Right now, Kara was staring at his phone screen with a completely blank, traumatized expression. The recipient's name on the J-Cepat app this morning was none other than: Jojo-chan (The Glowing Goddess).
Baskara let out a long, heavy sigh.
"Tem, did you purposely put this address at the very top of the list?! I literally swore I'd never pass through that alley again!"
[Wallet balance detection: Critical. Pride detection: Non-existent since yesterday. System's advice: Leave right now, or I'll change your ringtone to a Kuntilanak cackling every time you get a notification!]
Kara scoffed. Damn it, his System was threatening him again.
"Shut up, Tem! Fine, I'm going! Do it for Cruel's milk boxes!" Baskara snapped back in annoyance. He immediately started his motorcycle to deliver the batch of packages.
When he arrived in front of Jojo-chan's house, Kara almost fainted on the spot.
Turns out, gathering on the front porch were four other guys who shared the exact same vibe as Jojo—wearing pastel clothes, smelling like a whole flower garden, and casually doing face masks together.
"Oh... look who's coming! My Sunshine is here!" Jojo-chan shouted, waving gracefully. His friends immediately turned around in unison to look at Kara, completely mimicking a horror movie scene, but the aesthetic version.
"Gosh Jo, the courier is actually so handsome. Like a total sweet cutie," one of his friends whispered, the one wearing a cat-ear headband.
Kara tried his best to stay professional even though his hands were shaking as he handed over the package. "Package under the name Jojo-chan... please sign here, sir."
"Don't call me sir, just call me 'Sista' so we can be close," Jojo teased while signing. "By the way, Ra, are you busy tomorrow? We have a live music event for the grand opening of the neighborhood moms' fitness studio, but the MC suddenly came down with typhus. Wanna help us out?"
Kara immediately shook his head at lightning speed.
"No, sir... I mean, Sista. I'm a courier, not a talk show host."
"The pay is three times your weekly courier salary, you know, Ra. Just for two hours. Plus an all-you-can-eat buffet lunch, and you can totally pack the leftovers home," Jojo added casually while checking his nails.
The moment he heard the words 'Three times' and 'Pack the leftovers', Kara's ears practically stood upright. The System in his head instantly chimed Tring-Tring-Cha-Ching! The young man immediately broke into a wide smile.
"What time is the event? Is the mic wired or wireless? I can start right now if needed," Kara answered without a single shred of hesitation. Self-respect? What even is that? Can you eat self-respect?
Jojo let out a soft chuckle and looked back at Baskara.
"Tomorrow, man. Just come with us, we're heading there too, right guys?" Jojo asked his friends, who immediately nodded along.
"Alright then, I'll take my leave now. I still have a ton of packages to deliver," Baskara replied quickly.
"Hey! Don't you wanna hang out for a bit first?"
Kara shook his head.
"Orders are piling up. Thanks for the offer, excuse me," he added, immediately hopping onto his bike and driving away, leaving the group of guys standing there in silence.
"First time I've ever seen a courier that good-looking," one of Jojo's friends muttered.
"Right? I should probably ask him to deliver packages to my house. I'll order something every day just to get some eye candy."
"Alright, alright, why are we suddenly gossiping about this? Where were we with our conversation earlier?" Jojo asked, breaking up the chatter about Baskara.
And true enough, just as agreed yesterday, Kara was now standing on a small stage wearing a borrowed suit from Jojo-chan that was a little too tight around the shoulders. Figures, since his shoulders were naturally broader. But the tight suit didn't bother Baskara at all; in fact, he looked incredibly energetic as he greeted the moms gathered there.
In front of him, hundreds of neighborhood moms were already lined up neatly in neon-colored workout gear.
"CHECK... ONE, TWO... ALRIGHT, MOMS! LET ME HEAR SOME NOISE?!" Kara shouted into the mic with full enthusiasm.
Unexpectedly, Kara had a hidden talent for hyping up a crowd. His sarcastic and snarky comments were actually considered hilarious by the moms.
"YOU, THE MOM IN THE YELLOW SHIRT IN THE CORNER! PUT SOME ENERGY INTO THAT WORKOUT, MA'AM! JUST IMAGINE YOU'RE CRUSHING CHILI SAUCE FOR A HUSBAND WHO NEVER COMES HOME!"
Instantly, the moms burst into roaring laughter. Instead of continuing their workout, they actually approached and crowded around the stage.
"The MC is so funny! What's his name? Is he married yet?!" one of the moms shouted while throwing a ten-thousand-rupiah bill onto the stage as a tip.
Kara picked up the tipped cash with lightning-fast agility.
"Not married yet, ma'am! I only have one little brother, and he eats as much as a piranha! Come on, moms, keep moving! Right after this, we have a raffle draw for a non-stick frying pan!"
Jojo-chan and his squad at the side of the stage could only stand there slack-jawed.
"Insane. The moment Kara sees money, his courier soul instantly swaps out for a superstar soul!"
"Bro, I thought the kid was the quiet type!!"
"Right? I totally thought so too."
Back to Baskara, he was still busy picking up the cash tips from the moms without a single ounce of shame.
[Achievement Unlocked: 'The Moms' Ideal Son-in-Law'. Cash points increased drastically. System's advice: Don't get too carried away dancing, remember your packages haven't been fully delivered yet.]
'Yeah, yeah, Tem, I know. Just shut up,' Kara monologued without breaking his focus from the money.
[Fucking gold-digger, money-grubber.]
Just as Kara was about to step down from the stage while counting his thick stack of ten-thousand-rupiah bills, his right hand was suddenly grabbed by the Neighborhood Chief's Wife, who arrived wearing a tiger-print house dress and enough gold jewelry to literally pay off the national debt if sold.
"Mr. MC! Oh, don't be in such a hurry to leave. You see, there's a small thanksgiving feast at my house. Please drop by, it's just next door!" the Chief's wife said, pulling Kara's hand with a strength that made absolutely no sense for an old lady.
"Uh, ma'am, I have to deliver packages... the packages are practically crying on my bike," Kara excused himself, trying to plant his feet so he wouldn't get dragged away.
"Oh, forget about the packages! Come on, let's go! There's jengkol rendang and special es teler for our handsome MC here. My friends also want to get to know you better, they said they want to ask for your recipe to get a booming voice like yours!"
Kara glanced back toward Jojo-chan, who was currently laughing his head off in the corner while waving, "Have fun, Sunshine!"
Kara let out a resigned sigh, and in the end, he was dragged away by the Chief's wife to her house.
When he arrived at her place, Kara was even more shocked. In the living room sat five neighborhood moms whose gazes at Kara were exactly like lions staring at a premium steak. Kara felt goosebumps break out across his entire body.
"Please sit down, Mr... what was your name again? Baskara, right? Gosh, what a manly name, just like a lead actor in a soap opera," Mrs. Bambang said, shifting her seating position to get closer to Baskara.
Kara sat rigidly, his hands busy holding a plastic plate that had suddenly been piled high with rice and side dishes.
"Yes, ma'am, just call me Kara. Actually, I really need to..."
"Does Mr. Kara have a girlfriend yet? Or maybe you're looking for someone more mature? I mean, mature in thinking, mature financially..." the Chief's wife asked, winking with eyelashes so thick that the young man genuinely feared they might detach and fly straight into his plate. His thoughts were truly running wild.
'Tem, help me!!! I don't want to become their lunch, huhuhu,' Kara thought in frustration.
[Critical Situation Detected! You are currently surrounded by Max-Level Socialite Predators. System's advice: Eat at lightning speed, pack whatever can be packed, and then fake a faint or pretend you just got a call from the President!]
Baskara let out a long sigh, then looked back at the moms.
"I... I'm focusing on taking care of my little brother first, ma'am. He's still small, if I'm even a little late coming home, he starts eating the neighbor's sandals," Kara lied blatantly while shoveling the jengkol rendang into his mouth at the speed of light.
"Oh, you're such a sweet brother. You're definitely total husband material! Here, young man, take this tiffin carrier home. I've already filled it with fried chicken and chili liver stir-fry. So your brother doesn't have to eat sandals anymore," the Chief's wife said, handing him a three-tiered tiffin carrier.
Kara stared blankly. He was caught between fear and pure joy from getting a three-day supply of food.
"Young man, if you ever need cash just give me a ring, okay? I'd gladly pay you if you keep me company for a night," one of the moms smiled, making Kara's eyes instantly go wide.
"K-Keep you company?"
"Yes, young man, keep us company. We'll pay whatever amount, don't worry~ we're quite experienced, you know," it wasn't that mom who answered, but the Chief's wife, giving a look like a witch who could skin him alive.
"My daughter said she'd want to join too if you're down. I have six maiden daughters, young man, all of them are beautiful."
Baskara swallowed hard. For some reason, he felt like he was surrounded by predators. He had to make a decision before it was too late! Yes! He had to be fast.
"Thank you so much, ladies. I... I have to excuse myself. My stomach suddenly started contracting, feels like the jengkol is getting a bit too enthusiastic in there," Kara immediately stood up, grabbed the tiffin carrier, and bolted out of the house before he could be asked any further to become a boy toy or a son-in-law on the spot.
Kara ran out of the front gate carrying the three-tiered tiffin carrier with a running style that resembled someone who had just been kidnapped, which a second later shifted into the walk of someone who had just won a laundry soap raffle. For some reason his legs felt suddenly weak, but Kara ignored it and focused on walking.
Just a few steps away from the house, he suddenly stopped in his tracks when he saw a group of neighborhood middle-aged men gathered at the security post ahead.
The atmosphere was tense. One man had a thick handlebar mustache curved upward like a bull's horns, another had a bald head so shiny that the streetlamp reflected off it, and all of them had their arms crossed while glaring coldly at Kara.
"Ahem... Mr. MC," the voice of the mustachioed man was incredibly deep, successfully shrinking Kara's newly grown confidence right back down. "Took you quite a long time inside, huh? Pretty comfortable in there?"
Kara swallowed hard. "Uh, sir... I was just eating jengkol earlier. I swear, sir, I didn't do anything. I'm just a courier who doubled as a buffet victim."
The bald man took a step forward, adjusting his sagging sarong. "A guy is always the smartest at making friends... especially when those friends are high-society moms... am I right?" the bald man's voice was just as deep.
[Social Jealousy Detected! Danger Level: 8/10. These uncles seem jealous because you got jengkol rendang while they only got instant coffee sachets. System's advice: Make them an offer they can't refuse!]
Baskara broke out into a cold sweat.
"Sirs... I swear to God," Kara lifted his tiffin carrier. "If you guys want it, you can have all of this fried chicken and chili liver stir-fry. I'm giving it up freely. I just want to go home, my little brother is waiting for me."
The moment they heard the words 'Fried Chicken', the cold glares on the men's faces vanished instantly. The man with the handlebar mustache immediately threw his arm around Kara's shoulder with a blooming smile.
"Hey! Why are you talking like that, kiddo? We were just testing your mental grit, son!" The mustachioed uncle laughed out loud, his voice sounding like a broken muffler. "Turns out you're a generous one. Rare to see young folks nowadays willing to share their tributes from the moms."
"Yeah, son. We've basically considered you one of our own ever since you were shouting about that non-stick frying pan on stage earlier. You've got guts, I like it!" The bald uncle joined in, patting Kara's back so hard that Baskara almost choked on his own spit.
"Come on, don't go home just yet! Let's head to the post! We'll play some dominoes while polishing off this chicken. You're amazing, you managed to make my wife stop nagged all day because she won that raffle prize!"
Kara, who originally wanted to escape, was now being ushered to the security post. The young man sat right in the middle of the "Sarong Uncle Gang."
"Now that's what I'm talking about! Young folks need to be tight with the elders. That way, your package delivery routes in this complex will be smooth sailing!"
Kara could only resign to his fate. His hands were holding domino cards, his mouth was busy chewing fried chicken, and he was honestly pretty confused. He thought he was going to be executed by these uncles, but his assumption turned out to be completely wrong. Instead, he was surrounded by middle-aged men calling him "Le" (son) every two seconds. Well, at least he could experience the role of a father temporarily. From the start, Abi had never treated him like this. Turns out having a father figure is important... and just as crucial as a mother figure.
'System... why has my life turned into this? I'm a package courier, not the neighborhood mascot!'
The System actually smirked when Baskara suddenly complained.
[Congratulations! You have obtained protection from the 'Supreme Council of Bapak-Bapak'. Insider Connection points increased drastically. Bonus: You now have 10 new adoptive fathers ready to defend you if the Chief's wife forces you to become her son-in-law. Or even worse, you might get 100% backing to marry one of their daughters without an interview.]
'No way!! I'm not interested!!' Kara mentally snapped back.
[Oh, look at you saying you're not interested. How long do you plan on staying single? Looks like you were single in your first life too. Well, I don't mind personally, but I'm just afraid that if you reject their proposals, you'll end up getting hit with black magic and love spells by them.]
Baskara rolled his eyes in annoyance.
'You really love mocking me, don't you. Just watch it. Whatever, I want to continue playing, you just stay quiet.'
The System scoffed, but suddenly it received a notification from headquarters.
[I have to head out for a bit, Deadweight. Got a call from the boss.]
'That's rare. You didn't get summoned because of the way I've been working, right?'
[Who knows, I have no idea either. Alright, I'll be off now, I'll probably be back tomorrow.]
'Tomorrow? That's taking forever.'
[Aww, are you gonna miss me if I'm gone for too long~]
The System teased, which immediately made Baskara roll his eyes in annoyance again.
'Just get lost already, who would miss you? If anything, I'll get some peace and quiet without you around.'
[Hahahahah, look at you being too shy to say you're worried. Whatever, I'm off, bye!!]
The System vanished, replaced only by a blank translucent screen floating in the air. Baskara didn't pay it much mind; he returned to his game with the uncles. And what happened after that, nobody could have ever predicted...