"This tastes like shit," Caellum muttered as he sipped the flagon of weak ale while poking around the food on his plate.
After weeks of eating the immaculately seasoned but most likely poisoned, freshly cooked but definitely poisoned meals made with the castle's finest ingredients and hand-delivered by Yaga, Caellum had to admit that his taste buds were now accustomed to the finer things in life and could no longer tolerate poor man's fare.
Not that this food was anything to boast about.
As Caellum glanced down at the unidentifiable greenish-blackish concoction over slimy mashed potatoes that was supposed to be some form of seafood stew, he quickly slid it over to Urch since his appetite was long gone.
"Mmpgh?" Urch froze while devouring his food, staring at Caellum with wide eyes.
"Eat it."
"Mmpgh, cough, cough, are you sure youn- urm sir?" Urch asked, scarfing down the food on his own plate with a savagery usually seen only in animals.
"Very."
Just the fishy smell alone was enough to turn him off, plus with the standard of cleanliness of the place…
Caellum glanced around at the interior of the tavern located by the ship yards and the entrance to the slums, taking in the…unique atmosphere.
Grimy tables that clearly hadn't seen soap and water in months.
A floor that was in love with dust, dirt, mud, and strange-smelling liquids, while clearly being allergic to a mop.
Grimy sailors and laborers fresh off work, eating at various tables, splashing everything from ale to spit to food all around, while talking loudly to each other.
Servers and bar workers with dirt crusted underneath their nails and an interesting…odor wafting around their bodies as they walked around.
Although he usually wasn't one to be picky, there was no way he could eat the food here.
At least with Yaga, he was assured of the quality of the poison that might be used on him.
With the queen, he'd already eaten her poison once, and although it made him sick, he didn't die from it.
If he ate here, though, Caellum wasn't sure what would hit his system, and what additional disease would come with it.
He just sat in his corner with Urch, sipped the ale in the flagon while occasionally dumping some on himself as if he were drunk, as he listened to the conversations around him.
What he was looking for was information from the locals.
Ignoring the occasional looks in his direction, Caellum focused on getting drunk while pinching himself to awaken his dried-up tear ducts, as he eavesdropped.
"Did you hear that the Velvet Tunnel got some new girls?"
"Yeah? I might have a go later, you know the old miss has been stiffing me since the seamstress girl popped out with a kid she claims is mine."
"Well, is it?"
"With these handsome looks of mine, why don't you guess?"
Nope, not that one.
Next.
"Captain said we needed to hire more mercenaries for the ship this time around because those pirates are getting more active."
"Why doesn't he hire mages, pttew?"
"With what money? He's already skimping on our wages. Besides, those desert mage bastards charge and arm and a leg and never want to leave their holy land."
"Tsk. The fact that we have to depend on them is terrible. What is the royal family doing-"
Well, the royal family's queen is childishly poisoning the youngest child while the king is flirting with his favorite concubine and trying to put that concubine's child on the throne.
Also, it seems people feel a bit bitter toward Qasmira and their mages?
Interesting but not particularly useful except for getting an idea of where to look into hiring people.
Next.
"I may have lost yesterday's wages gambling at Silver Scales. I'll definitely get it back today! And even double it!"
"Give up. Each time you go, they fleece you for everything you own."
"But I'm so close! You saw that I was on a winning streak before I lost it all! I'll stop this time-"
A gambling den called Silver Scales? He definitely needed to visit it.
On another note, there were quite a few places that used silver in their names in this city.
Argent at the bank, Silver at a gambling den.
It would be good to note it and possibly dig into it in the future, though it wouldn't be surprising if the bank was running both.
After all, getting people addicted to gambling and then passing that debt to the bank was the perfect way to string somebody along forever.
Next.
"…are you going to the fighting pits tonight?"
"Yeah, I heard that a new batch of fresh meat got delivered and they're restarting the tourney. I need to get my bets in soon. I heard someone made a killing on the last one."
"Argh, is it those rigged battles they had last time? As soon as their champion got a scratch, they ended things."
"No. I heard it's full blood this time. No stops. No rules. To the death."
A fighting ring? A tourney? To the death?
Perfect.
Let's go take a look.
If there's one thing I'm confident about, it's betting.
As the men continued to discuss, Caellum subtly kicked a sleepy-looking Urch to get his attention.
As the young boy blinked, Caellum leaned over and whispered in his ear.
"Go pull the carriage to the side and wait inside for me to come out."
"Yes, sir."
As Urch got to his feet and quickly scrambled out of the bar, deftly weaving around the rowdy tables, Caellum dragged his seat over to the discussing men and interrupted their conversation.
"Gentlemen, hic, I heard you discussing something quite interesting. Please tell me more."
"Who the hell are you-"
"Yeah, who the hell are you, pretty boy? Get out of here."
The two men, both stocky with full beards and stained clothes, glared at the handsome young man who was intruding on their conversations.
"A soon-to-be friend and somebody looking to have some fun and get into a little trouble." Caellum smiled drunkenly as he flagged one of the servers and flipped a coin, "Pretty lady, two pitchers of the finest ale for my two friends here, and get them the best quality snacks you have as well. Keep the change."
"Sure thing, handsome. Let me know if you want something a little extra as well." The server, a bosom blonde, blew him a kiss before tucking the coin in her exposed cleavage, heading to the bar, and quickly returning with two overflowing pitchers of amber liquid and what looked like turkey legs and fried fish covered in that strange green concoction.
As the two men stared at the surplus of food and drink that suddenly appeared before them, Caellum lifted his tankard toward them.
"Cheers, hic. To new friends. Hic."
"Ahem. Friends, that's right. This is how you treat your friends."
"Right. Friends."
Caellum sloppily clanked his tankard against theirs before pretending to take a sip as the two men began digging into the food.
After allowing them a couple of bites, he began weaving his story.
"Well, my new friends, I couldn't help overhear you all talking about something fun. You said fights? Real fights?"
"Yeah, that's right."
"And what about it? What's it to you?"
Although they were enjoying the food and drink offering Caellum had bought them, the two men were still warily watching him.
After all, compared to the others, he still looked a touch fancy in his proper clothes, clean, pale skin, and relatively uncalloused hands, as if he hadn't done a day of hard labor in his life.
"I want to go. I want to see it with my own eyes," Caellum muttered honestly, doing his best to sound desperate.
"Why does a prissy boy like you want to go?"
"You're not one of those, those - secret guards are ya? Trying to raid and set us up?"
The two men looked at Caellum with even more suspicion.
Although he looked a bit bookish and weak, what if it was just a front?
"Psh me? Look at how weak I am. Seriously, touch my arms. Go for it! Feel it hic!"
As Caellum held out his arm, flexing with all of his might, the man sitting to his left squeezed it with his greasy hands, immediately compressing what little muscular lift there was down to the bone.
His fingers easily wrapped around the thickest part of Caellum's arm with room to spare as if it were nothing.
Pathetic.
This was so pathetic.
How could a grown man be this weak?
Even the children in the slums would have more strength than this.
He then immediately gave Caellum a look of pity, as if he had never seen a man as weak as him before.
Taking it in stride, Caellum quickly began telling his sob story while pinching his thighs in a practiced manner,
"My friend, you may not trust me, but now that we've shared food and drink, I trust you. You might not think so, but my life is so sad. I balance books all day and night for these god-damned scamming merchants who pay me pennies despite them making so much money. And to top it off, they force me to buy these useless clothes, so I look the part and don't dishonor them, so my pitiful salary covers nothing. They treat me worse than a dog, keeping me up all night and not even giving me a single candle to use as I read through ledgers and do mathematics in my head because I can't waste paper. It's gotten so bad that my eyes are permanently damaged, so I have to wear glasses all the time just to see. Because I'm trapped in the dark so much, my eyes have become light-sensitive. And to make matters worse, I just found out that I'm getting shipped off to the Icelands in the north to help do the books for a newly opened shop branch. Can you believe it? I'm only telling you both this because we're friends who've broken bread together, but I've never been kissed, I've never even found love or been touched by a woman, and now they're sending me to a land of snow and icicles where there will be no women. My balls will be frozen to my drawers, and my life will just be cold, misery, and balancing books! I refuse to go out like this, so I'm rebelling! Every bad thing my father told me not to do, I'll do it before I'm shipped to the frozen lands! Gambling, women, fighting rings, drinking, singing, pissing in the street, I want to experience it all! You have to help me, friends! Do you want me to suffer and be pathetic like this for the rest of my life?"
As Caellum cried before taking a huge swig of his beer, spilling the majority of it all over himself, the two men glanced at him with changed hearts.
Although he was a bit handsome…
Wasn't he just too pathetic?
Never been kissed, never been touched by a woman, and had a miserable life.
Truly, he was such a loser.
They might be poor and hard laborers, but they had better lives than this guy did, even if he did dress fancier and toss money around.
Looking at Caellum crying while drinking his sorrows away and pleading for their help, their egos puffed up.
"Well…that sounds sad but-"
"Sob, please, my friends! Don't let me die a virgin; let me enjoy life at least for one night. Help me! Teach me your ways! Teach me how to be a man! Sob sob"
As Caellum actually began to sob pathetically, the people in the surrounding tables, who had been listening to the pathetic life story, began getting involved.
"If they won't help you be a man, I will! If it's women you want. I recommend the Velvet Tunnel. The women are top-notch and affordable, too."
"How do I get there? How do I get there, my new friend?" Caellum spun his head to look at an older man missing all his teeth at another table.
"You don't even know this? Pathetic."
"You're right. I'm a pathetic loser who will never achieve anything in life and will die alone, sob sob." Caellum began pinching himself even harder under the table, forcing his shriveling tear glands to produce tears faster as he sobbed.
"Sorry! Sorry! You get there by-"
When the old man told him how to find the place, Caellum immediately perked up and turned to the server, giving her another coin.
"Pretty lady. Drinks and snacks for my new friend over there! Thank you, friend! Cheers!"
"Of course. Make sure you tell Rose I sent you!"
"I will! Thank you, friend! Now about gambling…"
"You wanted to gamble? Well, have you heard of Silver Scales?"
"No, what's that? A metal shop?" Caellum asked cluelessly.
"NO! Aish, what kind of life have you lived. This is why men need to travel and work hard instead of living in books. Silver Scales is the best spot with a high win rate! They have lots of games and the workers are friendly too!"
"Really? Do you think I can earn enough to quit my job so I don't have to go to the northern celand's friend?"
"That's a bit difficult-"
"Don't crush his dreams! Of course you can!"
"Yes! Then a drink for this friend as well, pretty lady! How did you say I could get there?"
"Well, don't tell anyone, but it's-"
As more and more people kept telling him about the supposedly easy spots for criminal activity, Caellum kept using Emrys's money to buy drinks until his decoy purse ran out.
After promising to come back and/or see them all later, he staggered out of the tavern to drunken cheers and into the carriage, standing off to the side, which had Urch guarding it while the driver waited patiently.
"Are you alive, young master? Do you need to vomit?" Urch asked as he wrinkled his nose from the stench of ale on Caellum, who was basically soaked through.
From the smell and the way he was staggering, he couldn't believe that he was still alive, much less coherent.
He helped the staggering Caellum enter the carriage while looking him over, but surprisingly, once the carriage door was shut, Caellum sat up on his own, and his eyes were completely clear as if he hadn't drunk a single drop.
"Huh?" as Urch looked confused, Caellum stretched before cracking his neck.
"I'm fine. And we're done for the day, so where do you want me to drop you off?" Caellum spoke seriously while adjusting his damp clothes.
The sun was setting soon, so he had done all that he could do for the day.
It was time a bit later than he wanted, but it was time to meet the queen.
She wouldn't be too upset right?
And even if she was, what would she do? Poison him?
Heh.
"You want to take me home?" Urch asked suspiciously.
Even though he had been kind to him all day and given him more money than he would have ever earned on his own, he didn't want someone to know where he lived.
"Otherwise? Shall I just give you your pay and let you find your own way home?"
"What if I say yes?" Urch asked mullishly.
"Okay." Caellum slipped 2 silvers out of his sleeves, placed them in Urch's hand, and swiftly booted him out of the carriage before slamming the door shut.
Bang!
"What the-"
As Urch sputtered furiously on the ground, Caellum slid the window open while looking down at him.
"The tour wasn't so bad, but we probably won't meet again, so be careful of you trying to rob in the future, and don't be so cheeky toward people you don't know."
Done saying what he had to say, Caellum shut the window and notified the driver to begin driving.
And as the carriage began moving slowly through the streets, Caellum relaxed while thinking of how his conversation with the queen would go.
And what he would be doing at night.
*****
And in the castle-
CRASH!
Queen Esmerelda flung her wine-filled glass at Tonil, the personal servant she had appointed for the 13th prince.
"Where did you say the 13th prince was?"
"He- uh- he decided to leave the castle and go on a tour of the city since it was a nice day and he was finally free from confinement." Tonil gulped out while keeping his head glued to the ground.