedly at me.
Yash: [Scared as hell] See! See! That witch looks like she's gonna fucking eat me! Argh! I'm not going!
Raghav: Well, that's none of my concern. My work was to drop you here and that is completed now. See ya, if you managed to stay alive, that is. Hope we never meet again. HAHAHAHA!
This bastard speeded off on his bike while I looked at his back idiotically.
Now what? I'm left with nowhere to go. Let's just get in. I then entered inside. My legs were shaking. Suddenly, a woman's laugh startled me. I walked on the creaking floor and reached in the middle of the hall. Suddenly, the laugh changed into scream and cry. I stopped and looked around. I then put down my suitcase and opened it. Then I took out a porn DVD and held high in my hand. A bright light shined on me. I then closed my eyes in a praying stance.
Yash: Jai Johnny baba! Jai Mia Khalifa! Jai Porn ke Bhagwan! Give me strength to overcome this trial! Jai God of Porn!
I then opened my eyes and got startled. 3 Ghosts were in front of me, drooling like a dog with their tongues sticking out.
Ghosts: Porn! Porn! Porn! Porn!
Yash: [Surprised] Aunty, you watch porn too?
One ghost was a woman and the 2 others were male. Their age was 27, 29 and 13 years respectively. One of them was just a kid.
Aunty Ghost: What do you mean? I was the one who taught these two how to see porn videos using VPN.
Yash: [Shocked] Wha-? [To Males] And who are you?!
Both: We live here as well. Enough with the intro! Let's watch!!!
Yash: But I don't have a DVD player. How will we watch?
The Aunty ghost suddenly carried a 108-inch OLED TV. The Uncle ghost bought a big sofa, which could convert into a bed too, had digital controls with a digital screen and was very soft and had massagers too. The kid bought a DVD Player and many snacks to eat too.
I got surprised.
Yash: [Surprised] You ghosts are filthy rich! Damn! If you are so rich, then why don't you buy porn DVDs too?
Uncle Ghost: There is no seller of Porn DVD in Jaipur.
Yash: What?! [Sparkling] My business has scope here!!!
The kid and Aunty settled up the whole connections.
Yash: Wait, how will we power them up? Is there an electricity connection here?
The ghosts looked at each other with a blank face.
Yash: *Sigh* I knew it.
Kid Ghost: No worries! Let's watch in this.
He bought a Mac book pro from under a crappy looking sofa.
Yash: [Stunned] Fuck! You guys are too damn rich!!!
Then we watched porn for the whole night.
At last… I have a home to live in and there is no tension of thieves or any other kind of accident.
Why?
Because I live in a Haunted House.
Chapter 4 – The Haunted House RUCKUS
*ENDS*
Next time: Chapter 5 – The School RUCKUS