The perfect sunlight of June filtered through the windows of Mrs Gerald's office. Even though the sky was a clear blue and the bushes in the garden outside were in perfect colour and shape ,in a testament to the gardeners care, typhoon nervousness I felt was quite a contrast.
The perfect weather was as though nothing in the world intended to change. As though lives did not shift in a single conversation.
As though mine would remain the same.
I smoothed the skirt of my gown feeling out of place.
"I hope you are not intending to waste my time Miss Woodbury" Mrs Gerald said her glasses perched on the bridge of her nose as she oooked at me with a cold,professional gaze.
"Of course not." I replied with respect.
"Good."
She opened a drawer and pulled out a letter. She handed it to me.
It took me a moment to register the words.
"A few days ago, I received a letter from a gentleman of high standing". Mrs Gerald said ,watched as I read the letter. "He requested for a governess. Two children. Immediate arrangement".
"Children?" The word left me before I could stop it. I looked up, my pulse quickening. "You mean… I am to teach?"
"To instruct," she corrected. "Piano."
The room seemed to shrink.
I tightened my grip on the paper. "Why me?"
There were dozens of girls at the academy—girls more graceful, more obedient, more suited to such quiet responsibility.
"Because," Madam Gerald said, rising slowly from her chair, "you are one of the finest musicians this institution has produced."
She began to pace, each step measured, deliberate.
"You have discipline. Precision. Endurance." Her eyes flicked toward me. "And you have been here long enough to repay what has been invested in you."
Repay.
The word lingered.
Ten years. I had spent ten years within these walls—arriving as a child, leaving… what, exactly? A performer? A tool? Something to be sent away when I had become useful enough?
For ten years I had learned in the academy. Played piano. I played day after day, hour after hour. Until it felt like my own breathing was to press my fingers on the keys.
I had learned more than a hundred songs and played them with skill that came with what the instructors would say hard work and dedication.
"I see".
I did not. At all. All I saw was doubt and a need for my life to stay the same.
"But will I be paid?" I asked.
"What on earth do you mean?" She said raising an eyebrow.
"Surely I must be doing great effort to teach the children".
Her voice was stern. "No you will not be paid".
The disappointment hit harder than I thought it would, but I swallowed it in.
"But this is an opportunity that will also give you an advantage. If you teach well and your efforts are notices you might become known in the great areas of music."
She said "it will make up for the terms and ceremonies you will miss."
"I guess so." I said under my breath.
"So..with all that settled." Mrs Gerald said ,she took back the letter. "Do you volunteer?"
I didn't answer immediately. Instead I looked out the window, at the garden with bright and lively shades of green and flowers that smitten a sweet smell that one could sense from a thousand miles away.
If I stayed, life would be the same. I would still play piano endlessly whiles hoping my talent would land me somewhere—anywhere. I would graduate and live life as a normal human being, as if the academy was just where my home was until I decided to make my own.
But if I left, I would live with different people. Meet new people and perhaps I might become close to someone or find something that will make me realize I would never have discovered it if I just….embraced discovering.
I looked back at Mrs Gerald, her expression waiting for my answer.
"Ok I will volunteer."
She smiled, satisfaction in the curve of her lips.
"Good, you will be informed of your departure soon." She got up opening the door which meant it was time for me to leave. "For now, go on with your piano lessons and make as much memories as possible. You can tell people but don't turn it into something that will cause spine breaking drama."
"Yes Ma'am." I got up and left.
Behind me madam Gerald closed the door.
And that was it. The conversation had ended. My decision final.
I would be a..
Governess.
To strangers.
Unpaid.
Uncertain.
But willing.
And if it wasn't worth it….
I had traded my ten years in the academy for nothing.