"Blair."
Herdin, anxiously watching her, scolded her while grasping her slender arm. Startled by his own agitated voice, he bit his lip.
Her captured arm seemed so fragile it might shatter with the slightest wrong pressure, filling him with unease.
Herdin composed his surging emotions, loosening his grip on her arm as he spoke.
"...You're delirious right now. Calm down and stop―"
"No, I don't want to."
Before his words finished, Blair pulled her arm away in resistance. Herdin's eyes wavered at her defiance.
Blair met his gaze directly and continued.
"If I recover my memories and it's a false accusation, I'll clear it for you. But if it's the truth, I'll resent you for life."
She didn't want to be trapped by an unknown past she couldn't remember, becoming a criminal or harboring endless grievances.
"I was sad too."
"...."
"It was hard for me too."
"...."
"Having to doubt the one who loved me so much and my mother, confirming the truth... it terrified me."
Once she began voicing the words she had swallowed out of fear of confronting him in her previous life, long-buried sorrow surged forth. Tears she had tried to hold back trailed down her cheeks.
Blair swallowed her rising sobs to continue speaking, ensuring her tears wouldn't halt her words.
"But I don't want to live burying it all anymore just because it's hard or scary."
Even if their bond was destined to end, she didn't want to flee in resignation like in her past life.
Herdin's fingertips trembled faintly as he gazed at Blair's tear-filled eyes. He clenched his hand tightly to still it.
She had looked at him with eyes brimming with tears many times before, but this was the first she had actually cried. Charging at him first was unexpected too.
Seeing her like this, he no longer wanted to fight her. He couldn't, to begin with.
"...I made a mistake."
His low, subdued voice echoed in the quiet room.
"I forgot that our contract is based on cooperation. And that cooperation requires trust."
"...."
"I won't doubt or interrogate you like today ever again."
Blair blankly stared at him apologizing so calmly.
She had confronted him head-on to avoid repeating their past relationship, but she hadn't imagined he would accept it so readily and apologize.
A sense of relief washed over her, mingled with a sudden thought.
What if, back then, I had clashed with you despite the fear.
Would our ending have been different? Would we not have had to take this long way around?
Now, it was a question without an answer.
"Rest now. You must be exhausted."
Following his words, Blair lay in bed. She had gone out after a long time, met a stranger, collapsed, and even argued with Herdin—naturally, she was worn out.
After confirming she was covered with the blanket, Herdin rose and approached the fireplace.
As Blair peeked only her eyes above the covers, watching his back curiously, his question floated over.
"Does lighting the fireplace scare you?"
His sudden question left Blair unable to answer readily.
It stemmed from the accident, but she had never admitted aloud fearing something others found normal.
Katrina had hated mentioning it, so she wanted to hide it as much as possible.
"Sleep first."
Herdin used the lighter beside the fireplace to ignite paper and toss it inside.
Wary of Blair having another episode, he kept watch on the bed, ready to extinguish it—but unlike his fears, even breathing soon sounded soon after. Occasional dry coughs mixed in.
Once the flames steadily caught on the logs, Herdin added a few more and sat beside the sleeping Blair.
Thanks to the rising warmth filling the room, faint color returned to her pale cheeks. Her peacefully sleeping face resembled a girl's.
Just like the day he first met her.
Over her face, which retained her childhood features, Esmeralda's voice suddenly resurfaced.
'It's not that child's fault. Blair is a good girl. Regardless of what her mother is like. Don't you think so too?'
Suddenly, the day he first met Blair came to mind.
* * *
To be precise, it was a week after their first meeting.
A week after New Year's Festival, Herdin visited the Empress's Palace again, bringing the Rabbit Fur Earplugs Blair had lent him.
Herdin held out the earplugs to Esmeralda. She tilted her head.
"Oh, where did you get such a cute thing? You didn't prepare this tiny thing as a gift for me, did you?"
"Princess Imperial Highness lent them to me. I brought them so Your Majesty could return them."
"Blair? When?"
"...Didn't you hear?"
"What story? Blair didn't say a word."
The princess was desperate to impress his aunt. So he assumed she would have told her to earn praise.
Suddenly, Blair's words as she left him that day came to mind.
'I'll keep today a secret.'
She truly hadn't told even Esmeralda, despite it being a chance for the praise she so desired.
Herdin was stunned by that fact.
"What happened with Blair?"
Esmeralda asked with intense curiosity.
Herdin briefly explained the day's events: how Blair had followed him to the garden for a breather (he lied here to spare Esmeralda worry), and given him the earplugs to block his ears.
Throughout the story, Esmeralda smiled broadly, her face full of adoration for the two children.
After hearing everything, Esmeralda handed the earplugs back to Herdin.
"Then you take them back to her."
"Pardon...?"
"The one who received the favor should personally give thanks. Trying to foist it on me? You've grown up and now treat me like your errand runner."
Her voice brimmed with playfulness, but he knew it wasn't entirely a joke.
Even he realized passing the gratitude to his aunt was discourteous to the one who helped him.
But he didn't want to go to Blair himself.
She was that empress's daughter.
His aunt was benevolent enough to embrace even her, but he wasn't. He wanted to avoid her as much as possible, fearing the innocent princess might grow fond of him.
"By the way, did you really wear these earplugs? Must have been adorable. Want to try them in front of me once?"
As he pondered seriously, Esmeralda suddenly approached with the Rabbit Fur Earplugs, her face full of mischief.
Herdin recoiled in horror.
"I didn't wear them! I just held them."
Esmeralda giggled at him, then regretfully set them down. Her gaze toward Herdin now calm and settled, unlike before.
"Herdin. Do you dislike Blair?"
Herdin couldn't answer.
It wasn't the girl herself he disliked, just her background. So if forced to choose, yes, closer to dislike.
But denying it required lying, which he wasn't good at, and affirming it made him seem petty compared to his aunt.
"Blair isn't noisy like the kids you hate, nor does she blindly resent or curse you, right? And she helped you."
Silent as his aunt spoke, Herdin finally opened his mouth.
"...But she's that woman's daughter."
"You mustn't think that way. It's not the child's fault."
"...."
"Blair is a good girl. Regardless of what her mother is like. Don't you think so too?"
Herdin couldn't refute her. Separating Blair from Katrina was impossible for him, but as Esmeralda said, the princess was kind.
He had simply denied it because his position demanded he dislike her.
"I'm sorry for dragging you children into adults' petty conflicts."
Esmeralda smiled bitterly, and Herdin fell silent watching her.
His aunt was a good person.
She had cared for him tenderly after losing his parents young. Like a mother to him.
Thus, unable to defy such a person, he eventually took the earplugs and visited the Princess Palace himself.
The knights guarding the Princess Palace were visibly flustered by the unexpected visit from the Delmark Duke.
"I came to express thanks for the grace Princess Imperial Highness showed me at New Year's Festival."
As Herdin spoke to the knights, a small shadow fell from above.
Looking up reflexively, he saw Blair on the balcony, rubbing her still-sleepy eyes.
Blinking her half-closed eyes, she suddenly slapped her cheeks with both hands, as if waking herself. Then their eyes met abruptly.
Her tousled platinum hair sparkled in the morning sun, her chilled-reddened face topped with wide violet eyes.
A sigh escaped her small, pouting lips, her tiny face crumpling into a wail.
"Nanny!"
Her voice faintly carried as she dashed back inside, words like 'What do I do! The Delmark Duke is here! I haven't even washed my face yet...' trailing. She seemed unaware the balcony door was open.
Herdin chuckled hearing it.
Her wide eyes, her crumpling face.
Just witnessing that made him glad he had listened to his aunt, on that winter morning.