Chapter 229: How Many Times Do I Have to Say It? Call Me by My Title During Work
"Tsk, tsk, tsk."
Rekka clicked his tongue, slowly shaking his head with a look of deep disappointment. "You only lasted fourteen seconds. You couldn't even make it past the thirty-second mark."
Across from him, the Research Ape was drenched in cold sweat. The primate's fur stood on end, its eyes darting around in absolute panic.
"You... what kind of banana are you?!" the ape stammered, pointing a trembling finger at the teenager. "Why does the meme virus have absolutely no effect on you?!"
"The reason is incredibly simple: I spent about twenty minutes cracking the meme's underlying logic," Rekka answered naturally, brushing a speck of dust from his shoulder. "I'll admit, the construct is quite interesting. It took a little bit of my time earlier, and it did make my head spin for a moment yesterday. You didn't code this yourself, did you? It has Dr. Primitive's fingerprints all over it. However, while your graduation project theoretically passes the technical requirements, your ethics score is a flat negative."
"My... ethics score is a negative...?"
The Research Ape's lips quivered. It was entirely unclear whether the primate was vibrating out of sheer terror or boiling indignation. Finally, it snapped. "Damn it! You... you... you un-banana-believable bad student!"
"Well then, did you know?" Rekka smiled, a dangerously bright expression spreading across his face. "Bad students specialize in beating up their teachers."
"What—wait, what are you going to do?!"
"Trying to log off? No way."
Rekka casually reached a hand into the empty air. A glowing red pop-up window materialized directly in front of the Research Ape, flashing a harsh `[ACCESS DENIED]` warning. Back when he was grinding through the Aetherium Wars tournament, Rekka had picked up a few introductory Aether Editing tricks from Silver Wolf. After some trial and error, he had figured out the basics. He was nowhere near the hacker's god-like level, but for trapping a panicked monkey in a virtual space? It was more than enough.
"Mr. Gorilla, I think you might have severely misjudged the power gap between us." Rekka raised a single, mocking eyebrow.
Behind him, the shadows shifted as the crew stepped forward. Stelle rhythmically tapped her baseball bat against her open palm, the metal producing a dull, threatening thwack. Rozaliya and Liliya flanked her, each dragging a massive greatsword that scraped ominously against the floor. Dan Heng silently adjusted his grip on Cloud-Piercer, his expression entirely devoid of mercy.
And then there was March 7th. The usually cheerful archer was currently hefting a custom-made, oversized sledgehammer forged entirely out of Six-Phased Ice. It was larger than she was, radiating a freezing mist that chilled the room. Clearly, the girl was absolutely furious.
Rekka stepped aside, gesturing to the heavily armed lineup like a game show host. "Now, use that clever primate brain of yours to guess which weapon we're going to use to beat you."
The ape swallowed hard, its eyes glued to the glowing weapons. "...T-The bat?"
"No, no, no, no, no!" Rekka wagged his finger.
"T-The hammer?!"
"No, no, no, no, no!"
"C-Could it be... both at once?"
"No, no, no, no, no!"
The monkey fell to its knees, clutching its head in despair. "N-No way... you're going to use all of them..."
"Yes, yes, yes, yes!—YES!"
Bam! Pow! Crack! Boom! Boom! Boom!
"Agh! Ow! It hurts so much! Banana! Ow, ow, ow! Help! The bad student is beating the Banana Professor!"
Accompanied by a chaotic display of exaggerated, cartoonish screams, the Banana Professor's true form within the dreamscape was subjected to a relentless, merciless barrage of punches, kicks, slashes, and blunt-force trauma.
Rekka calmly stepped away from the dust cloud of violence, walking over to a nearby counter to mix himself a special iced drink.
"Ultimate Kill!" Stelle shouted, swinging her bat like she was aiming for the bleachers.
"Dora, dora, dora, dora!" the twins chanted in unison, bringing their greatswords down in a synchronized blur of destruction.
The group proceeded to ruthlessly trample the monkey into the floorboards.
"Hold still, old man. I'm here to walk on your back," Stelle offered helpfully, proving she was still a grandmaster in the ancient domain of back-trampling.
Not wanting to be left out of the medical assistance, Rekka walked over, effortlessly dismantled the heavy oak door of the President's office from its hinges, and slammed it flat onto the monkey's back. He stood on top of it, effectively curing the primate's hunchback through sheer gravitational force.
Truly a miraculous cure. The doctor was in.
The high-intensity team fight continued for a few more minutes until the dust finally settled.
"Throw him into the Sea of Quanta later," Rekka instructed casually, stepping off the door and hauling it back up to reinstall it on its hinges. For a guy like this, whether his physical body or his digitized consciousness was tossed into the Sea of Quanta, the end result would be exactly the same.
Dusting off his hands, Rekka walked over to the grand leather chair behind the President's desk and sat down. He adjusted his posture, sitting perfectly upright, and crossed his hands on the polished mahogany surface. His expression shifted into one of absolute, stony seriousness, looking every bit like he had owned the university for decades.
He reached into his pocket, pulled out a custom-made brass nameplate, and set it on the desk. It read: `[Acting President · Rekka]`.
March 7th immediately trotted over, standing at attention beside his chair with a professional smile.
The newly reinstalled door swung open, and Welt and Himeko walked in.
"Please state your business here," March chirped.
"Rekka, what are you..." Welt started, blinking at the bizarre scene.
"Hello to you both, but it is currently working hours," Rekka interrupted, his face remaining entirely stern. "Please refer to me by my proper title."
Himeko covered her mouth, unable to hold back a soft laugh. "When exactly did you become the President of Origami University?"
"This isn't funny." Rekka maintained his deadpan glare.
"Alright then, Mr. President," Himeko played along, her eyes crinkling with amusement. "The Trailblaze academic seminar has concluded. How are your credits looking?"
"I am the President. I do not need credits." The corners of Rekka's mouth twitched upward just a fraction.
"And I am the President's secretary! I don't need credits either," March 7th added, sticking her tongue out playfully.
Welt stared at them in absolute silence.
He actually found a loophole to skip class, the former Herrscher thought, rubbing his temples.
"Because Professor Primon spread meme viruses and actively endangered campus safety during his tenure, he has been officially dismissed and is currently under investigation," Rekka declared, tapping a pen against the desk.
"How come I didn't hear any news about this?" Welt asked.
"Because I threw him into the Sea of Quanta first," Rekka answered flatly.
"...What did you just say you did?" Welt's eyes gradually widened behind his glasses. What in the world is this kid doing?
"Yada yada, wabi babu, zip zap..." Rekka launched into a rapid-fire, heavily abridged explanation of the entire ordeal, summarizing the complex memetic conspiracy with a series of hand gestures and cartoonish sound effects.
Himeko's smile faded, her expression turning serious. "Dr. Primitive's henchmen are actually operating inside Origami University?"
"And now?" Welt asked, his tone sharpening.
"Rest assured, the meme viruses and Dr. Primitive's little claws have all been thoroughly dealt with by yours truly." Rekka leaned back in the leather chair, looking entirely too comfortable. "Mr. Welt, if you wish to know the specific structural details of the memetic virus, I have already drafted a complete paper on the subject. You can take a look." He slid a thick stack of neatly printed documents across the desk.
Welt picked it up, skimming the highly advanced theoretical physics and memetic coding on the first page. "When did you write this?"
"I just wrote it in passing during one system hour."
Welt sighed internally. This is bad. The kid is aligned with the Erudition Path today. Writing a post-graduate thesis really isn't difficult for him right now.
Just then, a translucent figure phased into the room. "Mr. President, here is the current status of the students' homework completion."
"Thank you very much, Mr. Rick." Rekka stood up and formally shook hands with the Memokeeper, who bowed slightly before departing through the wall.
"By the way, Mr. Welt, Ms. Himeko," Rekka said, sitting back down. "Two more geniuses will be arriving here shortly."
"Geniuses?" Himeko asked.
"Yes. Herta and Screwllum are on their way."
It was all because of a former Genius Society member named Chadwick, the man who possessed the blueprints for a super-weapon known as the Imaginary Collapse Pulse. It was an anti-galaxy weapon capable of being fired multiple times consecutively, and terrifyingly, its manufacturing cost wasn't even that exaggerated.
After the weapon's initial deployment caused an unmatched cosmic disaster, a morally tormented Chadwick resolved to protect its secrets with his life, resisting the ambitions of the IPC and anyone else with ill intent. To achieve this, he had requested Screwllum to procure a specialized drug that could selectively block and lock away specific parts of his consciousness and memory. The real-world Chadwick had passed away long ago; the entity currently residing in Penacony's dreamscape was merely a fragmented piece of extracted Memoria.
If Rekka hadn't bumped into the man during the earlier Genius Society meeting, he would have completely forgotten that a hidden genius was tucked away in this dream bubble.
"How much longer do you plan to remain as this Acting President?" Himeko asked, her smile returning.
Honestly, having a hyper-intelligent Erudition-Path Rekka sitting in the President's seat to handle the official liaison work was far better than letting the clueless university staff deal with Herta's notorious temper.
Rekka picked up the official university seal, placed it neatly into the top drawer, and rested his chin on his crossed hands, striking a flawless, cinematic big-shot pose. The lighting in the room practically shifted to highlight his dramatic angle.
"I'm going to make Origami University great again."
"You only became President so you could say that exact line, didn't you?" President's Secretary March 7th ruthlessly exposed him from the sidelines.
Rekka nodded without a shred of shame.
Shaking his head at the absurdity of it all, Welt stepped back and leaned his weight against the heavy oak door.
With a loud, echoing thud, the unhinged door gave way entirely, sending the mature, mecha-loving senior Trailblazer falling flat on his back into the hallway.
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